To Have And To Hold: The Wedding Belles Book 1 (25 page)

“You didn’t email me back,” she said, pulling her mouth away to dot kisses along his jawline. “Eight emails, you didn’t respond.”

He let out a low chuckle. “Someone’s been counting.”

“Someone’s been ignoring,” she countered.

He stilled for a moment, before his hands slid down from her shoulders to her waist. “Isn’t that what a soulless man is supposed to do?”

Brooke sucked in a breath, not just at having her own tantrum thrown back in her face, but at the hurt in his face. At the pain in his eyes.

“Seth.”

He didn’t give her a chance to respond, instead slamming his mouth down on hers once more with even more force this time, the heels of his hands digging into her rib cage as he held her against the wall, his mouth bruising, punishing . . .

And she wanted it. She wanted it all.

Her tongue tangled against his, her fingers clawing at his shirt as her purse dropped to the floor with
a messy thump, the keys in her hand falling with a noisy clank as they wrestled with each other’s clothes, heating each other’s skin even through the thick layers of their winter coats.

Brooke’s hips tilted forward, needing to be closer, and Seth hissed out a curse as she rubbed against the bulge of his erection.

He slammed a palm against the wall behind her head before pulling back, groaning in frustration as he did so.

His breath was warm on her cheek, and Brooke kept her eyes closed, relishing the closeness, just for a moment.

“What are we doing here?” he asked.

Brooke could only shake her head. “I have no idea. I don’t know how to think around you. I have things all planned out, and then . . .”

“And then what?” he asked huskily.

“And then you look at me, and I just, I just
want
.”

“I take it this wasn’t in your plans,” he said, gently resting a thumb against her cheekbone.

“You mean Maya playing matchmaker? I had a hunch when she insisted you tag along, but I definitely didn’t plan on her ditching us.”

“I’ll admit I’m having a hard time being pissed at her just now,” Seth admitted.

Brooke opened her eyes to meet his. Their icy blue was unreadable. “I’m actually kind of glad she left. There are things I need to say, and I’m grateful not to have an audience for it.”

He slowly pushed back from the wall, moving his warmth away from her, and her fingers clenched in
a reflexive urge to tug him back. To tuck against his body and ask him to hold her. Or kiss her. Or take her against the wall, or . . .

“I’m listening,” he said.

Seth crossed his arms, and the closed-off stance definitely didn’t bode well for his reception of her apology. But she had to try.

Buying time, she knelt, picking up her purse, shoving the spilled lip balms and umbrella and hair bands back in. She picked up the keys in her other hand, jangling them in her palm nervously as she stood up once more and looked him in the eyes.

“I need to say that I’m sorry,” she said, deciding on directness.

His eyebrows lifted. “For?”

“You brought me breakfast and I . . . freaked out. Unnecessarily so. And I said some nasty things when I left your place that morning. Things I didn’t mean and that aren’t even true.”

He looked away, and Brooke’s chest squeezed. She reached out a hand, her fingers touching his forearm. “They aren’t true, Seth. I was feeling uncomfortable after the intimacy between us. I was embarrassed I stayed over when I didn’t mean to, and the whole thing—it felt like too much.”

“Can I ask you something?”

She nodded.

“Are you mad because I offered you breakfast? Or because you wanted to stay?”

She opened her mouth to deliver a safe, diverting quip about not being a morning person.

Then she saw the bleak look of vulnerability on
his face, and she realized that she wanted to be a little bit brave. For him.

“I freaked out because I realized I wanted more than the breakfast,” she said. “I went in thinking I wanted only the sex, thinking I could be okay with that, but I ended up getting cuddling and breakfast, and then I wanted more. I wanted . . .”

“Lunch?” He supplied when she broke off.

Brooke let out her breath on a little laugh. “Yeah, maybe. But then what if I’d wanted lunch to become dinner, and then dinner had turned into more sex, and then more sleeping over, and then, you know,
repeat
.”

“Would that be so bad?” he asked, taking a step closer to her. “Us spending more time together?”

Her heart knew exactly how it felt about that question. It jumped a little in excitement at the very suggestion of it. Her brain, however . . .

“Give me a chance, Brooke. I may be a bit ruthless, too ambitious for my own good, and cold as ice, but what you see is what you get. I can offer that much, at least.”

“You’re not cold,” she whispered, moving closer to him, her eyes locked on the knot of his tie, which was just slightly less tidy than before, courtesy of their groping.

“No?” he asked huskily.

She shook her head. “I shouldn’t have said that. And I definitely shouldn’t have said that thing about you being soulless. It was cruel, and I’m not . . . that’s not usually me. Know that. Please tell me you know that.”

His
blue eyes searched her face, and though she tried desperately to read through the mask, she had zero idea what he was thinking just then.

And then he pulled away. Slowly. Gently. But a rejection all the same.

“Show me the rest of the place,” he said quietly, turning back to the large, empty space behind them.

“Right.” Brooke blew out a breath. This was why they were here, after all.

So he hadn’t accepted her apology, but he hadn’t outright rejected it, either. She supposed that was something.

“You’ll have to use your imagination,” she said, putting her shoulders back and chin up and trying to get back into a professional headspace. “But as you can see, it’s plenty big should Maya and Neil opt for the larger wedding, but if they decide to go more intimate, it’ll be easy to partition off some of the space, give it a more intimate feel.”

“How is Neil these days?” Seth asked as he clasped his hands behind his back and began walking around the perimeter of the room.

Brooke gave a little smile as she followed after him, the click of her heels echoing softly. “You mean has he tried to stuff your sister in the trunk of the car, or stolen money from her wallet, or shown up to a tux fitting with three other wives in tow?”

Seth gave her a look. “Your email reports have barely mentioned him, which, as you’ll remember, is the entire reason I wanted the reports in the first place.”

“Honestly,” Brooke said, “I’ve barely seen the guy. Maya said he’s been busy with work, and
other than when we toured this particular facility for the first time, he’s more or less left it up to us women.”

“What did he think of this?” Seth asked, his eyes looking around, taking in every detail.

“He liked it, but then, as far as I can tell, Neil tends to like everything Maya likes. She could say she wanted to get married on a rowboat in the Hudson, and he’d think it was the best idea ever.”

“Or at least he’d
say
he thought it was the best idea ever.”

“Right,” Brooke said patiently. “Because that’s what fiancés do. I know you’ve still got your big brother cape on, but Neil’s behavior is pretty standard for grooms. They walk a fine line. Even the sweetest, easiest of brides can get a bit touchy with the groom and his level of involvement in the planning. If he doesn’t have any opinions, he’s disinterested. If he has too many, he’s difficult.”

Seth stopped and turned toward one of the windows. “It still doesn’t feel right.”

“It may never feel right to see your sister get married,” Brooke said quietly.

“You’re probably right,” he muttered.

“What I wouldn’t give to have recorded that,” she said lightly. “Is there anything else you want to see? I can show you the bathrooms. They’re gorgeously remodeled, and there’s this marble that’s just, well, you’ll have to see it.”

He turned back toward her, and the gentle look on his face caught her off guard. “I’ll take your word for it on the bathrooms.”

“Fine,
fine, miss out on the gorgeous faucets they selected. I mean, they’re fabulous, but now you’ll have something to look forward to when you come back for the actual wedding.”

“So you think this is the place?”

“That’s up to Maya,” she hedged. “And Neil. But if it were my wedding, this would be my place.”

“Why?”

Typical dude question, and Brooke didn’t have an immediate answer. Instead she took her time, walking in idle circles before turning back.

“I have no idea.”

Seth laughed. “At least you’re honest.”

“It’s just like a feeling, you know? Like when you move to a new city or neighborhood and walk into a restaurant and know it’s going to be your place. Or when you’re house hunting, and you step through the front doors after seeing dozens of ‘meh’ and you just know.”

“Is that how you picked your current apartment?” he asked.

“Eh. Not really. I mean, I like it, don’t get me wrong, but I picked it out of practicality of needing a place to live more than anything else. It’s not my forever home.”

“At least it’s more permanent than a hotel,” he said, his gaze level.

Crap. Once more she was reminded of the fact that in the last conversation they’d had, she’d compared him to a hotel building. “I actually
didn’t
criticize it, but you seem to think I should . . .” she said. “There’s absolutely nothing wrong with where you
live. And if it makes you happy—that’s what counts, right?”

“If it makes me happy,” he repeated slowly, precisely, as though this were a new concept. “Indeed.”

They both fell silent, staring at each other for long seconds, although it wasn’t awkward so much as necessary. As though they were trying to learn the other person, reading what they weren’t saying.

But what had started as curious suddenly started to feel a bit heated. The air between them seemed to grow heavy, and Brooke’s thoughts had wandered from what was going on inside his head to what he looked like under his clothes. She knew now, of course, but she wouldn’t have minded a refresher course.

Time to retreat.

She lightly jiggled the keys in her hand. “Shall we get going?”

He nodded once, following her toward the door. Brooke lifted her hand to switch off the lights at the same time he did, his big hand covering hers, and she gasped at the contact, as though she were some pubescent girl touching the hand of a boy for the very first time.

She jerked her hand away, but he only flicked off the lights, slowly, purposefully, as though she weren’t acting completely jumpy and weird.

The ride down the elevator was silent, and Brooke wondered if Maya would be pleased or disappointed with how her manipulation had turned out.

On the plus side, Seth hadn’t refused to speak to her.

On the plus plus side, he’d kissed her.

On
the negative side, he’d seemed to regret kissing her, even as it was happening.

And even worse, he seemed in no hurry to do it again.

Brooke locked up behind them, pulling her scarf out of her bag as they walked toward the sidewalk. Still silent. For a second she thought he might offer her a ride in his car out of that unwavering chivalry he seemed to carry about him, even when he didn’t like someone.

He didn’t. Instead he looked at her, nodded once as though he’d come to some conclusion in his head that she wasn’t privy to, and turned toward his car.

Swallowing her disappointment, Brooke stepped toward the curb, her eyes scanning for an available taxi, knowing it was going to be a long shot on a Friday evening when everyone was eager to commence their Friday-night activities.

Which for her would likely involve a frozen dinner and another rerun binge of
Sex and the City
.

“Brooke.”

She glanced over her shoulder. Seth was standing there, hands shoved in his pockets as he watched her. He stepped closer. “You said you were afraid you wanted more.”

“Yeah?” she said, her hands slowly falling to her sides.

His jaw clenched. “You said . . . you said that after breakfast, you were afraid you’d want lunch. And that after lunch you’d want dinner.”

“Right,” she said nervously.

“Have dinner with me.”

Oh.
Oh
.

He took another step closer, hands still shoved in his pockets, his shoulders hunched up around his ears like he was nervous. Nervous she might say no.

“I’m hungry, and I’m here, and if you don’t have plans, I’d like to take you to dinner.”

She swallowed. “To discuss wedding stuff?”

He shook his head once. “No. Because I want more, too.”

B
ROOKE
BIT OFF A
piece of her steak, dragged it through the buttery sauce, and popped it in her mouth with a happy little sigh. “This place is
magical
. How’d you find it?”

Seth picked up his wineglass, debated a lie, then went with the truth. “It was my ex’s favorite. We came here a lot.”