The Vampire's Warden (6 page)

“
Indeed, my dear.” Michael had relaxed visibly, crossing his arms, and falling back into a carefree demeanor that did not seem to flow all the way up to his eyes. They were still harshly narrowed as he looked on Alex with clear suspicion.

“
Of course, when I last saw him, he looked somewhat different. You’ve added some years on, haven’t you Alex?”

“
This isn’t the time to get into it, Michael.”

“
She doesn’t know, does she? Well, now this is interesting.” He moved closer to me, close enough that I could see the tiny black flecks in the chilly blue of his eyes and feel the waves of dark hate flowing from him as he regarded Alex, “Are you here to protect her then, pretty boy? Are you going to save her from me?”

Oh, God. His voice. Even though my brain screamed out against it, I could feel a beguiling warmth curling through me. I struggled to push it back and ignore what my body was telling me it wanted. I’d never felt a need as great as this. It felt like my very soul was crying out for it. For him. I wanted his arms locked around me, his mouth on me, that delicious voice whispering into my ear. It felt like an inferno was beginning inside me, little flames reaching up inside me and burning my throat. What was this?

Vampire
. He is a vampire, Sarah. He is not human, I told myself. It took a staggering effort for me to do it, but I managed to make my feet step away, back to Alex. Safe, but empty somehow. The fire inside me died down a little, dampened by the cold protection of Alex standing beside me.

“
Let’s go, Sarah.”

I turned back only once as Alex guided me away. I caught Michael’s stare with my own, trying to find something redeemable in him, anything at all. As I sent my silly wish out to the universe, Michael’s eyes widened slightly. Something softened him momentarily. I felt a sigh escape me as he turned and disappeared.

Rays of bright penetrating light had swept across my down comforter and into my face. Rubbing my eyes in confusion, I turned to the alarm clock and shot up in bed. It was 8 a.m. I should have been up hours before, helping Nelly get breakfast for the Millers, the big group of ten who had rented the family cabin.

I shrugged into a clean turtleneck sweater and the same worn pair of jeans I had worn before and rushed down to the kitchen, already hearing the laughter and bickering of children coming from the dining room. When I entered the kitchen, I found Nelly frying a pan of eggs and Alex dumping biscuits into a basket lined with a linen towel. The sausage was already cooked and still steaming on a serving plate on the butcher block.

“
Why didn’t you guys wake me up?” I demanded, grabbing the egg mixture from the refrigerator to start the French toast. I slammed the door shut and turned to find them both staring at me, perplexed. Then Alex flashed one of his heart-breaking grins and put the biscuit pan on the counter next to the sink.

“
Chill out, boss lady. We figured you could use a morning sleeping in. We had it covered.”

I glared at him half-heartedly, “This isn’t your job, Alex.”

He laughed brightly, “I go where I’m needed. Besides, we had some extra help.”

“
The kids want some hot chocolate, Nelly.” My sister, Katie strode into the kitchen with a pot of coffee in her hand and a towel over one arm.

“
Katie?” My heart fluttered when I saw her familiar smile across the kitchen. She put down the coffee pot and came over to wrap her arms around me.

“
Hey, sis.” Her eyes, as warm and brown as our father’s had been, studied my face intently. Her super curly black hair fell across her shoulders just as it always had. It had taken most of her life to accept the fact that her curls were beautiful and not a burden.

However, it was Katie’s warmth and understanding that had always stood out. Her ability to reach into me and pull out the thoughts that I would want to remain hidden. She had a way of reasoning with me, comforting me, and urging me in the direction of something more positive than my dark mind tended to dwell on.

Knowing her abilities to get inside my head had never been more frightening to me. Protecting her was foremost in my muddled mind. I could not imagine telling her about the contents of our grandfather’s journal, much less about our
guest
in the meadow. But she would insist on it.

She smiled at me winningly, “I think we can trust these two to finish things up here so you and I can catch up on our girl talk. What do you think, Alex?” She flashed him a look of inquiry.

“
Leave it to Nelly and me.” He agreed, grabbing a stack of plates from the china cabinet, “Of course, if we don’t get this food to the Millers in the next few seconds, I’m going to end up stuffing it into my own mouth. It all looks delicious.”

Nelly smacked his hand when he reached for a piece of sausage and waved us out, “We’ve got it, girls. You two grab some coffee and go catch up.”

“
Tell me.” She said.

We had settled ourselves into a long wicker sofa on the bright back porch, holding our coffee mugs and sipping at it slowly. She had sat cross-legged on the floral cushions; her shoes had been dropped quickly under the coffee table before us. In comparison, I felt stiff and reluctant to begin. Katie had always been so much more comfortable in her own body than I was. It was petty for me to feel jealous when things were so screwed up, but I shot her an irritated glance anyway.

“
Which part?” I grumbled, wrapping my cold hands more firmly around the hot mug.

She rolled her eyes, “The first part, dork. Dr. Fleming’s visit?”

“
Oh.” That heavy feeling of depression sank back into me, “He had some news.”

“
News about what?”

I took a shaky breath and looked at her, “It’s bad, Katie-bug.”

When I began to explain about what really happened to our mother, I tried not to notice how her expression faltered. I hated watching the light in her eyes go dull and dark. Then angry.

She slammed a hand down on the coffee table but I was not able to grab my coffee before some it sloshed onto the glass top.

“
What kind of mother does that?” She rose from her seat and began pacing across the porch, seething with the news that she did actually have a mother, but that mother had chosen to leave her children.

“
I don’t know the reason, Katie. But we have some information to go on. If you want to find out. If you want to talk to her.” I really hoped she would not want to go that route.

She stopped and stared at me for a moment, as if seeing me for the first time. There was desperation in that familiar face. There was anger, hurt and questions begging to be asked. However, for the first time in her life, Katie used one of my own tactics against emotional trauma. She quite suddenly cut herself out of it.

Facing the screened window, she took several long deep breaths and then her shoulders slumped.

“
Doesn’t matter, does it?” She whispered.

“
It might. Alex said she had good reasons for leaving…” I started.

“
Alex? What the does he have to do with this?” Then she threw her hands up to prevent my answer, bent down to grab her shoes and turned away, “Forget it. I do not want to know. I wish you had never brought this up, Sarah.”

Nevertheless, I
needed
her. She knew me. She understood. What was she doing?

She disappeared into the house and I heard her quick steps tapping up the stairs to her room.

Nelly came out with a puzzled look on her face, “What was that all about?”

I leaned over, buried my face in my hands, and mumbled, “I told her about Mom still being alive.”

The cushion next to me sank as Nelly settled herself beside me, her familiar girth comforting me as I cursed myself for what I had revealed. She wrapped one heavy arm around me and pulled me close, “Oh, sweetie. I’m sorry.”

I lifted my head and met her sad eyes, “Why didn’t anyone tell me? Why didn’t
you
?”

She sighed, “You don’t know how many times I was tempted to do just that, honey.” The lines on her weathered face seemed deeper this morning and it occurred to me that this burden had been weighing her down for years. I tried to imagine being the caretaker of two small girls who had suddenly lost their mother. I had never considered what it might have cost her. Or why she stayed to take care of everything.

“
When Selena and your Dad started having problems, I tried to mind my own business.” She laced her fingers together on her lap and stared down at them. They were the hands of a working woman. Sometimes they would get so dry in the winter; her knuckles would crack and bleed. They were the same hands that wiped away tears, developed calluses by pushing brooms, pounded flour into dough for dinner rolls. She regarded them sadly as she spoke, “She started going into town more often. She started drinking. I guess your Dad was hoping it was a phase she was going through. She paid less attention to things around here. Every day, another new job was given to me to be responsible for.”

“
What changed?”

She shook her head slowly, “Oh, honey. Your Mom hated living out here. She didn’t want the responsibility of it. She did love your Dad, but it just wasn’t enough.”

Pain struck me like a lightning bolt. It was not enough. What about us, her own children? I felt the now-familiar hot and heavy tears begin to fill my eyes, and Nelly pulled me against her with both arms, “I know it’s hurtful. It seems impossible to you, honey. But some people just don’t bond with their children the way they should. It has nothing to do with you personally.” I wanted to push her away. Her betrayal was still a fresh wound to me. However, numbness had begun to push my angry thoughts into the background.

Katie suddenly flew through the door, a coat draped around her and barked out, “I’m going for a walk.”
   

Then Alex struck out after her with grim purpose darkening his eyes.  He glanced at me quickly as he followed Katie out.  I hoped he would calm her down.  More importantly, he needed to keep her away from the meadow.  The idea of my sister encountering Michael made me feel physically ill.

They returned an hour later.  I had been helping Nelly clean up the breakfast dishes and we both paused when Alex came through the door.  His expression was brooding.  I put away the bowl I had been drying and gave him a questioning look.

“
Katie’s decided to head back to school early.  She’s packing.”

Nelly went to him and laid a hand on his arm, “How’s she doing?  Any better?”

He shook his head slightly, “She’s confused and angry.  But with some time, I think she’ll be fine.”

“
I wish she’d stay.”  I said.

Then I heard her coming down the stairs and I went to meet her in the entry.  She had her bright blue backpack hanging over one shoulder.  Her eyes were red rimmed and bright with tears she had held back.  There was also an edge to her expression, anger so bright and fiery that I felt the need to take a step back. 

“
I’ll call you when I get back to the dorm.” She ground out.

“
Katie, please stay and talk to me about this.”

Her head shook in denial. “No.  I need some time.”

She pushed past me and left through the front door without a hug or even a sisterly farewell.  I watched her wrench open the passenger side door of her Jeep, throw her backpack in, slam the door, and march to the driver’s side.  I stayed there at the front door, watching as she drove down in the direction of the road.

Maybe I could have done something more.  I should have forced her to talk to me, to work this thing out and decide together where to go from here. However, how much could I tell her?  She had not asked to see the journal, and I hoped that she might have forgotten about it. 

The afternoon was waning when I went in search of Alex.  The golden light of the setting sun dusted everything with warmth.  The tops of the trees, the white trim of the windows on the outside of the house, the roof of the barn across the lane from Alex’s cabin.

I found him in the main aisle of the barn, running a currycomb through the mud on Messenger’s hindquarters.  Settling myself on a tack trunk near Messenger’s stall, I gritted my teeth and leaned with my elbows on my knees, staring at the concrete floor.