Things Remembered (25 page)
Karla could have kissed her. “I'll get it for you.”
“I thought the line wasâif I wanted it, I could get it for myself.”
“You made pies?” Heather said to Anna. “You were supposed to leave everything to us.”
“I didn't make them, Karla did.”
“Karla? You're kidding. This I have to see.” Heather followed Karla into the kitchen.
“Don't worry,” Karla said. “They're just pies. I'm not after your home economics crown.”
“My, my, aren't we touchy. I was just surprised, that's all. I know you don't like to cook, let alone bake.”
“It's not as if it were hard. Anyone can make a pie.”
“You bought them, didn't you?”
Grace came up behind then and put an arm around each of their shoulders. “I believe in sibling rivalry, but over a pie? Why don't you save it for something importantâlike which of us is the prettiest or who Grandma loves best.”
The fight abandoned Karla. “This is really embarrassing.”
“Do you think Grandma and Bill could hear us?”
“They're too busy talking about who the Republicans are going to run for president to pay any attention to us,” Grace said.
Heather made a face. “Politicsâugh. I'm not sure I want to go back. Anyone for pie in the kitchen?”
“
Homemade
pie in the kitchen,” Karla said as she got them out of the refrigerator.
“I have to admit, they look pretty good for store-bought,” Heather said, looking over her shoulder.
“You know, I never understood the humor in pie throwing. Until now.”
Heather put up her hand to ward off the blow. “I'll tell Grandma.”
Grace protested, “That's my line.”
For the next five minutes they laughed and bumped and jostled and teased and became the grown-up family they'd never been. As much joy as the moment brought, the poignancy of knowing it would likely never happen again hung like a thick blanket of fog ready to envelop each of them. “We should do this again for Christmas,” Karla said surprising herself as much as her sisters.
“Only let's do it at my house,” Heather said.
“No, it has to be here.” Anna's house was a part of their history, the knot that held them together. If they were to become a real family again, the seeds had to be planted and nurtured here.
“I can't,” Heather said. “My doctor won't let me travel anymore after this.”
“That's crazy,” Grace told her. “I have a lot of friends who've traveled right up to their due date. And a lot farther than between here and Salinas.”
“Unless there was something wrong in the pregnancy.” Karla studied Heather. “Is there?”
“After that little problem I had with Jason, my doctor is being cautious that's all. He doesn't want me going into labor anywhere but at home, where he can be at the delivery.”
Grace dumped the whipping cream into a bowl. “Then I don't see the problem.”
Of the three of them, Karla had expected Grace would be the most difficult to convince, especially after the battle she'd had getting her to come for Thanksgiving.
“Grandma always comes to our house for Christmas. She loves watching the boys open their presents.”
“Well, far be it from me and Karla to mess up your little tradition.” Grace turned on the mixer, effectively ending the conversation and giving herself the last word.
Karla folded the dishtowel and hung it over the stove handle, then reached for a canister under the sink. “I'm going to feed the birds.”
Heather finished wiping the counter. “Wait a minute and I'll go with you.”
Karla had come up with the idea because she needed a few minutes alone. The constant shifting from near-euphoria to battle between the three of them had finally worn her down. “You've hardly had any time with Anna. Why don't you visit with her awhile?”
“Shouldn't she be getting ready for bed soon?” Grace asked. “I thought she'd reached the point where she slept most of the time.”
Karla frowned. “What point is that?”
“I don't know, I just remember reading somewhere that the worse her heart gets, the less energy she'll have, and that eventually she'll be spending more and more time in bed until she doesn't get up anymore.” She worked the broom into a corner. “You went to one of her appointments, didn't you?” she asked Karla. “What did the doctor say?”
Grace had tried too hard to sound casual when she should have sounded concerned. Karla wondered if it was bad acting or bad mental directing. “He's encouraged by how well Anna is doing.” When that didn't get a response, she added, “He said if she continues to take care of herself the way she has, there's no reason she couldn't live several more years.”
Grace wasn't a good enough actor to hide the fact that the news upset her. What she didn't reveal was why, and Karla couldn't come up with an answer that made sense. “I'll be outside if anyone needs me.”
She stopped to put on a jacket, the old one Anna kept in the front closet and saved for working in the yard. The sky was clear, the temperature crisp. She took a minute to look at the stars, spotted the Big and Little Dippers, but not the Milky Way she'd seen as a teenager from Anna's backyard. During dinner Grace and Heather had talked about the campouts they'd had in the backyard, about hearing coyotes during the night and waking to find a skunk eating one of their sandwiches. All Karla could do was listen. She'd always believed herself an important part of her sisters' childhoods. During the past two days she'd learned that in her rush to get away from Anna, she'd left before the truly memorable times had occurred.
Karla opened the can and scooped the shelled sunflower seeds into the measuring cup, allocating a half cup to each feeder. The tube style she had to take down to fill; one required her to sit on the ground with the feeder balanced between her legs. She tried to imagine how Anna accomplished the task.
As she hung the feeder back on its hook, she looked up and saw Grace coming toward her.
“I need to talk to you,” she said, hugging herself against the cold.
“I'll be through in a minute. I just have the one by the fence left to fill.”
Grace followed her across the yard. “I'm in trouble.”
Karla was stopped as much by the frightened tone she detected in Grace's voice as her words. She put the can and feeder on the ground and gave Grace her full attention. “What kind of trouble?”
“I owe a lot of people a lot of money and I can't put them off much longer.”
“I don't understand. We just went over your bills a month ago and you were doing all right. At least well enough to buy a new car.”
“I didn't show you everything. I knew it would upset you if you found out how much I really owe, and it didn't seem necessary at the time.”
“Something's changed since then, I take it?”
“I thought Grandma was a lot sicker than she is.”
It took a second for what Grace was telling her to sink in. When it did, Karla was so angry she had to shove her hands into her pockets to keep them still. “Precisely how much money were you counting on her leaving you?”
“I talked to a real-estate agent, and he told me the house should be worth a minimum of two hundred and fifty thousand, considering how much land goes with it. I don't know for sure how much Mom and Dad left us, but there had to be life insurance policies, and that guy who hit them was rich, so there had to be a settlement there. As tight as Grandma has been with that money all these years, even if she's only had it earning minimum interest, the way I figured it with the house and everything else divided three ways, we should each have around a hundred and fifty, maybe even two hundred thousand coming to us.”
“How long have you been counting on this money?”
“Don't make me out to be some ghoul, Karla. It's not as if the same thing hasn't occurred to you and Heather. I'm just more honest. Grandma is eighty-five. She can't live forever. Besides, that money is ours. Mom and Dad left it to us, not her.”
“I had no idea a will had been found. When did this happen?”
“All right, I accept that you're upset with me. I should have told you I was having problems, but that's no reason to act like a jerk about this.”
Usually Karla was caught off guard when Grace maneuvered her into a defensive position; this time she was prepared. “You haven't seen anything yet.”
With that, Grace started to cry. “I'm saying this all wrong. I came to you for help. You know I wouldn't ask if I weren't desperate. You're the only one I can turn to. My life is collapsing around me.” She made a hiccuping sound that turned into a sob. “And just when I'm on the verge of getting my big break.”
To an outsider, Grace's speech would be laughable. Karla felt sick to her stomach. “I'm curiousâwhat do you expect me to do?”
“Loan me enough to get by until . . .” She let the rest hang, unspoken.
“Grandma dies?” Karla finished for her.
“Yes. Are you satisfied?” Fresh tears spilled onto her cheeks. “And you don't have to tell me how bad this sounds. I already know. I feel terrible about this. There's nothing you can say that I haven't already said to myself. But that doesn't change a thing. I need you, Karla. You have to help me.”
“I can't.”
“Can't or won't?” Grace shot back, angry now. “Waitâforget I said that. I'm taking this out on you and I shouldn't. It's just that I'm so scared I don't know what I'm saying half the time anymore.” She sent Karla a pleading look. “I'll never ask you for another thing as long as I live.”
“Who do you owe money to that has you so scared?”
“I haven't paid my share of the rent in three months. Judy said if I didn't come back with the money, she was going to throw me out and dump all my things on the sidewalk. I have thirty-two credit cards maxed out and can't even make minimum payments on half of them. I had to borrow the gas money to come up here. If you don't help me, I don't know what I'll do.”
“File for bankruptcy.”
Finally, Karla had said something that reached her. “Do you know what that would mean? I'd have to give up my charge cards. They're the only thing that gets me through some months. How would I live?”
Karla had never felt so tired. “I don't want to talk about this anymore. You're on your own this time, Grace. I'm not going to bail you out. As a matter of fact, I'm going to have the bank take back the car now that I know you never had any intention of making the payments.”
“You can't do that. How will I get to my auditions?”
“I don't know. And, what's more, I don't care anymore. If it's something you want, you'll find a way.”
“I only came to you because I knew you wouldn't want me going to Grandma. But now I have to. I've worked too hard to get where I am to give up on my dream now. You have no idea what it is to want something so badly you're willing to sacrifice anything to get it.”
“I'd be more impressed if you were the one making the sacrifices, but it's me you come to when you're in trouble. Me and Grandma. And for all I know, you've sucked Heather into your problems, too.”
“So Grandma
has
been talking about me.” Again the pleading look turned to anger.
“Be careful, Grace. If you have a champion, it's Anna. If anyone has sacrificed themselves for something they believed in, she did. Only it wasn't for herself, it was for us.”
“She got paid.”
Karla had never hit one of her sisters and was as surprised as Grace when she slapped her across the face. “You ungrateful little bitch.”
“That's
our
money,” Grace shouted as she backed away. “She had no right to keep it from us.”
“
There is no money,”
Karla said. The words hit Grace as hard as Karla's hand. “Not a dime. Anna doesn't even own the house anymore. She sold it to pay your college tuition.”
“You're lying.” Her eyes pleaded with Karla to tell her it was so. “She's still here.” A glimmer of hope surfaced. “You have to be lying.”
“She took a reverse mortgage that lets her stay here until she dies or moves to a full-time nursing facility.”
“What about our money?”
“I told you, there is no money. As far as I could see, there never was.”
“She's got it hidden somewhere. She has to. You said yourself that you heard her talking about it to her friends that day when they were playing cards.”
“Why would I lie to you about this now, Grace?”
“Because you hate me. You're jealous. You always have been.”
“And that's why I've been supporting you all these years?”
“You feel guilty.”
Karla almost laughed. “Jealous and guilty, huh? What about love?”
“If you loved me, you'd help me.”
“This is where I came in.” Karla headed back toward the house.
“What am I going to do?” Grace wailed.
If ever there was an appropriate moment to quote Rhett Butler's final line in
Gone with the Wind
, this was it. She refrained, knowing the irony would be wasted on Grace.
With every step her legs grew heavier. She didn't want to go back inside. She couldn't face her grandmother, not yet. She wasn't the actress Grace was. Anna would know something was wrong.
She put the seed can on the porch and started walking, not knowing where she was going, only that she had to get away.
M
ark's headlights illuminated the front of his house as he made the turn into his driveway. For an instant he was sure he'd seen someone sitting on the porch but decided it was a shadow from one of the bushes. He either had to hire someone to do some pruning around the place or take time off to do it himself. Another six months and he'd have to use a machete to hack his way to the front door.
