The Stars in the Sky (Giving You ... #2) (15 page)

As he walked away, I saw him stifle a laugh as I tried, yet again, to get the kids to sing, saying "Come on, everyone! Let's do this!"

I needed help. I didn't need to be left struggling alone by the guy who wanted to get in my pants. Jerk.

After a few more attempts at group activities, I gave up, letting the kids just hang out around the campfire. Some took out their cell phones, while others chatted with each other. They seemed to like this better than an organized activity.

I implemented a no cell phone rule beginning immediately.

What a depressing end to the day. I wanted to make connections with the kids and have some fun. I did not want to be a freak show.

When the kids were finally in bed that night, I went to my bunk and crashed, tired, and for once not thinking about joining Will in his bed.

But I couldn't sleep. I was pissed.

I got more pissed the more that I thought about it.

Will should have set aside any embarrassment and supported me. I’d needed help getting these kids to open up and, instead, he’d left me.

I texted Amelia.

Will just treated me like shit.

What?! Honey. What did he do?

I had a bad first day with this group of city kids from Oakland and he just laughed at me and watched me crash and burn instead of helping to make it better.

You know what the right answer is, right? You need to talk with him. Guys can't read your mind and sometimes they don't know when they hurt you.

I sighed. She was right. She had such a healthy relationship with Ryan, she knew what to do. I got out of bed, put on flip flops, put my hair up in a messy bun on the top of my head, grabbed a hoodie, and headed over to Will's house.

When he opened the door, barechested, in sweats, he started to say, "Wondered if you were gonna come over—" but I pushed him inside, and started immediately talking to him in the hallway.

"I'm pissed at you. You treated me like shit tonight. Remember last week, when Clarissa said your hair sang that you were true and passionate and kind? Well it didn't feel like that. It felt like you were a jerk and an asshole. I needed some help and you didn't stick up for me. You treated me like I was the monkey exhibit at the zoo. And you want me to go out with you? Well this is why I won't. I'm just an amusing cunt to you, not girlfriend material. You don't say much, Silent Sam, so I watch your actions. And your actions tonight were shitty, Will."

He stared at me, his brown eyes big, and then he reached over to brush my cheek. I flinched and brushed his hand aside and continued, "I was being laughed at enough by the kids and they were completely disrespectful. These are tough kids, Will. They don't know about camp life. I bet a lot of them are raised by a single parent or a grandparent or have family members on drugs or aren't doing well in school because they have no support and no role models. I need to do silly things with them. Wholesome things. They don't need everything to be cynical."

Will let out a deep breath and put his head down. Then he raised his head and looked at me.

"I'm sorry," he said, his eyes softening.

"What?"

"I'm sorry," he repeated sincerely. "You're right, that was a dick move. Fucked up. Didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't realize—"

And then the house started shaking, the pictures started violently moving on the walls, the lamps started skidding toward the end of the table, and I heard the crash of glass breaking.

Earthquake!

Campout

EVERYTHING AROUND US THAT was supposed to be still, was moving. We stood in the front room of Will's old farmhouse, the antique ceiling light swinging, a spindly wooden chair falling over, and papers and photographs falling off of a side table.

Crash!

That sounded like the dishes fell off of a shelf in the kitchen.

Breaking glass.

Oh no!

The pictures swung off-kilter on the walls.

We’d been placed in a life-sized cardboard box, and now a malevolent giant was shaking that box with us in it.

I wanted to get out of that cardboard box.

We
needed to get out of the house,
now
.

Will grabbed my hand and pulled me outside the house, down the porch, and to the middle of the Headlands compound. As we ran, I stumbled and he caught me. It was hard to run during an earthquake.

The moonlight illuminated the dark ground. We could hear the leaves on the trees rustling, and we could actually see the earth undulate, starting from the hills and working its way down to the fields. Watching the earth move in waves like it was the ocean was one of the eeriest things I'd ever experienced. While quiet outside, as the earth moved, it made a low groan. The buildings creaked.

I realized that my arms and legs shook and that I was suddenly close to tears. I didn't want to panic. I didn't know if I was the type to panic.

All I knew was that I had to keep it together because we had a lot of people and animals to take care of. I could collapse later.

I took a deep breath.

As suddenly as it had come on, the earth quieted down. After an earthquake, your body had the memory of the movement stored and it always felt like, "
What was that? An aftershock?
" Your body and mind played tricks on you and afterward you often felt the ground moving for a long time.

He spoke first, quickly, still holding my hand, which he squeezed. "Here's the plan. You okay?" I nodded. "I'm gonna run, help my dad with my ma, make sure she's okay, then meet you at the bunkhouse. You get the kids out. Don't want them to be in there in case there are aftershocks. Think we'll just set up camp in a field. Safest place in an earthquake is out in the open. We'll keep 'em away from structures until we can check for damage. We'll clean up in the morning when we can see better. I'll get tarps, you have 'em get blankets. I'll tell the ranch hands to help." He looked me up and down, hard, and seemed to be satisfied. He squeezed my hand again.

And then he took off, barefoot, sprinting to his parents' house, wearing just his black track pants, his back muscles rippling. I ran to the bunkhouse in my flip flops. I could see several wranglers headed toward the barn.

As I ran up to the bunkhouse, I heard voices and knew that this was a vigorous enough earthquake to wake everyone up; I would guess that it was at least a five on the Richter scale, if not higher.

Once I got inside, kids were screaming and Maurice was on the stairs, talking with Tricia and the adult chaperones. I ran up to them.

"Will wants us to evacuate the buildings, and we're going to have a campout under the stars until we can check for damage in the morning. Get the kids to grab a pillow and sleeping bag and any cushions and head outside. Count heads. We'll regroup in the field."

I ran down the stairs and into Janiqua, the girl with the three braids, in pink pajamas, bleary eyed, and close to tears. I wrapped her in my arms and snuggled her close, hugging her hard. She half-sobbed into my chest. "Are the horses going to be okay?"

Gently patting her head, stroking it soothingly, I said as quickly as I could without making it seem rushed, "Yes, sweetie, we're going to take care of all of the animals. They have safe places to be. We'll make sure of it." I pulled back and looked her in the eyes, giving her a small smile. "Now put on shoes and get a sweater, your pillow, and sleeping bag, and meet me out front."

I hustled into each room, repeating the instructions. The kids obeyed quickly. They sensed that this was important because inside there was damage. A few of the empty bunk beds had tipped over and the office was a mess.

Enrique, the sharp-dressed Hispanic kid, came up to me, wearing pajamas with Stewie from the Family Guy on the pants and a gray t-shirt, an anxious look on his face making him look much, much younger. "I want to call my mom."

I relented, giving him a tight smile. "Bring your phone, it's okay, but wait until we get outside to use it." I felt the relief appear on his face.

Once we all got outside, the girls huddled around Tricia, the boys around Maurice, and we counted noses, made sure everyone was there, laden with pillows and sleeping bags, and we headed over to where the ranch hands were setting up a camp site.

I wasn't sure that I wanted to sleep on the ground, but I faked enthusiasm.

"C'mon guys, it's a warm night and the stars are beautiful. It will be fun."

Some of the kids looked at me like they believed me. James, the sweary kid, looked like he was finally interested in something. I guess it took a natural disaster to have him come around.

Will came running up, still barefoot, still without a shirt on, his hair wild, and asked me, "Everyone okay?"

I nodded and he started talking with the kids. Claudio, one of the ranch hands, had set up a few old-fashioned Coleman lanterns and the adults had flashlights.

"All of you are gonna get taken care of by Marie. I'm gonna check on the horses and the other animals and then I'm gonna come back and check on you. Power's still on and we have a backup generator, so we should be fine. This is just a precaution. Don't want nothing to fall on you in the bunkhouse and it's a nice night to see the sky. I'm gonna go see how the wranglers are doin' and I'll come back and stay with y'all."

Will headed over to join the wranglers at the corrals to check on the horses and make sure that all of the animals were secure. I could hear neighing and the horses did not sound happy.

I hoped that Happy, my horse, wasn't scared.

Cookie came up to me. "You want I should make some hot water for cocoa?"

"Good idea," I said.

He lumbered up to the kitchen and I went over to help the chaperones and the leaders set up the kids, arranging sleeping bags and pillows, and getting everyone tucked in. The kids seemed to like huddling together in their sleeping bags outside on a farm, and talked quietly among themselves.

Despite things calming down, I felt anxious and jumpy not knowing the news. I stayed put with the kids, walking around, making sure that they were all okay.

Cookie came out with an urn of hot water and paper cups and made instant hot chocolate with marshmallows for those who wanted it. This quieted the kids down as they sipped their treat.

Will and the wranglers came back from checking on the horses and he came right over to me, resting a finger on my wrist and leaning over. "You're working hard, Marie," he said in my ear. "Good job. Like your level head."

"Thanks," I whispered.

He looked at me like he wanted to say something more, but didn't. He paused and went on. "Don't think it's safe to go back yet. There's debris everywhere. We'll get it in the daylight. No sense making a racket that will keep up the kids."

I nodded.

"No structural damage that I can tell right now. Everything's wooden and has survived a lot of earthquakes. My ma is fine, their house is new and earthquake-safe. They're going to stay put." The look on his face was reassuring and made me feel better. I just wanted to stay by him at all times. “Hang on,” he said, and ran his hand down my arm to my hand and gave me a squeeze. Then he let go.

He left me for a moment to go into the house. He came back, still shirtless, but with a stack of quilts, blankets, and pillows. In front of everyone, he knelt and made up a bed for us, out in the open, under the dark night sky.

A cool breeze touched our cheeks, but it was otherwise a silent and warm night. There were a few eyes on us, curious, but, well, fuck it. We walked around, turned the lanterns off, and wished the kids goodnight. He handed me a pillow, and whispered, "C'mere darlin'."

I fell into his arms, standing up, getting a hug that I desperately needed from him. It was like that old fashioned saying, his strength gave me comfort. It really did, feeling his massive arms around me, embracing me, my cheek nestled into his powerful chest. He kissed the top of my head and whispered, "Time for bed."

I figured that it’d be uncomfortable on the ground, but since it was a group sleepover, I wanted to participate rather than throw a fit. The earth actually wasn't that hard with the folded blankets that Will had used as cushions. We both got down on the ground and he curled up behind me, putting his arms around my body, his chin on my shoulder. He gave me a big squeeze with his bare arms and his warmth seeped through my clothes. I felt completely enveloped by him, and snuggled into him. I lay there for a while, listening to the quiet night sounds and the sounds of the kids sleeping, but then fell asleep tucked into Will, under his red and white quilt.

While I didn't want to overthink my summer adventure, I think that without saying a word, Will-style, something had changed.

I think we were together now.