Read These Boots Were Made for Stomping Online
Authors: Julie Kenner
Tags: #Romance, #Fantasy, #General, #Fiction
“Okay,” she cried, coming out from around the table, all booted up. “Here goes.” She grabbed her foot with her hand and proceeded
to wrap a leg around her head. “How about this?”
“What are you doing?” he asked, trying to keep his voice from sounding incredulous.
“Duh. I’m showing you my superpowers.”
“Superpowers?” Collin shook his head. “You used to do that all the time when we had sex.”
She dropped her foot, looking totally bummed. Great. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but what was he supposed to do?
Applaud her Super Flex? He didn’t want to encourage her and her wild stories. Especially not when her latest conspiracy theory
had to do with the MeiyoSeraph Agency. The last thing he wanted to do was be associated with something that had the potential
to screw up the Hiro Kim deal. He could get fired. Blacklisted from Hollywood forever.
“Okay, watch this!” She waited for the aisle to clear, then proceeded to do a backflip. “Ta-dah!” she cried, looking at him
for approval.
He didn’t know what to say. “Congrats?”
“You don’t believe me.” She looked exasperated. “Well,” she added, “I also have Super Smell. Thomas drew that power into the
comic just last night to help me find your hotel room.”
Collin didn’t know whether to laugh or groan. “Wait a second. You’re telling me you can just give yourself new powers by drawing
them in?”
“Yup. So with Super Smell . . .” She sniffed the air. “I can determine you had pizza for lunch.”
“It doesn’t take Super Smell to determine that. The chef must have used three cloves of garlic on every slice.”
“Fine. You give me a power then.” She shoved the pad of paper in his direction. “And then I’ll demonstrate it and you’ll see
I’m telling the truth.”
“Why don’t you do it yourself?”
She cringed. “We kinda determined that only an official Karma Kitty artist can draw in powers and have them work. My stick
figures just weren’t cutting it.”
“Of course they weren’t.” He let out a deep sigh and flipped to a new page. “This is so stupid,” he muttered under his breath.
“Okay, done.” He held up the paper.
“It’s blank,” she said.
“Invisibility.” He reached out and touched her arm. “Which you don’t have, I hate to tell you.”
“Right. Sorry, I should have told you.” Of course she had a tidy explanation for this, too. “There are limits to her powers.
They’re only enhancements of things a cat could do already. So, for example, I can land on my feet or flip in the air, but
things like flying and invisibility won’t work. Nor will shooting dollar bills from my fingers. Trust me, Thomas tried.”
“How convenient.”
Hailey’s face was bright red. “You know what? Forget it. I don’t have to prove myself to you. If you don’t believe me, then
that’s your problem. I’ve got to go rescue Thomas from that bevy of ninjas before they kill him.” She stomped her foot for
emphasis, so hard he felt the floor tremble. Or maybe that was just his imagination. “Give me the address.”
“The address?”
“To MeyioSeraph. I need to go rescue my partner.”
“No way. I’m not going to have you go charging in there and getting into trouble.”
“I’ll be fine. I have superpowers, remember?”
Oh, he remembered all right. “Look, how about we call the police? Send them down to investigate,” he suggested, trying to
appease her.
“No way. By the time they get down there, it may be too late. Now give me the address.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m not going to do that. There’s too much at stake.”
“Fine. I don’t need it anyway. I’ll Super Smell my way there—just like I got to your hotel room last night.”
Collin let out a frustrated breath. This was going too far. It had to end. Now. “Don’t you ever get tired of playing these
little games, Hailey?” he asked.
“Don’t you ever get tired of being an unbelieving jerk?”
She was impossible. Simply impossible. So stubborn—once she got stuck in a lie, she’d lock onto it and never back down. The
alien thing on the wedding day was one thing, but this took the cake. Superpowers because of magical shoes? Come on! Did she
really think he just fell off the turnip truck?
She looked at him with her wide, sad, blue eyes. “You know, this is so not how I wanted our weekend to be,” she said. “I thought
maybe we’d have another chance. And I really tried to act normal, just for you. But I’m not. And I’ll never be. So you have
a choice. You either accept that I’m cursed with weirdness and start believing what I say or walk away now and never look
back.”
The quaver in her voice panged at his heart. This was it; he was going to lose her all over again. Suddenly, he wanted to
do whatever it took, just to stop her from walking away. Even if that meant indulging the crazy, just for a bit. He loved
her too much, he realized, to let her slip away again.
“Okay, fine,” he said, reaching into his pocket. “I have an address.” He read the card. “It’s down by the Meatpacking District;
some ware house, probably. Why don’t we go down and check it out?”
He felt safe doing this because, after all, he knew exactly what they’d find there at MeyioSeraph headquarters. Nothing. An
up-and-up agency, sans ninjas—at least, sans dangerous ones—just like the one he’d been dealing with all weekend. She’d be
disappointed but relieved, and Thomas would probably be back by the time they returned to the convention center.
Sure, he’d probably get in trouble with his boss for ditching his afternoon meetings, but he was golden boy today for the
Kim deal and they owed him. And if he didn’t go, there was no telling what Hailey might do, charging in un-chaperoned.
Her face brightened at his words, tears actually slipping down her cheeks. “So you believe me?” she asked. “You really do?”
He swallowed hard, not wanting to hurt her. “Sure,” he lied. “Now let’s go.”
The address turned out to be an industrial building down by the docks. Not exactly the type of place a regular agency would
hang its shingle, but maybe they were just getting started. Once they got their Hiro Kim payday, they’d be able to afford
nicer digs, that was for sure.
“Okay, pull over here,” Collin instructed as they cruised in front of the building. “I think this is it.”
The cabdriver obliged, pressing the button to stop the meter. A receipt spit out. Hailey reached for her wallet, but Collin
held out a hand to stop her. “I’ve got it,” he said.
“Maybe we should keep the cab here,” she suggested. “You know, in case we have to make a quick getaway.”
“You mind hanging here for a few?” Collin asked the cabbie.
The cabbie shrugged and reactivated the meter, turning up the radio.
“Okay, guess that’s a yes.”
“Now, Collin, I think it’s best if you wait in the car,” she said, glancing over at the building. “After all, you don’t have
superpowers.”
“No way. I’m coming in.” There was no chance he was letting her run off on her own when she was in such a state.
“Okay, fine. But try not to get in the way. I don’t want you to get hurt.” She popped out of the cab and started toward the
ware house. He had to sprint to catch up.
They walked into the building and into a well-lit lobby that led to a reception area with cushy chairs and a receptionist
behind a large desk, filing her red painted nails. Hailey stopped short, a confused look on her face. Obviously it wasn’t
the scene she was expecting. She glanced back at Collin. He stepped forward.
“I’m sorry to barge in here like this,” he said, sidling up to the receptionist and giving her his best smile—the one that
had won him so many movie contracts the last five years. “But I’m Collin Robinson from Darken Pictures and I’m interested
in talking with your client, Thomas Carol.”
The secretary stifled a yawn. “No one by that name is in the building,” she assured Collin after glancing down at a sign-in
sheet.
“I know you guys have him!” Hailey interrupted, slamming a fist against the desk. “If you touch a hair on his head, I’ll—I’ll
. . . I’ll go Karma Kitty on all your ninjas!”
The secretary raised a perfectly arched eyebrow. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she sniffed. “Ninjas?
Dear, we are a talent agency.”
“Look,” Collin replied, trying to smooth things over, “could we at least meet Mr. Redkin? He’s the one who approached me about
Thomas’s television rights.”
“Mr. Redkin’s in a meeting.”
“Fine. We’ll wait.”
“It’s likely to be a long meeting.”
“Well, then, it’s a good thing you’ve got a nice magazine selection.”
“Mr. Robinson, I’m sure if you just left your phone number . . .”
Collin led Hailey by the arm and sat her down in one of the cushy chairs. “Could you get us some water?” he asked the receptionist.
The woman huffed, but rose from her seat to oblige them. Once she was out of earshot, Collin turned to Hailey. “What the hell
do you think you’re doing?” he demanded.
“They’ve got Thomas! They could be torturing him as we speak!”
“Hailey, I think you’ve been reading too many comic books. Look around you. This is a legitimate, respectable talent agency.
No ninjas. No evil plans. Nothing.”
“I don’t expect you to believe me. You never do.”
He sighed, exasperated. “That’s because your ideas are always so far-fetched!”
They both fell silent. Hailey gritted her teeth as she grabbed a copy of the latest
In Style
Magazine, refusing to glance over at her doubting ex. Thomas was probably inside, right now, being brainwashed by the bad
guys, and they had to sit in a waiting area for some guy in a meeting who wouldn’t tell them the truth anyway.
The receptionist returned, handing Hailey and Collin bottles of water. Hailey strained her eyes to try to discover what was
going on down the corridor the woman had come from. If only she had gotten that invisibility power. Then she could sneak back
and see if Thomas was back there.
It was then that she remembered her Super Smell. She sucked in a breath through her nose, searching through the myriad smells
for something that would signal Thomas.
A moment later, she had it.
“Toxic!” she cried triumphantly, turning to Collin. “No one but Thomas would wear that cheesy Britney Spears perfume. He’s
here. He’s definitely here.”
Collin sighed. “Can you just wait, Hailey?”
But Hailey couldn’t wait. Not when her friend’s life was at stake. She bounced up from the couch and pranced over to the receptionist.
“Can I go to the bathroom?” she asked.
The woman gave her a dirty look but responded, “Down the hall, second door to the right.”
Hailey avoided Collin’s questioning eyes and headed down the hall. When she got to the bathroom, she opened the door, then
closed it again without going inside. Then she slunk down the corridor, sniffing occasionally, to find her friend. Thomas’s
smell grew stronger the farther back she walked. Hopefully he was still okay and they hadn’t tortured him too badly yet.
She weaved through empty cubicle after empty cubicle until she came to a dead end and a door. She sniffed. This was it! she
realized. Thomas was behind that door, she was sure of it. Heart pounding, she wrapped her hand around the knob and tried
to turn it. Locked. Damn. If only she’d had Karma Kitty lock-picking skills drawn in.
She froze as she heard voices approaching.
“Beth says that movie producer is outside in the lobby. Better go see what he wants.”
“The nerve of the guy, coming here.”
“Right? He wasn’t alone, either. Had some chick with him. Beth said she was acting crazy and babbling about the ninjas.”
“Hang on a second. She’s talking about the ninjas, blaming them? She could ruin everything!”
“Don’t worry, it’s not likely anyone’s going to believe her.”
“What about the producer? Obviously she’s told him.”
“Well, he can’t pull out of the Hiro deal now. It’s signed, sealed and delivered.”
“Thank God you pushed it through in time. Who knew the guy was going to commit hara-kiri when he came out of his hypnosis.”
“Supposedly the note said he was too shamed for selling out to Hollywood to live. Pathetic, huh? It’s just a fucking comic
book.”
“Artists!”
“And now we’re going to have to cover up his death. After all, it’s not going to look good for us once it’s announced.”
“Right. First things first, though. Why don’t you go out to the reception area and talk to Mr. Robinson? I’ll let loose the
ninjas, just in case we need them.”
“As if that will do much good. The ninjas you hired have been nothing but trouble this whole Comic Con. They’re not stealthy,
they’re not organized—hell, I even caught them throwing around those plastic shuriken we gave away at the booth because they
had run out of real ones.”
“Annoying. I knew I never should have gone with BudgetNinjas.com.”
“Totally. But we should be fine. I’ve got at least twenty hanging out in the back room eating sushi. Even sucky ninjas can
kick ass if there’s enough of them.”
“And next year, I suggest we go for pirates instead. After all, everyone knows pirates are way cooler than ninjas.”
The voices faded. Hailey let out a breath and stepped out from behind the cubicle. What was she going to do?
Collin glanced at his watch. Hailey hadn’t come back from the bathroom yet. She’d better not be poking around and get herself
arrested for trespassing. And if she did, she’d better not mention his name to the cops.
A man stepped into the lobby. Collin recognized him as Mr. Redkin, the man they’d been waiting for. He rose to greet him;
they shook hands.
Mr. Redkin glanced around the room, then turned to the receptionist. “Beth, I thought you said there was a girl with him.”
“Oh,” Collin said, before Beth could answer. “She went to the bathroom.”
Was that a flicker of worry crossing the man’s face? Mr. Redkin turned to Beth again and gave her a slight nod. She nodded
back and rose from her desk, heading for the back room. Great. Probably off to inform security. He was going to kill Hailey
when this was all over.
“So, is something wrong, Mr. Robinson?” asked Redkin, smiling a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
Collin felt his face grow red. “No, no,” he assured him. “It’s just . . . well, my friend who’s in the bathroom . . . she’s
the other half of the Karma Kitty property. And I happened to mention the pending deal with her partner, and she wanted more
information.”
“I see. And what information is she interested in learning?”
Collin wondered what they’d say if he mentioned the ninjas. Mentioned Hailey’s suspicions. Probably they’d laugh him out of
the office. Still, he remembered her earnest face. She seemed to really believe it. Maybe he should at least bring it up .
. .
But before he could speak, a cry cut across the room. A cry he’d know anywhere.
Hailey. She was in trouble!
Collin dove toward the hall. Mr. Redkin jumped in his path, ready to stop him. But Collin was expecting this move and had
his fist ready. He popped the agent in the nose and followed it with a left-handed slam to the stomach. The agent doubled
over in pain. Collin pushed by him and dashed down the corridor. He could hear Redkin laughing behind him.
“Watch out for the ninjas, Mr. Robinson.”
Collin stopped short at those words. Ninjas? Hailey had been right this whole time? How could he have refused to believe her?
He was a fool. An idiot. And now, because of his disbelief, she was in trouble. He had to save her!
He ran down the hall, heart slamming against his chest, praying over and over again that she would be okay. He whipped around
a corner and stopped dead in his tracks as he saw the ninjas with his own two eyes, saw that they hadn’t just been a promo
stunt at Comic Con. There had to be twenty of them filling up the narrow hallway. Armed with katanas and throwing stars and
even nunchakus. Were they all after Hailey? She didn’t stand a chance.
Suddenly a whirling dervish burst from the crowd, flying into the air like no normal human should be able to do without a
trampoline. Hailey. She came down kicking, knocking two of the ninjas in the head. They flailed backward, a domino effect
in the narrow hallway, and managed to fell at least four of their buddies.
And Hailey wasn’t done—not by a long shot, from the looks of it. She gave a loud cry and flipped backward, landed in a defensive
stance. Collin shook his head, unable to believe his eyes. In addition to the ninjas, she’d obviously been telling the truth
about her superpowers as well.
She was Karma Kitty. No doubt about it. He had been such a fool.
The standing ninjas lunged. There were so many of them. They fell on top of her, punching and kicking. She bravely fought
them off, but even with her superpowers, Collin realized she was fading fast. She didn’t have the stamina to fight them all.
If only she had some kind of super energy boost that came with the package.
His next thought hit him like a ten-ton truck. He could draw it! Just like Hailey had told him she had Thomas draw Super Smell
in order to help her locate his hotel room; he could give Hailey the power she needed with just a quick sketch . . .
Wait—what was he thinking? He should be calling the police. Or at least aiding her in the fight. Not that he’d be able to
do much against a tribe of ninjas. But anything was more worthwhile then simply picking up a pen.
Then again, they did say it was sometimes mightier than a sword.
“Why won’t you believe me?”
Hailey’s words echoed in his ears.
He squared his shoulders. Firmed his resolve. It was stupid. Impossible. Crazy. But he had to give it a try. She was telling
the truth about the rest of it; why not this, too?
He dove into a cubicle and grabbed a pad of paper, his hands trembling as he gripped the pencil. Besides the quick sketch
earlier that day, it’d been a long time since he’d drawn Karma Kitty. Could he still make the character come alive on the
page and provide Hailey the powers she needed? After all, she had told him only true Karma Kitty artists could make it happen.
He didn’t have time to play the doubt-in-his-art-abilities game. He started sketching, giving Karma Kitty huge muscles, retractable
claws, and fangs, and a more powerful club-like tail. Then he drew a speech bubble of her saying how she’d had her blood reworked
to give her ten times the strength and stamina she once had. Didn’t know if that would work, but it was certainly worth a
try.
He finished the drawing and signed his name. His breath came hard and heavy and his heart beat a million miles an hour. This
had better work. If it didn’t, Hailey would be dead. But at least she would know that for once, he believed her.
Hailey battled for breath. The ninjas were on her. She couldn’t hold them off anymore. She pawed and kicked, but there were
too many, and even with her powers they were too strong. She was going to die. It was all over. She thought of Collin and
all the missed opportunities they’d had because of a stupid misunderstanding.