Tiopa Ki Lakota (38 page)

Anpo considered his statement, her eyes drifting away from his to study the building he pointed at. The smell of horse and cattle dung was strong from it and she suspected that was where they kept their animals.
Just like themselves. Cramped into their lodges and away from the world.

Stewart waved again and nodded, his eyebrows lifted in question. He wasn't even too sure she'd understood his words until she nodded as well and lead her mount towards the barn. With a sigh, he scooped up the reins on the spotted mare and followed, the colt trotting to keep up with its mother.

It was full dark and Anpo smoked her pipe as she sat on the ground near the porch. The evening had been full of strain and discomfort. She'd met her
tunkasi

when he'd returned from the fields. It seemed that he liked her even less than Stewart and Rachel did. The warrior had endured as much of his rude stares as she could, despite her
winuhca
explaining that he shouldn't watch her so intently. Anpo finally fled to the comfort of the darkness.

The only natural light was the waning moon overhead. A warm glow came from the windows of the cabin where the sounds of talking and laughing could be heard. Anpo took another puff of her tobacco, listening to her woman's laughter.
She is happy now. She is with her family.

An irrational melancholy hit the dark woman as other thoughts invaded.
She is ashamed of me. Her family is not mine, they hate me because of what I am.
Anpo shook her head in irritation.
How can they hate me if they do not know me? I do not understand.

Watching the tendrils of smoke rise from her beechwood pipe, her mind was far away.
Is that why Ketlin is ashamed of me? Because of what I am?
That didn't sound right, however, else the blonde would have been shamed in Anpo's presence long before they arrived here.
Why is she ashamed of me here and not at home?

She recalled
McGlashan

intently questioning her about their relationship. When Anpo had told him they were joined, her woman dived into the conversation and deflected his questions elsewhere.
Being joined as a Lakota is the same as being married for Ketlin's people. Is she ashamed that we are joined? Why?
So many questions roiled about her thoughts, all of them aimed at Kathleen's strange behavior whenever mention of their bond came up. None of them were good, all casting shadows of doubt on what Anpo had always thought was firm and solid.

The door to the cabin opened and a man was silhouetted in the firelight before he stepped onto the porch and shut it behind him.

Anpo braced herself as the elder stepped into the yard and settled down nearby on the chopping block.

"Nice night," he began, pulling out his own pipe.

The warrior knew she couldn't ignore him.
He's my tunkasi! An elder!
But her culture forbade her to speak or look at him. Swallowing hard, she simply nodded.

McGlashan eyeballed her as he loaded the bowl with tobacco. "Don't talk much, do ye?" When no answer was forthcoming, he shook his head. "No, don't answer that. I just like statin' the obvious." He reached for the burning stick that Anpo had used to light her own pipe, pulling it from the ground and puffing contentedly.

They sat in awkward silence, smoke from their pipes mingling high above their heads.

The man sighed explosively. "Look, lass, I don't like yer kind," he began, pointing his pipe at her, his face showing annoyance. "Haven't since they killed my son-in-law and stole my daughter." He glanced back at the cabin, hearing Kathleen telling a story to his family. His face softened somewhat as he looked back at the warrior seated in the shadows. "But ye brought her back to me, to us. And fer
that
, I'm grateful."

Again, Anpo nodded.
It is his way of thanking me.

"You just let me know if ye need anything before ye leave in the mornin'," McGlashan said, tapping the pipe against his bootheel. "We ain't got much, but we can give ye some kinda reward for bringing Kathleen home to us."

The warrior blinked, not understanding for a moment.

Rising to his feet, the older man put his pipe away and peered out over his dooryard. "Ye can sleep in the barn tonight." No further words were spoken as he returned to the cabin and went inside.

Dark eyes narrowed in puzzled thought. She replayed the short conversation in her mind several times, pulling out the bits and pieces and fitting them together. Anpo's eyes widened when the connections were made.
My tunkasi thinks I am leaving my winuhca here! That I brought her home to stay!

The warrior surged to her feet in surprise and denial. "He does not understand," she murmured. "I must have Ketlin tell them we are joined, that she is my
winuhcala
." But the memory of meeting Stewart, of trying to explain to the blonde's parents, of Kathleen interrupting and changing the meanings of her words stopped Anpo.

Ketlin had no choice but to join with me
, Anpo mused as she stepped silently onto the porch.
She had been captured and was a slave. I won her in a wager.
The warrior eased closer to the window and peered inside.
What if she does not want to be with me...?

Kathleen was telling her family about one of Teca's many inquisitive altercations. This one was about the time he had found the basket of huckleberries and ended up inside, purple from head to toe. Her dark blue eyes were sparkling in joy as she held her sleeping son, the lilt of her accent sounding like music to Anpo's ears.

She seems so happy here. More happy than I have ever seen her.
A lump developed in the warrior's throat. The vision reared its ugly head once again.

Smiling fondly down at the childlike Anpo, the woman with yellow hair caressed her cheek. "Mahasanni ki," she repeated. She took the toddler's hand and walked away.

The light intensified until it surrounded the mother and child, so bright she had to hide her eyes. When she was able to see, there was nothing there.

Inside the cabin, Kathleen wound up her story, delighted at making her parents laugh. She thought she saw movement at the window but when she looked, no one was there.

McGlashan rose from his stool and stretched. "Well, I think it's high time to be off ta bed," he suggested.

Taking the hint, Rachel agreed, putting her knitting to one side. "Aye." She stood as well. "Kathleen, you and Teca can have your old bed in the loft. Do ye need help getting him up the ladder?"

Looking at the familiar rungs that led to where she had slept through her childhood, the blonde shook her head with a soft smile. "No, mum. I can make it blind with my hands tied. Teca won't make a difference." Kathleen looked out the window into the night with concern. "Where's Anpo?"

Her father, who'd been banking the fire in the hearth, looked over his shoulder as he replied. "Told her she could sleep in the barn tonight."

Kathleen's immediate feeling was one of denial. To not have her warrior close in her sleep would be difficult. She eyed her parents and brother who were blissfully ignorant and the words of rebellion dried up in her throat.
It's only for tonight, lass. They don't know and ye haven't told them... Tomorrow...

The older woman swept her daughter up into a hug, kissing her cheek lightly. "It's good to have ye home, Kathleen," she murmured. "Good night."

Distracted, the blonde smiled and returned the kiss, her arms still holding Teca. "It's good to
be
home, mum... I've missed ye all so much." Tears stung her eyes though they didn't overflow.

Tears were in other eyes, as well, eyes that were dark and stormy with loss.
Ketlin is home. Her home is not with me.
Anpo turned away from the window and trudged back out to the yard, her shoulders sagging.
When she comes to sleep, I will speak with her on this matter.

Kathleen rose early, as was her habit. The sky was still a dark grey, hardly visible through the cracks of the shutters that covered the window. With slow, gentle movements, she eased away from Teca and covered him with the blanket.

It had been a long and exhausting night. The combination of a stuffy interior, a strange bed and nightmares had made it difficult to sleep. That her warrior wasn't with her certainly hadn't helped matters any.
It was only the one night, lass
, the blonde consoled herself as she slipped her leather dress over her head.

Deciding that the toddler would still be asleep for a bit, she made her way to the top of the ladder. Peering past the hastily created divider - a sheet hanging from a rope - she found Stewart's bed unoccupied.
Must be already up and about then.
Kathleen quietly made her way down the steps.

She stepped out onto the porch, slowly closing the heavy wooden door so as not to disturb her parents sleeping nearby. Inhaling the cool morning air, the blonde stretched before relaxing to look about.

The sky was getting lighter and the yard was awash with several shades of grey. A chicken could be heard clucking nearby, the stamp of a horse echoing from the barn. Kathleen wondered if her warrior was awake yet and stepped off the porch.
Hmmm.... Time for a cuddle, lass.

A flash of Anpo's confused face drifted across her vision before she banished it.
Aye. Ye've gotta explain what happened yesterday!
She shook her head ruefully.
Why did it not occur to me that I'd have to clarify Anpo's presence with my family? I guess I just wasn't thinkin' too well last night.

With memories of the reunion playing in her mind, Kathleen approached the barn, a small smile on her face. The door was ajar and she slid inside without disturbing it. The warmth drifted over the blonde as she stood still for a moment, allowing her eyes to adjust to the darker interior.

One of the ponies nickered and the woman moved towards it, the smile still on her face as she recognized her own mount. Movement in the stall further on caught her eye as she held her hand out to the spotted mare, getting a welcome nuzzle in response.

"Stewart?"

A blond head popped up from the other side of Teca's pony. "Morning, sis!" her brother said.

Kathleen continued forward, a curious grin on her face. "What are you
doing
in there?"

As her sibling came into full view, he shrugged sheepishly and stepped forward to lean against the wooden railing. Stewart held up his hands, both adorned with brushes. "Just thought I'd have a look at yer horses. They're pretty dirty," he added, turning to look back at the yearling. "Don't those people know how to take care of 'em?"

Not liking his tone with "those people," Kathleen's smile faltered. "It's a completely different way of life, Stew. And the horses get quite a bit of attention." She shrugged as well. "And the Lakota don't have horsebrushes."

"Nor shoes, by the looks of it," Stewart agreed, heedless of the cultural lesson. He reached out and patted the grey on his neck. "Gotta admit, though, this fellah's a pretty healthy one. How long ye had him?"

The blonde looked away, distracted. "Just over a year. Anpo caught him for Teca." Scanning the barn, she asked, "Where is she? I don't see her pony."

"Pony!" Stewart exclaimed, turning around again. "That red bugger was huge! Hardly a 'pony'!"

Kathleen rolled her eyes. "Ye know what I mean, ye brat." Her eyes searching the interior again, she continued, "No, really.... Where's Anpo?"

The young man turned back to the grey yearling. "Already left."

The blonde felt the world fall out from under her and she caught the stall to remain on her feet. "Wh... wh...
what
!?"

Unaware of his sister's anxiety, Stewart's attention remained on the horse. "She was all packed up when I got in here." Taking the brushes, he began to vigorously move them across the grey hide. "I offered some supplies, but she turned me down. Honestly, sis, after she left I had a look around. I don't think she slept last night. At least she didn't look it this morning. She gave me something for ye, though."

She left me...?
Kathleen shook her head, trying to rid it of the numbness that threatened her vision. She left me!! "Did she... Did she
say
anything?" she asked, surprised her voice didn't crack.

"Aye, she did." Her brother turned to look at her, his face becoming concerned. He hastily dropped the brushes and moved forward. "Kath? Ye okay? Ye look like ye've seen a ghost!"

With surprising strength, the blonde grabbed Stewart by the arm. "What did she say to you!?
Exactly
!"

Stewart winced a bit as fingers dug into the skin of his forearm. "Something about ye being happier here and yer home wasn't with her. She said she was throwin' ye away, but I took that to be her ignorance and not knowing the right words." His eyes widened as he watched his sister turn even whiter. "Sis?"

Kathleen's fingers released his arm and she turned to stumble towards the door. She barely made it outside before she fell to her hands and knees. Strong arms held her shoulder and she could hear her brother's voice from a distance. His words were indistinct, drowned out by her own thoughts.

She threw me away! Divorced me!! She thinks I want to stay here!! Oh my God! I should have come to her last night! I should have talked with her, slept with her, held her! How could she do this!?

Curling into a little ball, the blonde felt as if her head and chest and throat were going to explode. Great braying sobs racked her body and she trembled with their force. Something metallic was pressed into her hands and she found the tin whistle with its braided leather decorations.

Miles away and heading north, a reddish horse galloped at full speed, its rider barely keeping attention on the terrain. Dark eyes wept for the loss of a loved one, a heart closed away from the pain. Anpo was too far away to hear her
winuhca's
scream, too far away to feel its power.