Timeless Desire (39 page)

Panna spun around. Two guards held Jamie’s arms. The look of despair on his face broke her heart.

“What do you want?” she demanded.

“The captain, for one,” he said. “He’s a traitor, and I suspect you may be, too.”

“You’re pathetic. He outshines you in everything, and you can’t bear it.”

Adderly brought the back of his hand across her cheek, and Jamie howled, “You bastard!”

“You and I will be spending quite a bit of time together, Mrs. Carnegie. You will want to learn to watch your tongue.”

“I won’t tell you anything.”

“Oh, you will speak. You will
beg
to speak. Tell me, Captain, did your sweetheart tell you that she came to me drunk and offered me her wares?”

“Liar!”
Panna cried.

“She is a most accommodating lover. She sucked my cock like a courtesan. Would you care to watch her do it again?” He reached for his breek buttons.

Jamie ripped himself free of the guards and charged. Adderly lifted the pistol to shoot, but Panna threw herself at his arm, knocked the gun out of his grasp, and sent it flying into a corner.

One of the guards caught Jamie’s arm. Jamie swung his free fist into the man’s chin. The man fell backwards with a groan, and his eyes flickered closed.

The other guard drew his sword.

Panna ran toward the dropped pistol, but Adderly grabbed her arm. He had the same idea.

Jamie unsheathed Robert’s sword and met the guard’s swing with a ferocious clang.

Adderly had both Panna’s arms now and flung her out of his way. She managed to get a hold of his breeks and used her body as a deadweight to hinder him.

The guard thrust his sword, catching Jamie’s side. Panna’s heart jumped into her throat, but it was only his coat, and the sword became tangled long enough for Jamie to ram his blade into the man’s thigh. The guard fell to the ground with a choked scream.

Adderly broke free of Panna, and he and Jamie raced for the gun. Adderly reached it first, but Jamie managed to kick it under the pews. The corner made maneuvering hard, and Adderly managed to unsheathe his sword before Jamie could get his into position.

Jamie leapt backward, just missing Adderly’s thrust. In an instant, they were in a furious battle, the ringing of clashing blades filling the room. Adderly swung and hit the corner of the crypt, sending a sliver of marble flying.

“Panna, go!” Jamie cried.

But she wasn’t going to leave him. She ran toward the pews to find the gun, but Adderly held her off with a slash of his blade.

The guard with the wounded thigh reached for Panna’s ankle, pulling her to the floor. She kicked the man’s nose, and he yelped in pain but held his grip.

Jamie fought furiously, but Adderly forced him to back slowly toward the kneeler in front of the crypt.

“Jamie, behind you!”

It was too late. He fell backward, and in an instant Adderly had his sword point on Jamie’s throat.

“How good it will be to see the noose tied round your neck.”

“Let her go,” Jamie said hoarsely. “I will confess to whatever you want.”

Adderly laughed. “You will confess and she will watch.” He pressed the blade harder and a rivulet of blood ran down Jamie’s neck. “Do you know where my men are heading in an hour? What is the name of the town where your little urchin lives? St. Cadoc? By morning St. Cadoc will be burnt to the ground and every man, woman, and child dead. And the only witness will report it was the clans.”

Jamie spat and Adderly kicked him.

“My war will be on,” Adderly said, the fire of lunacy in his eyes, “the war I’ve longed to fight. And we won’t stop until the only Scots left will be the ones on their knees, begging for mercy.”

Panna struggled to free herself. She could see the pistol three pews away.

“My father will never allow it,” Jamie said. “You’re an embarrassment to your uniform.”

Adderly’s face turned beet red. “You know, I thought I wanted to see you hang, but I think I prefer to kill you myself.” He gripped the sword hilt with both hands and lifted the sword.

“Stop it!” the earl roared as he burst through the door. “That’s your brother!”

Panna froze, as did Adderly—just long enough for Jamie to roll free.

“He’s your brother!” the earl cried. “My flesh and blood! Sorcha was mother to you both!”

Aghast, Jamie looked at Adderly. Adderly chewed his lip furiously, then swung the sword with all his might.

Jamie flung himself out of the way. Adderly’s swing hit the wall instead, sending the flaming torch rolling into the hall.

Jamie sprang to his feet and charged. Adderly ran down the aisle.

The earl caught Jamie’s arm and shoved him hard against the wall. Jamie’s sword crashed to the floor. “He’s your brother!” he screamed. “Stop it!”

“Why wouldn’t you admit it?” Jamie shouted back. He caught his father by the coat and shook him. “Why did I have to wait until now to hear the words?”

Jamie raised his arms to hammer his father with his fists, but the earl shoved him.

A thunderous explosion filled the room.

Panna turned in the direction of the noise. Adderly held the smoking pistol.

“Oh, Jamie. No.
No!
” she cried, kicking free of the guard.

But Jamie stood staring at his father, stunned.

“What have you done?” The earl gazed sorrowfully at Adderly. A small black hole had appeared in the middle of the earl’s chest.

“
No!
” Adderly cried, horrified. “
No!
I meant to shoot
him
!”

“Brothers . . .” the earl said softly, and crumpled.

The torch’s flames had engulfed the hallway rug now and were beginning to lick the walls.

“Get help!” Jamie shouted to Adderly.

Adderly looked at the pistol as if he didn’t recognize it as his own.

“Get
help
!”

Adderly dropped the pistol and ran.

Jamie pulled Panna to her feet. “Go through the passageway.”

“Not yet. Not without you.”

He grabbed the wounded guard and dragged him into the hallway.

Panna took the earl’s hand. He was breathing sporadically, his eyes wide and glassy. “I loved her.”

“I know. You built this chapel for her, didn’t you?”

“Aye. Adderly was born two years after Jamie.” He coughed and blood drained from his mouth. “My wife had already miscarried twice. She was told she would never be able to have any more children. I had to have an heir.”

“And you only took one of them?” Panna was horrified.

“Adderly was an infant. Sorcha was dying.”

Jamie returned, waving away the smoke. He grabbed the second guard and pulled him out.

“But why didn’t you take Jamie, too?” Panna asked.

“My wife would accept a bastard infant she could call her own. Not a two-year-old. We never told anyone.”

“Adderly’s not your heir. He was not born to your wife.”

“I love them both, but Adderly
is
my heir. I’ve claimed him as my own, and no one can change it.”

Jamie returned coughing. He knelt by his father. “Come.”

“Leave me. I’m dying.” He clasped Jamie’s forearm. “You’re a good man. I’m very proud. I wish . . . I wish things had been different.”

His eyes closed and his arm fell to his side.

Jamie clasped his father’s hand and squeezed. Then he pulled Panna toward the small door by the altar. “Is this the one?”

“Yes.”

He drew her into his arms and looked into her eyes. She knew what he was going to say.

“I cannot go.”

“I know.” She began to cry. “St. Cadoc.”

“I will come. I swear it. I swear on my mother’s honor I will come to you.”

“But how, Jamie? The chapel is burning.”

“If the door isn’t here, the passageway will be. It has to be. You must go.”

“Oh, Jamie. Your father was weak, but he loved you. He told me so. And he loved your mother. He was the one who built the chapel.”

Jamie’s eyes widened. “He said that?”

“Yes.”

Flames were pouring into the chapel now, streaming thick orange fingers up the ceiling.

“I have to go, Panna. I’m sorry.”

“Wait.” She grabbed his hand and pulled it into the void. Like hers, it disappeared into the darkness. “I had to be sure.”

He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Tears ran down her cheeks.

“I’ll be waiting, Jamie.”

“I will come.”

Andrew Carnegie Library, Carnegie, Pennsylvania Monday, July 30, 8:05 p.m.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” Marie had turned off every light but the one over the circulation desk and was watching Panna from the entry hall, tote bag in hand.

“Yes.” Panna gave her friend a smile. “You worry too much about me. I like that.”

Marie smiled back. “Well, when you didn’t show up yesterday . . .”

“I know, I know. I should have called. But, man, I felt lousy.”

Marie shifted. “It wasn’t Charlie, was it?”

Panna shook her head. “No. Believe it or not, this time it wasn’t Charlie. Charlie and I have come to a little understanding.”

“You have?”

“Yep. He thinks it’s time I moved on. I think so, too.”

“Oh, Panna, I’m glad.”

“Yeah.” she nodded. “Me, too.”

“So Steve?”

“Well, let’s give that a little time, shall we?” It shouldn’t take more than a few days for Jamie to arrive. Panna told herself that she was going to remain hopeful. Jamie had never failed to keep any promise he’d made to her.

“Are you staying long?” Marie asked. “I feel bad. This wasn’t even your day to work.”

“You know me: I can’t stay away.”

Marie hesitated. “And you’re sure you’re all right?”

“Positive.”

“All right. See you tomorrow.”

“Love you, Marie.”

Marie turned, surprised, and smiled. “I love you, too.”

Panna waited until Marie was gone, then laid her head on her arms and stared at the tiny fox sitting on her desk.

Andrew Carnegie Library, Carnegie, Pennsylvania Wednesday, August 15, 10:20 p.m.

Panna was glad Marie had stopped asking her why she was the first person in the library every morning and the last person to leave every evening.

Tonight she was wrestling with herself over how to let go. One would think she’d be an expert, having already let go of one husband. But somehow that didn’t make it any easier.

Jamie had been like a wonderful, exciting dream. But dreams end, and life goes on. Jamie had lived—or died—and she would never know what happened. There was nothing in Google or Wikipedia that gave her any clue—nothing in any of the books in this or any library that said anything more than that the Earl of Bridgewater had died in 1706 and the earldom had passed to his son, John Bridgewater. Nowhere was one word written about James Bridgewater.

Panna gazed at the statue, wondering if she’d been foolish to have once wanted to unlock its secrets.

She would believe that Jamie had tried to come to her but couldn’t. She would believe he would always love her. She would believe that in the end he would find happiness, just as he would want her to do.

She looked at the ring on her finger, the ring she would never take off. The emerald flashed in the overhead lights like the firepots on the ramparts of MacIver Castle.

With a gentle tug, she slipped the emerald off the fourth finger of her left hand and placed it on the fourth finger of her right. It sat on top of the plain gold band Charlie had given her.

A noise up front made her look up. The door swung open. Steve stood in the entryway with a bag in his hand.

“Hey,” she said, surprised

“I hope you don’t mind. I just got off my shift. Marie gave me the key.”

“Heck no. I was just finishing up.”

“I brought tacos from Mendoza’s. Pork and beef. They’re fantastic. I thought maybe you’d be hungry.” He shrugged his shoulders.

“God, they smell great. I’d love some. Thank you.”

He came around the circulation desk and took a seat beside her.