Theta (11 page)

I don’t know.
I returned to my task of sweeping up the broken
glass.

“
Why is this relic so
important to you that you came so far?”

“
How do you know how far
I’ve come?” I asked.

“
You stand out. You aren’t
from around here.” There was warmth in Menelaus’ voice.

“
It doesn’t matter
anymore.”

“
Does it have anything to
do with why you sprout wings and fly?”

I looked up sharply. His eyes were
whiskey-hued once more. The subtle change wasn’t caused by light,
because he was seated facing away from the sunlight spilling
through the windows.

“
My bladder is old, too. I
woke up and saw you transform into a … thing,” Menelaus said. “I’ve
seen a lot in my years. That was one of the most intriguing. You
are strangely beautiful, for such an ugly thing.”

I studied him, uncertain how anyone could
witness my transformation firsthand and react this calmly. “You are
not afraid?” I asked.

“
I am too old to fear
anything anymore,” Menelaus said. “If you wanted to eat me, you
would have already, wouldn’t you?”

The corner of my lips lifted in a half
smile. “Yeah.”

“
I’ve grown wise.” Menelaus
tapped his temple. “I have always had an affinity for animals and
hunting. Are you a man who transforms into a beast, or a beast who
becomes a man?”

“
I’m not sure there’s a
difference.” I returned to my cleaning and finished checking the
floor for any shards of glass I missed. “I am both at all times, no
matter what I appear to be.”

Menelaus was quiet, eating his breakfast. I
straightened the kitchen, frustrated further by the information
about the ruins offshore. I began to think Artemis had forced me
away from DC for nefarious reasons. She had called in the oath I
gave as a prince, but perhaps, I should not have honored it.

I didn’t understand who I was, and what role
I played, in the bigger scheme of things. Alessandra’s birth was
prophecy, and every other player in the ring with her had a part to
play. I was a wild card, more so after I regained my memories and
began to realize I didn’t belong in this time or this place at all.
I had hoped the discovery of my name would shed light on my purpose
or at least, complete the puzzle of who I had been in my past in
the hopes I might learn who I could become.

“
Will you leave, now that
you know your search is over?” Menelaus asked when he finished
eating.

“
I should,” I
replied.

“
If you stay until I can
care for myself, I will send you away with my infamous dried
fish.”

No reward will make up for
the latest slight by a deity.
I preferred
raw meat anyway. I glanced at the old man’s exposed knee. The
swelling was half what it had been. “I can stay a couple of days
but no more. It’s a long journey to where I must go.”

“
I will be grateful for the
company, and so will the boys.” The skin around Menelaus’ eyes –
which were dark brown once more – crinkled when he glanced towards
his pets.

I didn’t sense a god, as I had when I met
Cyamites, but something about Menelaus was … different. I couldn’t
pinpoint what.

“
What’s it like to
fly?”

“
Pure freedom,” I said
without hesitation.

Menelaus sighed. “I hope your bones never
give out on you, and you can fly forever.”

“
So do I,” I
answered.
But I’m almost certain the world
will end before I have a chance to grow old.

“
Since you are here to
help, can you bring in the basket of fruit in the garden?” Menelaus
asked.

I replaced the broom and left for the
garden. The brilliant blue-green sea caught my attention again, and
I sought to feel my connection to Alessandra.

It wasn’t there. Something had to be
wrong.

I couldn’t remain here much longer, whether
or not I found what I sought.

“
Come back,
Lyssa.”

With those three words, the vision
shattered. The ground felt like it dropped out from beneath my
feet. The scenes playing out before me broke and fizzled away, out
of existence. The answers had been here. All of them. Everything I
needed to know had been right in front of me.

Unlike the first, this premonition was more
fragile than a dream. I tried to force my mind to remember one tiny
fragment of everything I’d seen. Colors, faces, and places – they
slid through my hands and thoughts like fine sand and poured into
the void far below me.

No, no, no!
I was screaming and helpless as I fell out of the
vision, grasping at whispers. I had to remember something …
anything …

Adonis. His face flashed before he, too,
disappeared into the abyss.

My eyes flew open, and I
sat up before I registered where I was. Voices swirled in my
thoughts, the same ones I’d been hearing since Lantos gave the
deities the ability to speak to me. It was rare when I could
actually understand them, but for a moment, I had been addressing
them. I had looked into the past, present, future – and I’d
understood
everything
. Everything that ever had been. Everything that ever was.
Everything that ever would be.

And now, everything was gone, except for the
lingering image of Adonis.

I uttered the foulest curse Herakles had
ever taught me and flung off my bedding. My head throbbed, and I
flinched when the bottoms of my feet touched the cold marble floor.
My eyes went up automatically to the wall with purple names
scrawled across it.

At once, my mind quieted. No matter what I
felt or thought upon entering my room, the memorial wall distilled
it all, grounded me, and turned my focus towards solid resolve.

Two emotions settled into me as I gazed at
the names on the wall. The first, regret, was mine. The second,
satisfaction, emanated from the burr that was Cleon in my mind.

I whirled, expecting to find him in my
room.

He was nowhere to be seen – but Leandra and
Niko were standing beside the seated Dr. Khan, Cleon’s personal
physician who patched me up from time to time. The three of them
displayed different expressions, but their silence and stillness
was enough to tell me all of them were surprised.

“
How are you feeling?” Dr.
Khan was the first to speak. The slender woman of Middle Eastern
background stood and approached me, a stethoscope draped around her
neck.

“
Fine, I guess,” I replied
and glanced down. My body moved well, and I experienced no pain,
which made the physician’s presence unwarranted. My stomach
growled, and I patted it. “Why? What happened?”

“
The Supreme Magistrate’s
monkey used too much tranquilizer on you,” Leandra replied icily
with a sharp look at Niko.

“
I used the same amount as
usual. This
episode
was something entirely different,” Niko replied calmly.
“Something to do with her powers.”

“
Don’t be ridiculous,”
Leandra snapped and trailed Dr. Khan towards me.

“
So what’s going on?” I
asked, puzzled. “Niko tranqs me all the time. I never had a welcome
home party waiting for me when I woke up.”

“
Niko’s use of animal
tranquilizers on a young woman is another matter entirely.” Dr.
Khan gave the former mercenary a look of disapproval before her
concerned gaze returned to me. “Whatever happened, you’ve been
asleep for three days.”

“
That explains being
hungry,” I murmured. I thought back to the last thing I remembered
and frowned.

Cleon had been murdering the Ambassador of
Greece when Niko tranquilized me. A sense of euphoria – distinctly
not mine – floated through me as I recalled the man’s swollen face.
I instinctively reached to the scar at the back of my head, where
the chip was implanted into my brain.

Before, I’d been aware of
Cleon being in my head without really feeling him. I didn’t like
the idea of experiencing his emotions in response to
my
memories any more than
I wanted him using my power.

“
I need to do a quick
exam,” Dr. Khan said. “Would you like to sit down?”

With a shrug, I went to the chaise in the
bay window, across the room from my audience. The physician took my
pulse then checked my pupils, heart, reflexes and lungs.

“
I’m not seeing anything of
concern,” she said.

“
I don’t feel right,” I
said. “But it has nothing to do with my body or the
tranquilizers.”

“
Thank you,” Niko
growled.

“
What doesn’t feel right?”
Dr. Khan asked.

“
My involuntary brain
surgery.” I rubbed the spot again. “Something is
different.”

“
I’d like to get you in for
a CAT scan.”

“
No,” Niko
responded.

She pursed her lips before twisting to face
him. “If the chip has moved, or is damaging her spinal cord or
other parts of her brain, we need to know.”

“
No.”

I wasn’t the only one resenting Niko in that
moment. Dr. Khan made no more objections. She stood. “I’m done
here,” she said. “Whatever happened, I can’t explain it, but she
seems fine. I would advise – again – very strongly against using
tranquilizers on her, Niko. They were designed to bring down a
rhino or elephant, never to be used on humans.”

Elephant?

Cleon’s emotion was one of amusement.

Agitated to hear Niko had been using such
powerful sedatives on me, I wasn’t surprised when he pointed to the
door in response to Dr. Khan’s concern.

The physician left, and Niko studied me. No
part of me was about to tell him I had begun having visions. If I
was truly asleep for three days, and I couldn’t recall anything, it
would sound foolish to admit it anyway.

“
I’ll let Cleon know you’re
well enough to return to your duties,” Niko said. He walked slowly
to the door.

“
He already knows,” I
replied. “Whatever you all did to me, it’s getting
worse.”

He said nothing and left.

No sooner had the door closed than Leandra
was at my side, features tight. “What did you see?” she asked and
sank onto the chaise beside me.

Cleon’s interest piqued as well.

“
Nothing. Everything.” I
wiped my face, frustrated. “I forgot it all as I was waking
up.”

“
You forgot three days
worth of visions?”

“
Yeah.”

She released a breath.

“
I can feel Cleon in my
head,” I told her. “And he’s aware of everything I’m doing and
going through.”

Surprise crossed her pretty features.
“Everything?”

“
I think so. I can feel his
emotions.”

“
Then you should be careful
of discussing anything you don’t want him to find out,” Leandra
advised. Her surprise turned to alarm, and the meaning behind her
words shot through us both.

We couldn’t talk as we used to – about
Theodocia or the insurgency or even the visions, if I didn’t want
him to find out. If I’d struggled before, how was I going to deal
with him now, when he had insight into everything I did or
said?

“
I’ll bring you some
lunch,” Leandra said and rose. She strode to the door and left,
leaving me alone with my scary thoughts.

Surely there had to be something I could do
that Cleon wouldn’t see. Could he read my mind?

I sensed he didn’t yet have this capability,
or his emotions responding to what I thought of him and my
situation would probably be much more apparent. He had no problems
seeing what I did, to include the images of memories that popped up
in my head. Could I assume he was aware of only pictures, not
thoughts?

I didn’t like this development at all.

My eyes fell to the names on the wall again.
His positive emotion about the event that cemented his position at
the top – and left over three thousand people dead – repulsed
me.

At the familiar sound of shuffling, I looked
around for the animated teddy bear from my past that Adonis had
left with me.

“
Mrs. Nettles?” I called
softly.

The rustling came from beneath the chaise. I
dropped to my knees and plucked the animal – a cross between a
teddy bear and a cat I had created when I was five – from beneath
the chaise.

Awake,
she observed.

“
I am,” I replied. “Were
you hiding?”

She nodded, tugging at one of her oversized
ears with her stubby arms. She purred like a cat and had the
appearance of a stuffed koala bear. Whenever I saw her, I smiled,
recalling when I’d brought her to life. Adonis had protected and
cared for her for twelve years before she found her way back to
me.

As a child, I’d understood more about how to
use my power than I did now. Or maybe … I played with it, without
the fear of unleashing the apocalypse.

“
When I was little, I used
to do amazing things, didn’t I?” I asked her.

She nodded again.

Cleon was intrigued.

I didn’t like the idea of him knowing what I
was doing and being aware of how strong I became. But I didn’t see
much of a choice, either. Whenever I started to back away from what
I was supposed to be, the memorial wall reminded me of what
happened if Cleon or I unleashed my power. The image of the world
ending in flame and darkness challenged my desire to obey Cecelia
and repress my power. I tried that approach for weeks, and it
clearly didn’t work. Cleon was growing stronger, and I had to stay
ahead somehow.