These Foolish Things (4 page)

“Sorry. You’re right. I’ll remember that for next year. On
another note,” his voice became serious. “Any chance we can settle this thing
right here, right now?”

Liz shook her head, remembering Dan’s instructions. She knew
that, had she not been dealing with two of the most pig-headed men on the
planet, she could settle it without an appearance. However, Dan wanted his
courtroom fees and the client was happy to pursue the suit all the way to the
end.

“Today? I don’t think so, but I’ll be happy to take an offer
back to Mr. Randazzo after court.” Liz offered.

Ty looked at her thoughtfully. “Think you’re going to win?” he
asked.

Liz tried to be nonchalant. “I’d say my chances are good. My
client and Attorney Dennis have made it clear that they wish to argue the
motion. I’m just following my orders.”

Ty laughed softly, another sound that had a disturbing, yet
pleasurable effect on Liz. “They tried that line at Nuremberg. Didn’t work.”

Liz laughed. “You’re equating a wholesale plumbing supplies
contract with Nazi war crimes?”

“My client is,” said Ty and they both laughed. Liz felt the
familiar knot in her stomach she’d felt when he’d been tangled up with her. She
couldn’t let herself think along those lines. There was too much potential
pain.

“Forgive my asking, but Tyrone is a name you don’t hear very
often. Are you named for a family member?” Liz couldn’t believe she’d had the
nerve to ask.

Ty smiled. “My mother had a crush on Tyrone Power. Ever hear
of him?”

Don’t assume I’m ignorant, Counselor. “Yes, I have. ‘Witness
for the Prosecution’ is one of my all-time favorites, I’ve seen ‘Prince of
Foxes’ and I believe he played Zorro at least once. In addition, he was a very
handsome son of a gun and I see why your mother had a crush on him. Do I pass
the test?” Liz’s smile faded somewhere below her eyes.

Ty noticed the slight chill in her tone. “You pass. I’m
impressed. Most people don’t make the connection.” He smiled. “I guess I should
have learned not to assume anything where you’re concerned, Liz.”

The man’s innate charm was not lost on Liz, who squeezed one
hand into a fist. Don’t let him distract you, Girl, she reminded herself. Liz
smiled back at him. “A lot of people see the blonde hair and treat me as if I’m
the village idiot.” Her smile broadened. “Besides, I understand obsessed
mothers and how it affects their children.”

Ty looked puzzled. “I don’t understand.”

“My mother’s grand obsession was Pride and Prejudice,” Liz
explained. Ty nodded. Liz continued. “I don’t know how many times my mother
read the book and saw the movie. I’m guess I’m just happy she went with
‘Elizabeth’ and not ‘Greer Garson’.” Liz chuckled herself. “If I’d been a boy,
she might have named me Fitzwilliam or Darcy.”

Ty said so softly, Liz wasn’t sure she’d actually heard him
or imagined it, “I’m glad you weren’t a boy.”

Before she could question him about the comment, the bailiff
announced, “All rise.”

Ty and Liz hastily took their appropriate positions behind
their tables. The bailiff continued the announcement and Judge Francis L.
McCafferty entered the courtroom and made his way to the bench.

“Be seated.” They did.

The Honorable F.L. McCafferty was a large man, gray-haired
and round-faced. He had a pair of reading glasses perched on top of his head
which he flipped down to his nose as he settled himself onto the bench.
McCafferty conferred with his clerk for a moment. Liz felt her anxiety
beginning to rise again. She stole a look at the plaintiff’s counsel. Ty Hadley
looked as relaxed and at ease as she was nervous.

Dan’s nemesis didn’t look all that threatening. After all,
he was wearing a fuchsia bow tie under his round face. Slap a beard on him,
thought Liz, and you’d have Santa. And she wanted to laugh in spite of herself.

“Randazzo versus White.”

Liz heard Ty stand up. He was still on her blind side.
“Tyrone Hadley for the plaintiff, Your Honor.”

Liz saw McCafferty look thoughtfully at Ty. “Not your usual
caliber of clientele, Hadley. Kind of small potatoes for you, Counselor. He
your cousin?”

“No, Your Honor. Just a client.”

McCafferty nodded. He looked at Liz. She scrambled to her
feet, heart pounding. “Elizabeth Gardner for the defense, Your Honor.” Even as
she said it, Liz was amazed her voice didn’t crack or squeak from the stress.

McCafferty peered at her closely. “Where’s Attorney Dennis?”

“He had an emergency, Your Honor and since I’ve been working
very closely with him on this case, he felt a continuance was unnecessary and a
delay was not in the best interests of the client. I did file an appearance.” Where
in the hell did all that come from?

McCafferty was unimpressed. “Uh huh.” He looked at Ty. “Do
you have any objection to Brother Dennis’ shenanigans, Counselor?” Liz looked
at Ty, who glanced back at her and said, “No objections here, Your Honor.”

McCafferty nodded. “Very well. Let the record show that
Attorney Elizabeth Gardner is here to represent the defendant. Tell me,
Attorney Gardner, on what golf course or in whose boudoir is this ‘emergency’
taking place?” Before Liz could answer, McCafferty frowned and looked at her
closely for the first time. He beckoned her forward.

“Counsel, please approach the bench.” Liz did as she was
told, hearing Ty do the same. As she stood before the judge, McCafferty leaned
forward to study her right eye. Liz held still for the scrutiny. He sat back. “That’s
quite the shiner, Counselor. Very impressive.”

“Thank you, Your Honor. Anything worth doing is worth doing
well.” She heard Ty suppress a laugh and cover it with a cough.

McCafferty smiled. ‘You look like Tony Conigliaro.”

“Wrong eye, Sir,” Liz replied. “He got hit on the left.”

McCafferty chuckled. “Quite so. Still,” and he gestured to
Liz’s eye. “I’d hate to see the other guy.”

“That would be me, Judge,” Ty offered.

McCafferty’s head snapped in Ty’s direction. “You did that?”
he barked. Liz turned her head in time to see Ty nodding.

“Didn’t your mother tell you not to hit girls?” McCafferty
roared, “I’ve half a mind to call the cops, Counselor!”

“Your Honor, it wasn’t like that,” Liz began, but McCafferty
cut her off with a wave of his hand.

“Don’t you defend him, Missy!” the judge bellowed. “Do you
plan to protect him until he beats you to death?”

“Your Honor…” Ty began. McCafferty cut him off, too.

“Not a word, Attorney Hadley or I’ll hold you in contempt!” This
was too much for Liz and she matched McCafferty’s roar.

“YOUR HONOR! WOULD YOU PLEASE JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR THIRTY
SECONDS!”

Both men turned to look at her in astonishment. Liz’s heart
was still pounding and her mind racing, but dammit, the truth was going to be
heard. McCafferty glared at her.

“You’re courting a contempt citation, too, Counselor.
Remember where you are. This is my courtroom and I will have decorum, Missy.”

“I apologize, Your Honor, for the disturbance. But with all
due respect, I didn’t get this black eye from a lover’s quarrel.” Liz’s voice
was controlled, but loud and firm. “It’s true that Attorney Hadley hit me…”

“AHA!” McCafferty was triumphant.

Liz continued. “But the ‘hit’ was a collision at home plate
during a closely contested softball game, Your Honor.” Liz finished.

She thought she’d successfully made her point, but
McCafferty turned back to Ty. “And now you’ve got her defending you with some
cock and bull story!” Liz saw Ty get angry. Without thinking, she laid her hand
on his arm. Ty closed his mouth. Liz withdrew her hand and looked at
McCafferty, who had noted the gesture with a raised eyebrow.

“Your Honor, I promise you that’s the truth. I’m the catcher
for the Liti-Gators and we won the league championship because I prevented my
esteemed colleague here from scoring.”

Apparently, she had made her point. McCafferty blinked.
“You’re the one? he asked. Liz nodded. “Brad Rogers said it was a big mama
blocking the plate.”

Yeah, he would, thought Liz. Ex-boyfriends can be pretty
nasty.

“To the best of my recollection, Your Honor,” Ty began,
“Attorney Rogers was not at the game and therefore his information was not
first hand.” He gestured to Liz, “If he had witnessed the game, he could hardly
have described my esteemed colleague,” Ty slightly mocked Liz’s phrase, “in
such terms.”

“Thanks,” muttered Liz.

“Thank you, Attorney Hadley. I hope you packed your
toothbrush because that’s more than one more word and you are now in contempt,”
McCafferty replied calmly.

Both Liz and Ty were dumbfounded.

“Your Honor,” Liz protested, “this is a gross abuse of
judicial discretion! Surely you can’t be serious!”

“Serious as a heart attack, Counselor,” McCafferty
responded, still calm. “Do you wish to join him?” Liz shut her mouth. “Good.
Now, the only words I want to hear from the two of you are those related to the
case at bar. After arguments, we’ll discuss Attorney Hadley’s sentence.” McCafferty
looked at the pleading before him.

“Now then, I believe the defense has moved for summary
judgment in this case. I’ll hear arguments, but first, tell me the truth.”

“Your Honor?” Liz looked at him in bafflement.

“Dan Dennis didn’t write any of these pleadings, did he?” McCafferty
asked.

Crap. “No, Your Honor, Attorney Dennis didn’t write the
pleadings in this case.”

McCafferty nodded. “I didn’t think so. I may be a fucking
loon,” Liz looked at him sharply as he emphasized the words, “but Dennis is an
idiot. For the past eighteen months or so, his writing has shown a suspicious
improvement. How long have you worked for Attorney Dennis?”

“About 18 months, Your Honor,” Liz answered softly. She
stole a glance at Ty. His face was unreadable, but he looked thoughtful.

McCafferty nodded. “Thought so. I remember you. I heard your
moot court argument and you took my legal writing seminar at Essex, didn’t you?”

Liz nodded.

“Speak up,” McCafferty prompted.

“I hesitate to do so, Your Honor, as I do not wish to be in
contempt of court if my words do not pertain to the case at bar.” Liz looked
him straight in the eye as she said it. She heard Ty suppress another laugh.
One contempt charge coming up, she thought.

Or not. McCafferty leaned back and chuckled. “You got me.
Okay, proceed with your argument, Counselor.”

And Liz’s first courtroom appearance was underway. As she
verbalized the arguments outlined in her motion, Hadley did his part in
attempting to shoot holes in her arguments. Liz stood firm, becoming so
involved in the process that she forgot to be nervous or afraid, countering his
arguments and objections. McCafferty asked one or two questions of his own,
barked repeatedly at Ty and kept harrying him from the bench until the
arguments were concluded.

“Thank you. Attorney Gardner,” Judge McCafferty looked over
his reading glasses, “I’m granting your motion for summary judgment. Both of
you will have my opinion by the end of the week, although if I had my way, I’d
have the defense write it for me. Why do you work for an idiot like Dan Dennis?”

Liz looked him squarely in the eye, fighting back the urge
to kiss both men to celebrate her win, “Your Honor, Attorney Dennis gave me a
job. Your office didn’t.” She turned to look at Ty. “And neither did your firm,”
she said to him.

McCafferty looked at her in astonishment. “You’re kidding.”

“No, Your Honor. I applied for a clerkship and got a rather
snide letter from your Chief Clerk telling me, in not so many words, that my
grades weren’t good enough, I didn’t graduate from the correct law school in
the first place and I was too damned old. Apparently, whoever did the initial
screening of applicants didn’t get as far as my writing sample. Attorney
Hadley’s office was much along the same lines but more succinct.”

McCafferty leaned back in his seat. “Well, I’ll be damned.
I’ve been looking for a good excuse to get rid of that snotty pain-in-the-ass
Chief Clerk. I may have a job for you yet. And by the way, Young Lady,” Here he
plucked at his robe, “Only the one wearing the black robe gets to swear in the
courtroom. Remember that for future reference.”

Liz couldn’t resist. “Does this mean I just earned a
contempt citation, Your Honor? Will I be in the cell next to Attorney Hadley?” She
heard Ty cough as he covered a laugh.

McCafferty didn’t laugh. He didn’t look angry, either. “You
two wait here. I declare a 10 minute recess.”

“All rise” as the judge left the courtroom and Liz’s first
day in court was concluded. With a win.

She went back to the defense table and covered up her
shaking by carefully putting files back into her briefcase. Her eye and head
were throbbing. Liz searched her purse for some kind of pain relief. All she
found were breath mints and a pack of bubble gum. Sugarless.

“Here.”

A masculine hand held out two tablets of extra-strength pain
reliever, Liz’s drug of choice. She looked up at Ty. He had a glass of water in
the other hand. Liz took both the water and pills from him with a grateful,
“Thanks. How did you know?”

“I didn’t. But, I figured that if I was wearing that shiner,
I’d probably be hurting, too. I can personally recommend this brand, especially
for hangovers,” He said it casually. “Congratulations on your first win,
Counselor.”

Liz washed down the pills with a good-sized swallow of
water. “Thanks.” She had no idea what else to say. “What happens next?”

Ty shrugged, “I tell White he lost. I didn’t think the case
had much of a chance in the first place and I told him so.”

Liz looked at him curiously. “So why’d you take it?”

Ty smiled. “He was my first client and he’s brought me a lot
of other clients over time. I owed him one. Besides, you’ll learn that he and
Randazzo have this ongoing legal feud. They’ve been at it for years. If it’s
not one thing, it’s something else with those two and it’s all trivial.” His
smile broadened. “Sal Randazzo will probably have you back in court suing my
client within six months.”