the boy's hand like a moth as Danat threw open the shutters and let the
morning light spill in. Otah blinked, yawned, and frowned. Dreams
already half-remembered were fading quickly. Danat dropped onto the foot
of Otah's cot.
"I've found them," Danat said.
Otah sat up, taking a pose that asked explanation. Danat held out the
paper. The handwriting was unfamiliar to him, the characters wider than
standard and softly drawn. He took the page and rubbed his eyes as if to
clear them.
"I was sleeping in one of the side rooms," Danat said. "When I woke up
this morning, I saw that. It was in a corner, not even hidden. I don't
know how I missed it last night, except it was dark and I was tired."
Otah's eyes able now to focus, his mind more fully awake, he turned his
attention to the letter.
Ashti-cha-
Me have decided to leave. Eiah says that Maati-kvo isn't
well, so we're all going to Utani so that she can get help
caring for him. Please, if you get this, you have to come
back! Uanjit is just as bad as ever, and I'm afraid without
you here to put her in her place, she'll only get worse.
Small Kae has started having nightmares about her. And the
baby! You should see the way it tries to get away. It
slipped into my lap last night after the Great Poet had gone
to sleep and curled up like a kitten.
They've almost finished loading the cart. I'm going to sneak
back in once we're almost under way so that she won't find
it. You have to come back! Meet us in Utani as soon as you can.
The letter was signed Irit Laatani. Otah folded the paper and tapped it
against his lips, thinking. It was plausible. It could be a trick to
send them off to Utani, but that would mean that they knew where Otah
and his party were, and the errand they were on. If that was the case,
there was no reason for misleading them. Vanjit and her little Blindness
could stop any pursuit if she wanted it. Danat coughed expectantly.
"Utani," Otah said. "They're going north, just the way you'd planned.
This is where you tell me how clever you were for heading there at the
first?"
Danat laughed, shaking his head.
"You were right, Papa-kya. Coming here was the right thing. If Maati
wasn't ill, they'd have been here."
"Still. It does mean they've stopped hiding. That's a risk if they've
only got one poet."
Danat took a questioning pose.
"This poet," Otah said. "She's their protection and their power. As long
as she has the andat in her control, they think that they're safe. In
truth, though, she can only defend against things she knows. As long as
there is only one poet, a well-placed man with a bow could end her
before she could blind him. And then none of them are defended."
"Unless there's a second binding. Another andat," Danat said, and Otah
took a confirming pose. Danat frowned. "But if there had been, then Irit
would have said so, wouldn't she? If Eiah had managed to capture Wounded?"
"I'd expect her to, yes," Otah said.
"Then why would they go?"
Otah tapped the letter.
"Just what the woman said. Because Maati's ill," he said. "And because
Eiah decided that caring for him was worth the risk. If he's bad enough
to need other physicians' help, they may well be going slowly. Keeping
him rested."
"So we go," Danat said. "We go now, and as fast as we can manage. And
attack the poet before she can blind us."
"Yes," Otah said. "Burn the books, stop them from binding the andat. Go
back, and try to put the world back together again."
"Only ... only then how do we fix the people in Galt? How do we cure Ana?"
"There's a decision to make," Otah said. "Doing this quickly and well
means letting Galt remain sightless."
"Then we can't kill the poet," Danat said.
Otah took a long breath.
"Think about that before you say it," he said. "This is likely the only
chance we'll have to take them by surprise. The Galts in Saraykeht are
safe enough. The ones in their own cities are likely dead already. The
others could be sacrificed, and it would keep us alive."
"And childless, so what would the advantage be?" Danat said. "Everything
you'd tried to do would be destroyed."
"Everything I wanted to do has already been destroyed," Otah said.
"There isn't a solution to this. Not anymore. I'm reduced to looking for
the least painful way that it can end. I don't see how we take these
pieces and make a world worth living in."
Danat was silent and still, then took Otah's hand.
"I can," Danat said. "There's hope. There's still hope."
"This poet? Everything Ashti Beg says paints her as angry and petty and
cruel at heart. She hates the Galts and thinks little enough of me.
That's the woman we would be trying to reason with. And if she chooses,
there is more than Galt to lose."
Danat took a pose that accepted the stakes like a man at a betting
table. He would put the world and everything in it at risk for the
chance that remained to save Ana's home. Otah hesitated, and then
replied with a pose that stood witness to the decision. A feeling of
pride warmed him.
Kiyan-kya, he thought, we have raised a good man. Please all the gods
that we've also raised a wise one.
"I'll go tell the others," Danat said.
He rose and walked for the door, pausing only when Otah called after
him. Danat, at the doorway, looked back.
"It's the right choice," Otah said. "No matter how poorly this happens,
you made the right choice."
"There wasn't an option," Danat said.
It had been clear enough that no matter what the next step was, it
wouldn't involve staying at the school. Under Idaan's direction, the
armsmen were already refilling the water and coal stores for the
steamcarts, packing what little equipment they had used, and preparing
themselves for the road. The sky was white where it wasn't gray, the
snow blurring the horizon. Ashti Beg sat alone beside the great bronze
doors that had once opened only for the Dai-kvo. They were stained with
verdigris and stood ajar. No one besides Otah saw the significance of it.
Midmorning saw a thinning of the clouds, a weak, pale blue forcing its
way through the very top of the sky's dome. The horses were in harness,
the carts showing their billows of mixed smoke and steam, and everything
was at the ready except Idaan and Ana. The armsmen waited, ready to
leave. Otah and Danat went back.
Otah found the pair in a large room. Ana, sitting on an ancient bench,
had bent forward. Tears streaked the girl's cheeks, her hair was a wild
tangle, and her hands clasped until the fingertips were red and the
knuckles white. Idaan stood beside her, arms crossed and eyes as bleak
as murder. Before Otah could announce himself, Idaan saw him. His sister
leaned close to the Galtic girl, murmured something, listened to the
soft reply, and then marched to the doorway and Otah's side.
"Is there ... is something the matter?" Otah asked.
"Of course there is. How long have you been traveling with that girl?"
"Since Saraykeht," Otah said.
"Have you noticed yet that she isn't a man?" Idaan's voice was sharp as
knives. "Tell the armsmen to stand down. Then bring me a bowl of snow."
"What's the matter?" Otah demanded. And then, "Is it her time of the
month? Does she need medicine?"
Idaan looked at him as if he had asked what season came after spring:
pitying, incredulous, disgusted.
"Get me some snow. Or, better, some ice. Tell your men that we'll be
ready in a hand and a half, and for all the gods there ever were, keep
your son away from her until we can put her back together. The last
thing she needs is to feel humiliated."
Otah took a pose that promised compliance, but then hesitated. Idaan's
dark eyes flashed with something that wasn't anger. When she spoke, her
voice was lower but no softer.
"How have you spent a lifetime in the company of women and learned
nothing?" she asked, and, shaking her head, turned back to Ana.
True to her word, a hand and a half later, Ana and Idaan emerged from
the school as if nothing strange had happened. Ana's outer robe was
changed to a dark wool, and she leaned on Idaan's arm as she stepped up
to the bed of the steamcart. Danat moved forward, but Idaan's scowl
drove him back. The two women made their slow way to the shed, where
Idaan closed the door behind them.
The men steering the carts called out to one another, voices carrying
like crows' calls in the empty landscape. The carts stuttered and
lurched, and turned to the east, tracking back along the path to the
high road between ruined Nantani and Pathai, from which they'd come.
Otah rode down the path he'd walked as a boy, searching his mind for
some feeling of kinship with his past, but the world as it was demanded
too much of him. He searched for some memory deep within him of the
first time he'd walked away from the school, of leaving everything he'd
known, rejected, behind him.
His mind was knotted with questions of how to find the poet, how to
persuade her to do as he asked, what Idaan had meant, what was wrong
with Ana, whether the steamcarts had enough fuel, and a growing ache in
his spine that came from too many days riding horses he didn't know.
There was no effort to spare for the past. Whatever he didn't remember
now of his original flight from the school he likely never would. The
past would be lost, as it always was. Always. He didn't bother trying to
hold it.
They made better time than he had expected, starting as late as they
had. By the time they stopped for the night, the high road was behind
them. The fastest route to Utani would be overland to the Qiit, then by
boat up the river. Any hope they had of overtaking Maati and Eiah would
come on the roads, where the steamcarts gave Otah an advantage. They
would have to sleep in the open more than if they had kept to wider
roads, and the rough terrain increased the possibility of the carts
breaking or getting stuck. Even of the boiler bursting and killing
anyone too near it. But Idaan's voice spoke in Otah's mind of the next
day, and the next, and the next, so he pushed them and himself.
Four of the armsmen rode ahead in the lowering gloom of night to scout
out the next day's path. The others prepared a simple meal of pork and
rice, Ashti Beg sitting with them and trading jokes. Danat's slow cir
cling of their camp took the name of defense but seemed more to be
avoiding the still-closed shed where Idaan and Ana rested. Otah sat
alone near the steamcart's kiln, reflecting that it was very much like
his son to shift between noble dedication in the morning and childish
pouting as night came on. He had been much the same as a young man, or
imagined that he had.
The door opened, Ana's laughter spilling out into the night. Idaan led
the girl forward, letting Ana keep a careful grip on her. Her dark eyes
and Ana's unfocused gray ones were both light and merry. Ana's hair had
been combed and braided in the style of children in the winter cities.
In the dim moonlight, it made Ana seem hardly more than a girl.
Idaan steered the girl to the cart's front and helped her sit beside
Otah. He coughed once to make sure the girl knew he was there, but she
seemed unsurprised at the sound. Idaan placed a hand on the back of the
girl's neck.
"I'll go get some food," Idaan said. "My brother here should be able to
keep you out of trouble for that long."
Ana took a pose that offered thanks. She did a creditable job of it.
Idaan snorted, patted the girl's neck, and lowered herself to the
ground. Otah heard her footsteps crushing the snow as she walked away.
"Ana-cha," Otah said. His voice was more tentative than he liked. "I
hope you're well?"
"Fine," she said. "Thank you. I'm sorry I delayed things today. It won't
happen again."
"Hardly worth thinking about," Otah said, relieved that her infirmity
had passed. Grief, he suspected, over what the poet had done to her, to
her family, her nation.
"I misjudged you," Ana said. "I know it seems like everything we do is
another round of apology, but I am sorry for it."
"It might be simpler to agree to forgive each other in advance," Otah
said, and Ana laughed. It was a warmer sound than he'd expected. A