Authors: Jecca Bartlett
"That, that's what's wrong with it," said Gooch as she lifted Cyndi's hand from her blouse.
Cyndi cleared her throat, "Right, okay, point taken. So what's next?"
"Tinder, it's a dating app..."
"You mean hook-up app? The one that guy suggested the other night?"
"Right, that. It's a dating app, for-you know-dates, the hook-ups are up to you. Look," she took out her phone and slid open the app, "here's mine, it's all right here, and then you see guys who are local who match with you and you swipe left or right, like this, and that's how you pick."
"That's how you pick? But how do you pick, like really, how? I mean, what are you looking for?"
"Well, like here's one, he's got a girl on each arm, he doesn't need me, swipe left."
"But you didn't even read his bio."
"I don't care about his bio, I want a date not an orgy. At least not tonight," she said wiggling her eyebrows. "I'm serious, download the app, we're going to put you out there, have a little fun. Your business is established, you're doing fine, it's time to enjoy life a little bit."
"I don't know, I don't..."
"Yes, yes you do. Let's go, come on, want me to do it for you?"
"Remind me why I like you again?"
"Because I'm your better half. Let's get on this, are you downloading it?"
Cyndi held her phone to her chest, "Maybe."
"Give me that thing," Gooch grabbed the phone out of her hands, "okay, oh you did download it, sweet! Here we are, let's go."
Less than an hour later Cyndi had her first online profile, and she was already enjoying the scenery.
"This is fun! Hey look, that guy at the bar is on here!" she giggled.
Gooch sighed, "I'm not sure Tinder and apple-tinis mix very well. Don't do anything rash, like swipe after drinking," she said, gently moving Cyndi's drink just out of her reach.
"Oooh, look at him," Cyndi cooed.
Gooch leaned in to take a look, "He's holding up his black belt certification, swipe left, he shouldn't have to prove it."
"You're tough, what about this guy?"
"Leaning against the Porsche? No, look there's another one in the background here, he's at a dealership. Next. You know what? I don't think you should be licensed to do this on your own yet, but soon, very soon." Gooch laughed. Cyndi gently punched her in the shoulder and smiled at her.
Later, at home, in bed, Cyndi took her phone out again and opened the app. It was unexpectedly fun, and no one knew, the guys couldn't tell. The city was big and there were lots of men nearby to gaze at, she settled back against her pillow and decided she would just enjoy the show.
****
PEARCE
Pearce woke up early on Saturday. He stretched and glanced at the clock. He had time to go to the gym before he met his father and the acquisitions team at the office. Saturday morning meetings were a favorite of his father. An excellent way to show everyone that no sacrifice was too great. Leaving your kids and wife to fend for themselves on Saturday was a great way to show you were devoted to him, and not them.
He understood why his father did it, he just disagreed. He felt like they should be able to enjoy some free time, God knows they put in enough time at the office. If it were his company he'd do so many things differently. But it wasn't, and he didn't really want it to be. Maybe the difference was he wasn't a wolf, he didn't have the hunt/kill instinct like his dad did.
The only real limiter, he thought to himself as he headed to the gym downstairs, was his mom. At least the guy listened to her.
After his workout, Pearce showered and changed and still arrived at the office by 8.
"Dad," Pearce nodded, "good morning guys."
There were murmurs of acknowledgement.
"Pearce, glad you could make it."
"When haven't I?"
"You always have, it's just an expression."
Pearce sighed and took his seat, grabbing a coffee on his way. His father always made him feel like a recalcitrant child. Or maybe it was his own fault, maybe he just always behaved like one.
He stirred his coffee and pondered that while he glanced through the papers his dad had set out.
One name stood out, Cynderella Cleaners. He started to pay attention after that, waiting to hear the plan.
"And next on the agenda is Cynderella Cleaners, one woman operation, I've already floated the offer past her guy. You may have seen her car around, crazy thing painted like a pumpkin coach. Clever really, except who'd want to be seen in it?"
There was laughter around the table, but not from Pearce.
"Why are you interested in her company? Seems like small potatoes."
"It is Pearce, we're just clearing the decks for new accounts. It's easier to win the business when there's no competition, and if we buy her out we're almost grandfathered in."
"Huh, yeah, I get it. She cleans my place, does a great job," he pointedly did not mention the cookies, "seems like she's got some good branding going on."
"Exactly, which is why we don't want to compete against her. She is small potatoes, and she's a one woman operation, and she's growing. We don't believe she'd be a significant threat, but why not own the market if we can? We've made the offer, and given her business manager a deadline. We expect she'll take it."
"Why?" said Pearce, doodling idly on the pad in front of him.
"Why what?"
"You said she'll take it, Why do you expect she'll take it?"
"It's a sweet deal, that's why. She won't have to compete against us for business, and she can go do something else with her time, invest the money. She does okay, but our sources show she hasn't got a lot of savings. This would provide that, some freedom and some security."
"Seems to me she has lots of freedom," Pearce said under his breath.
"What? Did you say something?"
"No, no, go on." Pearce said, but didn't mean.
The meeting droned on for another hour, mostly he thought so that his father could show that he owned them on Saturday too. What was that his dad had said about freedom for the Cynderella gal? He sure felt like he didn't have any.
Once the meeting was finally over they stood and began to clear out. Pearce glanced at the page he had been mindlessly drawing on during the meeting. It was covered in pumpkins of all shapes and sizes. He tore the page off, and crumpled it up. Then he paused. He un-crumpled it and folded it carefully and stuck in in his blazer pocket. He didn't know why exactly.
*******
CYNDI
Cyndi called Gooch from the parking lot. "I'm not going in, I changed my mind."
It was the eve of her first Tinder date and she was already sorry and she hadn't even gotten inside yet. She had picked him for terrible reasons really. Like for instance he hadn't said anything offensive right off the bat. Which wasn't a resounding endorsement, but it was less common than she would have guessed. There had been no
mention of sex play involving cotton candy, which one guy had suggested. He hadn't said anything about piercings in unspeakable places, so he was in. Terrible reasoning.
"Why aren't you going in?"
"It was a mistake, I'm not cut out for this."
"For dating? It's hard to get anywhere if you don't date. I mean unless you want to join a cult and be a sister-wife or something."
"No, this meeting strangers out and then..."
"Everyone is a stranger until you meet them. Go inside, have fun. Call me when it's over."
"Okay," Cyndi sighed. "Fine. Just, fine..."
"You'll do great, it's going to be fun. Look, I'll send you a bail out text in 25 minutes, if it's awful you'll have a way out, and if not, I'll talk to you later."
Cyndi breathed a small sigh of relief, it was a lifeline anyway, if not a whole life boat. "Great, thank you," she said, and she straightened her skirt, checked her lipstick in the flip down mirror on her visor and headed inside.
She sat at the bar and ordered her apple-tini and scanned the crowd. None of the men at the bar looked familiar, but then who knew what picture the guy was using. She checked her watch, she was a few minutes early anyway.
She kept her eye on the door, and spotted him before he saw her. He looked a lot like his picture, to her relief. A point in his favor.
She caught his eye as he approached the bar and he said "Cyndi?"
"Yes, Poe, did I get that right? As in Edgar Allen?"
"Yep," he laughed, "mom was a librarian. What can I say?"
Well, she thought, librarian is normal, maybe his mom was pretty normal? That's good, right? Normal parents, normal men?
They chatted quietly for a while. Cyndi relaxed and then her phone binged. It was her bailout text and she texted back that things were fine.
"Was that your bailout text?"
"What?" Cyndi asked, she could feel the blush in her cheeks.
"I always like to at least
get past the bailout text. I don't blame you, men don't have the market cornered on weird you know? Some of the women I've been with are a little crackers. You get used to it," he paused, "shall we have dinner?"
"Sure, I'd like that, thank you."
As they walked to their table Cyndi noted his clothing, nice shoes, no white socks, his pants fell at the right length, he had a nice butt. So far, so good.
"I'm Ally, I'll be your waitress this evening, may I start you with an appetizer?"
"We'll have the clams casino, as a starter, then the braised lamb shanks for dinner."
Cyndi was so startled she didn't know what to say. Clams and lamb? At the same meal? And how did he know whether she liked them or not?
"Um, I'm not sure," she started to interrupt.
"Well, I am, I've been here before, and those are their best two dishes. The chef and I are friends from way back, you'll enjoy it."
"But clams and then..." she started, but he interrupted her again.
"No, it's exactly right, you'll see."
And from there, the date just went downhill. He told her about his sports career, starting with Little League and up through high school, where he sat on the bench for all of senior year. His love of snakes and spiders and his collections of photos of them. She was certain that the only thing creepier than photos would be specimens, and she was half waiting for him to pull one out of his pocket.
When it came time for dessert, Poe offered to split a piece of cake with her "We have to watch our figures don't we?"
Cyndi stared at him in stunned silence. Had he just made a weight reference, on the first (and what would definitely be the only) date? She was already feeling vaguely ill from the dinner and appetizer combination but he didn't know that, surely she deserved her own piece of cake after this, "No, I don't think so, but thank you."
"Oh, I insist, the chocolate cake here is to die for, and I know how you girls are about chocolate."
"How us girls are?" Could this be any worse? Yes, she knew it could have been so she just focused on getting the hell out of there.
"I have to be at work early tomorrow, so if you don't mind, I'm going to have to decline. In fact I think I need to be going now."
He looked at his watch, "Oh, it's early, stick around."
"No, really, I don't think so."
"I brought my cuffs," he whispered, leaning forward and almost dragging his tie through his dirty plate.
"HUH?" she gasped.
"My cuffs I brought them, you girls like that BSMD stuff, right?"
"I think you mean BDSM, and no, no I don't think I do."
"Oh, well," he sighed, "let me see, your half of the check..."
Cyndi had practically stopped listening at this point, this was too much. Dutch? Really?
"Here," she said as she threw down some bills on the table, "this will more than cover my half, thanks, have a good night."
"I'll call you!" he shouted cheerily after her.
"Don't bother," she whispered under her breath as she hurried to her car. Pulling out her phone she texted Gooch right away, 'Never again for dinner, only for coffee. Worst date ever. Get out the ice cream.'
Gooch laughed until her sides shook as Cyndi described her date.
"It's not funny you know, I'm never doing this again!"
"Yes you are, you know you will. You have to kiss a lot of frogs.." she dissolved in laughter again.
"Okay fine," Cyndi said "but I am done with dinner dates. To think I shaved my legs for that. I'll never get that time back you know?"
"Save it for your book, girl."
"I'm not writing a book, thanks."
"Well, maybe you should consider it, that was hilarious."