Third Date (3 page)

“Then you can set me up, too. Go ahead. Both of you try to find me someone.”

“Hold on.” Kayla swipes her napkin over her mouth. “I don’t understand this. Why the sudden change? You go from dating nobody to wanting to go on dates with total strangers?”

“Well, technically if you guys know them, then they’re not total strangers.”
 

“You know what I mean. What’s the deal with you?”

“It’s my dad. He sold the house and now he’s moving to Texas with his fiancé.”

“So your dad’s moving. What does that have to do with anything?”

I sip my water. “He’s not just moving in the literal sense. He’s getting married. Leaving Minnesota. He’s moving on with his life. And I’ve decided I need to do the same. It’s time. I can’t sit at home alone in my apartment for the rest of my life.”

“Well, thank God you finally realized that.” Kayla goes back to eating her burrito. “So when does this new life of yours begin?”

“Today. I’ve already started making a list of all the things I want to do. And one of those things is to go out more. Be more adventurous. Try new things. And start dating again.”

“I know the perfect guy for you,” Paige says. “He works at Michael’s firm. He’s super nice. Comes from a great family. Really good looking. You’re going to love him.”

“He sounds like a total bore.” Kayla reaches in her purse and pulls out her lipstick. “You know what you need, Morgan? A guy who will give you the best sex of your life. But it’s going to take a few tries before you find that. Sometimes you think a guy’s going to be good in bed and are sadly disappointed. But I’m getting better at picking this stuff out so—”

“She’s not looking for a one-night stand,” Paige says. “She wants a relationship. With a nice guy who wants more than just sex. Right, Morgan?”

“Um, I don’t know. I guess I’m not sure what I want.”

“Well, you’re not a slut so I know you don’t want to just find a guy to have sex with.” Paige glares at Kayla.
 

“And she’s not an old married lady who’s no longer interested in sex either,” Kayla snaps back.

“You don’t know anything about my sex life so—”

“Okay, both of you just stop.” I hesitate, not sure if I really want to tell them this. But if they’re going to set me up, they need to know. “I have something to tell you guys and I can’t say it here. Can you come over tonight after work?”

They both grab their phones.
 

“Michael has to work late so yeah, I can come over,” Paige says.

Kayla is smiling as she scans her messages. “Yeah, I can cancel on this guy. We were gonna grab a drink after work, but I’m not interested. So sure, I’ll come over.”

“Great. Then I’ll see you tonight.”

Chase walks into the break room as we’re tossing our trash away. “Hey, Morgan. Any problems getting your lunch out of the freezer? I had it wedged in there so tight I didn’t think you’d ever get it out.”

“I got it. Thanks again for your help. I may need you again tomorrow.”

He laughs. “At least I’m good for something.”

Kayla’s eyes follow him to the freezer and watch as he opens it.
 

He glances back and catches her staring. “See something you like?”

“What?” Kayla, the girl who never lets a guy get to her, is completely flustered.

“In the freezer.” He points to it, smiling at her. “They’ve got some ice cream treats in here.”

“Oh, um, no. I don’t want anything.”

He shuts the freezer and steps right in front of her, making her cheeks blush for what might be the first time ever. She’s not the blushing type. “So did you make it to that club last night?”

“No. I got busy.”

“You did, huh?” He chuckles. “Anyone I know?”

“What? No. That’s not what I meant!”

“I was joking.” He runs his hand down her arm and I swear she stops breathing. “Sorry about that. That was inappropriate.”

“It’s fine.” She smiles. “Actually, it sounds like something
I
would say.”

He lets go of her arm but keeps his eyes on hers. “So I guess I’ll see you later.”
 

“Yeah. See ya, Chase.” She leaves before he can say anything else.

“What was that about?” Paige asks Kayla when we’re back in the lab. “You’ve got a thing for the guy in the finance department?”

“I don’t have a thing for him.” She drops the folder she was holding and papers fly out all over the floor. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“They went out one time last summer,” I say to Paige.

“Thanks a lot, Morgan,” Kayla says, bending down to collect the fallen papers. “Like you really needed to tell her that.”

“You had sex with Chase?” Paige whispers.
 

“Why are you whispering? It’s not like he can hear you.” Kayla stands up and sets the stack of papers on the counter. “And why do you assume we had sex? We could’ve just went out for dinner.”

Paige nods. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

I look at Kayla to fess up, but she doesn’t, so I say, “Don’t feel bad, Paige. She
did
have sex with him.”

“Dammit, Morgan!” Kayla takes some clean beakers from the cabinet. “That was not supposed to be public knowledge.”

Paige doesn’t seem that surprised. “Isn’t he the guy who organized the volunteer house-building project last fall?” She pauses to think. “Yeah, that’s him. I was on his team. He knows a lot about construction.”

Kayla walks up to Paige. “Now that you know this, don’t start acting weird around him or making stupid comments about me to him.”

“Relax. I never even see the guy.”

“Yeah, well, he’s working on this floor for a few weeks so you’ll see him a lot now.”

I join them at Paige’s workstation. “You need to go out with him, Kayla. There’s some definite chemistry between you two.”

“He’s a numbers guy. I don’t do numbers guys.” She smiles. ”Well, I DO them, but I don’t date them. And I only do them once. After that the sex gets boring and repetitive.”

Paige chooses to ignore the comment which was basically an insult to her husband, who is also a numbers guy.
 

“That’s why I go for the creative types.” Kayla takes the plastic containers of cereal samples out of the cabinet behind her. “Artists. Musicians. They’re up for anything.”

“You’re a scientist, Kayla,” I say. “You’re just like the numbers guy. Science and math people aren’t that different.”

She opens one of the containers and holds up a flake of cereal. “I create things. New flavors. New products. That’s way different than sitting at a desk all day typing numbers into a spreadsheet.”

Paige and I give each other a look. I know she’s thinking what I’m thinking. Kayla has a thing for the numbers guy.

***

Paige and Kayla arrive at my apartment at 7. Not having done much hosting of guests, I’m not sure what to serve them, so I set out some of the cheeses suggested by my wine club. I add a plate of crackers and some grapes, along with a couple bottles of red wine.
 

“This is nice,” Paige says when she sees the cheese tray I’ve set out. “Michael and I should join your wine club. It sounds fun.”

“See Morgan? Wine club is for couples.” Kayla pours herself a glass of wine. “If you want to find a man, you need to ditch that wine club and hang out at a bar.”

I gulp down my glass of wine, trying to get the courage to tell them what I need to tell them. “Speaking of men, that’s why I asked you over tonight. I need some advice.”

Kayla smiles. “This sounds interesting. Go ahead.”
 

“Well, you guys know that I haven’t been on a date for a while. So I need you to tell me what it’s like out there.”

They both look at me, confused.
 

“What do you mean?” Paige asks. “It hasn’t been
that
long for you.”

“Yeah, it’s not like you’re some 50-year-old who just got divorced and hasn’t dated in 30 years,” Kayla says. “I don’t get what you’re asking here.”

“I guess what I mean is, what do guys expect on a date?”

Kayla laughs. “Sex. Isn’t that what they always expect? I don’t think that’s changed since the caveman days.”

“Paige, what do you think?”

“I don’t really know. I’ve been with Michael forever.” She sips her wine.

“Yeah, but you have single girlfriends. What do they tell you?”

She looks at Kayla, then back at me. “Well, you go out to dinner. See if you like each other. Maybe catch a movie. And go from there.”

“By that, she means you decide if you want to have sex with him or stop seeing him.” Kayla puts her feet up on the coffee table.
 

“You decide this after a few dates?”

“Usually three or four, sometimes five,” Paige says.
 

“But three is the standard,” Kayla says.
 

“Three? Are you serious? It’s standard to have sex on the third date? That’s so soon! I thought that was just something people did in movies.”

Kayla grabs a cracker from the tray. “Are you joking with us here or what? I feel like I’m having a conversation with a twelve-year-old.”

I’m on my second glass of wine and I take a big gulp, then set the glass down on the table.

“Okay, here’s the deal. I’m ready to date but I’m kind of lacking in experience.” I wait for their response but they say nothing, so I continue. “What I mean is that I haven’t done the things you’re claiming men expect on a date.”

“Wait a minute.” Kayla sets her wine glass down. “Are you saying you’re a virgin?”

“Yes.” I sit up straighter, the wine boosting my confidence. “I’m a 23-year-old virgin.”

“Hold on.” Kayla puts her hand up like she’s stopping traffic. “How is that possible? I mean, I know you haven’t dated much but—”

“Don’t listen to her,” Paige says. “I think it’s sweet. And romantic. You’re saving yourself for marriage. A lot of people do that. Good for you, Morgan.” She raises her glass as if we should toast to my virginity.

I ignore her raised glass. “No, I’m not saving myself for anything. In fact, I really just want to get the whole sex thing over with, especially now that I know men are expecting it by the third date.”
 

“That’s not true for all men,” Paige assures me.

“It’s all men.” Kayla pours herself another glass of wine. “So how could this not happen in college?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t go to many parties and I didn’t live in the dorms. I lived at home with my dad, so it just didn’t happen. Plus, I never made it past the first couple dates with a guy. I wasn’t interested enough in any of them to . . . you know.”

“If you can’t even say the word, you’re not going to be able to do it.” Kayla jumps up and starts pacing the floor. “Okay, we can fix this. I can find you a guy who would be more than happy to take care of this for you.”

“She’s not getting her car fixed here.” Paige shoots a dirty look at Kayla, then turns back to me. “You need to find someone who cares about you. Someone who will make this memorable for you.”

“I don’t know if I want it to be memorable. I think I might just want to forget it after it happens and move on.”

“Yes, that’s exactly what you should do,” Kayla says. “My first time was prom night junior year with this guy I was dating. I made it into this huge deal and then it was over in like a minute. And he dumped me the next week. So trust me, the first time sucks. You just want to get it over with.”

“You should really think about this some more.” Paige uses her mom-tone, soft-spoken and concerned. “You’ve waited this long. What’s the rush?”

“I’m not in a rush. And I’m not saying I need to race out and have sex. I just need to start dating. But if this third-date rule is a real thing, or even if it’s four or five dates, then I don’t know what to do. I’m completely inexperienced.”

Kayla takes some cheese from the tray and plops down on the couch. “Just have sex and get it over with. I’ve already got someone in mind for you. I’ll see if he’s free Friday night.”

“Friday night? As in
this
Friday night? That’s so soon. I don’t think I can do that.”

Kayla gets up, grabbing her purse. “You can do it. I’ve gotta go.”

“Morgan, don’t listen to her. You’re not going to have sex with a guy just to get it over with. And you’re not doing it with some random guy.”

“Paige is right, Kayla. That’s just not me. I at least need to know the guy.”

“That’s why you’ll go to dinner first.” Kayla’s at the door, but she turns back and says, “Show me your underwear drawer.”

“What? Why?”
 

She races to my bedroom. I run to catch up with her, Paige following behind.

Kayla opens my top drawer and pulls out one of my bras. She holds it up. “What is this? Polyester? Beige? It doesn’t even have wires in the cups. No wonder you always look so saggy. Where do you even buy something like this?”

“They come in a two-pack,” I mumble. “You can get them anywhere.”

Paige stares at my beige bra, dangling in the air. “Um, maybe you could get one or two new ones. I could go shopping with you if you want.”

I snatch my bra from Kayla. “But these are really comfortable. And I don’t need that much support. I’m not exactly large-chested.”

Kayla takes it back and checks the size. “34C? That’s not small. You need new bras. Just throw this one out.” She tosses it on the floor and reaches in my drawer again. “Paige, look at this. It gets worse.” Kayla holds up a pair of my underwear. Pink cotton high-cut briefs.

“What’s wrong with those?” I try to grab them but she holds them high in the air. “They’re cut high up on the hip. They’re sexy.”

“You tell her,” Kayla says to Paige. “You’re better at saying things nicely.”
 

Paige looks at the underwear, then back at me. “Well, I kind of wore ones like that back in middle school. Not that you can’t wear them. I mean, you could work out in them, I guess. But maybe it wouldn’t hurt if you got something a little more, um, appealing to the opposite sex. Maybe something that doesn’t come in a pack of six.”

“What do
you
wear?” I ask her. “You’re married. You shouldn’t care what your underwear looks like.”