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Authors: Roberta Grieve

BOOK: Threads of Silk
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Now, she noted with satisfaction how he refused to meet her eye. ‘I only got cross cause I was worried, Angel,’ he said, in that whining tone she hated. ‘And Mum likes to know where you are as well.’

‘Where is she?’ Ellie had expected her mother home ages ago.

‘She’s doing an extra shift at the hospital – so you’ll have to get the tea ready tonight,’ Bert said.

Ellie gave an inward shiver. She’d be alone in the flat with him – the first time for weeks. But he hadn’t been drinking. Surely she’d be safe for a while. ‘What time will she be home?’ she asked.

‘About ten.’

‘Will you be going out?’ Ellie tried to disguise the eagerness in her voice and her sigh of relief when he nodded.

She put the vegetables in the cupboard under the sink and piled the fruit into a china bowl which she placed in the middle of the table. Then she prepared beans on toast and made a pot of strong tea – making sure that everything was exactly as her father liked it. He was quite capable of throwing something at her if the meal wasn’t to his satisfaction. She had learned to cope with his outbursts – when she was younger she’d even told herself she deserved it. What she found harder to deal with were his maudlin expressions of remorse afterwards, which inevitably led to the fondling she hated. How could she have believed that the things he did were expressions of love?

Bert finished his meal and pushed his plate away. He picked up his mug and took a long slurp of tea, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. As he stood up, Ellie took the plates over to the sink. She ran cold water on them, then turned to lift the kettle of hot water from the back of the range.

As she did so, her father shrugged himself into his jacket and took his cap from the peg on the back of the door. Ellie sighed with relief. He really was going out. With a bit of luck Mum would be home before he returned.

Her relief was short-lived. He came over to her and put his hands on her shoulders. ‘I wish we didn’t have ter fight, love.’ He ran his hand down her arm and grabbed her hand, pulling it towards him. ‘You seem to be avoiding me, lately. I’ve missed yer, Angel.’ Ellie stood her ground, looking him steadfastly in the eye. His hand dropped to his side. ‘What ’appened to that sweet little girl who always tried to please ’er daddy?’ he whined.

‘She grew up,’ Ellie snapped.

His eyes hardened and she steeled herself for a blow. But he moved away from her and a spasm of hatred crossed his face. ‘Yeah. Grown up into a right little tease. I bet it’d be a different story if it was golden boy touchin’ yer up. I’ve seen the way yer look at ’im, big cows’ eyes.’

She felt her face growing hot. She couldn’t deny it. Such thoughts had crossed her mind. But, since the news of his marriage, she’d tried hard to suppress them. She turned away, trying to hide her confusion and
self-disgust
. She shouldn’t be admitting it, even to herself.

Bert gave a short laugh. ‘So that’s the way the wind blows, is it? Well, ’e won’t be showin’ ’is face round ’ere any more. He’s decided to stay on in the army. Besides, I won’t ’ave him here, now he’s got some tart up the duff.’ His hand shot out and sent the dish of fruit crashing to the floor. ‘I’ve got to go out now. I’ll deal with you later,’ he said as he left the room.

Ellie’s hand shook as she returned the kettle to the range. She stood quite still, her shoulders hunched until the slam of the street door told her he’d gone. She wouldn’t cry, she told herself. It was a good thing Harry wasn’t coming home. She’d been dreading facing him and his new wife.

CHAPTER SIX
 
 

Ellie pulled the blankets over her ears to stifle her sobs. She’d tried telling herself it was for the best, that at least she wouldn’t have to face Harry’s new wife just yet. But it was no good.

Loud voices penetrated the fog of misery that had engulfed her and she sat up as her father shouted up the stairs. ‘Ellie, get down ’ere now.’

The doorknob rattled and she was glad she’d wedged the chair under it. But when her mother called softly, begging her to answer, she swung her legs to the floor.

‘Your dad wants to talk to you. Come down, love. He’s in a right paddy,’ Mary whispered as Ellie opened the door a crack.

Downstairs, Bert paced the kitchen, his face livid. ‘You can get down the market early tomorrer and tell Sid Varney you won’t be helping ’im out no more.’

Ellie started to protest.

‘No arguments, girl. You’re not working for him for coppers. I told you, it’s all arranged. You’ll be earning real money.’

‘But, Dad. I can’t let Mr Varney down.’

‘You’ve got a proper job now. And don’t you worry about Sid. I’ll sort him out.’ A spasm of hatred flashed across his face. ‘It’s time he saw I can look after my own family – don’t need ’im interfering.’

Ellie looked to her mother for support but Mary gripped the edge of the sink, avoiding her eyes. Hating to see her mother upset, she nodded. ‘All right, Dad.’

Bert grinned, his mood changing, as it usually did once he’d got his own way. ‘That’s my angel. You don’t want to waste that education on a market stall, do you?’

Back in bed, Ellie wished she’d had the courage to say that, education or not, she’d rather work for Sid Varney than Tommy Green. She remembered Sheila’s tales of what went on behind the scenes. The waitresses and hostesses were employed more for their pretty faces and shapely figures than for their brains.

Her sister hadn’t minded and she seemed happy enough with the way things had turned out – living with the boss in a big posh house and soon to have a baby. Being a kept woman didn’t seem to bother her, but it wasn’t the sort of life Ellie wanted.

She tried to console herself with the thought that the place up West was different – her mother seemed to believe Dad’s assurance that Tommy Green wanted to become respectable.

Ellie couldn’t sleep, wondering why her father hated Sid Varney so much. She knew they’d been friends as children and had been in the army together during the war. Perhaps it was because Sid had his own business, albeit only a market stall, while Bert had been unable to find regular employment until Tommy Green had taken him on.

 

Next morning, Ellie went down to find her mother sitting by the fire, cradling a cup of tea in her hands.

‘You’re going to be late for work,’ Ellie said, helping herself from the pot.

‘They’ve put me back on nights, now that the nurse I was covering for is back on duty,’ Mary said. ‘It was only temporary and, besides, I prefer night duty – it’s not so hectic. And if I’m off in the daytime I can pop round to your gran’s – make sure she’s all right.’

Ellie bit her lip. She couldn’t tell her mother that the thought of being left alone in the house at night terrified her.

Mary stared into the glowing bars of the kitchen range, apparently lost in thought. She looked up suddenly. ‘I’m sorry about you having to take that job,’ she said.

Ellie refilled their cups, putting the pot down slowly as she turned to her mother. Maybe it was a good moment to mention the scholarship. But her mother went on, ‘You know once your dad makes his mind up, you can’t budge him. If you defy him, he’ll make your life a misery.’

As if it isn’t already, Ellie thought, hearing the defeat in her mother’s voice. ‘I know, Mum,’ she said with a catch in her voice. ‘It’s all right. I won’t make a fuss.’

‘Good girl.’ Mary sighed and ran her fingers through her uncombed hair. ‘I must get washed and dressed. I can’t sit around all day.’

‘You stay there for a bit, Mum. I’ll do you some toast, then I’ll go down the market and see Mr Varney, tell him I haven’t got time to help out. Don’t worry, I won’t tell him what Dad said. I can get the shopping while I’m out, then I’ll clean up. You need a rest if you’re going to be working tonight.’

Mary relaxed gratefully into her chair and Ellie bustled round the kitchen, anxious now to get out of the house before her father got up.

When she reached the market Sid was busy with the early morning rush. He interrupted his banter with a customer and grinned. ‘Thanks for coming, love,’ he said. There was no chance to explain so she shrugged and turned to one of the women, who was testing the tomatoes for firmness.

Half an hour later the crowd had thinned out and Sid sighed and mopped his forehead. ‘Goin’ ter be a hot one today, Ellie. Better go and get us a cuppa before the rush starts again,’ he said, giving her a handful of coppers.

She couldn’t bring herself to say that she couldn’t stay. If Dad saw her, it was too bad. She’d claim she was shopping for Mum.

She hurried over to Bob’s Café on the corner and came back, carefully balancing a large mug of strong tea and a bottle of Vimto with a straw poking out of it. The bottle had been in the fridge and, as Ellie walked along, she licked at the cold droplets which had formed on the side of the bottle. She glanced round at the busy market, breathing in the familiar smells, enjoying the hot sun on her bare arms. If only she could work for Sid all the time, she wouldn’t mind having to leave school.

When she got back to Sid’s stall he was sitting on an upturned orange box. He reached out for the tea gratefully. ‘Park yer bum, love,’ he said. ‘Make the most of it while we’re quiet.’

Ellie pulled up another box and, without giving herself time to think, told Sid that, after today, she wouldn’t be able to help out any more. ‘As I told you, I start work soon. My dad’s already got me job you see, Mr Varney,’ she apologized.

‘Well, I’m sorry too, love.’ Sid sighed and Ellie thought he really did look disappointed. She hated upsetting him. He’d always been nice to her and she knew Harry thought a lot of him too.

Sid turned to serve a customer before she could reply. When he sat down again he was quiet for a while, drinking his tea. Suddenly he turned to her. ‘Thank God he’s not making you work at that club.’ He gave a short laugh. ‘Don’t mind me – I know your mother wouldn’t hear of it.’

‘She let Sheila,’ Ellie said.

‘Well – yes – and we all know what ’appened to ’er.’

A steady trickle of customers prevented any further conversation for a while but when they had time to talk again, Sid turned to Ellie and ran his fingers through the sparse remains of his hair. He gave an embarrassed cough, then blurted out, ‘Sorry, love. Shouldn’t have said that about your sister.’

‘It’s all right, Mr Varney. Everyone knows – that’s why Mum was so upset.’

‘At least they’re talking now though.’

Ellie nodded and told him that Sheila was expecting a baby.

Sid smiled. ‘I heard. A grandchild is a great peacemaker, you know.’

Ellie smiled back. Mr Varney was such a kind man and he wasn’t like the other grown-ups. He talked to her like she was an adult too. Maybe he would explain something that had been puzzling her.

‘I will be working for Mr Green,’ she confessed. ‘But he’s opening a new place – very posh – up West. He wants me to be his receptionist.’

‘You sure that’s all it is?’

‘Well, Mum seems to believe it. Everyone says Mr Green wants to go straight.’

Sid gave a snort of disbelief, then sighed. ‘Could be true. Perhaps that’s why he wants you – educated, nicely spoken. What could look more legit than having a girl like you as receptionist?’

Ellie felt herself blushing. ‘I don’t really want to but Dad says I must.’ She finished her lemonade and turned to Sid. ‘Why is he so keen to keep in with Mr Green? They fell out when there was all that trouble over Sheila. Now they seem to be mates again.’

‘Well, I did hear that Tommy ’ad some sort of hold over your dad. I ’eard that Bert ’ad done something a bit silly and Tommy got to hear of it. He needed a man for a dodgy caper and roped Bert in – in exchange for keeping shtum about the other job.’

Ellie nodded slowly. She was sure now that the ‘dodgy caper’ Sid referred to had something to do with those boxes she’d seen stacked in Solly’s yard. It still didn’t explain Tommy offering her a job though.

‘You know your dad,’ Sid said with a laugh. ‘’E likes to think he’s well in with the big boys. ’E probably asked Tommy to take you on and now that they’re mates again he was glad to oblige.’

Ellie was anxious to change the subject. ‘Did you know Harry was staying on in the army?’ she asked.

‘It’s a good career. I’d like him to work for me but don’t think I could pay him enough to support a wife and child.’ Sid didn’t seem to notice the shadow that passed over Ellie’s face and went on, ‘Your Harry’s ambitious. He wrote me that he’s training to be a vehicle mechanic. If he’s still set on it when he gets home, I might be able to get him a job with an old mate of mine out Essex way.’ Sid threw the dregs of his tea on the ground and stood up. ‘Can’t sit around nattering – gonna get busy again in a minute.’

Ellie took his mug and the bottle. ‘I’ll take these back to Bob’s, then I’ve got to go down the shops for Mum.’

‘You run along, gal. Don’t want you getting into trouble with Mum – or Dad,’ Sid told her. He slipped a few coins into her hand. ‘Thanks a lot – you’ve been a big help.’

‘I’ll try and come again – if I have time. Don’t know what hours I’ll be working yet,’ Ellie said.

As she left the noise of the market behind, she felt a lot happier. Her talk with Mr Varney had cleared her mind. He hadn’t seemed too worried when she told him about the club. Like Mum, he seemed to think the new Paradise Club would be more respectable than the Riverside. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all. She wasn’t quite so happy about the other thing Sid had told her. She’d always pictured Harry coming back to Bethnal Green when he left the army. She didn’t like the idea of him going to work in Essex. But perhaps it was just as well, she thought. She wouldn’t have to face seeing him – and his wife – every day.

 

Sid watched her go, smiling. Not for the first time he thought that if things had been different he could have had a daughter like Ellie. But he’d never married. Despite his big laugh, the cheery backchat, Sid was a shy man, hiding his real feelings behind his seemingly extrovert manner.

He’d only ever cared for one woman. But his lack of confidence had held him back and he’d let her slip through his fingers – not once, but twice. Mary Bowman, as he still thought of her, had been one of the most popular girls in their little gang – vivacious, sparkling, small and quick with laughing brown eyes. He’d understood when she’d fallen for Jim Scott – all the girls were after him or his twin brother Frank. Why would she look at him, fat, balding even in his early twenties and with no prospects beyond taking over the stall from his father?

When she got married he’d been pleased for her – and his mate. Jim was a good sort and Sid knew he’d make Mary happy. Once he’d become resigned to the fact that she’d never look on him as anything more than a friend, he just got on with his life. But he still lived for the sight of her, the warmth of her smile when she and her friend Anne shopped in the market – which they did nearly every day.

The pain faded after a while and he was able to take pleasure in seeing her happiness when Sheila was born and in being an unofficial uncle to the little girl and her cousin Harry. Despite everything, those years before the war had been good years.

As Sid watched Ellie threading her way between the market stalls, stopping to wave or call out a greeting, he thought how like her mother she was – bright, ambitious, full of life. His smile faded as he pictured Mary now – thin and careworn. And he could see Ellie ending up the same way. It worried him when he saw the purple shadows under her eyes, the droop of her shoulders. But, like her mother, she could always manage a smile for him.

Sid snapped out of his reverie as a sharp voice said, ‘Well, are you gonna serve me or not, Sid Varney? I ain’t got all day you know.’ It was Vi Thomas, Ellie’s great-aunt.

‘Sorry, Vi – got a lot on me mind,’ he said, weighing out carrots and picking an especially hearty cauliflower for her to make up for his lack of attention.

She handed over the money, tightening her lips as he passed her the change. ‘Mooning over some woman I expect,’ she said. ‘Time you got married, Sid Varney – if you can find anyone who’ll ’ave yer.’ She gave her cackling laugh.

Sid replied with a weak smile, his usual repartee deserting him for the moment.

It had started to rain and the market was almost deserted. He might as well pack up and go home. But the thought of the dismal two rooms above the newsagent’s where he lived alone had no attraction for him.

His thoughts turned to Mary again. He was sure she had no idea how he felt about her. In a way he hoped she never would. After all, she was a married woman and there was nothing he could do about it. And if Bert ever got so much as an inkling there’d be hell to pay.

Not that Sid was frightened of that weedy little toerag. But Bert had a powerful friend in Tommy Green. He wasn’t afraid for himself, though he’d heard tales of beatings down dark alleys when someone had upset Tommy or any of his mates. Sid’s concern was for Mary and Ellie. And now, with young Harry gone, they were even more vulnerable.

Not for the first time Sid wondered why on earth Mary had married Bert Tyler. After all, Jim had only been dead a few months when she took up with him. But she’d been struggling to bring up two children, having taken on responsibility for Harry when Anne was killed. And Bert could be charming when he put himself out – until he got what he wanted, that was. He’d always been jealous of the Scott brothers’ popularity and Sid suspected he’d seen a way of getting back at them.

And Mary, soft-hearted as ever, had admitted to Sid that she felt sorry for Bert, wounded at Dunkirk and knowing he would walk with a limp for the rest of his life. What Sid had never told her was that Bert’s wound was not the result of enemy action. His leg had been crushed between boat and breakwater as he’d fought for a place on one of the little ships. Sid, supporting the wounded Frank Scott, had been pushed aside as Bert forced his way to the front of the queue.

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