The Summer Garden (18 page)

“You can ask her that yourself,” Heather said, already slipping out of the booth as Megan came into the café. “Come on, Bree. We need to go to work.”

“But all the excitement is going to be here,” Bree protested.

“Come on,” Heather insisted, pausing to give Megan a hug before dragging her sister-in-law away.

“I’m sorry,” Moira said at once. “I wanted you to hear about all this from me.”

“You mean the fact that you’re giving up the opportunity of a lifetime to be a waitress?” Megan asked quietly as she signaled Sally for a cup of coffee.

“Not a waitress,” Moira objected. “A consultant.”

Megan lifted a brow. “Seriously?”

“Okay, yes, I’ll be waiting on tables and cooking from time to time, but it’s what I want,” she told her, her jaw set stubbornly.

“If it truly is, then you have my blessing,” Megan said. “But if this is because of Luke, you’re making a terrible mistake. Are you afraid he can’t handle you becoming a huge success?”

“Absolutely not,” Moira said, then frowned. Megan sounded so sure that what she was doing was something she’d come to regret. “Do you think he’ll never want me the way I want him? Is that why you think I’m making a mistake?”

“No. What I fear is that you’re walking away from a career that could give you fame and creative satisfaction, to say nothing of great financial rewards.”

“Do I have to choose?” Moira asked wistfully. “I mean, right at the moment? I know you’re an expert and I respect your opinion, but there’s no certainty that I could be a success at photography, is there? I know it’s a world that can be capricious, especially at the artistic end of it, as you’re proposing.”

“So you’re scared of failing?” Megan asked, looking disappointed.

Moira shook her head indignantly. “Not at all,” she insisted. “Luke asked the same thing, but it’s not that. I swear it isn’t.”

“Then explain it to me, because I honestly don’t understand,” Megan said.

“It would mean giving up a certainty, something I know and love, for what could be no more than a pipe dream,” Moira told her earnestly. “It’s as if I’m at this fork in the road and I’m choosing the one that feels right, familiar to me.”

“But it’s only when we take the other fork that we grow,” Megan said. “I’m sure you’ve heard the story of me walking out on Mick all those years ago. If I’d listened solely to my heart, I’d have stayed right here with my family, even though I was terribly unhappy. By choosing to take the risk of losing, look at all I gained. I have a career that truly fulfills me.”

“But you came close to losing your children in the bargain,” Moira reminded her. “Was it worth that sacrifice?”

Megan’s face clouded over and, for a minute, Moira thought she might have gone too far, broaching a subject that was way too personal. But Megan, after all, was the one who’d brought it up to make her own point.

“I’m sorry,” Moira apologized. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Of course you should have,” Megan replied. “And it was a terrible sacrifice. I’m still making up for it. The hurt I caused might not have been intentional, but it’s taken me years to make amends to my children.”

“Knowing all that you know now, would you do it again?” Moira asked.

Megan’s lips curved slightly. “I like to think that I’m far wiser now, that I would fight harder for what I wanted in the first place, rather than walking away in frustration and anger. In the end, though, if the circumstances were precisely the same, I would probably do it over again. I hope, though, that I wouldn’t allow my children to stay behind. That was the real mistake I made. I let Mick convince me that they should stay here in their own home, surrounded by friends and family. I could see the blessing in that, but I know now that they lost something as well. They lost me. Worse, they didn’t understand why.” She shrugged. “So, while they might have hated moving with me to New York, they wouldn’t have felt abandoned. The scar that left will never be entirely healed.”

“I suppose there can be unplanned repercussions to any decision, even those that are the most carefully thought out,” Moira said.

“No question about it.” Megan smiled. “And have you carefully thought about yours? Or did you make the decision on impulse?”

“A mix of the two, I imagine,” Moira admitted. “I gave it thought, of course, but there hasn’t been a lot of time to weigh the pros and cons.”

“Could we make a deal, then?” Megan suggested. “Will you promise me not to give up entirely on photography? Will you continue to build your portfolio and work with me to mount a show here? There’s little risk in that, and you’ll be right here with Luke while you try. It seems to me it could be a win-win. If the show’s the success I envision, you’ll have a real choice to make then, not one that’s based on fear or what-ifs.”

Under the circumstances, it was the fairest offer imaginable. Moira knew she’d be an idiot to reject it. “I can promise that much,” she said.

And if it turned out that the path she thought she wanted—one that led to a home with Luke and a family—was her destiny, she’d have chosen it fair and square, rather than by default.

“You’ve a great talent for negotiating,” she told Megan.

Megan winked at her. “In my business, it’s why I make the big bucks for my clients. I’m convinced that you’re going to be one of them, Moira. Perhaps one of the best.”

When Moira was about to speak, Megan held up her hand. “Before you argue that I shouldn’t count on that, that you could decide photography is not what you want, keep in mind that there’s a third option. Some people manage to blend a family and a career without sacrificing either one of them. It doesn’t have to be an either/or decision. You could have the best of both worlds. The only certainty, Moira, is that you’ll never know if you could be one of them unless you try.”

Moira was still sitting where Megan had left her, sipping her fourth cup of coffee, when Nell and her grandfather came in.

“Here you are,” Dillon said, looking delighted. “Everyone’s been wondering where you were.”

She smiled at that. “It’s not as if the town much cares about my comings and goings,” she said.

“Luke does,” Nell responded. “And he’s been watching the door at the pub all morning. You’re supposed to be there to begin training the waitstaff soon.”

Moira had a moment of panic, then drew in a breath. “Not today,” she said. “Luke’s only hiring them today. Training’s due to begin tomorrow.”

“When we were there just now, he was grumbling that he wanted your input on his final choices,” Nell said.

Moira brightened at once. “Really? I thought he’d made the decisions.”

“I gather it dawned on him that he should run them by his consultant,” her grandfather said, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. “How exactly did you get hired on in that capacity?”

She grinned at him. “I was very clever about it. You would have been proud. I suppose for the exorbitant salary I intend to talk him into, I’d best get over there.” She met Nell’s gaze. “You’ll be training the new cook starting tomorrow?”

Nell nodded. “I hope to goodness he comes to us with more experience than my grandson. Not that I would ever say this to Luke, but he was the closest I’ve ever seen to hopeless. I thought for sure I was going to wind up with a full-time job at my age.”

Moira chuckled because Nell almost looked as if she regretted that it wasn’t going to turn out exactly that way. “Well, he’ll obviously need the both of us, if he’s to make a success of his place.”

“And though Thursday’s a test run for family and a party, I’ve promised to help with the cash register for the official Friday opening, since we expect the place to be mobbed,” Dillon said, looking pleased to have been asked. That had been Moira’s suggestion, after explaining to Luke that he’d need to be spending his time with the customers, not counting out change as he might on a regular night.

“It’s all coming together quite nicely,” Nell said. “I predict that O’Brien’s will be a huge success.”

“From your mouth to God’s ear,” Moira said.

Because if anything went wrong, she couldn’t imagine how Luke would cope with it. He was counting on the pub to measure his worth. She could have told him there were other, far more important measures, but he’d never take her word for it. He needed this success in ways she was just beginning to fully understand as she faced the decisions that would ultimately determine her own destiny.

16

L
uke had been over his pages of lists at least a dozen times by late afternoon on Thursday. Every item had been checked off and rechecked. The aromas in the kitchen reminded him of Gram’s, and he knew for a fact that the dishes tasted just the way they were supposed to. The bar was stocked. The tables and chairs were where they were meant to be. The waitstaff had all been here early, listening intently to Moira’s suggestions. It should have put his mind at ease, but so far he felt only a terrible churning in his stomach.

“What can I do to help?” Moira asked, standing behind his chair to massage his shoulders, which were knotted with tension.

“Nothing,” he said, wanting only to get through his momentary panic on his own. This was
his
pub,
his
success or failure. He’d never had so much at stake before in his life.

“Everyone’s ready,” she said, obviously trying to soothe him. “You’ve hired an excellent waitstaff. They’re all reasonably experienced and more than eager for this place to do well. They’ll provide just the right combination of energy and solicitous service.”

“I know that,” he said. “I don’t need a pep talk, Moira.”

She frowned at his impatient words. “I’m just trying to help, Luke.”

Regretting that he’d snapped at her, he touched her hand. “I know that, but all I need is for the doors to open and for this night to get started. I’ll calm down then.” Another stab of panic knifed through him. “Did the band get here? They were lost on some country road an hour ago when they called for directions.”

She smiled and motioned for him to listen. “Can’t you hear them tuning up?”

“And the setup is okay for them? I should go out there. Make sure everything’s the way they want it.”

Pressure on his shoulders kept him in place. “I’ve already checked,” Moira reassured him. “They have everything they need. The sound check has gone off without a hitch. I promise you, Luke, it’s all good. Would you like me to bring you a drink? It might steady your nerves.”

He shook his head. Taking a drink now would send him off on a dangerous path. He’d never been especially tempted by alcohol, but he didn’t want to chance turning to drink to get through a bad case of nerves. It was far too easy to go from an occasional excuse to a nasty habit. He’d seen too much of it at college, had lost a friend to it after a party had gotten wildly out of hand and the friend had tried to drive home drunk. He’d hit a tree and died at the scene. Luke had found his twisted car just moments after the accident. He still shuddered when he thought of it. Now, as the owner of a pub, he’d vowed that no one would leave here with car keys in hand if they’d had too much to drink. Not ever. Law or not, he took it as a personal responsibility.

He forced himself to shake off the memory from that long-ago tragedy, which was easier when he heard Moira’s next attempt to quiet his worries.

“We could run to your place for a quick tumble in your bed,” she suggested, at least half-seriously judging from the glint in her eyes. “There’s time enough.”

He laughed at last. “Since when has a few minutes ever been enough for us?” he asked. “But thanks for the incredibly tempting offer. If anything could distract me right now, that could.”

She smiled, though he sensed that she was trying to mask a hint of disappointment.

“There’s nothing I can do, then?” she inquired plaintively.

“Nothing except to run for your life, so I don’t wind up snapping your head off when I don’t mean to.”

She nodded. “Okay, then. I’ll be out front if you think of anything I can do to help.”

After she’d left his office with unmistakable reluctance, he felt awful for banishing her, but he knew he needed to face tonight alone. This was his life on the line, his future.

How could Moira possibly understand what it meant to him to prove himself? Only one other O’Brien had ever failed spectacularly, and that was Bree. She’d more than made up for it now, both with her business and her theater, but it had taken her a long time to get past feeling like a failure when she’d come back from Chicago after a play of hers had bombed with the critics. And she was a woman. It was, he thought, worse for a man, though he could think of a few O’Brien women who’d chop off his most valued parts for suggesting such a thing.

He drew in a deep breath, then set his clipboard down on his desk. That wasn’t going to save him now. Murmuring a little prayer under his breath, he opened the door and went out to face whatever the night would bring. At least, he told himself, he’d be surrounded tonight by a horde of friendly O’Briens.

Even though this was Luke’s big night, Moira was a nervous wreck on her own behalf as well. Not only was she going to be taking photos and trying to pitch in with the waitstaff or wherever else she might be needed, but she would be on display as Luke’s girlfriend. It was one thing to have his family’s approval, but now she had to impress the elite in this tight-knit community. Having Luke reject her earlier attempts to bolster his spirits hadn’t helped with her sudden flood of insecurities.

It was Jess who found her hovering in a dark corner of the pub before the doors opened, doing her best to stay out of Luke’s way. He’d spent the day stressed and irritable and she’d been his handy target. Since her usual style would be to fight back, it was smarter to steer clear until his nerves settled. She was proud of the fact that she’d gotten out of his office as requested, rather than staying to remind him that they were supposed to be a team.

“Why are you hiding over here?” Jess asked. “You and Luke haven’t had a fight, have you?”

“No, but he’s looking after a million-and-one details. Rather than letting me help, I seem to annoy him by asking what I can do.” She shrugged. “So I’ve done whatever I’ve noticed that needs to be done and now I’m biding my time till the doors officially open.”

Jess laughed. “Pay no attention to Luke. That’s the O’Brien independent streak talking. Don’t take it personally. We all get a little crazed when we have something major on the line. You should have seen me the night the inn opened. I was a nervous wreck. I would have alienated a saint. He’ll calm down once the rest of the family gets here and the invited guests begin to pour in, proving that this pub was a brilliant idea.”

Moira met her gaze. “It really is going to be a huge success, isn’t it?”

“I certainly think so. And I heard the band you chose tuning up. They’re perfect for an opening night. It will set the tone and lure people into coming back anytime music’s on the schedule. No one will be able to resist such a lively atmosphere. I’m so glad he hired them for tomorrow night’s official opening, too.” She looked at Moira. “Your idea, I assume. I imagine he was worried about the expense.”

Moira grinned. “Yes, I managed to convince him that it would be shortsighted not to let the general public get its own glimpse of the atmosphere we’ll be promoting, from food and drink to music.”

“Well, they sound fantastic,” Jess said.

“That’s what Nell and I thought,” Moira said, relieved to have their vision supported.

“Why don’t we sneak over to the bar and get something to drink?” Jess suggested. “Luke’s standing over there, and despite whatever he said earlier, I think a glimpse of you might calm him about now. He’s looking a little frantic.”

“It might make more sense to open the doors and let the rest of the family pour in. They’ll calm him more than I will.”

Jess smiled. “You’ve honestly no idea of the power you have over my cousin, do you? He adores you. I have to admit that at first none of us could see it, but now that I’ve gotten to know you, I do.”

Moira chuckled at the candid comment. “You’re referring to my charming behavior when you came to my grandfather’s at Christmas. I’m surprised you didn’t have me put on a watch list to keep me out of your country.”

“And risk Luke’s hating all of us?” Jess asked. “No, we gave him credit for seeing something in you we’d missed and gave you the benefit of the doubt.”

They were almost to the bar when the door opened and a tall, willowy, blond beauty walked in as if she belonged there.

“No way!” Jess said, momentarily frozen in place.

Moira stilled beside her. “Who is it?” she asked, though if memory served her correctly, she thought she already knew.

“Kristen Lewis. And trust me when I say she does not belong here. She can’t possibly have been on the guest list.”

Jess was obviously about to bolt in her direction, but Luke got there first. To Moira’s relief, he didn’t look any happier about Kristen’s arrival than Jess had. Putting a soothing hand on Jess’s arm, she said, “Maybe we should join them, but only if you can keep your temper in check. Let’s not start out the night with a scene, if one can be avoided.”

“I wouldn’t count on that,” Jess muttered. “But we are definitely going to join them, if only long enough to kick her sorry butt right back out the door. She needs to be gone before Susie and Mack get here.”

To be honest, Moira was less concerned about Susie’s reaction than she was about whatever hold this woman might still have on Luke. She was gorgeous and clearly predatory. Moira had recognized the type instantly. She’d met her share of them over the years, clinging possessively to men in the pubs where she worked. Often they were staking a claim to perfect strangers, men they’d stumbled into and were determined to hold, if only for the night.

As she and Jess neared, Moira heard Luke quietly trying to reason with her and Kristen just as stubbornly resisting his suggestion that she leave.

Suddenly feeling fiercely protective of her own turf, Moira slipped her arm through Luke’s and beamed at Kristen. “I don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Moira.”

“Ah, the Irish holy terror,” Kristen said, her expression smug.

After all her advice to Jess about behaving civilly, Moira found she was barely able to hold on to her own temper, even as Luke stepped in with a sharp warning.

“Enough, Kristen!” he commanded. “Please don’t make this any more awkward. There was a reason you weren’t on tonight’s guest list, and I’m certain you know exactly what it was.”

Kristen gave him a defiant look. “Is this really about poor Susie?” she inquired, then turned her arch gaze on Moira. “Or don’t you want your little friend here to know just how close we are?”

Even before Moira or Luke could reply to that, Jess inserted herself into the middle of the fray. She latched onto Kristen’s arm with a white-knuckled grip that was likely to leave bruises. “Say good-night, Kristen,” she ordered in a low tone. When Luke opened his mouth to intercede, Jess gave him a hard look. “I’ve got this. Do some fence-mending. Now!” she added emphatically.

She steered Kristen toward the door at a pace that had her stumbling in her very high heels.

“Lovely woman,” Moira commented lightly.

Luke turned to her with an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. She was deliberately taunting you. It’s what she does. She’s angry with me and she enjoys stirring up trouble. It’s an ugly combination.”

“She can only cause real trouble if there’s some truth to what she says.” She leveled a look into his eyes. “Is there, Luke? Is something still going on between the two of you? Have I somehow missed the signs that it’s not entirely over? It would certainly explain why you don’t seem willing to take the next step with me.”

“Absolutely not,” he swore. “I’ve broken it off.”

“When?” she asked. “In Ireland, before she left after that new year’s visit? Before we got together?”

His hesitation was all she needed to figure out the truth. “More recently, then,” she concluded wearily. “Was it going on until the day I arrived, then? Did my unexpected appearance put a crimp in the romance?”

“No, absolutely not,” he repeated. “And it was over in Ireland, I swear it. I just didn’t tell her point-blank until I got back here.”

“After sleeping with her how many times?”

The question clearly rattled him. “Could we hold off on this discussion until later?” he pleaded. “People are starting to arrive. We shouldn’t be fighting.”

“Yes, that would make this an inconvenient time, wouldn’t it?” she said quietly. “Later, then.”

She turned and walked away.

“Moira, wait.”

Fortunately for her, people were indeed surging into the pub. The band began playing. Guinness was being poured at a record clip and the noise level was almost enough to drown out all the voices in her head telling her that on the biggest night of Luke’s life, she’d lost the one thing that truly mattered to her…her faith in what they were building together.

There was no question that the night had been a rousing success. Luke knew that from the laughter and conversation that flowed easily around the room, from the people who came and stayed on rather than leaving after offering a few polite comments. Positive remarks were directed his way not just from his own family, but from all the invited guests who’d dropped by to wish him well and lingered for the party atmosphere.

The band was a huge hit as well. As his father had suggested, the locals must have considered themselves in some part Irish, because they seemed familiar with most of the lyrics and sang along lustily to all the traditional songs.

Over the course of the evening he’d caught barely more than a glimpse of Moira. He knew Kristen’s comments had hurt her, just as they’d been designed to do. His inability to defend himself against what she’d implied had made it worse. After weeks of looking forward to this opening, now he only wanted for it to be over so he could find Moira and mend fences with her. They should be celebrating together, but it seemed they were further apart than ever.