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Authors: Janet Gurtler

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BOOK: The Truth about Us
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“I'll keep an eye on her. I'm going to stick around,” Cale offers. “Jennifer's not as wasted either. I was talking to her earlier. We'll look after her.”

“You're sure?”

“No problem,” he says. “I'll make sure Nance gets home. She lives down the street from me.”

Keith and Penny fold up the lawn chairs.

“You're sure? Don't leave because of me,” I tell them.

“We'll find something to do,” Keith says, and Penny smacks him on the arm.

I blush but laugh. Keith dumps his beer on the ground and sticks the empty bottle back in the case.

“Jess!”

A deep voice calls my name. We all look over. My heart starts to pound.

chapter
twenty-five

Flynn stands by the fire. The reflection of the flames dances around him, and he looks wild, gorgeous, and completely unexpected.

How is it even possible he's here? I left him to babysit hours ago. It seems like the longest day of my life.

“Flynn?” I ask and walk toward him. And then we're moving toward each other, and it's like I'm in a dream sequence. We're facing each other, standing nose to nose. I start to laugh. “What are you doing here? How did you get here?” I glance around for Braxton, but it's just Flynn.

He puts out his arms, and I slide inside, smelling him and hugging him as hard as I can.

“I came,” he says, “to see you.”

The party goes on, and people laugh and talk as if everything is completely normal. But it's better than normal. Flynn is here.

Allie and Doug are behind him, walking toward us, holding hands. Flynn looks back at my sister and her boyfriend.

“After you and Penny left, he showed up at the house,” Allie says. “He came over to talk to Mom and Dad. And then Doug and I brought him here.”

“You were at our house? But how? Why?” I have no idea what's going on. The fire crackles behind us, and the sound of people having fun fills the night air. The area around is lit up from headlights of cars still arriving. But all I hear is Flynn.

“You're supposed to be babysitting,” I tell him.

“My mom unexpectedly got the night off,” he says. “So she let me come out. To find you. Braxton dropped me off at your house. I was going to take a bus home.”

“You should have heard him,” Allie says. “What he said to Dad.”

I hug him harder. He went to my house? I still can't believe he's here or that he spoke to my parents! This day has been too much.

“He totally made his case with Dad. He told him all the reasons he should be allowed to date you,” she tells me. She's grinning at both of us.

“Wow,” says Penny. “That's pretty great.”

“Cool,” adds Keith. He unfolds the chair he's holding and sets it down. “I guess we're staying now.”

I realize they're still standing behind me, staring and trying to figure out what's going on. Keith steps forward though and pounds fists with Flynn. “Nice work, bro,” he says with a grin. “Reeling in the parents.” He imitates throwing out a fishing line and reeling it back in.

Penny puts down her chair and crosses her arms. “Listen to the big talker.” She turns to Flynn. “My parents read Keith the riot act the first time they met him,” Penny adds. “He totally sucked up. He was super cute though. It worked.”

“Sorry, guys,” I say. “This is Flynn, and this is Penny. And Keith.”

“Penny Penny?” Flynn asks, smiling at her.

“Penny Penny,” I tell him.

The three of them laugh, and Penny starts elaborating about when her parents met Keith, and he laughs and tries to make himself sound much more macho than she's doing. While they're joking around, I turn to my sister. She drops Doug's hand and steps closer to me.

“He really stood up for himself, Jess. And for you,” she says softly. “He told Dad he really liked you and that he would treat you well. He told him he was a hard worker and that his family was going through tough times because of his stepfather but that he was nothing like him.”

Flynn laughs with Keith and Penny, and I watch him, my heart swelling.

“He asked Dad if he could date you,” Allie says. “Asked permission. And Dad actually agreed.” She holds both hands together and lifts them to her heart. “I kind of fell in love with him too.”

Doug rolls his eyes and reaches for her hand. “Let's not get carried away, Allie.”

She gives his hand a little smack. “Don't be jealous, Doug. Anyhow, that's when I asked him if he wanted to come to the bonfire with us. To surprise you.”

I reach out to hug her too, grateful she believes in Flynn. Grateful she's looking out for me.

Flynn moves to my side and puts an arm around me.

“Definitely staying?” Keith asks with a smile and plunks back down in his chair and reaches for a beer.

I'm in a blurry kind of heaven and don't let go of Flynn and watch the people I care about starting to get to know each other.

“I'm so glad you're here,” I whisper as the others talk.

“Me too,” he whispers backs and kisses the top of my head. “I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.”

My sister smiles at Flynn like he's the best thing that ever happened to me. I bury my anger with Nance for the lies she told about Flynn, because things worked out kind of great. My worry for her settles into the back of my mind for later. For right now, all I want to be is in the moment with my friends.

Allie's phone buzzes in the middle of an animated story, complete with hand gestures from Keith about a hiking trip he and Penny went on. I watch Allie still smiling at Keith as she reaches in her hoodie and pulls out the phone. She glances down, frowns, and then lifts it to her ear.

“Hello?”

Doug puts his arm around her as she listens, but she's frowning and shrugs him off and then turns her back and walks slightly away from us, one hand over her ear to block out the party noise.

When she turns back, her eyes are on Flynn, and they're wide and alarmed. He notices at the same time I do, and his body stiffens. Allie abruptly ends the call.

We've all stopped talking, and we're all watching her.

“Flynn,” she says. “We have to go. Right now. There's been an accident. At your house. Your friend Braxton called Mom and Dad. It's your brother. He's been hurt.”

• • •

When I climb inside Doug's car, I realize I've never been in it before. He and Allie have been together almost three years and this is the first time. Beside me, Flynn is vibrating, his face pale, his eyes wide.

“We're about twenty minutes from the hospital,” Doug says, turning around to look at Flynn. “I'll get you there in fifteen.”

He takes off out of the farmer's field at full speed. We drive in silence for a while, and then Allie's phone rings again and she picks it up before the first ring ends. She nods, listening, and then she turns to the backseat, lifts the phone, and hands it to Flynn. “It's your friend Braxton.”

I watch his face as he talks. Asking questions, closing his eyes, listening. Finally he ends the call and hands the phone back to Allie. Doug speeds through a yellow light.

I put my hand on Flynn's leg, and he looks at me, puzzled. “My stepfather, I mean, my mom's ex, he showed up at our house. Looking for money.” He presses his lips together and stares at his hands. He's making a fist, pressing it against his leg. “He went after my mom. I guess Kyle tried to get in the middle and he got hurt. Thrown against the wall. His head hit the edge of the coffee table. He lost a lot of blood. He was unconscious.”

“Oh shit” is the best I can manage. “Shit. He'll be okay,” I say. “It'll be okay.”

“Will it, Jess?” Flynn snaps in a low tone I've never heard before. I shrink back in my seat. “Just because you said so?”

“She didn't mean it like that,” Allie says quickly. “She's trying to help.” I see Doug look at us in the rearview mirror.

The air in the car is charged but quiet. “Sorry,” Flynn says after a moment, but his teeth are gritted and his hands are shaking.

“No,” I say. “No. It's okay. You're worried. Of course.”

He turns away from me, staring out the window at the flashing lights of traffic and streetlights as Doug speeds toward the hospital. “I should have been there. If I'd been there, this wouldn't have happened.”

I want to throw my arms around him but reach for his hand. “Flynn, it's not your fault,” I say, but he doesn't look into my eyes. It's subtle, but after a moment, he pulls his hand away.

“We're almost there,” Doug says, his hands on the wheel, driving his heart out.

“Braxton's at the hospital with my mom. Kyle will be okay. But ambulances and hospital visits. They're not okay for my family. I know it's not something you guys have to worry about, but my family…we don't even have insurance.”

“He'll have to pay,” Allie says, lifting her chin, her eyes flaring with outrage. “Your stepfather.”

“Ex-stepfather,” I tell her.

Flynn laughs bitterly. “Yeah. The thing is, he has no money. None. That's why he went to find my mom. He's not even her ex, not legally. They're still married.” He looks like he's going to rip the throat off someone with his bare teeth.

“Well, we'll find a way,” Allie says, “To make him pay. Our dad's a lawyer, Flynn.”

Flynn shakes his head. “You don't understand.” He doesn't say it unkindly, but Allie and I stare at each other over the top of her seat. He's right. We don't.

“Okay,” Doug says from the front. “We're here. I'll drive straight to the emergency entrance. You two go.”

“No.” Flynn turns and looks me in the eye. “I know you want to help, Jess, and I appreciate it, but no. I need to go myself. I need to talk to my mom alone. Kyle's going to be okay, so I'll be fine. Please? Okay? I need to do this myself. Braxton'll make sure we get home.”

Doug stops the car, and he and Allie pretend to look out the windows and not listen.

“Are you sure?” I ask, not convinced. “I can stay with you. Help.”

“I'll call you as soon as I know more about Kyle. I'll call you at home.”

He slides over to the door and opens it. “Thank you,” he says to Doug and Allie. “I didn't mean to be a dick.”

“No. Of course, you're worried,” Allie says. She glances at me, and her eyebrows are furrowed, concerned.

Flynn leans over and kisses my cheek. “I'll call you,” he says.

And then he's gone.

• • •

When I wake up, my first thought is about Flynn. And then Kyle and his mom. They're home. At least I know that from the abrupt call from Flynn late last night. Kyle has a concussion, but he'll be okay.

My insides ache, wanting to be with Flynn, wishing he'd let me stay with him. I get up and go to the top of the stairs, and based on the murmuring voices, Mom, Dad, and Allie are up and in the kitchen. I stop, watching the three of them talk. It looks almost normal. Like we're a normal family.

Mom turns as if she senses me and stands as I walk down the stairs.

“Jess.” She comes over to meet me and puts her arms around me. The hug is good.

We walk to the table, and I and plunk down in the empty chair. Mom sinks down again too. I can't help but notice that it's been a long time since we've all been around the table at the same time.

• • •

Everything is supposed to be back to normal. But I forget what normal smells like, tastes like, or even looks like. I'm in this weird place in my head, with no way to reach Flynn. I want to go to his house, but everyone in my family suddenly has an opinion about my life and advises me to give Flynn time. Give him the weekend with the family.

Mom spends most of Sunday making appointments with therapists. Sounds like she's booking time for all of us. Dad doesn't pull out his work once, and Allie sticks around all day too, not spending every moment at Doug's. It's hard to breathe, sharing the space with everyone again.

“I'm supposed to work tomorrow,” I say to my dad on Sunday night after a long day hoping Flynn would reach out to me and hearing nothing.

He nods. “Go.”

I need to go back to New Beginnings. I need to see the people and talk to Wilf.

Of course I also have the not-so-secret hope that maybe Flynn will show up too. It's the place that brought us together. Maybe it can bring us back.

chapter
twenty-six

Sunny sees me when I arrive. Her lips are pressed tight, and she avoids looking me in the eyes. “Stella wants you to go see her first thing.”

I go straight to Stella's office.

“Hey, Jess,” Stella says when I step inside. She doesn't look very happy to see me, and she looks frazzled. Tired. Her fingers are on the keyboard, but her eyes are on me.

“You heard about Kyle?” I guess, not about to beat around the bush. Forget small talk.

“What about Kyle?” She frowns and presses her lips tight.

“His dad. He showed up at their house. Kyle got hurt.”

“Oh my gosh,” she says. “Is he okay? Is Flynn okay?”

“Kyle will be fine, and Flynn wasn't there. He was at a party. With me,” I say. Her eyebrows bunch together. “He talked to my parents. They're okay with us now.”

She's shaking her head and leaning forward, watching me, as if she's trying to figure out how I managed to get Kyle hurt.

“They can come back now, right? You told Flynn he'd mess things up for me. It's not true. Keeping them away. It's not fair.”

Stella rubs her chin, not looking at me. She lets out a big breath.

“Stella?”

She raises her hand and shakes her head. “I have some other news.”

Her tone surprises me, and I forget the speech I was about to make.

“It's Wilf,” she says softly, and I realize that her eyes are sad. Not tired. Sad.

The hairs on my arms stand up. My body goes cold.

“I'm sorry,” she says and sighs again. “I know you liked each other.”

Liked. Past tense.

“Why are you sorry, Stella?” Hot tears bunch up behind my eyes.

“He passed on,” she says. “Last night.”

I blink, imagining him working in the greenhouse beside me. Twinkling eyes. Growly voice. The eyes won out. Every time.

“He's been sick for a while,” Stella says. “It wasn't totally unexpected. But it was fast.”

I bite my lip, refusing to cry. “He didn't tell me. I even asked.”

“Probably he didn't want you to worry.” She leans over and takes something from a drawer in her desk. “He left this for you last week. Said to give it to you when it was time.”

“He knew? He really knew he was dying?”

“I don't think he knew it would happen so fast. But I think he was ready.”

I stare at the envelope in her hand, not wanting any of it to be true. The tears biting at my eyes are hot. They hurt.

Even though she could hand the envelope across the desk, Stella stands. She walks around, tucks the envelope in my hand, and pats me on the shoulder. “There's going to be a service for him. Thursday. At Deerlodge. A few of us are going to go together if you want to join us.”

I nod. I do. I want to join them.

“You okay?” she asks.

I gnaw on my lip and stare at the envelope in my hand. “I only knew him a few weeks. You knew him a lot longer.”

“With a good friend it's not always how long you knew them, but how well you did.”

The truth of that simple statement tugs my heart. I glance up at her then. “What about you? You okay?”

She smiles, but it's a sad smile. “At my age you see people go. It is easier to see people Wilf's age go. Easier than when young people are taken too early.”

We look at each other. Something in her eyes makes me ask. Invites me to ask. “Did you lose someone, Stella?” I ask softly.

She leans against the corner of her desk. “I had a son.”

My mouth opens.

“I didn't raise him,” she adds quickly. “I was young when I had him. Only fifteen when he was born. He was adopted. He contacted me when he was twenty-one. We saw each other from time to time. He was a lovely person. Brought up by a lovely family. They did a fine job. He was good to me.” She sucks in a quick breath. “He was killed in an accident. Too young.” She shakes her head. “It's hard when people leave us.”

My chest feels like it's been pried open, but my heart beats hard with sorrow for the son she had to give up. The son she got back and then lost. And for Wilf. My grouchy old friend who will be missed. I glance down at the envelope in my hand. On the front is my name in shaky penmanship.

“Wilf was a good man,” she says. “He told me a while ago he'd be remembering New Beginnings in his will. I have no idea what he left. But I'm hoping we can use some to keep the greenhouse going.”

“Cool,” I say softly. “That's cool.”

She folds her hands. “Wilf was ready. He planned his exit strategy, tied up the loose ends. Even arranged his own memorial. He loved his wife so much. He wanted to be with her again. I think he's happier now.”

I nod, trying to smile. She's right.

“You know he was a wealthy man.”

“He was?” I glance up, surprised.

“I'm pretty sure he didn't leave you his fortune, so take that notion out of your head,” she says with a wry smile.

I can't help laughing. Because for a moment, it did pop in my head. But no. He knew it's not what I needed from him. He wouldn't do that.

She smiles sadly and then stands and walks around her desk and sits. “I have to get this paperwork done,” she says. “You're okay?”

I stand. “Can I have the key to the greenhouse? Check up on his plants?”

She waves a hand at me, telling me to take it.

“Jess?”

I look at her.

“Keep that key, okay?”

I do my best not to cry.

She nods at me. “Sometime, when you're ready, if you want, I'd like to talk about what happened to your mom.”

Surprised, I can only nod. I start to leave and then turn back. “Can I keep volunteering? Fit it around my school schedule?”

She leans back in her chair. “I'd like to put you in charge of the greenhouse. You want to do that? You can still work in the dining room sometimes. Some of our regulars would miss you.”

“That would be great.”

I leave her office, clutching the envelope in my hand, grabbing the greenhouse key from the hook where it hangs.

When I walk to the greenhouse, the tears I've held inside run freely down my cheeks. I walk straight to Rhea's azaleas. “Oh, Wilf,” I say to the air around me. “Why'd you have to leave me too?”

“It's not about you this time, sweetheart,” I almost hear him say.

I take a stool and move it to the azaleas, holding the envelope close to my heart.

Dear Jess,

Dear is an old term of endearment. In case you didn't know that. And since I'm old, it works. You are, you know. A dear. A strong girl. A good girl. A dear.

You're going to be all right, no matter what you did to land yourself in this place. In some ways, I suspect that my Rhea had a spiritual hand in it. Bringing you here. I've no doubt she's up there, an angel, looking out for me. I think she wanted us to meet. The daughter I never got to have. Or maybe the daughter of the daughter I never got to have. That's confusing.

Anyhow. If you're reading this, it means I'm departed.

Don't be sad for me. I was ready to go. Ready to be with my angel again.

I need to ask you a favor. I would like you to look after the greenhouse when I'm gone. Another reason Rhea brought you to me. Because you can carry it on. In her name. With the right amount of love and appreciation. I hope you can do this, and then when it's time for you to move on, let it go with no regrets. I've left funds to keep it running for as long as it can.

So good-bye, dear Jess. Remember you have your whole life ahead of you. Fight for what you want. Choose well. Be brave.

Love,

Wilf

BOOK: The Truth about Us
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