The Texan and the Lady (26 page)

AUSTIN COULDN’T FORCE himself to stay for the wedding. He’d heard some insane reasons for marrying, but to insure where you were going to be laid to rest hit the top of the list.

The night had turned cold, but he didn’t notice. He walked the streets of Florence, wishing he were back in Texas. Things always seemed simpler there. He was more at home among the longhorns and the sagebrush. A person didn’t feel as lonely, maybe because the land itself was lonely.

“Want me to walk with you, Marshal?” True fell into step as Austin turned the corner of the depot. “I saw you from the window of the hotel when you passed and figured I’d tag along just in case you got into trouble.”

Austin couldn’t help but smile. “Where’s that sidekick of yours—Henry?”

True shrugged. “I figure his was one of the families who left. The town’s quieter than a whorehouse on Sunday morning.”

Laughing, Austin wondered where True had lived before here. Now that he knew Jennie couldn’t be the child’s mother, he wanted, like everyone else it seemed, to keep an eye on True.

“You ever kill a man?” True asked before Austin had time to finish laughing.

Austin nodded. “When I had to.”

True’s huge eyes danced with excitement. “I got a little time for you to tell me about it.”

The marshal shook his head. “There’s nothing worth telling about watching a man die.”

“Still, you must be awful brave. I’ll bet you’re about the bravest man who ever rode across the West.”

“No, son,” Austin answered. “I was just doing my job.”

True looked disappointed.

“But you’ve got a grand turn for words,” Austin added. “Maybe you’ll grow up to be a writer.”

The child laughed. “I can’t even read yet. Jennie makes me try every time she gets her hands on me, but she keeps changing the words she wants me to learn. I was thinking I’d be a marshal like you and not ever have to worry about nothing but keeping my guns clean. I’d kill so many outlaws they’d name a cemetery after me, True’s Cemetery.”

“Who knows?” Austin couldn’t imagine the child ever being anything but wild and free.

They returned to the hotel after circling the depot. Austin lifted True up on the porch. “It’s a little cold. Why don’t you turn in, son?”

Giving his suggestion some thought, True yawned. “You sure you don’t need me to help?”

“Not tonight, but you can tell Link I need to see him at first light in the morning.”

True saluted and vanished.

Austin smiled, knowing Link would have True for a shadow when he appeared in the morning. The marshal leaned against the porch railing and pulled out a cigar. It had been a long day and seemed like a million years since he’d held Jennie in the predawn light.

As though his thoughts took shape, she stepped onto the porch. Her eyes looked tired even in the moonlight, but she still held herself as straight and tall as ever.

“Evening,” she whispered as she moved a foot away from him. For a few minutes they both seemed happy just to be in each other’s presence.

Finally she faced him. “We need to talk.”

Austin could hear the rapids coming. He fought the urge to yell “White water” and jump off the porch before she could go any further.

“I’ve thought all day about last night. What happened between us was—”

“Beautiful,” Austin finished her sentence. “Magic. Wonderful.”

“Unreal,” Jennie answered. “I’ve always thought I wouldn’t allow a man to touch me unless I was sure he loved me.” She waited, as if giving Austin the chance to reply.

But he couldn’t answer. He’d never said the words. Maybe he did care for her more than he’d ever cared for a woman, but to love her would be opening himself up to be hurt again. He’d loved his mother. He’d loved his brother. They were dead. He wasn’t sure he could survive another love in his life. Why couldn’t she be like the few other women he’d found comfort with? Why couldn’t he just walk away from her before either of them was hurt?

Tossing the unused cigar away, Austin shoved his hands into his pockets. “Love’s something for poets and romantics.” Suddenly, for no good reason at all, he wanted her to feel as uncomfortable as he did. “Now, honesty is a trait worth looking for. If a man and woman can be honest with one another, then they’ve something to build on.”

Jennie’s eyes shone with tears. “I think we have nothing more to say to one another, Marshal McCormick.”

“No,” Austin agreed and watched her leave. When he’d heard the door close, he added, “Except that I’ll miss you every day for the rest of my life.”

Only the wind and a small child listening at the window above heard his statement.

Chapter 24

I
don’t understand. By all rhyme and reason you should be food for the worms by now.” Audrey spread another quilt over Colton’s bed. “Granny Gates would have made you spit three times in an open grave for the trick you played on death.”

“Sorry to let you down,” Colton grumbled, “but other than feeling like I swallowed a handful of lead, I’m doing pretty good.”

“Oh, I’m not sorry, just surprised. Three days ago I wouldn’t have given you a hare’s chance in a buffalo stampede, but now I’m beginning to think, thanks to you, my calling is doctoring. I keep changing the bandage expecting to see fresh blood, but you’ve decided to keep what little you have left.”

“Since I’m doing so grand, how about sending up something besides broth?” Colton’s words still had an edge to them, as if he were giving an order, not making a request. “A rare steak with a half dozen eggs on the side sounds like a fair follow-up to that bowl of soup you called supper.”

Audrey wasn’t ruffled by his gruffness. “You’ll have nothing but broth until I say you can eat more.” She diluted her order with a smile. “Now, get down in those covers. We’ve got a norther blowing in that promises snow before nightfall, and, even with the quilts, I doubt you’ve got enough blood to keep you warm. If you survive the night, I’ll give some thought to oatmeal in the morning.”

Colton closed his eyes and growled at her suggestion. In truth he’d felt chilled all day as the temperature had been dropping. He knew it was more thanks to his blood loss than the weather, but he’d fight it alone. The girls here had enough to keep them busy without having to worry about one gut-shot rancher feeling cold.

As Audrey said good night and left the room, he heard his wife enter and take her seat by his bed. He hadn’t been too ill to notice she ate little more than broth. Even that seemed to make her sick from time to time. He tried to remember the color of her eyes, but couldn’t. In all honesty he’d never looked at her closely before he’d been shot, denying himself a passing pleasure so that he wouldn’t miss her when he sent her away.

He’d been a fool to ask a woman to travel all the way to Kansas in hopes of marrying him. What did he have to offer her but widowhood? If the bullet hadn’t found him three days ago, it would have before the year was out.

“Colton?” Delta whispered. “Are you awake?”

He slowly opened his eyes and stared at her. Sky blue, he thought. How could he have forgotten that her eyes were sky blue? Just as she had the nights before, she’d left the room to change into a cotton gown and robe. He had no idea why she changed. She spent the night, as she spent the days, sitting in the chair between him and the window.

She looked so fragile, like a sudden gust might blow her away. But he’d seen her inner strength these past few days. Like a true wife, she’d been there whenever needed. She made decisions quickly yet never said a harsh word, even though he knew she had to be exhausted. He looked at her closely for the first time, remembering how she’d cried when she thought they were alone and he was asleep. “I’m awake.” He tried to force the edge out of his voice. “How are you, Mrs. Barkley?” he asked, even though he knew she wouldn’t tell him if she were ill.

Delta smiled shyly. “Fine,” she answered. “Or I will be as soon as I warm up. With the sun setting, all warmth seems to have vanished from the world. The house is packed with folks asking for more blankets.”

“Are you sorry I haven’t died yet and left you a widow?” He knew she hadn’t married him out of any love, and he’d already guessed his land wasn’t the card that had won her. She had her reasons, just as he had his, and she might tell him if there was enough time shared between them.

“No,” she replied. “I’m getting used to having you around. I’d miss you if you died on me now.”

“You know, I’d miss you, too,” Colton added honestly. He’d decided years ago that he preferred being alone, but he didn’t mind her nearness.

The wind rattled against the windows already white with frost. Delta glanced at the open space the curtains didn’t cover and hugged herself. She could feel the storm blowing across the country.

“Take the quilt Audrey brought,” Colton ordered as he tried to lift it off his legs. “You’ll freeze tonight sitting in that chair.”

“No!” Delta jumped to straighten his covers. “I couldn’t. You’ll need it.”

Colton leaned back among the pillows, frustrated that he wasn’t strong enough to force her to accept. How could he rest easy in a bed when she was shivering at his side?

Delta tucked the covers around him, her wide blue eyes filled with worry. “Please,” she said, “you’ve got to stay warm.” This night promised to be hard on the healthy. “The last thing I want is for you to catch pneumonia.”

“I can’t lie here with you cold. Leave me. Go find a warm bed among the girls’ quarters.”

“No.” Delta’s voice was low, but firm. “I belong here with my husband.” She didn’t add that she felt safe here even though he was wounded. Delta had no faith in Jennie’s belief that Ward was gone. She knew he’d be back for the deed or to make sure she was dead and buried.

Colton opened the covers at his side. “Then lay beside me and we’ll both be warm.”

Fear hit Delta like an icy slap. She’d seen her stepbrother make the same gesture, and she’d been beaten when she hadn’t joined him. Backing against the wall, she raised her hands as if to ward off another blow. “No!” she cried, trying to push herself into the very wall.

Colton took one look at her face and would have given all he owned to be able to take back the words. He’d only voiced an option, but in his usual way his words had come out too harsh. She stared down at him with a terror unlike any he’d ever seen.

“Mary Elizabeth?” he questioned, hating himself for having frightened her so. “It was only a suggestion for warmth, nothing more. Mary Elizabeth!” He realized she wasn’t hearing him. “Mary!” Even the sound of her own name didn’t shake her.

He leaned back against the pillows, wishing he had the strength to stand and pull her back to reality, but knowing that if he touched her now, he’d probably only frighten her more. “Mary, don’t be afraid.” He rubbed his forehead in frustration.

Slowly, she forced a mask across her face and lowered her fists to her side. “Yes,” she said, seeming to pull away, even though her body remained stone still.

Colton raised his hand slowly, as one might to a wild, frightened animal. “I don’t know what crossed your mind just now, but I assure you I would not hurt you in any way even if I had the strength.”

Delta nodded, as if forcing herself to listen. “Thank you for the offer, but I’m really not that cold.”

“You act as though I asked something improper. I don’t think it’s all that unusual for a man and wife to sleep in the same bed.”

“No,” Delta reasoned.

Colton relaxed back, wishing he wasn’t so tired. “If I live, I had thought we’d be married in every way; but if you don’t wish it, I’ll not press the point. I have no illusion of you marrying me for love. There’ll be no physical side to our marriage if you wish.” He had to make her believe he would never hurt her. He felt as if he’d just slapped an angel.

He could see her body relax a fraction from a fear she must have been fretting over since the wedding. “Thank you,” she answered. “I don’t think I could live if …”

“Then I won’t touch you!” He didn’t want her to have to describe what she obviously found so ugly. “You’ll be my wife in name only if that’s what you want.” Colton couldn’t bear to see the pain returning to her face. He wondered if something terrible had happened in her past or if it was him she found so distasteful. “I swear I’ll never touch you. You still have my gun. You can shoot me—if you can find a place left undamaged to aim at.”

Delta smiled, remembering their first day together and how he’d handed her the weapon.

“That’s better.” Colton had never wanted to hold a woman so much in his life, but he didn’t make a move. “Now, will you make me a promise?”

“Yes,” Delta answered. “If I can.”

“Will you promise to crawl beneath the covers if you get cold? I swear I’ll not attack you, and sharing the bed seems our only option.”

She nodded, realizing he wasn’t even strong enough to pull on his own shirt; he could hardly overpower her.

Colton closed his eyes, wishing he knew more about this beautiful creature who was his wife. Wishing he’d live long enough to convince her he wasn’t going to harm her.

An hour later, as the storm raged outside, Colton felt the covers move on the far side of the bed. Delta slipped beneath the blankets without touching him. After several minutes he felt the warmth of her beside him and relaxed. As his breathing returned to normal, her hand slid across the sheet and touched his arm. Her fingers rested lightly just above his elbow.

He didn’t move, or cover her hand with his own as he longed to. He kept his promise. He fell asleep for the first time in years with a wife beside him and a reason to wake up in the morning.

JENNIE HELPED THE late crew wash up because she was restless. Snow already covered the ground, convincing those passengers who’d arrived on the afternoon train to spend the night and take a look at the weather come morning.

As she put the serving dishes up along the top shelves, she couldn’t get Austin’s last words from her mind. They’d only known each other a little while. How she wished she could go back and change everything they’d said from the beginning. How she wished she could tell him the truth.