The Ultimate Betrayal (6 page)

M
elanie flipped on the master bedroom television and turned it to one of the news channels. She stretched her arms toward the ceiling and went into the bathroom. She'd drunk a lot of water yesterday, so she'd been going in there a lot. This was a good thing, though, because water always helped flush out toxins and excess fat.

She removed her pajamas, stepped on the digital scale, and waited for it to register. After only one day of being on her new diet regimen, she'd already lost two pounds. She knew it was water weight, but she was still thrilled about it because it meant she was making progress.

Melanie slipped on her above-the-knee terry-cloth robe and walked back into the bedroom. Brad had just come back up from running on the treadmill.

“Good morning,” he said, pulling the towel from around his neck and wiping his face.

“Good morning. You were up early.”

“Yep, since five o'clock. After you gave me all that good lovin' last night, I slept like a baby and now I'm wide awake.”

Melanie shook her head, laughing. “Whatever.”

“I'm surprised you're not downstairs working out yourself.”

“I think I'll make some coffee first.”

“And you're gonna drink it before you get on the treadmill?”

“Yeah, I read an article that said drinking coffee enhances your endurance, and it also maximizes your fat- and calorie-burning ability.”

“I guess. Oh, and hey, when I leave the office this evening, why don't you meet me for dinner? A new steak restaurant opened a couple of weeks ago, and I heard it's excellent.”

“I don't know, maybe tomorrow.”

“Well, as much as I hate to tell you this, after today, I'll be knee-deep in this new case.”

“Another big one so soon? And does this mean you won't be home until late every night again?”

“Baby, I'm sorry, but you know I don't have a choice.”

Melanie frowned. “I'm really tired of spending all these nights and weekends alone.”

“I understand that, but what can I do? Quit?”

“If that's what it takes.”

“Baby, be serious. You know I can't do that.”

Melanie moved toward the doorway. “Sometimes I feel like I don't even have a husband.”

“So you're just going to walk out right in the middle of our conversation?”

“What else is there to say?”

“Well, for one thing, it won't always be this way.”

“It's already been this way for a while, and if anything it's getting worse.”

“I'm sorry, but as a senior-level partner I have certain responsibilities that I have to live up to. You know that.”

“I'm glad you've moved higher at the firm, but it's not doing much good for either of us if we can't spend any quality time together.”

“That's why I at least want us to go out tonight and have a nice dinner.”

Melanie wanted more than anything to be with Brad, but she also thought about her pledge to drink a shake for her last meal of the day. “If you don't mind, I'd rather not. I'm trying to cut back as much as I can.”

“You can order something healthy. Baked fish, veggies. I'm sure they have much more than steaks on the menu.”

“Yeah, but I don't want to be tempted by food I don't need.”

“You're not obsessing over your weight again, are you?”

“No, I just don't wanna eat badly this week.”

“Okay, fine. We can just have dinner here. I can pick up something on the way home.”

Melanie hadn't planned on telling him yet, but she figured now was as good a time as any. “Until I lose all this weight, all I'm having is a salad for lunch and protein shakes for breakfast and dinner.”

Brad raised his eyebrows. “Protein shakes? And that's all?”

“That's the plan.”

“Well, what weight is it that you need to lose exactly?”

“Brad, please. Don't pretend you don't see all these bulges.”

“I don't.”

“You must be blind, then.”

“Wait a minute. Didn't you say you had lunch with your mom yesterday? Was she trippin' about your weight again?”

“It's not about her. I decided to make these changes over the weekend.”

“Have you looked in the mirror lately? Because if you get any smaller, you'll be skin and bones.”

“I only have eight more pounds to go.”

Brad dropped down on the bed. “Baby, why have you always been so unhappy with the way you look? Especially when you look fine. I mean, so what if you have a few bulges. I don't see any, but if you do, you can fix that with toning.”

“I have to lose the weight first.”

“Is that why you still won't change clothes in front of me? Why we never make love unless the room is dark?”

Melanie no longer wanted to talk about this. “Let's just leave well enough alone, okay?”

“Baby, I'm not trying to upset you, but not wanting to be naked in front of your own husband isn't normal. Especially when you don't have a thing to be ashamed of. Plus, I wouldn't care if you were thirty pounds overweight, I would still love you just the same.”

“I don't expect you to understand.”

“I really don't.”

“And you probably never will, but this is something I have to do for me.”

Brad raised his hands in defeat.

Melanie turned toward the doorway. “I'm heading downstairs. You want any breakfast?”

“Thought you were having a shake?”

“I am, but I can still make you something.”

“Don't worry about it. I'll get something on my way to the office.”

Melanie knew he was angry, but she left the room anyway. There was no sense arguing about something Brad couldn't comprehend. He'd never had a weight problem and could eat whatever he wanted, so how could he possibly understand how she felt?

When she walked through the kitchen, she filled the coffeepot with enough water to make six cups and pushed the Start button. She was glad she'd already inserted the paper filter and poured in the coffee grounds the night before.

She took her multivitamin and then drank her premixed protein shake, which tasted delicious. So far so good. Yesterday, she'd stuck to her plan and she'd lost two pounds, and now she felt energized. She knew that once she finished her workout, she'd feel even better.

But suddenly, out of nowhere, her mother's words struck her again and she didn't feel so great. “
You're looking like a size ten again
.” Melanie sat down at the granite island and thought back to her childhood. Her parents had argued all the time, and while she'd hated listening to them, it hadn't compared to hearing the names her dad used to call her. Miss Tubby, Miss Butterball, and Mellie Melon. He would laugh out loud about it and hadn't seen a thing wrong with what he was saying, and as Melanie had gotten older, her self-esteem had diminished little by little. Her mother had never thought those nicknames were all that funny, however, and almost daily, she'd been furious with Melanie for being so heavy. So much so, her mother bypassed nicknames altogether and had flat-out told her she was fat. It was a wonder she'd still had enough confidence and courage to get her bachelor's degree in nursing and then two master's degrees. First, she'd completed a master's in nursing, and then she'd gone back to get a second master's with nurse practitioner specialization. She'd been practicing for two years, and the blessing, too, was that even though she hadn't had the best childhood, God had given her a wonderful husband and a career she loved.

Although, she had to admit, she was starting to worry about her marriage. It was bad enough that she and Brad rarely spent any special time together, but she also couldn't totally get beyond his terrible investment decisions. Or maybe this was all her fault. Maybe he was taking on monstrous cases and spending more and more time away from home because he no longer found her attractive. As recently as Saturday, he'd told her she looked “perfect,” but she knew he'd only done so to make her feel good. Especially since she clearly
didn't
look perfect and needed to lose weight. He also still hadn't lost the desire to make love to her, but what man didn't want sex? A man certainly didn't have to love a woman or think she was beautiful in order to feel satisfied.

Melanie glanced over at the coffee, waiting for it to finish brewing. She tried thinking about the positive things going on in her life, but soon, she heard her mother's “size ten” words again. She couldn't stop replaying them, and she also remembered her mother's warning, something she hadn't focused on much until now: “…the last thing you need is to go losing him…appearances mean everything…you have a responsibility to keep yourself up.” Her mother's voice was deafening, and Melanie's mind was made up. Today, she wouldn't even have a salad for lunch. She would go straight liquid for the next five days. She'd be down ten pounds—or more—in no time.

I
t was seven a.m., but Alicia hadn't slept a wink. She'd cried so much, her eyes were nearly swollen shut. She'd tossed and turned, gotten up and paced the bedroom floor, and tossed and turned in bed again. For the life of her, she
still
couldn't understand how she'd let something like this happen. Especially since she knew full well that sleeping with Levi had been the very reason she'd lost Phillip the first time. She wouldn't lose Phillip again, though. She just wouldn't. Not when she knew how much he loved her, how much she loved him, and how good he was for her. She'd spent four lengthy years doing everything she could to regain his trust, and finally, last year, he'd proposed. At that moment, he'd made her the happiest woman in the world, and she'd shed tears of joy before God. So there was no way she was going to ruin things between them. She'd made yet another grave mistake, but she was putting it all behind her. She would forget that yesterday ever happened. As it was, Levi had already called her twice last night and once this morning, but she'd ignored him. Interestingly enough, he hadn't left any voice messages, but she was sure it was because he was dead set on talking to her. When he called again, though, she would answer and explain things to him, letting him know that what they'd done should never have happened. She would tell him how much she loved Phillip and how she was going to marry him two months from now as planned. There was no doubt Levi would try to make his case, attempting to convince her otherwise, but this was the life she was choosing and he would have to accept it.

After Alicia went into the bathroom and washed her face with cold water, she walked downstairs to the kitchen. She turned on the television, pulled a bottle of sugar-free Cran-Apple juice from the refrigerator, and dropped down on one of the barstools. Hours had passed, yet she still couldn't get over the fact that she'd actually slept with Levi. She'd driven to a stranger's home to see him and slept with him like it was nothing. She'd allowed her flesh to manipulate her common sense, and she was ashamed of herself. Phillip deserved so much better than this, and if he ever found out about it, it would kill him.

But this, at least, was the one thing she wasn't worried about, because Levi wasn't the kind of man who played childish games. He'd reminded her of that when he'd emailed her two days ago. He would never tell Phillip or anyone else about the two of them sleeping together, and Alicia, of course, wouldn't tell anyone, either.

Alicia watched a few segments of CNN but found herself feeling more depressed. A few moments ago, she'd even gone as far as deciding that she hadn't slept with Levi after all and that this whole fiasco was nothing more than some horrible delusion. But she knew she was kidding herself and that not only had she made love with Levi, she'd done so willingly. This was the part that troubled her the most. Had Levi forced her to have sex with him or she'd just so happened to run into him by accident and one thing had led to another, she could place more of the blame on him. But, sadly, this wasn't the case. Alicia had done exactly what she'd wanted to do and hadn't done much at all to prevent it.

When she heard her phone ring, she rushed upstairs. She knew it was Levi, and she couldn't wait to end whatever he thought they had and be done with him for good. But when she picked up her phone and saw that it was Phillip, her stomach churned. She wasn't in the best shape to talk to him right now, but since she hadn't called him before bedtime last night the way he'd asked, she figured she'd better answer.

“Hello?”

“Hey, baby. Good morning.”

“Hey. How are you?”

“Couldn't be better. But you on the other hand sound like you just woke up.”

“No, I've been up for a while.”

“Are you okay?”

“I'm fine.”

“You also didn't sound like yourself when I talked to you yesterday.”

Alicia had been sure she'd sounded normal, but apparently not normal enough.

“I'm good. Really.”

“You must have read well into the middle of the night,” he said.

“Close to it, but why do you say that?”

“Because you never called me back.”

Alicia hated all the lying she was having to do to Phillip. “I know, baby, but it got late, and I was so exhausted.”

“How much more do you have to do?”

“Maybe a little less than half,” she said, then quickly remembered that yesterday she'd told him a similar amount. “I added a whole new chapter and did a ton of rewrites, so that slowed my reading down quite a bit.”

“The life of a writer. I'm sure you're drained.”

“I am. I really hope to be finished reading by this evening, though.”

“Are you sure you're okay?” he said.

“Please don't worry about me. I'm a little tired, but other than that I'm fine.”

“Okay, well if there's something I can do for you just tell me.”

“I really don't need anything, but thank you for asking.”

“Of course. Well…I guess I'd better get dressed. We have two different staff meetings at the church today, and then I need to go visit two of our members at the hospital. But you call me when you take a break.”

“I will, and you have good day, okay?”

“I love you, baby,” he said.

“I love you more.”

“Bye.”

Alicia removed the phone from her ear and held it close to her chest. She rocked back and forth as tears flowed down her face. “Oh my God, baby, I am so, so sorry. I am so, so sorry I did this to you again.”

She wiped her eyes, stood up, and went back down to the kitchen. This time she took her phone with her, and it was less than ten minutes before Levi called her. Her hands trembled and her body tightened, but she knew she had to get this over with.

“Hello?”

“Hey, beautiful, how are you?”

“Not good.”

“I'm sorry to hear that.”

“Are you?”

“Of course I am. Why would I want you to be unhappy?”

“What we did never should have happened. Which is why I begged you to leave me alone. I told you I didn't want to see you.”

“I hate that you're feeling so torn. You're caught in the middle of two men. One you feel obligated to be with and one you love from the bottom of your soul.”

“Why do you keep saying that? How many times do I have to tell you that it's Phillip who I love?”

“Sweetheart, have you forgotten the way we made each other feel yesterday? We were so in sync that not even the best writer alive could properly describe it. What we shared was beautiful and very much meant to be.”

Alicia held the phone in silence.

“You have to tell him,” he said.

“Tell who what?”

“You have to tell your ex the truth. Otherwise, you're going to feel more miserable by the day. Maybe before you saw me again, it was easy to pretend you didn't love me, but now you can't deny anything.”

“Love isn't everything.”

Levi chuckled. “Are you listening to yourself? I mean, do you really believe what you're saying?”

“Why won't you just find someone else to be with?”

“Because there is no one else for me. All I want is to love and take care of you for the rest of my life.”

“Not that any of this even matters, but how will you do that? What job are you gonna get?”

“I'm opening a restaurant. Mom still has hers there in Mitchell, but I'm opening an upscale one, the kind no other restaurant in town will be able to compare to.”

“And what bank do you think is going to give an ex-drug-dealer a business loan?”

“I don't need one. Remember years ago, when I talked to you a couple of times on the phone?”

“And?”

“You said something about all my money being confiscated, even my offshore accounts, but what did I say?”

“I don't know.”

“I told you that you obviously didn't know me very well.”

“That's beside the point.”

“I don't see how it is. Especially if you're worried about how we'll be able to pay bills and live the kind of life you've always been used to.”

“Why won't you just accept that what we had was great, but it's over?”

“There's a chance that maybe I could have. But not after yesterday. When you and I were making love, you were exactly where you wanted to be. I knew you'd been thinking about me and wanting to be with me again for a long time. Way before I even emailed you on Saturday.”

“That's not true,” she said, although she knew she'd never fully gotten Levi out of her system. She wasn't sure she ever would, but she had also made up her mind to love, honor, and cherish Phillip. He was the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.

“It
is
true, and when are you going to come see me again?” he asked.

“I'm not. Once we hang up, you and I are finished. No more phone calls, no more visits, no anything.”

“Remember before I was arrested, how you and I would lay up for hours after making love, laughing, talking, and holding each other? Remember how you hated when it was time for you to go home?”

Alicia couldn't take this anymore. “Just stop. What we did yesterday was wrong, and I take full responsibility for it. All I can do now is ask God to forgive me, and move on. If you call me again, I won't be answering. If you send me messages, I'm going to delete them.”

“We'll see.”

“I mean it, Levi.”

“So do I.”

“You take care.”

“You too.”

Alicia ended the call and felt relieved. Maybe now Levi was finally taking her seriously. If for some reason he wasn't, that was his problem. It was something he'd have to deal with and get over on his own. She was marrying Phillip, and that was all that mattered.