“Well, as I’m sure you can guess, the operation was a success and gave me back over half of my adult life. What I’m sure you couldn’t guess, and what no one has known until now, is that the kidney that Mr. Hamilton found was his own.”
Red paused on the videotape to take a drink of water, and young Jason Stevens stared at me in disbelief. On the big screen, Red continued. “There’s only one way in the world to explain something like that, and it’s called friendship. Now, Jason, I know you think you have a lot of friends. But the reality is, you have a lot of people who simply want your money or the things it will buy. Except for your time with Gus Caldwell, you’ve never worked a day in your life nor done anything I would call productive. But you have been the life of the party and an easy touch for a lot of weak hangers-on you casually call friends.
“During the next thirty days, I want you to spend a lot of time thinking and observing. I want you to find what you feel to be the principles that underlie true friendship, and I want you to be able to report to Mr. Hamilton an example of true friendship that demonstrates your principles. Jason, you will never do anything in your life that will bring more quality to your existence than growing to understand and nurture friendship.”
The videotape ended, and Jason seemed to be deep in thought. Finally, he blurted out, “I don’t understand. I mean—”
I interrupted him. “I know you don’t understand. That’s the whole point. I only hope that you will remember your great-uncle’s words and, for your sake, by the end of the month you are at least beginning to understand. I will look forward to your report.”
I walked out of the conference room, leaving young Jason Stevens to his assignment.
On the last day of the month, Miss Hastings called into my office to let me know that Jason had set up an appointment and would be arriving within the hour. I sat back and thought about my lifelong friend, Red Stevens. I wasn’t sure how you could teach someone the depth to which a friendship could grow, especially if the person had never experienced it himself. I will admit to feeling a great sense of doubt and foreboding as I considered Jason’s prospects of succeeding in the task Red Stevens had given him.
As we gathered around the conference table, Miss Hastings and I were quiet. Both of us were observing Jason’s expression and manner. He seemed to have a lot on his mind. He gave us each a perfunctory greeting and muttered, “I hope that … well, I mean … I just don’t—”
Miss Hastings stopped him by saying, “I believe our agenda today involved your report to Mr. Hamilton on your progress with respect to understanding friendship.”
Jason looked at me doubtfully, and I nodded and gave him a brief smile of encouragement.
He began. “I thought a lot about friendship this month, and I tried to come up with the principles that define friendship. The best I can do is to say that friendship involves loyalty, commitment, and a process that includes sharing another person’s life. It even goes deeper than that, but it’s hard to put into words.
“The best example of friendship I can give to demonstrate my principles is a story that Gus Caldwell told me when I was working for him in Texas. He explained that when he and Uncle Red got started in the cattle business, they had ranches several miles apart, but they and several other ranchers all shared the same range. Each spring, all the ranchers would have what they call a roundup, which apparently involved collecting and branding all of the new calves, called yearlings, which had been born since the last roundup.
“As Mr. Caldwell explained it to me, the young calves simply follow their mothers wherever they go, so as the cattle are collected, representatives from each ranch are present to brand each new calf with the same brand as its mother’s.
“Well, it seems that early on, Mr. Caldwell was very concerned that Uncle Red wasn’t going to make it as a rancher. So, during the roundup one year, Gus simply branded a number of calves that should have been his own with Uncle Red’s brand. He told me that he figured that he had been able to give over thirty calves to Uncle Red through that process.
“But at the end of the roundup, when Gus performed what is called a tally, which is simply counting all the cattle with his brand, he found that instead of being thirty calves short as he thought he should, he actually had almost fifty more than he started with.
“He was confused about that incident for many years until, while Mr. Caldwell and Uncle Red were on a fishing trip, Uncle Red told Gus that when they first got started, he had been worried about Gus making it in the business. Since he didn’t want to lose his best friend and neighbor, he had actually branded a bunch of his calves with Gus Caldwell’s brand.”
Jason paused and glanced at both Miss Hastings and me for any sign of approval. He continued. “That story that Mr. Caldwell told me about my Uncle Red best describes how I understand each of the elements of friendship. I know it takes many years to build a friendship like that, but I think somehow it must be worth it.
“As you know, last month I met Brian when his car broke down at the side of the road. I helped him get a new engine for it, and since then we have done several things together, and I hope that someday we can be friends like Gus Caldwell and my Uncle Red.”
Jason looked directly into my eyes and said, “And I hope I can be as good a friend as you were to Red Stevens.”
I smiled at him and said, “In my best judgment, you have begun your lifetime lesson in friendship. The only thing I can tell you is that any effort you put into a friendship is always returned manyfold.”
I thanked Jason for sharing the story about Red Stevens and Gus Caldwell. I had known for half a century that they were both great men and great friends. Jason’s story, passed to him by Gus Caldwell, was just one more example of great friendship.
Miss Hastings walked Jason out of the conference room, leaving me alone with my memories.
As I sat back in my chair and remembered my lifelong friend, Red Stevens, I reflected that our friendship had begun simply and without either of us understanding what our relationship would grow to be. Jason had learned the beginnings of how to be a friend, and I hoped that his new friendship would blossom into a lifelong treasure giving him as much pleasure as Red Stevens and I had enjoyed.
SIX
THE GIFT OF LEARNING
Education is a lifelong journey
whose destination expands
as you travel.
Red Stevens’ bequest to his great-nephew, Jason, represented the most unusual and, potentially, the most important matter I had ever handled for a client or a friend. As we entered the fourth month of our one-year journey with Jason, I was-n’t sure how much progress we were making. He had shown many signs of improvement, but his belligerent, arrogant, and selfish attitude—borne of a life of idle privilege—still showed through from time to time.
As we began our monthly ritual around the conference room table, he interrupted the proceedings before Miss Hastings could even start the videotape.
“Look, I have done everything you have said up to this point, and this has all been well and good, but I need to have some idea of where we are going here and what I get at the end of all of this. I can’t just waste a year out of my life.”
I stared at Jason for several moments and tried to think of what Red would want me to say. Finally, I responded. “Jason, it seems to me that your entire life to date has been a series of wasted years. I don’t see how this one-year acquiescence to your great-uncle’s will could do anything but improve your track record; however, you do have the option to stop this process at any point in time.”
He fired back at me, “Can’t you just give me some idea of what I am going to get out of this so I can decide if it’s all worth it?”
I gave him my courtroom stare and stated, “Young man, I am bound by honor, duty, and friendship to perform each step of this process as directed by Red Stevens. I have no option in the matter. You, indeed, do have an option. Either you play or you don’t play, but if you’re going to play, you’re going to play by the rules. Is there any part of that you don’t understand?”
Jason and I locked eyes, and we were in a staring contest that represented a test of wills. Unfortunately for him, my will had been tested many, many times over eighty years, and his was only just now being tested due to the love and concern of Red Stevens.
He finally looked away and mumbled, “Okay, let’s play the video.”
Red Stevens appeared on the screen and seemed to display a bit more intensity than before. It seemed that as we cleared each hurdle, the one before us seemed to take on more importance and significance.
Red began. “Jason, the next element of the gift I am trying to leave to you encompasses knowledge and learning. As you know, I never had the benefit of a formal education, and I realize that you have some kind of degree from that high-toned college we sent you to that is little more than a playground for the idle rich.”
Jason leaned back in his chair, slammed his fist onto the table, and blew out a long stream of air.
Red continued. “Now, before you get your feelings all hurt, I want you to realize that I respect universities as well as any type of formal education. It just wasn’t a part of my life. What was a part of my life was a constant curiosity and desire to learn everything I could about the people and world around me. I wasn’t able to go to school very long after I learned to read, but the ability to read, think, and observe made me a relatively well-educated man.
“But learning is a process. You can’t simply sit in a classroom and someday walk offstage with a sheepskin and call yourself educated. I believe the reason a graduation ceremony is called a commencement is because the process of learning begins—or commences—at that point. The schooling that went before simply provided the tools and the framework for the real lessons to come.
“In the final analysis, Jason, life—when lived on your own terms—is the ultimate teacher. My wealth and success have robbed you of that, and this is my best effort to repair the damage.”
Red paused for a few seconds, collected his thoughts, and continued. “Jason, you are going to be going on a little trip. Mr. Hamilton and Miss Hastings will be accompanying you. Your destination will be the greatest source of learning I ever discovered. If you will keep an open mind, you will find the key to the gift of learning that will serve you all the days of your life.
“After one month in this great place of learning, you must be able to explain to Mr. Hamilton—to his satisfaction—the fundamental key to all learning, education, and knowledge. Mr. Hamilton has all of the details and will give them to you as you need them. I wish you well.”
Miss Hastings got up to retrieve the videotape as Jason asked in a bored but resigned tone, “Where do we have to go, and what do we have to do?”
As I stood and started walking out of the room, I said, “Jason, we don’t have to go anywhere or do anything. We can stop this process right now, but if you want to continue, be at the airport, Gate 27, at seven in the morning. Bring your passport, some summer clothes, and a good attitude.”
The next morning, we actually met Jason—luggage in hand—crossing the long-term parking lot outside of the airport. I called to him, “Jason—good morning. I’m surprised to see you here a half-hour before the plane leaves.”
He laughed and said, “I thought I’d try to catch one without running a hundred-yard dash and squeezing in as they close the door.”
Miss Hastings took my arm as we crossed the driveway toward the terminal. She whispered to me, “It may be small and slow, but it does seem to be progress, indeed.”
Jason caught up with us and asked, “So, where are we going?”
I smiled at him and replied, “South America.”
Jason stopped in his tracks and asked, “What university or graduate school is located in South America?”
Miss Hastings responded to his question cheerily, “I’m quite certain you have never heard of it.”
Three flights later, we found ourselves in a rickety taxi, winding along a dirt road with dense jungle on either side. Eventually, we arrived at a dusty village with dirt streets and a few dilapidated buildings running along the edge of the jungle.
The taxi stopped in front of the largest building on the street, and we got out and retrieved our luggage. As the taxi drove off in a cloud of dust, Jason asked incredulously, “Are you sure we’re in the right place?”
I laughed and replied, “Education and learning are where you find them.”
We got settled into our three rooms in the modest but surprisingly comfortable hotel and agreed to meet in the lobby for breakfast the next day. I was very tired and fended off each of Jason’s queries by simply telling him that the lesson would begin in the morning.
With the hectic day of travel behind me, I slept well and met Miss Hastings in the lobby, where she had already procured a table for us at the edge of what passed for a dining room. Several moments later, Jason arrived, and we ate a quick and simple breakfast.
As I got up from the table, I said, “Jason, we’re going to walk down to the end of this street. There’s a building there where your education will begin.”