The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio (21 page)

• Use arousal to decrease the gag reflex. It does wonders!

The biggest obstacle is the gag reflex. Some of it is psychological, but some is physiological. If I tune in to my arousal primarily, it helps me overcome that reflex.

If I relax, take a slow deep breath, and take it bit by bit, it works. I have to get my throat used to it. It eventually slides right in.

It helps to make sure he doesn’t thrust. I have to do all the moving.

When you deep throat a penis or dildo, you are swallowing it all the way past the opening of your throat. What’s more, you’re not just putting it in there for a second before it’s over—you’re giving head, so it’s going to be pushing down your throat over and over. The only way to be able to do this is to overcome your gag reflex through practice. Famous magician Harry Houdini was a master of his own gag reflex. Magicians are physical performers who practice physical acts over and over until they seem effortless, and Houdini did exactly this with his throat. He would use the back of his throat as a hiding place for objects, putting them in his mouth and holding them easily in his throat, then bringing them back up when he needed them. Don’t try this at home, kids—but what I am suggesting is that with practice, anything is possible, and this is very true of conquering the urge to gag.

Practice First

Practice on a dildo—anything similar in size and shape to the penis you intend to deep throat is good, or get something as close to realistic as you can (if you’ll be giving head to a guy; if you will be fellating another dildo, then pick a similar one). Do not use anything that will break and possibly choke you, like a banana, and do not use anything that could slip from your grasp when it’s in your throat—for deep throat practice, cucumbers and zucchinis are out.

Make sure you always have a hold on the dildo; dildos with a base you can grab onto are recommended, because you can use the base like a handle and not worry about it going too deep, and you can easily back it out if you panic. Insert it into your mouth, and gradually let yourself get comfortable with the way it feels. With a gentle in-and-out motion, slowly push it a little farther back each time. Ease it in as far as feels comfortable to you, and remember to breathe around the dildo. When it reaches a certain point it will be difficult to take a breath, and it’s easy to panic—as it goes deep into your throat, you’ll want to exhale before you push it in, then inhale when you pull it out. Use this breathing technique when you deep throat your lover. Experiment with the sensation of swallowing with the dildo in your throat, and try a few practice thrusts as you become more comfortable. Practice every day until you feel confident to try it in real life.

I start by placing it near the back of my throat, and then by degrees, I swallow more. I find after awhile that I am able to bypass the gag reflex. It’s best not to deep throat him on a full stomach, also.

I’ve always found it works best with him lying down or leaning back, and to kneel beside him approaching him perpendicularly. I find that if I am sitting, I can’t get the angle right and have to be on my knees (unless he is really narrow, which makes it all-around easier). Sometimes it works better if I am facing the opposite direction pointing toward his feet—it’s all about positioning for me.

The best deep throat blow job I have ever received was when this girl hung her head over the side of the bed. I am over 7 inches and she took it all down her throat all the way to my balls. I couldn’t believe it.

Certain positions are conducive to opening up your throat, which makes deep throating easier. When you’re on your knees facing him, his penis is going to wind up pointing upward toward the soft palate in the back of your throat—right where it will trigger the strongest gag reflex. Angling his cock down your throat (not toward the top of your mouth) is the most comfortable way to deep throat and will make you gag the least. The best position is lying on your back, with your head tilted back and slightly off the edge of a bed or couch. Try it, and you’ll see how it elongates your neck and throat. Approaching the penis from above is also easier on your palate, and many people report that the angle of insertion is excellent for deep penetration. Another good position is 69 (reciprocal oral sex); you are essentially approaching from above, and the pathway down your throat is straightened.

Breathing , or remembering to breathe, is another essential component of deep throating (and not gagging). Time your up and down strokes with your breath. Inhale as you draw him in; exhale as you pull him out. It will almost seem as if you were breathing him in, a sexy notion itself. The best place to see breathing techniques in action is in porn;
Deep Throat
is a great example.

An Aphrodisiac for the Orally Fixated

People who deep throat may already have a handle on the link between their arousal and taking him all the way down—many find that deep throating turns them on like nothing else. There are two primary arousal sources stemming from deep throating: the physical stimulation, including the arousal hormones that are released, and the mental stimulation, encompassing the realms of fantasy fulfillment and desire. Some people find it turns them on so much, and so reliably, that it’s their favorite sex act, period.

Your mouth is an erogenous zone, no question about it—but in its entirety. The back of your mouth, tongue, palate, and throat have a different range and number of nerve endings than the sensitive front of your mouth, but they transmit messages of pleasure to your brain (and genitals) just the same. Sucking (suckling) and swallowing in an erotic context stimulates nerve pathways whose function is to build on your arousal levels, including increasing the production of the arousal hormone, oxytocin. We get physical gratification from oral stimulation, and we get it in spades when we swallow our lover to the root. The intimacy of the complete face-to-penis contact inherent in deep throating is overwhelmingly hot. This encompasses all the other stimulating sensory information, such as seeing him up close and smelling his skin and pubic hair. The physical eroticism of deep throating can’t be found anywhere else in the realm of sex. The physical sensory information is overwhelming, and it combines easily with the mental stimulation stemming from the act—physical and mental stimulation being required to work in tandem to produce arousal and orgasm. The reality of deep throating is right there in your face, and this is an incredible turn-on for many of us. Merely the fact (and realization) that you’re doing it is hot—you’re directly anchored to the moment, fully present. In addition, your fantasy life can be anywhere when you’ve got him in your throat. You can imagine that you’re in a roomful of people, in public, a porn star, or anything else that turns you on.

Taking Deep Throat Further

Now that you’ve got the technique in your bag of tricks, know all there is to know about how and why it works, and know how to use it to turn yourself on, take your technique as far as it can go. There are a number of tricks and twists on the technique that can help you to heighten the experience for both of you. You’ll likely come up with several of your own along the way, but here are some suggestions:

• When he’s in deep, freeze, and swallow.

• Instead of moving your head, constrict your throat muscles around his penis, making the rhythmic movement occur within you.

• Put him all the way in and vary your rhythm with long and short strokes: alternate short and deep for a few beats, then long and deep for a few.

• Swallowing the head of his cock, twist your head slightly and slowly from side to side.

• Experiment with extending your tongue out the front of your mouth. It will rub the sensitive underside of his shaft.

• When you exhale, moan to vibrate him in your mouth.

• To give your hands something to do, cup, fondle, or tug on his balls, stimulate his perineum with your fingertips, penetrate his anus with your fingers or a sex toy. You can also reach up and play with his nipples.

• Grab his hips and bring him into your mouth, ”forcing” him all the way in.

• Put his hands on your head. He can rest them lightly and enjoy feeling your head move in addition to the fellatio, or he can move your head as he likes. It might turn you both on to have him “use” your head and mouth in this way. An adventurous variation is for him to grab fistfuls of your hair.

Oral Authority

by Alison Tyler

“I’m going to teach you how to suck cock,” Audrey assured me after I confessed my lack of expertise in that particular sexual arena. I looked over at my beautiful blonde best friend, then let my gaze wander down to the crotch of her chicly faded 501s. She caught the glance and knew exactly what I was thinking. “Not on me, silly,” she explained, “on Duncan.” When I remained silent, she glanced up at me from her velvet sofa, her startling green eyes opened wide. “You do like Duncan, don’t you, Stella?”

Now, I blushed. Duncan was Audrey’s very attractive roommate. He had a regular spot on one of those beach-babe shows, and his body was just incredible. Tanned. Muscular. Perfect for the lifeguard he played on TV. Aside from that, he was actually an extremely nice guy. The thought of using him as a living sex toy both excited and terrified me.

“Why not start me off with a banana?” I asked, twirling one of my caramel-colored curls around my fingertips.

“Bananas break,” Audrey said knowingly. “You don’t want to choke. If anything, we can use a cucumber to get you ready while we wait for Duncan to show up.”

Before I could say a word, she headed to the kitchen. I heard her rustling around in the refrigerator, and we she came back, she had a slender zucchini in one hand. “We were all out of cukes. So hold this while I buzz Duncan.” That said, she dashed off a quick message to her roommate on his Blackberry, and then she returned to cuddle next to me on her leopard-print lounge. I sat staring at the vegetable and wondering why I was getting so wet.

“Here’s the deal,” Audrey began. “Breathing is the most important part of going down deep. Before you slide the zucchini into your throat, I want you to exhale—”

Her instructions reminded me of my Yoga class. Don’t breathe the breath, let the breath breathe you. Still, I did my best, pretending the veggie was Duncan and slipping the head into my mouth. As I worked the slippery zucchini farther in, Audrey continued, “Inhale when you pull it out, and you’ll be ready for him to slide inside you again.” I pushed the smooth veggie-tool back into my throat, and I tentatively tried swallowing down on it. Quickly, I pulled the zucchini back out again.

“It feels weird,” I said, hoping I didn’t sound too panicked.

“You need the real thing,” Audrey assured me. “But don’t worry, I’ll never leave your side. What you require in this sort of situation is an oral authority.” I stared down at the slippery zucchini discarded despondently in my lap. “Giving head is just like anything else,” Audrey continued. “You learn the little tricks of the trade, and your confidence grows. Duncan will be gentle with you. Just keep your hand on the base of his cock, and you’ll be in control. You can push back if he’s going too fast.”

Duncan arrived ten minutes later. I wondered how many red lights he’d run on his way over, but I didn’t bother asking. My face was probably as crimson as my dress, and I found that I couldn’t meet his eyes. He sat down on the chair across from me and just smiled, obviously waiting for someone to tell him the game plan. Audrey perched her lithe body up on the arm of his chair and started whispering to him. I could make out snippets of her discussion—“Not a virgin, just not super comfortable with the whole idea”—and then I looked down at my hands again.

After a moment, Duncan came to sit by my side. “Is it something you really want to learn, Stella?” he asked.

I nodded.

“Then it’s best to practice with friends,” and the Cheshire grin on his face let me know he understood just how ridiculous this all was. A willing girl was going to give him a blow job, and he would be expected to give instructions all the way through. “But I’d like it if Audrey would help you relax, first,” he said, and as he spoke, my naughty best friend got into position on the floor between my thighs and lifted the hem of my dress. As soon as I felt Audrey’s breath on my panties, I sighed. And as soon as I sighed, Duncan put my hand on the crotch of his jeans. We were starting from the top.

Slowly, I worked down his button fly. Then I watched as he split the jeans open for me, revealing his erection. Audrey had her mouth pressed against my pussy now through my panties, and I turned my head and opened my own mouth, bringing the tip of Duncan’s hard-on between my lips. “That’s the way,” he said, sliding his hands through my light brown curls. “You just relax and take it all the way down. The key word here is relax, and remember to breathe—”