To Love & Protect Her (14 page)

It wasn't all that mattered, Griff thought. He had let Willa down, and Ryan, too.

“Betsy is in the custody of the El Paso police,” he said stiffly. “She confessed to everything, including the fact that she was the one who'd shot at Mattie. She probably won't be charged with a crime in connection with Clint's death, because she saved my life and probably Willa's, not to mention her own. But I suspect she'll be charged with attempted murder for shooting at Matilda. The police told me she'd probably undergo extensive psychiatric testing.”

Ryan shook his head. “Clint has hated all Fortunes since my father bought the Lockhart ranch from Clint's father. I had no idea he'd go this far, though.”

“Has anyone told Mary Ellen and Jace that their brother is dead?” Griff asked.

Ryan nodded. “I called them both as soon as you told me what had happened. I called all of my children, too. After all, Clint was their uncle.” The older man ran his fingers through his hair, and his face sagged. Suddenly he looked far older than his years. “I never meant for things to go this far. I didn't want Clint to die, even after all he's done. I suspected he
was behind the attempt to abduct Willa, but I guess I was hoping he wouldn't go that far. Again.”

“It's not your fault,” Griff said gently, seeing his uncle's distress. “Clint was mad. I saw it in his face, heard it in his voice. You couldn't have done anything to stop him.”

Ryan leaned forward. “Thank God you were here, Griff. I never had a moment's regret or worry about putting Willa's safety in your hands. I always trust my instincts, and I knew you'd take care of her.”

He'd taken care of Willa, all right. He felt his face harden. He'd forgotten his responsibilities and slept with her, and, as a result, she'd been abducted from right under his nose.

“I'm going for a walk,” he said abruptly. “I have to clear my head.”

“You've been up all night,” Ryan said. “Don't you want to sleep?”

“I'll sleep later.” It would do no good to try to sleep now. He would only lie awake and think about how he had failed Willa.

“Thanks again, Griff.”

Ryan's words burned in his ears as he headed out of the house. “Hey, bro, where are you going?”

He heard Brody's voice behind him, but didn't slow down. “I'm going for a walk,” he said without looking back. “I'll talk to you later.”

“Oh, oh,” he heard Brody say to Reed. “Griff is going walkabout again. What's happened now?”

Reed's answer faded in the distance behind him, and Griff just kept walking. If he walked far enough,
and long enough, he might be able to erase the guilt that was eating away at him.

 

Willa woke up late in the day, feeling surprisingly refreshed. Daylight was fading as she swung her legs out of bed, and she realized she was ravenously hungry. Throwing on some clothes, she opened the bedroom door and saw Matilda sitting in a chair, reading a magazine.

Mattie jumped to her feet when she saw Willa. “We thought you were going to sleep around the clock,” she said.

“I almost did,” Willa admitted. “But my stomach woke me up.”

Ryan's wife Lily appeared in the hall, and she smiled when she saw that Willa was awake. “I'll bet you're hungry,” she said.

“I'm starving.”

“Come to the kitchen and I'll fix you something to eat.”

By the time they reached the kitchen, they had been joined by Matilda's new sisters-in-law, Mallory and Jillian. The four women insisted that she sit down, then brought her food and hot coffee.

After she had finished eating, Lily leaned forward. “You know we're all impatient to hear what happened,” she said. A shadow passed over her face. “We know Clint is dead. Griff told us that much. But he didn't tell us anything else. Ryan's been on the phone all day, and your Griff's not very communicative, is he?”

“My brother is a clam,” Matilda said bluntly. “But we know you'll spill the details.”

Her Griff.
The words gave Willa a warm glow, but she knew that Griff was by no means hers. He was going to be stubborn about what had happened between them. She knew him well enough to see that.

“Griff was wonderful,” she began slowly. She looked down at her plate, but felt the knowing look that passed among Jillian, Mallory and Matilda. “Ryan sent him to College Station to check on the security at my apartment, and he arrived just in time to thwart Clint and Betsy when they tried to kidnap me.”

Shocked exclamations filled the room, and Matilda covered Willa's hand with hers. “How awful,” she said, her eyes dark with concern.

Willa gave them a shaky smile. “I guess it was, but it all happened too fast for me to be scared. Griff chased them off, then whisked me to the cabin near El Paso. We're still not sure how Clint and Betsy found us.”

“I can tell you that,” Lily said. “Ryan told me that Betsy confessed that she'd overheard a conversation between Griff and Ryan. When she told Clint about it, that was all he needed to hear. Clint knew all about the cabin near El Paso.”

Willa stared at Lily, memories clicking into place. “Betsy worked here on the ranch,” she said slowly. “I knew she looked familiar. She must have been wearing a wig when she came to the door.”

Lily nodded grimly. “Apparently, Clint told her to
get a job with us so she could spy on us and keep him informed about what was going on.”

Willa looked over at Matilda. “Is Clint the one who shot at you while you were on your honeymoon?”

“No, that was Betsy. But Clint put her up to it.”

Willa reached out tentatively and touched Matilda's hand. The younger woman immediately turned and clasped Willa's hand in hers. “I'm so glad you're all right,” Willa said quietly.

Matilda gave her a grin. “So am I, mate.”

Suddenly Jillian gasped, then leaned back in her chair. Everyone turned to look at her.

“Are you all right?” Mallory asked.

Jillian nodded, massaging her bulging abdomen and giving the other women a rueful smile. “Sorry. I think this baby is saying that she wants to join the party.”

Mallory gave a radiant smile and laid a hand on the slight swell of her abdomen. “I felt my baby kick for the first time just a week ago.”

Everyone turned to Mallory and began talking at once, and as Willa watched, a curl of envy snaked through her. It surprised her, because she'd never thought about having children before.

She'd never been in love before, either, she reminded herself. She had no idea how Griff felt about children. She had no idea how he felt about a lot of things. Including her.

Suddenly edgy, she pushed away from the table. The other women stopped talking and turned to look
at her. It was now or never, she thought. If she didn't find Griff and talk to him, he would manage to get away from the ranch. And she would never see him again.

Gathering her courage, she said, “Does anyone know where Griff is?”

Mallory and Jillian gave her a slow grin. “So that's the way it is,” Mallory said. “I recognize that look.”

Matilda's eyes brightened. “Are you in love with Griff?”

Willa winced. “Are you always this blunt?”

“All the time,” Matilda assured her. “You'd better get used to it if you're joining the family.”

Willa felt tears fill her eyes. “I don't think that's what Griff has in mind. But I need to talk to him.”

“My brother is a blockhead,” Matilda said. “And I suspect he's gone walkabout. That's what he always does at home when he has a problem.”

“Gone walkabout? What does that mean?”

Matilda laughed. “I guess you could translate it as a long walk. Sometimes he's gone for days. I'll send Brody and Reed to find him.”

Willa followed Matilda out of the kitchen. As much as she liked Jillian and Mallory and Lily, she didn't want to face the understanding and pity in their eyes. She would wait outside, where the darkness could hide her tears.

 

Griff heard the sound of the truck engine in the distance, but he kept on walking. He didn't want to talk to anyone right now. He hoped that if he ignored
whoever was driving out here, the person would leave him alone.

But the sound came closer, and soon he could hear his brothers' voices, calling to him. They had spotted him, and they weren't going to go away. Reluctantly he turned around and waited for them to reach him.

“What are you doing out here? Are you crazy?” Reed asked as the truck skidded to a halt.

“Go away,” he answered wearily.

“After we went to all this trouble to find you?” Brody said. “Not a chance.”

“I've been baby-sitting for the last week,” Griff said coldly. “I'd like to be alone for a while.”

Both his brothers looked him over, then they snickered at each other and nodded. “We heard about your baby-sitting job,” Brody said. “Let's talk about that.”

“Get lost,” Griff snarled. “I'm not interested in talking.”

“Get in the truck, Griff,” Reed said, grinning. “It's two against one.”

G
riff took a deep breath, intending to tell his meddling brothers where to go, but he saw the concern beneath the laughter in their eyes. Sighing, he slid into the truck next to Brody, staring out the windshield as Reed put the truck into gear and pressed the accelerator. Griff braced himself as the truck bumped over the track through the pasture. They were heading in the direction of the house, but it would be a long drive. Griff had been walking for most of the day and into the evening. And he wasn't ready to go back to the house yet.

“Have you had your fun?” he finally asked his brothers. “Can I get out now? I told you, I want some time alone.”

Brody looked over at him. “You never left us alone when
we
were in trouble. In fact, you're always the first one there when any of us need help.”

“Who says I'm in trouble?”

Reed sighed. “Give it up, Griff. We saw your face when you drove in with Willa last night. If you're not in trouble, my last name isn't Fortune.”

“My problems with Willa, or lack of them, are my business.” His voice softened, because he knew his
brothers were genuinely concerned for him. “There's nothing you can do, anyway.”

Brody grinned. “Hell, Griff, if a brother can't meddle a little, who can? But we're not here to tell you what to do.” He exchanged a look with Reed. “We simply came to find you because Willa needs you.”

Griff shot upright in the truck, almost banging his head on the roof. “What's wrong with Willa? Is she sick? Did that bastard hurt her, after all?”

His brothers glanced at each other again, and Griff caught the look of understanding that passed between them. Then Reed said easily, “There's nothing wrong with Willa.” He gave Griff a sly look. “At least, not physically that I could see. Her heart, now, that may be another story. Would you know anything about that?”

“There's nothing wrong with Willa's heart,” Griff said coolly. “And if you're implying that I broke it, you're wrong.”

“So you didn't break her heart.” Brody's voice was too innocent. “Does that mean there's going to be another wedding in the family?”

Griff swore under his breath. “You're a couple of nosy—” He stopped himself. “Can't a man have some peace?”

“Maybe when you answer a question,” Brody said mildly. “Have you called Mom and Dad and told them about the wedding?”

“There isn't going to be a wedding,” Griff said, scowling out the window. “Is that plain enough?”

“You don't care about her, then.” Reed's voice
was quiet, and he leaned back against the seat. “That wasn't the impression I got just a few minutes ago.”

“You implied she was hurt or sick,” Griff muttered. “What did you expect me to do?”

“Pretty much exactly what you did.” Reed whistled as he drove expertly along the track, avoiding the potholes. “You'd be a fool to let her get away, you know.”

Griff continued to look out the window. Finally he said, “It doesn't matter what I want. She's out of my league. I knew that from the beginning. I let myself forget it for a few days, but I won't forget again.”

“I didn't get the impression Willa was the snooty sort,” Brody said, his voice curious. “Is she really that much of a fool?”

Griff rounded on him. “Don't ever say anything like that again.”

Brody laughed. “Just testing the waters, bro. Don't take my head off. I think Willa is just what you need. It's about time you found someone.”

“Even if she'd have me, how can I ask her to share my life? I'm gone for months at a time. And when I leave, she'll never know if I'm coming back.”

Brody and Reed exchanged a glance again. “We might have a solution to that little roadblock.”

Griff stared out at the darkness, fear clenching his gut. He wasn't sure how Willa felt about him anymore. He'd let her down, failed her. He'd allowed her to be kidnapped.

“Are you paying attention, Griff?” Reed spoke sharply.

“I'm thinking.”

“Well, you need to think about this….”

Griff forced himself to ignore the desperation inside him and listen to his brothers.

As they drove back, Reed and Brody outlined their plan.

 

The ranch house gleamed with light as they approached it, and when they reached the front porch, Reed stopped the truck. “This is where you get out,” he said.

As soon as he'd closed the door of the truck, Reed hit the accelerator, and the truck disappeared around the corner of the house. Griff was left alone in the darkness.

But he wasn't alone, he realized a moment later. Willa was on the front porch. He shoved his hands into his pockets to prevent himself from reaching for her.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“Much better.” She stayed in the shadows. “How about you?”

“I'm fine.”

He couldn't see her, but he resisted the urge to move closer. Finally Willa said, “Why did you leave, Griff? Why did you leave me alone?”

“You weren't alone. As I recall, everyone on the ranch was fussing over you.”

“That's not what I meant, and you know it. You were the only person I wanted to see, and you disappeared.”

He closed his eyes, and the words seemed to burst from inside him. “I didn't think you would want to see me.”

He felt Willa go still. “Why wouldn't I have wanted to see you?” she said, sounding puzzled.

“I let you down.” He heard the self-contempt in his own voice and turned away to look out toward the darkened pastures. “I promised to protect you, but I allowed Betsy and Clint to kidnap you. Why would you want to see me?”

“You most certainly did not let me down.” Willa's answer was prompt, and held a tartness that surprised him. “It was my own foolish fault that they were able to take me. You'd told me not to open the door to anyone, under any circumstances. And the first time someone came to the door, I opened it, anyway. How can that be your fault?”

“If I hadn't made love to you, hadn't spent the day and night in bed with you, I wouldn't have been asleep when they came to the door,” he said roughly. “That is my fault.”

“I think I may have had a little to do with the fact that you were sleeping. I don't think our lovemaking was one-sided.”

“Hell, Willa, you're twisting my words. The bottom line is, I failed you. I wasn't there for you when you needed me.”

“What happened was my own fault. In fact, I need to ask you to forgive me for not following your orders. By not listening to you, I put you in danger, too.”

“I can take care of myself,” he said gruffly. “You don't have to worry about me.”

“But I do worry about you.”

Willa watched as Griff took a step toward her. She held her breath, hoping that he would take her in his arms, but he stopped before he reached the edge of the porch.

“No one has worried about me for years.” There was a hint of wonder in his voice.

“Nonsense,” she said sharply. “I'm sure your mother worries about you every time you go off on one of your missions. To say nothing of your brothers and your sister.” Her voice softened. “And now I'll worry about you.”

“Willa,” he began, then he spun around. “We're from different worlds. And when they intersected for a few days, I ended up letting you down. It would never work.”

Willa wanted nothing more than to have Griff take her in his arms and tell her that he loved her. She yearned to hear him say that he never wanted to leave her again. But she could see he was determined. If she hesitated now, he would walk away and never look back.

So she swallowed hard and scrambled to find a less-threatening topic of conversation. She had to keep him here, keep him with her, until she could figure out a way to make him understand that she loved him and didn't want him to leave her.

And she knew she couldn't just tell him that she loved him. He'd claim it was some kind of stress-
induced fantasy, some kind of rescuer–rescuee syndrome. And then he'd turn around and run, and he wouldn't stop until he was back home in Australia.

Moving casually over to the railing, she sat down on it and looked over at Griff. “So what are you going to do now that Betsy has been captured and Clint is dead? Are you off on another job?”

He gave her a suspicious glance, as if he wondered what she was up to. Then he shrugged.

“I told the El Paso police that we would be here at the ranch for a few more days, in case they had any more questions for either one of us. After that, I thought I'd see you back to your apartment in College Station and take care of those security measures that Ryan originally asked me to deal with. Once your apartment is as secure as it can get, I'll fly back to London. I have a lot to discuss with my boss.”

Despair washed over Willa. Listening to Griff, she realized that he'd already put her in a compartment in his mind labeled To Be Forgotten. If he told himself that he didn't care about her often enough, he would begin to believe it. And he would never come back to Texas.

She took a deep breath and said, “I'm not going back to my apartment in College Station.”

His expression was sympathetic. “I don't blame you. There are a lot of bad memories surrounding that apartment now. But I'm sure you'll be able to find another place. I'll help you look when I drive you back.”

He'd dump her in the first place that looked half
way decent, then start running, she told herself. Looking him in the eye, she said, “You don't understand. Not only am I not going back to my apartment, I'm not going back to College Station or my job at the university there.”

There was real shock on his face, but underneath it, she saw a glimmer of hope. “What are you talking about?” he asked.

She focused on that tiny ray of hope, and took a step forward. “Teaching at the university in College Station was never my dream,” she said evenly. “It was always my father's dream for me. And because he was sick, I went along with him. But I won't be happy in that town for the rest of my life. I think I've known that all along, but now I'm willing to admit it. I'm going to resign my position there. I have other plans for my life.”

Griff's eyes grew brighter. But he said, his voice harsh, “You worked damn hard to get that job. You can't give it up on a whim.”

“It's not a whim, Griff. I've been restless and on edge ever since I agreed to take the job. I just wasn't able to figure out why. As soon as I made the decision to quit, it felt as if a load was lifted from my shoulders.”

“What are you going to do?” He sounded as if he couldn't stop himself from asking.

“I'm not sure,” she said. “Maybe I'll end up teaching somewhere else. I do love teaching—it's the only thing that got me through the last semester. But
now, for the first time in my life, I'm going to do exactly what
I
want to do.”

“And what would that be?” he asked warily.

She didn't answer him immediately. It was time to go on the offensive.

“Griff, why did you throw yourself on top of me when you thought Betsy was going to shoot me?”

He gave her a startled look. “I thought she was going to kill you,” he said. “Why would you even have to ask me such a thing? Of course I would try to protect you.”

“If she had been trying to kill me, she would have shot you instead. You risked your life for me.”

“Of course I did. I would do anything to protect you.” He stopped abruptly, apparently realizing what he'd just admitted.

But it was too late. Willa had seen and heard the truth, and her heart eased in her chest.

“I would do the same thing,” she said gently. “If the situation had been reversed, I would have given my life to save you.”

“You can't feel that way about me, Willa,” Griff said, and his tone was desperate. “You deserve someone far better than me.”

“Oh, Griff,” she said, stepping closer to him. “You're exactly what I need.”

With a groan, Griff reached out and pulled her into his arms. His hands held her tightly, and she melted into him. Burying his face in her hair, he muttered, “I'm not good enough for you, Willa. I don't know
if I can ever give you the stability and steadiness that you need.” But his hold on her didn't loosen.

“I don't need stability and steadiness,” she answered fiercely. “All I need is you.”

Griff raised his head, and his eyes glittered in the moonlight. “I'm not sure why, but I'm damn glad. But you'd better be sure, Blue. I won't let you go easily. You're everything I've ever wanted and didn't think I would ever find.”

He bent his head and kissed her, searing her with the intensity of his emotion. He kissed her like a dying man who had been brought back to life. His lips clung and held, telling her without words how much he wanted her.

And she answered him back in kind. She had been telling him no more than the truth—he was everything she wanted in her life. And she never wanted him to let her go.

He groaned deep in his throat and pressed her against the railing of the porch. She felt the tension in him, felt the desire quivering through him, and she wrapped herself around him. Her body yearned for his, yearned to be complete. And only Griff could complete her.

He slipped his hand underneath her sweater, and his fingers were hot and trembling against her skin. She pressed into him, urging him to take her. He groaned again as he caressed her back, feathering his touch down her spine, lingering at her waist until she burned and throbbed for him.

With shaking hands she began to unbutton his shirt,
needing to touch him, to feel him close to her. When she pressed her mouth against the hair on his chest, he bent his head to nuzzle her ear. But when she fumbled with the waistband of his jeans, he gently took her hands and held them away from him.