The Understorey, Book One of The Leaving Series (39 page)

She was a young woman and that made me wonder
if I had matured alongside her, unaware, as she most likely was, of
the invisible progression. I hoped I looked every bit the man I
felt like right then because I knew, just by looking at her, that
we would be married and shortly after graduation. I felt it in my
rapidly matured bones.

    “My dad said they’re
leaving the day after tomorrow, early,” she said, having seen my
reflection in the glass.

She turned her face toward mine and I could
see the tears sink into her blouse.
    “Oh Jules,” I said and with two strides I had
her in my arms. “It’s not forever Jules.”
Though it will feel
like it to me
, I thought.
    “It will feel like it to me,” she said, speaking
my thoughts aloud.
I sighed. I couldn’t argue with her but I could at least try to
make her feel better.
    “It just feels like it
might,”
I lied,
“because there’s not a definite time frame.”
    “Maybe,” she said, trying to appease me.
It was pathetic trying to keep up appearances with a person who
knew your every thought.
    “This is stupid,” I laughed. “It’s gonna’ suck,
big time, but it’s beyond us right now Jules and it’s something we
have to do.”

I stopped because I knew I’d just end up
begging her to stay if I continued. I couldn’t help but be selfish
sometimes. I changed the subject to save myself.
    “Let’s spend the day tomorrow, just you and me
and get our absolute fill of each other.”
We knew that was impossible but we could try.
    “Of course babe. I need a lot of you to tide me
over. You know? It’s funny but the more I touch, and kiss, and just
be with you the greater my need for you is. We’re a catch twenty
two. I’m damned if I do indulge myself in you and damned if I
don’t. You’re the very worst kind of addiction, the most
dangerous,” she said.
    “Would you go back? Change it? If you
could?”
    “Not for anything,” she smiled up at me.
I squeezed Jules’ hand and asked her to call me in the morning,
knowing I would barely sleep a wink.
   
    The next morning, I felt like I was waking from
a dream. I shuffled into the kitchen glancing at the mess that was
my hair in the hallway mirror.
    “Hey mom,” I said.
    “Hi honey. Hungry?”
    “Nope.”
    “I understand,” she said and sat beside me.
“What are the Jacobs going to do Elliott?”
    “They’re sending Jules to Mauch Chunk, like I
thought they would.”
    “When can she come back?” She asked. “When they
figure out who is doing this?”
    “I know who’s doing it ma’. I just have to prove
it now.”

This time she didn’t argue with me, whether
it was because she started to believe it was possible that Jesse
was responsible or that she didn’t want to ruffle my feathers, I’m
not sure. The phone rang then and it was Jules.

    “Come over,” she barely
said, “let’s go to the rock bridge.”
That was all I needed to hear and I was as good as out the
door.
    I picked Jules up from her house and her eyes
looked so tired, her skin was beginning to hollow on her even more
now but her smile was still as warm as ever.
    “I’ve missed you terribly,” she said
softly.
    “So have I dear. It feels like ages.”

We slowly walked our invisible path to our
marble slab and were in absolutely no hurry. I was so grateful that
Jules hadn’t seen the package. I tried to leave out as much detail
as possible for her sake. It would have done nothing but worry her
more and she was looking so frail these days.

I was dreading her departure but was hopeful
that Jules would let the worry stop taking its toll on her. I
jumped onto the face and turned to pull her up with me. I had a
sickening feeling that this was our goodbye, albeit temporary, but
a goodbye nonetheless and made the decision to savor every last
second.

For hours, we sat side by side intertwined,
talking. From little things like Maddy’s reactions to all the gifts
to things like her concern that I not do anything drastic. In the
end, I promised that no one would get hurt, at least not by my
hands. Eventually we fell asleep. Neither of us had slept well
these past few days, weeks really, and as we laid skin to skin we
drifted off until the moon woke me.

    “Jules,” I
whispered.
    “Hmm?” She said, not opening her eyes.
    “It’s ten o’clock babe,” I said, sliding my
pocket watch back into my pocket.
    “What?” Her eyes popped open.
    “Yeah,” I laughed, “ten, at night.”
    “Oops.”
    “Yeah, I think we should get you back home so
they don’t worry.”
    “Grrrr.”   
    “We have to. I don’t want them to call Danny or
anything.”
    “Okaaaay.”
We hurriedly walked to my truck, tripping over roots and whipping
ourselves in the head with leaves.
    “Why didn’t I bring a flashlight? We need to
just keep one in our bags. They’re kind of useful, especially since
we do stupid things like this. I’ve decided, from now on, I will
have not one but two flashlights on me at all times.”
    “You’re cranky when you first wake.”
    “I know,” I laughed.

It was a solemn ride to Jules’ house. I
didn’t even know when Jules was leaving because I didn’t ask. It
hurt too much to think about.

    “I’m leaving tomorrow
morning,” she said, riding my wavelength.
I wasn’t expecting that.
    “What? Tomorrow?” I asked in disbelief.
    “Yeah, my mom isn’t comfortable with me being
here any longer and it’s affecting her. My Aunt Isabel is taking me
home with Rocky and the rest will follow after New Year’s.”
    “I don’t think that’s wise Jules, so many will
be on the road tomorrow. It wouldn’t be safe.” She wasn’t buying
it. “Besides, you can’t leave before New Year’s, it’s the only time
you’ll let me kiss you in front of your family and I get a secret
thrill from it.”
    “Shut up,” she laughed.
    “No, but seriously Jules, you can’t leave before
New Year’s.”
    “I don’t have a choice Elliott,” she choked.

The remainder of the trip was agonizing
because I knew this would be the last time I would see her for
days, weeks, maybe even months.

The uncertainty was as painful as the
separation itself. I wanted to kick myself for falling asleep. I
should have kissed her until my lips were bleeding to get my fill
of her. I should have drunk in the greens of her eyes, re-memorized
the lines of her face over and over and burned them into my memory
even deeper than they already were. I wasted so much time. I could
have been with her, instead we were unconscious and I felt a
bubbling fear rise in my throat.

When I opened my door, instead of letting her
wait for me to get hers I slid her over my seat and brought her out
of my door. I shut the door and pinned her against it.

    “You can’t go,” I pleaded.
“If you want, I’ll get on my knees.”
    “Elliott, all my family is in there,” she peeked
over the hood.
    “Oh who cares! They can’t hear us anyway they’re
all having fun in there, you can tell by the rumbling. They know
you’re safe with me, wherever they think you are. Please don’t do
this. You know this is what
they
want right? They want us
separating. The best thing we can do is to have you stay but stay
at my house, with me.”
    “Yeah, like my parents would go for that.”
    “Okay, then stay at my Uncle Danny’s and Aunt
Becky’s. They have a spare room. You’d love it there.”
    “Elliott, be reasonable babe.”
I pressed my forehead against hers and gazed into her eyes.
    “I can’t be reasonable. Prudence left my
intentions for us the day I met you, even when we were kids we were
out of control but when time slipped away from us I had intended to
be an acquaintance of yours, seeing you at reunions and joking
about fishing with you as a kid then saying goodbye.

“I had no idea the knockdown, drag out
astonishing hold you’d put on me Jules. It’s your fault I can’t
live without you and it would be cruel for you to leave me now, no
matter how long you’re gone.”

I was thoroughly aware of the guilt trip I
was laying on her.
If I’m going to do it, I might as well really
do it
.

I took one deep breath. “You know, I’ve held
back with you out of respect but I want so badly for you to just
agree to marry me already Jules! The minute we walk across that
stage I want us to walk into the nearest courthouse because I love
you Julia Jacobs! And!” I took two more deep breaths. “The hell
with it!”

I attacked her. I pinned her to the driver’s
side door and thoroughly pressed my lips into hers. I abandoned all
control and did what I wanted. I breathed her in and could hear the
air fill my lungs. It was the deepest I’ve ever breathed my entire
life and I felt the strangest confidence in that freedom.

She groaned and tried to push me off of her
but eventually surrendered, despite the fear that her family was
just inside, a few walls away, as I kissed harder and deeper.

I pressed my body into hers, thread my
fingers through her thick hair and held the back of her head
against the window, with my free hand I put my thumb through the
belt loop next to her left hip and pinched the bone between my
fingers.

    “Alright,” she whispered
breathless.
    “Alright, you’ll marry me?” I asked, a huge grin
on my face.
    “No,” she laughed, “alright, I’ll compromise.
I’ll stay. I don’t think I would have been able to do it anyway,
not with my insatiable need to be touched by you, especially after
you’ve touched me like
this
.”
    “Sorry,” I said, dropping my hold on her, “I
literally
couldn’t help myself. The thought of your leaving
was enough to make me lose my cool.”
    “Well, gain control,” she scolded playfully,
“because I’m staying.”
    “You know I need you to do more than just
stay
Jules,” I said resting my lips against the hollow
beneath her ear. She paused for a long time, contemplating my
offer. Pausing was good.
    “Eventually, we’ll marry Elliott.”
    “Eventually, I’ll run out of ways to convince
you.”
    “No need to convince the already persuaded. We
only differ on the time frame.”
    “We’ll marry sooner than later,” I jested.
    “Or, not,” she said.

I kissed her neck again and this made her
eyes roll to the back of her head. I laughed. I knew my own powers
of persuasion.

I didn’t get enough of her to satisfy the
greed but it was late and I caught a glimmer of light from the
house where someone peeked through a closed curtain.

    “They know you’re here,” I
said.
    “Oh,” she complained.
    “It’s okay,” I said, “I’ll see you
tomorrow.”
    “Tomorrow.”

I woke late and hurriedly showered and
dressed. I needed to see Jules and arrange for her to be safe
somewhere else, just closer than Mauch Chunk.

    “Bye mom!” I yelled while
swinging my coat over my shoulders.
    “Where are you going son?” She asked me,
confused.
    “I’m going to Jules’ house. She changed her
mind. She’s staying and we’ve got to figure out a place for her to
stay. I was thinking Danny’s...........”
    “But she already left this morning,” my mom
interrupted.
    “What?” I said, only one arm in my coat.
    “Yeah, she came by but you were asleep. She
thought it best not to wake you and left this letter for
you.”
I sunk into the soft arm chair in defeat, not bothering to even
remove the jacket from my one arm.
    “She was here and didn’t wake me?”
    “Her dad was honking his horn honey. I was
surprised you didn’t wake from that. Does it make you feel better
that she was bitterly sad to be leaving?” She joked.
    “No, it doesn’t. It makes me feel worse.”
    “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that, but
what’s the big deal? She’ll be back before you know it
sugar.”
    “Yeah,” I sighed in consolation, “her dad must
have forced her to go. I probably would have done the same thing if
I had a daughter going through that.”
    “You’re a good boy.”
She handed me the letter and I retreated to my room, my coat still
half on.
Elliott,
So you got my note. Yikes, right? Our plan for my staying didn’t
sit well with my family, especially my dad. They’re so worried and
I don’t want to be the one who causes anyone pain, least of all
you, but they feel it’s the safest thing. I know you and Danny will
catch Jesse and Taylor soon and it will only be a matter of time
before I’m gathered in your arms........oh.........and try to do it
before school starts back up, ha ha, because my dad is threatening
to enroll me up here. That only gives you a week, but no pressure
or anything. Don’t feel hurried at all. I’ll only be nine hours
away for the duration of the investigation but by all means take
your time......just kidding. Or am I?.........Yes, I am. Honestly,
I really hope it’s resolved quickly but I absolutely dread the
danger it’s putting you in. So you HAVE to promise me you’ll be
exceedingly careful. I hate your being in Bramwell without me. It
makes me queasy at the thought of it. I have to know you’re safe,
always. I need four times daily updates, MINIMUM. I need love
letters, t-shirts that have swum in your cologne, all that pathetic
mushy stuff. I promise in return to write ‘Mrs. Elliott Gray, after
earning our bachelor’s’ *wink, wink* on all of my notebooks and
wear your letter jacket to all the dances. “I’m taken,” I’ll say
when the boys ask for a dance and raise my palm.
You’ve probably had enough of 4 a.m. Jules’ humor, so with that,
I’ll say.......
Until I can kiss you again. I love you Elliott Gray.
Your Jules

Her dad was threatening to enroll her in a
Mauch Chunk high school? She may have been joking about catching
them in the act before Christmas break ended but I was serious as a
heart attack about confronting them as soon as possible, now,
actually, but not before I went to Charleston. I was looking
forward to the after Christmas sales just not the same way most
others did.