Through to You (16 page)

When I pull into the student parking lot, all I can think about is finding Harper, and I wonder if maybe I should send her a text to find out where she is.

But then I spot her, over on the lawn, sitting with a couple of her friends.

She's wearing this adorable little yellow summer dress. I've never seen her in a dress before. As she leans over, the bottom of the fabric rises up, giving me a view of her legs. Jesus Christ. What was I thinking, just kissing her last night? I walk over, not sure exactly how this is going to go.

One of the friends she's with is Anna. But the boy, I don't think I know him. Nick or something?

As I get closer, Harper looks up and smiles.

And in that moment I know it's going to be okay.

“Hey,” she says, standing up and walking toward me. She takes my hand. “Come and meet my friends.”

Anna and the boy look up from where they're sitting in the grass. Their heads are bowed down, and it looks like maybe they're looking at sheet music.

“This is Nico,” Harper says.

“Hey,” Nico says. He gives me the head nod that guys give each other.

“Hey.”

“And you know Anna,” Harper says. She points at Anna, who looks up at me and narrows her eyes suspiciously.

I'm used to the friends of girls I've hooked up with not liking me. What I'm not used to is caring.

“Hey, Anna,” I say, giving her a friendly smile. “Nice to see you again.”

She purses her lips. “Hello, Penn,” she says. “You're looking very relaxed for someone who's the talk of the school.”

“I'm the talk of the school?” I ask. “Why?” Is it possible that everyone already knows about me and Harper? Just from one night out at the Sailing Burrito?

“Well, when you throw a glass at a wall in front of everyone, people think it's kind of a big deal,” Anna says, all snotty like.

“Oh,” I say. “That.”

“Yeah,” Anna says. “That.”

“Anna,” Harper says warningly. She turns to me. “It's not a big deal, Penn. You know people. They just like to talk about stuff.”

“Yeah, stuff that's crazy,” Anna says. “Stuff that insane people do.”

I swallow. “I got angry,” I say, shrugging. “It happens.” Now I'm starting to get a little annoyed. Why should I have to explain myself to this girl? She doesn't even know me.

“Not to me,” Anna says. “If I got angry, there's no way I would throw a glass across the room.” She leans back on her hands, locking her elbows behind her. “People are saying that you were this close to throwing it at Jackson.”

“That's ridiculous,” I say, rolling my eyes. “I wasn't going to throw it at Jackson.”

“That's good,” Anna says. “Because if you were, that would indicate you have a serious anger problem.”

“Relax, Anna,” Nico says. “You don't understand, because you're not a guy.”

Anna looks shocked by this, like Nico has just declared that a woman can't be president or something. “What's that supposed to mean?”

“It just means that girls are different. You all talk behind each other's backs and gossip about each other. Sometimes men just need to get it out. The old-fashioned way.”

“By punching each other?” Anna says incredulously.

Nico shrugs. “If that's what it comes to.”

Anna's mouth drops. “I cannot believe you're taking his side.”

“I'm not taking anyone's side,” Nico says. “I'm just stating facts.”

Anna's face is turning red, and I'm wondering why she's getting so worked up. I mean, I get that she and Harper are like OMG BFF or whatever it is the girls are calling it these days, but come on. Can she really be that upset with me? She hasn't even given me a chance.

But then I catch her looking at Nico, and I get it. She has
a thing for him. She has a thing for Nico, and so yeah, she's annoyed with me because she thinks I'm not good enough for Harper, but now she's getting doubly annoyed with me because she thinks that Nico is siding with me instead of her.

Jesus, this is getting into, like, soap opera shit.

“You never take my side,” Anna says. She starts to pack up the sheet music that's sitting in front of her, shoving it into a folder angrily.

“What are you talking about?” Nico asks. He sounds perplexed in the way that guys do after girls say something that makes no sense whatsoever. “I always take your side.”

“Not today!” she fumes. “Where is my music for
Wicked
?” she demands. “I just had it!”

“I saw
Wicked
in New York a couple of years ago,” I offer. “I took my mom for her birthday.” I don't mention that it was a family trip, and that my dad left at intermission to go to the bathroom and then didn't come back until after the show, completely shitfaced, and then he and Braden got into a fight, and so Braden and I ended up wandering around Times Square at night like a couple of vagrants because we had no money and couldn't stand to be around my parents. That was before Braden discovered the wonderful allures of marijuana.

“You went to
Wicked
?” Anna asks. “That figures.”

I frown. “Why does that figure?”
Wicked
is very girly. It would make no sense for me to be at that show. I should have been at something a little more manly, like a comedy show, or maybe that Spiderman show everyone was so worked up about
because the actors kept getting hurt. That I went to
Wicked
shows that I'm actually very in touch with my soft side.

“Because
Wicked
is the show people go to when they want to make themselves feel all cultured. But in reality they have no idea that
Wicked
is overproduced fluff.”

I shrug. “My mom picked it.” If Anna doesn't like
Wicked
, why does she have the music for it?

“Yeah, well, people like your mom have no taste.”

“Anna!” Harper exclaims.

But I don't really care that Anna said that. She's right. My mom doesn't have that much taste.

“No, it's okay,” I say. “But why do you have music from
Wicked
if you hate it so much?”

Anna sighs. “You wouldn't get it.”

“Anna's trying to get into Juilliard,” Harper explains. “And she needs to do an audition piece.”

“And one of the songs from
Wicked
has been assigned to me,” Anna says. “So I have to learn it.”

“Oh,” I say. “That sounds fun.”

“It's not
fun
,” she says. “It's extremely stressful and overwhelming.”

I nod. It doesn't make any sense, but I'm not even mad that she's being a bitch to me. It's like I'm excited for the challenge of winning her over. She doesn't know me, so it's not like she can really hate me
that
much. I'll just have to show her the real me.

But obviously connecting with her over this whole Juilliard thing is a bad idea. Not only is the world of music
foreign to me, but I just can't relate to the college admissions process. Once I got hurt, I completely forgot about college. I've hardly even thought about it. It's probably something I
should
think about—I mean, what am I going to do after graduation? Get a job? I guess I'm going to have to.

Suddenly I'm depressed. What's the point of even graduating? I'm probably going to end up at some shitty job making shitty money. Harper's going to Ballard. It's in Rhode Island, just far enough away for her to meet some other guy.

I force myself to focus back on the conversation. But no one's saying anything. We're all just sort of standing there with tension in the air.

There's tension between me and Anna, tension between Anna and Nico. There's even a little bit of tension between me and Harper.

And that's when the school nurse decides to descend on our little group.

I'm very familiar with the school nurse, because back in the day I'd fake a lot of illnesses. I'd go down to the nurse's office clutching my stomach and pretending I'd just thrown up in the bathroom. They have to let you go home if you've thrown up. It's, like, a rule or something. And since no one could prove I hadn't, they'd have to let me go.

It wasn't even that big a deal. The nurse didn't really care that I was lying. She's actually kind of cool, in an old, doddering-woman kind of way.

“Penn!” she exclaims when she sees me. “I haven't seen you
in a while!” She sounds like I'm an old friend she's missed, and not just a delinquent student who misused her trust to get out of going to class.

“Yeah, well,” I say, shrugging. “I've gotten my stomach issues worked out.”

“Yeah, I'll bet.” She purses her lips and looks at me knowingly. “Anyway, I'm looking for a student, and I'm hoping you can help.” She waves a list of names in front of me. “These students are trying to get out of getting their physicals, so I'm trying to track them down.”

Next to me I feel Harper stiffen.

The nurse glances down at the paper. “Do any of you know Harper Fairbanks?”

Nico averts his gaze and stares down at the paper in front of him. Anna lets out this big sigh, like she can't believe the jig is up.

And then, before I even know what's happening, I say to the nurse with a straight face, “No. I don't know Harper Fairbanks.” I add in a little shrug for good measure.

“It's the strangest thing,” the nurse says, shaking her head. “I swear, I cannot find this girl. I've tried everything, and I just cannot find her.” The nurse seems flummoxed, which is a nod to Harper's stealth avoidance skills, obviously.

“I think she moved away,” Anna says. “Didn't she move away, Nico?”

Nico frowns. “Harper Fairbanks? Yeah, I think she might have moved away. She used to be in my science class, but then I
think she moved to Florida. She had allergies or something, so her parents moved her right out.” He makes a miming motion, like her parents physically picked her up and set her down in Florida.

“Yup,” I agree. “Right out.”

“Because of allergies?” The nurse seems shocked. “I didn't know allergies in New England could get that bad.”

“Well, it wasn't
air
allergies,” I say at the same time that Anna says, “Well, she had a condition.”

“It was, um, food allergies,” I say. “A condition of food allergies. Like, really bad ones.”

“But why did she have to go to Florida?” the nurse persists. What is she, some kind of crime-scene investigator or something?

“Um, well, she was getting all these hives,” I say.

“From clams,” Nico says.

“Yes!” Anna's all over it. “Clams! And since there's so much clam chowder in New England, she just had to go.”

“It was very serious,” I say. “She might have died if she even got in contact with a clam. Or anything that, you know, lived in a shell.”

“Yeah,” Harper says, apparently feeling confident enough to start chiming in on her own imaginary fate. “It's like those kids who can't be around peanuts.”

“Huh,” the nurse says. “I've never heard of anything like that. Well, thanks anyway.” She shakes her head and walks away, mumbling about food additives.

Once she's out of earshot, the four of us look at each other and then immediately start laughing.

“Oh my God,” Harper says. “That was epic.”

“I seriously thought you were busted.” Nico shakes his head. “Food allergies? Jesus, I can't believe she bought that.”

“Good one, Penn,” Anna says. She gives me a grudging smile.

“Thanks,” I say.

Harper beams at me.

I reach out and take her hand. Her fingers wrap around mine, and I've never felt anything better.

Okay, so that was pretty awesome. Not only did Penn completely and totally win Anna over, but he was somehow able to save me from the school nurse. (And seriously, when did the school nurse become such a stalker? I mean, I understand she's just doing her job, but really? Coming outside and asking people if they know me? That's kind of taking things to a whole other level. That's, like, restraining-order territory.)

Once Anna and Nico head to first period, Penn leans me up against the side of the school and kisses me. It makes my heart pound just as fast as it did last night. Everything about him is exciting. Last night it was exciting because he was finally letting me in. This morning it's exciting because he's kissing me right here at school, out in the open where anyone can see.

“I missed you,” he breathes into my hair.

“I missed you, too,” I say back.

* * *

But it turns out I don't have to miss him.

Because we're together after that, every moment pretty much, for the next three weeks. At school we meet between classes and do our homework together at lunch, stealing kisses in between math problems. After school Penn will drop me off at the dance studio, then head to Whole Foods, where he buys snacks. Then he keeps me company in the office while we eat whatever delicious treats he's picked up that day. When I'm done with work, sometimes Penn goes home, but usually he'll come back to my house. We sit out by the fire pit and eat s'mores and then make out after my mom goes to sleep. Weekends are reserved for our real “dates”—we'll go to dinner, see a movie, or take long walks. One Saturday we go to the beach, staying there all day until our skin is sunburned and our shoes are filled with sand.

Everything is going great until Anna starts to freak out.

She shows up at my house on a Friday morning before school. Her hair is disheveled, her face is flushed, and her eyes are wide. She's holding a cup of Starbucks coffee in each hand.

“We need to talk,” she says.

“What's wrong?” I ask. “Is it your mom?” Anna's mom had breast cancer a few years ago. She's totally fine now, and in remission, but there's always a chance that the cancer could come back.