Till Abandon (11 page)

That wasn't an option.

He melted into the background, ears straining as Czion chanted in a foreign whisper. Words Blake couldn't understand, but they mesmerised him all the same. His eyes slid closed, head fell against the wall as Czion's voice floated around him. The hypnotic, soothing words calmed the wolf as well—the animal whimpered, then fell silent.

"She gave you her life-force."

Blake's eyes flew open and collided with Czion's dark gaze. Heart thumping in his chest, Blake asked, “What does that mean and how do we fix it?"

"It means I don't understand why she's not dead.” Confusion shone in Czion's eyes. “Her life-force, Blake. The thing keeping her alive. She gave it to you, and here she is."

Blake grimaced, sharp pains stabbing him in the heart. “I'm aware of what she did. What do we do to help her now?"

Czion's lips curved. “Give it back to her."

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"How?"

Blake would do whatever he had to do to bring Voltaire back.

Czion moved to a sitting position, Voltaire's left hand still clasped in his. “I have to show you how to channel your life force into her—it'll act as a jump-start for her.” A dark cloud shadowed his eyes. “That means you'd essentially be sharing a life force for a while."

"Let's do it.” Blake pushed away from the wall and walked to the other side of the bed. He toed off his shoes, then climbed onto the bed beside Voltaire. “Tell me what to do."

Czion narrowed his eyes. “Did you hear me? I said you'd be sharing a life-force with Voltaire, almost like sharing a brain—a heart. Are you okay with that?"

A smile curved Blake's lips as he took hold of Voltaire's other hand, entwining their fingers. “I don't know about you, jaguar, but I will do anything for my mate. Anything to see her smile again, anything to hear her voice.” His voice wobbled. “Anything to keep her by my side. Besides, Voltaire's already all up in my head—this time I get to be in hers."

Sadness rolled off Czion as he stared at Blake and Voltaire's joined hands. “You really love her, don't you?"

"She's my mate, my other half. I can't do anything but love her."

Blake dropped his head onto the pillow and watched as regret chased agony across Czion's face. The jaguar had his own issues with love, it seemed. Before Blake could voice his thoughts, Czion blinked and the emotions melted away like they'd never been.

Interesting, but not of any concern to Blake at present. He cleared his throat and Czion laid back.

"Okay, take a deep breath,” the jaguar instructed.

Blake did as he said, letting out a slow, shuddering breath. A sudden pressure pushed into his head and he tensed.

Relax, it's me.
Czion spoke calmly inside his head.
You have to open for me, allow me access in order to show you what to do.

Blake gritted his teeth. Fucking jaguar—his enemy—was in his head.

"Why didn't you tell me this had to happen?"

Would you have still said yes?

Like there was any doubt about the lengths he'd go to for his woman.

"I would have had time to prepare for this shit."

Czion's forced chuckle vibrated in Blake's head.
You should be all prepared now—stop complaining.

Behind closed eyelids, Blake rolled his eyes. “Let's do this."

All right, reach for V's mind with yours. Don't be daunted by the...um...by the darkness. She's still there, still present.

Blake followed the trail Czion laid out for him, until he encountered overwhelming darkness.
Voltaire.
His heart broke a little more. She'd done this for him, given all of herself to him without thinking about her safety. He wanted to shake some sense into her. What the hell had she been thinking? Didn't she realise he'd die without her?

Pull yourself together, wolf,
Czion growled.
You're no good to any of us like this. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and let's get your woman back.

Fucking jaguar was right. Blake mentally shook himself—when he got his mate back, he'd be sure to show his displeasure. Right now, she was depending on him to save her.

He would.

I'm transferring some of your life-force to her. Kind of a way to coax her to come out from where she's hiding,
Czion said.

Blake braced himself for... Hell, he didn't know what. But nothing happened. Not a flicker from Voltaire. She wasn't responding to Czion's ministrations. Frustration threatened to overwhelm him, but Blake dashed it away. No giving up.

Talk to her. Let her hear your voice.

Blake cleared his throat.

With your mind, wolf. Use your link.

Damn. He could finally mind-talk with his mate, but Blake didn't want it to be like this. Right now, though, it was about anything that would get her to respond. To come back to him.

Taking a mental breath, Blake spoke into the darkness of Voltaire's mind.
I'm waiting for you, Death Bringer.
Waiting for you to come back to me, to give me that forever you promised. You said you'd never lie to me and I'm holding you to that.

Emotion clogged his throat and he swallowed before continuing.
You came to me when I needed you so much, but—typical me—I tried to fight it. Tried to push you away. For all my needing of you, the feelings suddenly swamping me at your presence scared me. You were my mate, I knew it, felt it in my bones that this was for keeps. The instant I looked into your weird-ass eyes, I knew there'd be no me. Only us. Only Blake and Voltaire.

Tears slid out of the corners of his eyes and onto the pillow.
You frustrate me. You excite me. You challenge me and I love it. I love you—your touch, your voice. I need my mate back, because I can't live without you. Wherever you go, I go, and if you choose to let go—if you choose not to come back—I'm following you. I'm not living this life without you.

The fingers twisted around his fluttered. Blake gasped. A strange feeling of something—someone—sucking away his very life suddenly washed over him.

Yes,
Czion murmured in his head.
She's coming out of hiding.

Blake focused on the darkness that was Voltaire's mind. By slow degrees, the dark turned greyish, then lightened even more. His heart leapt. The wolf lifted its head and howled, causing a blinding ball of light to burst across the expanse of Voltaire's brain.

Love. He recognised it. His woman loved the sound of the wolf and she loved her mate. She loved him. The wolf howled again and the ball exploded like fireworks. Streaks of colour rained like confetti.

Pull back, pull back,
Czion cautioned.
Now that she's awake, she can make up what she lost—we don't want her to take too much from you.

Blake retraced the path Czion had laid for him, pulling out of Voltaire's head. He opened his eyes and turned towards his mate.

Gold and violet eyes stared back at him.

Voltaire opened her eyes to meet her mate's wet and strained features. Joy sparked in his green gaze, setting her pulse to racing. A wide smile softened his face.

"You're awake!"

He gathered her into his arms and she went willingly, squeezing him as tight as he held her.

"Never leave me again,” Blake whispered in her hair. “Never do that to me again."

"I'm sorry.” She bit her lip as her tears soaked the shoulder of his T-shirt.

Trapped in the darkness, she'd heard his words, heard him confess he'd follow her if she didn't wake up. Panic for him, for his pack, had made her fight like never before, clawing her way from the dark depths surrounding her until she found the light of Blake's love. She'd pushed past it all to come to him, to comfort him, to erase the pain she'd heard so clearly in his voice.

Her mate needed her and nothing would stop her from going to him.

I love you so much,
she whispered in his head.

And I love you,
Blake responded in the same way.

Then, “Holy shit! I'm still in your head.” Blake leaned away from her to peer down into her face. “Did you hear me? I was in your head."

"I heard you, shifter.” Voltaire wrapped her palms around either side of his face, then pulled his head down and fused their lips together. She sighed, Blake moaned, and the wolf howled.

A throat cleared on the other side of the bed. “Uh, that's because you each have a part of the other's life-force inside you."

Voltaire cocked open an eye and murmured against Blake's mouth, “Why is there a jaguar in our bed, shifter?"

Blake chuckled and broke the kiss. Placing a pillow behind her head, he dropped a kiss on her forehead. “The jaguar was the one who helped me bring you back, so now I owe him big time. Thanks a lot.” He pouted.

"I always collect, wolf.” Czion had got off the bed and stood on the far side of the bedroom, watching them with a strange expression on his face.

"I expect nothing less.” Blake brushed a lock of hair from Voltaire's forehead as she squinted up at him.

"I'm not getting this.” She looked form Blake to Czion and back. “You went to Czion—your pack's enemy—for help?"

Soft eyes roamed her face. Blake brushed her mouth with his thumb. “Don't you know by now I'd do anything for you? I called Remi with your phone—just hit redial—and she said Czion could help.” His jaw clenched. “I wasn't going to say no to that. Not if he could help bring you back to me."

"We can go back to waging war tomorrow, V.” Czion winked at her. “Today it's all about you."

Tears blinded Voltaire. Heart full, she blinked the sting away. “Thank you, Czion."

She captured Blake's hand and brought it to her lips as she stared into his eyes, telling him what she felt.

I know how you feel,
Blake said in her mind.
I see it in your mind, I feel it in the beat of your heart. And I feel the same.

"All right.” Czion walked to the door. “While you two make sickening eyes at each other, I'll let myself out."

"Hold up, jaguar.” Blake kissed Voltaire quickly and hopped off the bed. “I'll show you out."

Blake trudged down the stairs, Czion at his heels. At the newly repaired door, he turned, offering the jaguar his hand.

"Thank you for coming, for helping not only Voltaire, but me as well."

Mature enough to give credit where credit was due, Blake was now in Czion's debt.

The other grasped his hand in a firm shake. “I was only the facilitator.” A bitter-sweet smile didn't touch his eyes. “The way you two love each other, it's almost humbling."

Blake raised an eyebrow at the wistful note in Czion's voice. “Sounds like you may be feeling the same thing. Where is she?"

Czion dropped Blake's hand and glanced away. “She, who?"

"The woman you love—your mate.” A shadow crossed Czion's face and Blake frowned. “You do know who she is, right?"

A pained chuckle escaped Czion. “Oh, yeah. I know who she is."

"So what's the problem? Why are you suddenly looking like you lost your best friend?"

The jaguar jammed his hands into the pockets of his slacks and sighed. “Look—I don't—it's none of your business, wolf."

"Okay.” Blake raised his hands in surrender. “It's Remi, isn't it?"

The jaguar's gaze swung back to him, sharp and menacing. That had been a lucky guess, but oh, yeah, right on the money.

"Don't say her name, wolf."

A series of growls from Czion made the wolf sit up and take note, but Blake soothed it.

"It's okay for you to call my woman by a nickname, but I can't even say your woman's name?"

"She's not my woman.” Czion snarled. “She won't ever be my woman."

"Dude, you're denying your mate? Why the death wish?"

Czion shook his head, despair in his eyes before he masked it. “You don't get it, wolf. She's the freaking president of the PSC. That's like a commoner and royalty. Just don't mix.” He blew out a frustrated breath. “Why am I even talking to you, of all people, about this? Go see to your woman."

Turning, he walked out of the door and disappeared into the night.

"Unlucky bastard.” Blake whispered the words with a heavy shake of his head. He couldn't begin to imagine knowing who your mate was, working side by side in constant contact and not being able to touch them. Claim them.

That would be torture.

He raced upstairs, taking them two at a time, in a hurry to get back to his mate. He found her standing in the middle of the room, butt naked. Blake skidded to a halt.

"What are you doing?"

She swung around to face him with a grimace. “I need a bath, I feel dirty and grimy."

"Then I'll draw you a bath.” Walking up to her, he positioned her until she sat on the bed's edge. “Don't move."

A small smile ghosted her lips.
Ordering me around already, shifter?

Blake chuckled. “Whatever I have to do to keep you safe."

He hurried to the bathroom to get her bath ready. Making sure the water was warm enough and all the essentials were within reach, he went back into the bedroom and scooped her into his arms. Voltaire melted in his embrace, sighing with her eyes closed.

In the bathroom, he lowered her into the filled tub, cock hardening when she moaned and threw her head back.

"Fuck. I think on the strength of this alone I'm keeping you, shifter."

Eyelids fluttering, Voltaire sank into the water.

Blake dropped to his knees beside the tub and dipped his hand into the water.

Good, because I'm not leaving your side

He grabbed the large, sea-foam sponge and dipped it into the sudsy water, drizzling droplets down her neck and chest, watching as she arched her back and her dusky, rose-coloured nipples pebbled. He licked his lips, mouth watering.

Focus, Montez.

Grabbing the washrag and a bar of soap, he commanded Voltaire, “Sit up and lean forward."

She did, and he proceeded to soap her back, biting the inside of his cheek at her moans. Finished, he made her lean her head on the edge of the tub, and soaped his way down her front, fighting hard to ignore those twin globes begging for his mouth. This wasn't about his lust, it was about taking care of his woman.