The Twiceborn Queen (The Proving Book 2) (23 page)

I guess he hadn’t seen a lot of me since we moved out here. I’d been busy, and had left him to amuse himself a lot, or spend time with one or other of the men, or Mac. Hard to believe that only a week ago I’d thought him dead, and would have given anything to spend another moment with him. Now I had him back, and already I was taking him for granted.

“No, why?”

Not taking him for granted. Trying to keep him alive.

“I was just wondering. Dad’s a dragon, you’re a dragon, Garth and Mac are wolves … everyone seems to be something special.”

“Not everyone, Monster. Steve and Dave and the other guys are all regular humans, same as you and Ben.”

He trod water, big brown eyes solemn. “I wish I was special. Do you think I might turn into a dragon one day too?”

God forbid. I wouldn’t wish the way I’d done it on anyone. Fortunately it wasn’t likely to start a trend, since it required a dying dragon to transfer their consciousness to their channel stone and make sure their target body swallowed the thing while they still had the strength to form a connection. And then came the whole fighting-for-control-of-the-body part. Fun times. “You don’t have to be a shifter to be special, honey. You are the specialest, most fantasmagorical kid that ever lived as far as I’m concerned.”

He gave me a sceptical look. “But you’re my mum. You’re supposed to think that.”

“Oh, right, so my opinion doesn’t matter, huh?”

“You know what I mean, Mum. It’s different. You can turn into a dragon any time you want, and do all this cool stuff.” I saw a new thought clamour for attention. He was so easy to read. “Don’t dragons like swimming? Is that why you’re not getting in?”

I laughed, and eased my way down into the water, the cold shock of it rising up my body. “No, I’m just a wuss. I don’t know. I hadn’t thought about it. I guess … not? Not many creatures swim for pleasure—unless they’re meant to be aquatic, like otters, or dolphins or whatever.”

“Did you know elephants are the only mammals that can’t even swim?” He was like a kitten, chasing every bright shiny new idea that rolled past.

“Where did you hear that? That doesn’t sound right.”

“Don’t know. I read it somewhere, I think.” He tipped his head to one side and frowned. “But maybe I’m getting mixed up. Maybe they’re the only animal that can’t jump.” He eyed me consideringly. “Do you reckon you could heat this whole pool if you breathed fire into it?”

I snorted. The things that went through the mind of a ten-year-old boy. “No idea.”

“Why don’t you try? I’ll get out if you like.”

So thoughtful. “No, that’s fine. I think I’ll just float here and relax for a while.”

I lay on my back, tipping my head right back so the cool water reached its wet fingers into my hair. The ceiling of the pool house was painted a dark blue and strung with fairy lights, giving the effect of looking up at the stars in the night sky. With my ears underwater, Lachie’s splashing made strange muffled noises, like listening to a heartbeat through an ultrasound. I felt shut off from the world, floating in my own little cocoon.

It made me sad that my baby didn’t feel special enough in this strange new world we’d entered. Being his own unique wonderful self should be enough, yet in his own childish way he’d hit on a problem I hadn’t considered before. What would his place be if I did pull off the enormous task before me and become queen of the shifters? He’d be fawned on by people trying to curry favour with me, or perhaps endangered by others plotting against me. He’d never know whether his shifter “friends” were true or not. Most of them would secretly look down on him, since he was merely a human. As if there were anything “mere” about being a human. The old Kate bristled at the thought, though the new one, with access to all Leandra’s memories, knew too well how shifters thought. They were all full of themselves, and dragons were the worst—they even looked down on other shifters. Humans barely rated above animals, as far as they were concerned.

I scudded along with my hands, watching the fake stars swirl above me. And what about Ben? Where did he fit in?

Dragons often took human playmates—but “play” was the all-important word there. How could a dragon queen take a human for a true mate? They didn’t even form lasting partnerships with other dragons.

And yet there’d have to be some kind of partnership, with at least one male dragon, or there’d be no dragon queenlings to fight over my throne one day. God, why was I even thinking about this now? Plenty of time to worry about succession planning later—first I had to win the damn throne.

Ben wouldn’t live forever anyway. I stood up, suddenly too agitated for floating. What if we had kids? Would I have to watch them all die? Would I have to watch Lachie grow old and die, and his children and grandchildren after that, while I stayed the same?

I swallowed abruptly, feeling sick. Water swirled around me as Lachie splashed past, but I hardly noticed. No wonder dragons grew so bitter and selfish. I’d already seen Lachie die once. I didn’t think I could do it again.

“Uncle Ben!” Lachie called, his voice alive with welcome. “Come and have a swim with us!”

I looked up, jolted out of my dark thoughts. Ben stood at the edge of the pool. His feet were bare but he wasn’t dressed for swimming.

“No, thanks, mate. Better to keep this arm out of the water, I think.”

“It might help,” he said, his face serious. “Tanya went in the pool all the time when she had her sore knee. She said it was hydro—hydro-thingy.”

“Hydrotherapy. Yeah, maybe next week. It’s a bit sore today.”

Probably because he was using it too much, in an effort to prove how much better he felt. Another one who was convinced he couldn’t be special enough without being a shifter. He sat on the edge, legs in the water. I swam over and heaved myself out to sit next to him, spraying him with droplets.

“Nice in?” he asked.

“Very refreshing.” Refreshing, my arse. The weight of the world bowed my shoulders.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You have a beautiful son and a loving partner right now. Yeah, so life is fleeting. Get over it.

“You sent the herald off?” I asked, in an effort to distract myself.

He nodded. “I also asked him, if I had a message for Jason, whether he’d be able to deliver it.”

“That was good thinking.” Not knowing where Jason was, or what he was doing—because he was undoubtedly doing something that would bite me in the arse the minute I least expected it—only added to my stress levels. And God knows they were high enough. “What did he say?”

“Sadly, no deal. He thought he might be overseas. Says no one’s seen him since New Year’s Eve. Obviously didn’t have a clue.”

“That’s a shame.” I sighed. “I guess that would have been too easy. And nothing’s ever easy lately, right?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” He took my wet hand and raised it to his lips. “Some things aren’t too difficult.”

“Like what?”

He still held my hand captive. “Like loving you.”

I drew in a sudden breath, startled out of my glum mood. I squeezed his hand, my heart thumping, as warmth flooded me.

“I love you too.” My voice came out in a whisper, tinged with emotion.

“Good God, woman, don’t
cry
. It’s meant to be a happy thing.”

“I
am
happy.” I swiped at my brimming eyes. “And I’m not crying. It’s water from the pool.”

“Right. And I’m a monkey’s uncle.”

“Hey!” Lachie splashed us both. “I heard that! You’re
my
uncle. Well, sort of. Are you calling me a monkey?”

“I don’t know.” Ben considered him, grinning. “At the moment you’re more of a drowned rat. You need to eat more, mate. You look like a strong wind could blow you away.”

I laughed, and felt a tight knot ease in my chest. After all, no one’s life came with a guarantee. We should all live for the moment; it was all we were sure of. The future would bring whatever it brought, and worrying about it now made no difference. For the moment I was happy.

He leaned in for a kiss. His mouth burned hot against my lips, still cool from my swim. “You know, maybe we should put Lachie to bed early tonight.”

I glanced at the sky beyond the glass walls of the pool house. Only the faintest tinge of pink hinted at the coming of night. “It’s not even dark yet.”

“But he’s had a very tiring day. All that swimming, you know. Come have a shower and I’ll help you wash all those hard-to-get-at places.”

“Such a noble sacrifice!” I shoved him affectionately and clambered to my feet. He certainly knew how to tempt a girl. I still tingled from his kiss. At least he seemed to be over his moodiness about me taking trueshape. His earlier words echoed uncomfortably in my mind.
I couldn’t bear it if you became like one of them
. Would he be so keen to get me naked if I were covered in scales? I pushed the thought away. We were all stressed. It was no surprise if he was having trouble adjusting.

“Come on, Lachie. It’s nearly dinner time. Time to get out.”

“Ohhh! Five more minutes? Please, Mum?”

“All right.”

I stood there dripping, watching him splashing about. He swam much better than last time I’d seen him in the water, ducking and diving like an otter, all sleek and gleaming brown skin. I guess that happened when you missed a whole chunk of someone’s life. Must have had good swimming teachers at that ritzy boarding school of his.

I grabbed a towel and attacked my wet hair. Mustn’t get maudlin again. I heard footsteps on the tiled floor, and came out from under the towel as Garth approached. He wore jeans despite the heat, and a plain white T-shirt that clung to his muscled chest. For once there were no Star Wars characters on it. Beads of sweat clung to his upper lip, and sparkled on the tips of his short, greying hair.

“You look like you could use a swim,” I said.

His gaze swept over my body, and for a moment I felt naked. Then he bared his teeth in the most feral grin I’d ever seen. “I’ve got something much better in mind. Mac and I are heading off now.”

I wrapped the towel around myself, suddenly self-conscious. Full moon tonight. The pair of them were going bush, disappearing into the national park around Berowra. It wasn’t far from here.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay? We could lock you in the stables.”

I’d made this argument before, reluctant to risk them to the wide open spaces. What if someone saw them? What if they attacked some poor hiker? Full moon was the one time when werewolves couldn’t control their change. Other nights they could choose to change or not, but at full moon it was forced on them, and the strength of the compulsion sent them wild. All except the oldest and most experienced lost any trace of their humanity.

As a result they either spent the night locked safely away, or found some remote location far from accidental contact with humans. I worried about what might happen to them outside the safety of these walls.

“No thanks. I need a run.” With an effort, he dragged his gaze back to my face. “It’ll clear my head.”

He walked away, something of the predator’s prowl already in the way he moved. Should I have insisted? The back door of the house opened and Kasumi came out. Garth angled his steps more toward the garage so he wouldn’t have to pass too close. She also gave him a wide berth. No love lost there.

Ben followed my gaze. “Don’t worry so much. He’s big enough and ugly enough to look after himself.”

“Maybe.” What was wrong with me today? I saw doom everywhere. “But what about Mac?”

“I wouldn’t want to meet either of them in the dark tonight.” He watched Kasumi approach. “Let’s hope this is good news.”

I felt even more awkward than usual having Kasumi bow at me while I stood dripping in my bikini.

“You really don’t need to do that. We’re pretty laid-back round here. How did you go?”

“Not well. None of his thralls survived his death. All mind-wiped. I found a human servant, but she knew nothing of any sixth sister.”

“What about his shifter servants? Those three wyvern brothers?”

“It was one of them whose form I used to question the servant. She didn’t know where they’d gone, but I couldn’t press her too hard without it looking odd. The goblins have disappeared too, perhaps back to their clans. Not surprising, in the circumstances.”

True. Everyone would be ducking for cover after the murder of their master, afraid they might be next.

“So basically we’re no better off than before,” said Ben. “We should find Blue and see if he can do something with those leshy ashes.”

God, was he still on about that? “You know that’s not going to work. Lachie, get out now.”

Lachie dragged himself up the ladder in slow motion, reluctance in every movement.

“Why wouldn’t it work? Just because Kasumi can’t use them doesn’t mean Blue couldn’t.”

I sighed, exasperated. “Blue is unco-operative, and a drunk. Plus now he’ll be hiding even more carefully than before. He made his opinion on helping us again quite clear.”

“Well, what other options do we have?” He looked as exasperated as I felt.

I had an idea in mind, but I wasn’t ready to share it yet.

While we bickered, Kasumi retrieved Lachie’s towel and held it out to him. He accepted it with a polite “thank you”, then looked up at her.

“Could you turn into me?”

“Yes.”

His eyes grew round. “Wish I could turn into you.”

She studied him gravely. “It takes years of practice. My own children play a version of hide and seek where they must hide in another form, and see if their friends can pick them out.”

“And can they?” He swiped ineffectively at the water on his skinny arms.

“Usually. A pine tree with a fox’s tail tends to stand out.” She smiled, and her whole face softened. “For some reason the tail is the hardest part to change. I had terrible trouble with it when I was your age. It was forever peeking out from under my clothes.”

“That sounds like fun.”

She shot me a look at the wistfulness in his voice, half-guilty, half-apologetic. Then she answered him in a brisk, no-nonsense tone. “Not at all. It’s a lot of work. No more exciting than doing homework is for you. And my children are so busy practising they don’t have time to play with Lego.”