The Tax Inspector (27 page)

52

Jack Catchprice was scared and amazed by what he had brought off. The thing happened so fast. Really, he was just enquiring – could he do it? He was testing his strength – did he know the guy who knew the guy? Did he have the clout with the first guy to get him to use his clout with the second guy? Did he have enough in the favour bank to get this investigation stopped? The truth was – he was flirting with it. But then he was in the deep end and suddenly he was in a very dark place and it was, like, you want it or not, yes or no, shit or get off the can. ‘Sure,’ he said. What the fuck else could he say?

Thirty minutes after she left the Bilgola house, without her knowing anything had changed, Catchprice Motors was no longer a part of Maria Takis’s professional life.

Jack had not been able to achieve it in two steps, but in three, and the steps were dirty and the connections dangerous. He was now joined to things he would rather not be joined to.

He wanted to ring Maria, straightaway, and tell her what he had done. But it was like ringing to check that a dozen long-stemmed roses had arrived – you could not do it. You had to wait to be thanked.

For Jack who had made his impatience into something like a professional virtue, waiting was difficult. But he did it. He had no choice. He told Bea he would take any calls from Maria Takis, and any call from any female who did not seem inclined to give a name.

He had a meeting with the dopey architect who had wilfully ignored his brief and now wanted to give the Circular Quay land to the city for a park in return for the right to put two towers in the water where the ferries came in. It was like a giant π, a gateway to the city with a ballroom, a fucking
ballroom
, across the top. It was wrong to call him dopey. The guy was right in everything he said. He was trying to make a proper gateway for the city. He said the Cahill Expressway was like the Berlin Wall. He was a fucking genius, but he did not see that Jack could not
sell
a ballroom, and he did not have the resources to fight ten years to build in the water at Circular Quay. But he could not bear a gifted man like this to dislike him – he asked him to take his drawings to another stage.

After that, he called all the troops in for the Lend Lease meeting – three hours later than scheduled but Lend Lease still bought the whole Woolloomooloo package and when they went out of the door he opened a couple of magnums of Moët for the staff to celebrate.

There was still no call. He started to worry the connection had fucked up, that the case had not been stopped. He went back into his office. He picked up the phone, put it down, picked it up, put it down again.

Then he buzzed Bea and had her book a table for two at Darcy’s for that evening, just in case.

‘You’re not going to Darcy’s,’ Bea said. ‘You’ve got dinner at Corky Missenden’s.’

‘Then I’ll cancel Corky. Get me Corky.’

‘Good luck,’ Bea said.

But of course there was no way Corky was going to excuse him.

‘All right,’ Jack said. ‘Well, if I have to come, I’m going to have to bring someone.’

‘Jack, don’t do this to me.’

‘Corky, I don’t want to. I have to.’

‘You’re a shit, Jack. This dinner has been planned for weeks. You don’t know what a tricky placement this is. Who is this person? Is she anyone I know? Does she
do
anything?’

Jack thought it best not to reveal her occupation. ‘You’ll like her,’ he said, ‘she’s a friend of Daniel Makeveitch. You’ll love her.’

But there was still no call from Maria.

Jack was tight and twitchy in the legs and at the back of his fingers. He had lunch at Beppi’s with Larry Auerbach and took his cellular phone to the table like some nerd from the Parramatta Road. When Larry went for a piss, he rang Catchprice Motors, but the phone wasn’t even answered.

At three he got the Taxation Office but her number did not answer either, and the switchboard said she was unavailable.

At four, now in his office, he telephoned Maria’s home and got the answerphone.

‘Hey, Maria. You there? It’s Jack … Catchprice … I just had a crazy idea,’ he said. ‘It might be fun.’

She picked up.

He stood up and pulled the phone off his desk. ‘You’re there.’

‘If it’s fun, I’m up for it.’

‘Are you O.K.? I worried you had gone into labour.’

‘My fingers look like sausages,’ she said, ‘and I’ve had my worst day all year …’

‘Nothing good happen at all? All day?’

‘Not a thing.’

‘Are you absolutely sure?’

‘Did my legs look sort of funny last night? Were my knees puffy?’

‘No!’

‘Are you sure? Because if they looked like they do right now, I’m going to die of embarrassment.’

‘Maria, you’ve got great legs. What happened that was so bad?’

‘Something very shitty. I don’t want to even think about it.’

‘But your investigation stopped, right?’
He had done the fucking impossible. He had fixed what she had failed to fix
. ‘You got called back to your office? Catchprice Motors is out of your life?’

Remember me? The generalist?

There was a pause. ‘Jack, how do you know this?’

‘How do you think?’ he said.
I did the fucking impossible for you. I crawled down sewers. I shook hands with rats
. ‘How would you reckon?’

‘Oh, your mother told you.’

He made a silent face.

‘Well,’ Maria said. ‘She’s pleased.’

‘Sure,’ he said, ‘you can rely on that, but I’m sorry you’re not happier.’

‘Oh, I want to have fun
now.’

He felt anxious that now she would not like him, angry that she did not appreciate what he had done for her, indignant at what he suspected were her double standards, relieved she would probably come out to dinner with him, even if it was at Corky Missenden’s.

‘You might say no when you hear – but there’s a dinner party at Rose Bay I thought you could have a good laugh at.’

‘I like the laugh part.’

‘You know this fellow Terry Digby – Lord Digby – who just paid $23 million for the de Kooning? He’s in Sydney, and there’s a dinner. It’s Corky Missenden – she’s good at this sort of thing. There’ll be money and art, mostly, but the Attorney General will be there so that might be amusing. In any case, the food should be very good and we could leave early if you were bored – you’d be a perfect excuse for me to leave.’

‘What would I wear?’ she said.

He persuaded her she could wear exactly what she wore the night before, that it would be perfect. He said it because he figured that was who she was, but also because he was not going to lose her because she had nothing suitable to wear, and when they arrived out at Rose Bay, it made Corky Missenden raise a questioning eyebrow in his direction.

He had too much on his mind to be offended by Corky’s eyebrow. He had seen that she was setting up her dinner party with two tables in two rooms, and, as he and Maria passed through the house, even as he pointed out the less embarrassing choices in Corky’s erratic art collection, Jack’s mind was racing, thinking what he could offer Corky, what he could trade her, how he could
make
her have Maria Takis sit at his table. He had Maria drink champagne. He looked at the harbour and pointed out a school of leather-jackets swimming up against the sea wall, but he had none of the lightness of heart his creased-up eyes and loose curly hair suggested – he knew that he would be sent, in a moment, to be charming to the Attorney General and Maria would be bumped into the second room with the rich and reactionary George Grissenden and the snobbish Betty Finch. He had fucked up. It was the wrong way for her to see his life.

53

At four o’clock Maria Takis had been in her one-bedroom cottage in Balmain with her puffy feet elevated, staring at the discolouration on her freshly painted ceiling. At eight-fifteen she was standing beside Sydney Harbour with a long glass flute from which very small bubbles rose slowly through straw-coloured Dom Perignon. At four o’clock she had had red eyes and a headache. At eight-fifteen waiters with black shirts and pony tails brought hors d’oeuvres to the sea wall where she sat with a man with curly blond hair and a tanned face. The light was mellow, the water of the harbour pearly, touched with pink and blue and green. It was like nothing so much as a television commercial.

That she should like the too-good-looking man, that the setting itself – terra-cotta tiled terrace, flapping striped awnings, elegant men and women in black dresses – should be actually
pleasant
was disturbing for her.

She had been in homes like this before, often, professionally, but she had never allowed herself to think of wealth as attractive, was so accustomed to seeing it as a form of theft that it was shocking for her to feel herself responding to it at all, as if she were allowing herself to be sexually excited by a criminal.

The harbour licked and lapped against the wall she sat on. It slapped against the sandstone and smelt of sea-weed. She wondered if people in these houses bothered to fish. If ever she had a house like this, she would fish. She saw her mother on the sea wall casting out towards where the water boiled with tailor.

‘I thought about you all day,’ he said.

But she was suddenly so uncomfortable with his attractiveness, his straight, perfect teeth – he was a ‘type’ she would once have labelled superficial or yuppy – that she could not bring herself to say she had thought of him – although she had, often – or even that she was pleased and excited to be here.

‘Should we be mingling?’

‘We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to do,’ he said.

But then it turned out that they must sit, not merely apart, not merely at separate tables, but at tables in rooms separated by french doors.

‘Surely we can sit together?’ she said.

‘I’ll fix it,’ Jack said, and disappeared into the house.

She stayed alone on the wall, looking out at the harbour where a long, low, wooden boat slowly putted past, no more than five metres away. A little girl, no more than ten, sat alone at the tiller. The girl waved. Maria waved back. She thought: I could handle this. That’s the truth. I would actually love to live in a house like this.

When Jack came back to admit he could not change the seating she was disappointed, but not greatly.

‘I’ve decided to enjoy myself,’ she said. She held his hand.

‘Are you sure? I’m sorry. We can leave straight after the pudding.’

When he put his hand against her stomach, she did not mind – the opposite.

‘I like it here.’ She kissed him softly on his expensive-smelling cheek and went to sit at the long dining-table in the room closest to the harbour. She found her name card, seated herself, permitted herself to take pleasure from the white linen, the Lalique bowl – she peered around the base and found the signature – even the heavy chandeliers above their heads. She was here to enjoy, not cross-examine.

A tall blond Englishman on her left introduced himself as ‘Terry’. His hair fell over his forehead in a stiff lick. He had a black cotton shirt with overlapping double collars which she noticed straightaway. Later she intended to ask him where he bought it.

‘Are you the de Kooning man?’ she asked.

‘Well, not the de Kooning woman,’ he said, smiling.

‘Well, I’m grateful for that,’ Maria said, also smiling.

‘Oh,’ he said, pushing his lick of hair away, ‘you’re not fond of them?’

‘He’s such an extraordinary painter,’ she said. She was pleased to be here. Tax Department people never talked about painting. Alistair was an educated man, but he would barely have known who de Kooning was. ‘I love his work, but the women always frighten me.’

This made the man smile at the edges of his mouth. His eyes became thoughtful.

‘Seen the butter?’ he asked.

Maria looked for the butter, but could see none. ‘He’s so lyrical and beautiful,’ she said. ‘I mean, it’s like I’m giving my heart to him and then I walk into the next room and feel I’m in the power of a serial killer. I mean, is he Ted Bundy?’

The man turned towards a puffy-faced dark-haired woman on the other side of the table. Maria imagined he was going to ask for butter. Instead he said: ‘Janice, I was very impressed by your piece on our mutual friend, although I really do think you could have taken the matter even further.’

Maria saw she had been cut. She thought: how could you be so unkind to someone who was a stranger and not at home?

She looked across the table towards a man and woman engaged in conversation. The table was very wide. The conversation seemed too far away to enter. The woman was in her early fifties with large eyes and a way of listening that must have been most flattering to the man, who was short and smooth and shaved so close his red cheeks shone like soup bones.

‘The thing I object to,’ the man said, ‘is to pay my taxes, fine, but not to subsidize some bored housewife so she can be pleasured by a doctor.’

It was a moment before she understood his use of ‘pleasured’. He meant a vaginal examination. Maria looked at his listener who was studiously brushing toast crumbs off the table cloth.
You hate him surely. You are nodding your head while you despise him
.

‘I agree, I agree,’ she said. ‘I like the American system.’

‘No one ever goes to the doctor in the States just because they’re bored.’

‘My God, no.’

‘But these women are bored,’ the man with glistening cheeks said. ‘Probably hubby is ignoring them. So they go along to good old Doctor-of-your-choice with their little green and yellow Medicare card.’

When Alistair was running the department it had been flexible enough to accommodate the passions Maria Takis now felt. (You wrote down a Rolls-Royce number plate and checked it out. You saw a lot of marble on a building site, it was enough.) She would have taken pleasure wringing the tax out of the complacent little gynophobe. Indeed, she might yet do it, or have someone do it for her. She looked across the table trying to read his place card upside down.

‘I think you’re absolutely correct about the de Kooning women,’ the man on her right said. ‘I never knew how to take them either.’

He introduced himself, but she already knew who he was. She knew his paintings and admired them. She responded to their spareness, their austerity, their refusal ever to be pretty. They did not mesh with the face, which was rather pudgy, and pasty, but rather with the flinty light in his small grey eyes. The colour clung to the canvas like crushed gravel, and it was through them that Maria had learned to love the Australian landscape which she still saw, everywhere, in their terms. It was exhilarating to be in agreement with Phillip Passos about de Kooning.

‘Did he buy a “Woman”?’ she whispered. ‘I feel such a fool. I’ve insulted him.’

‘Him? He’s not Digby.’ Passos was breaking his bread roll with his shockingly small white hands.

‘Then who is it?’

‘No one to worry about. Digby’s in there, at the Big Table. He bought a rather nice abstract piece from the early fifties. Not “pivotal”,’ he smiled, ‘but “major”. He paid $23 million for it.’

‘I heard.’

‘Well, he thought he had a bargain, because the market is so soft, but now he’s in a panic because maybe the market is still falling and he’s got to decide whether he has to bid for the next de Kooning. And that’s a “pivotal” one. Sotheby’s auction it in New York next week. He’ll have to be over there to prop up his own investment.’

‘I wonder what de Kooning thinks of all this.’

‘Not much. He has Alzheimer’s, I believe.’

‘Well he should be benefiting somehow.’

‘Mmmm,’ said Passos, looking a little vague.

‘Doesn’t France have something like this? A Droit de Suite? Don’t French artists now get a cut on all future sales of their work?’

Passos cut his smoked salmon carefully. ‘What do you do?’ he asked.

‘Oh, just a public servant,’ she said, and was disappointed and relieved to see she had satisfied his curiosity.

‘You know what this dinner party is about, do you?’

‘The de Kooning man.’

‘Nah,’ said Passos. ‘He’s just a bowl of fruit on the table. He’s a
nature morte
. He’s a thing you arrange other things around. The hidden agenda is Droit de Suite.’

‘Oh, you’re lobbying? Now?’

‘The Attorney General wants artists to love him, and so he introduced this Droit de Suite legislation. Now he’s hurt because we don’t want it.’

‘I would have thought it was great for artists.’

‘So did he. So did I. But if it’s going to work the art galleries have to keep honest records on how much people paid for paintings.’

Maria was already acting like a spy. ‘Oh,’ she said, ‘so is that a problem?’

‘Not if you pay tax. But they don’t. They pay cash. Over half of it is funny money. So what the commercial galleries are saying to the government is Droit de Suite is too complicated to administer, and what they’re saying to their artists is that over half our collectors will just stop collecting once the Tax Department can check on what is really going on. I can see I’ve disappointed you.’

‘No, really. It’s fascinating. Really.’

‘Well, you know, we took dirty money from the Medicis, so I guess we’ll take it from Jack Catchprice too.’

The smoked salmon on Maria’s plate was subtle and flavoursome, and it became, as she separated it from itself on her plate, not like a fish, but something at once alive and abstract, which had been bred for the pleasure of the connoisseur and about whose death she would be wise not to enquire too closely.