Kat was already on her phone. “Texting
Georgie.”
We were showered and dressed within the
hour. I wore tight jeans with my red strappy heels and a white
blouse that fit snug at the waist.
“Kat. Emily. Looking good,” the bouncer Dan
said as he held the door open for us. “You girls hear? Real good
band playing tonight. Matt hired them a few weeks ago. Have that
Hinder feel.”
“Oh raspy voice. Like it. Wicked. Thanks,
Dan.” Kat kissed him on the cheek, and we strolled in, quickly
finding Georgie at a table near the stage. She had Raven with her
who looked completely out of her element, all curled into herself.
Her shoulders were slouched, hands clasped together in her lap; her
head was down and her face hidden by her long, stringy hair. I
wanted to wrap her up in my arms and just cry for her, but I
suspected that would be the last thing she’d want.
We drank, talked, laughed ... well, all
except Raven. Although, at the beginning of the evening I did chat
with her a few minutes. I was surprised when she initiated the
chat, leaning forward in her chair and looking up at me. She had
dark circles under her eyes as if her mascara, that she wasn’t
wearing, had smudged. She asked where I was living now. I smiled
and went to put my hand over top of hers, but stopped mid-approach
when she flinched back in her chair.
I told her about the farm and the horses
then suggested she come by and I’d take her riding. I thought her
eyes would light up at that—they didn’t. Dead. Dull. It was really
eerie how she had no emotion except fear. Every movement made her
jump, and she looked nervous and uncomfortable. I understood why. I
mean I didn’t, but I probably did better than anyone here. It would
take a long time before she trusted again. If ever.
Kat and I danced a few times while Georgie
stayed with Raven. I was on my fifth cosmopolitan by the time the
band came on, and I was feeling it. I mean really feeling it as I
danced to the music, letting myself get lost in the beat.
The band rocked. The lead singer was a
thirty something blond with piercing blue eyes and a deep voice
that gripped the music like he was part of it. We danced, drank,
and laughed until my sides were hurting.
The band finished, and we were on our last
drink as Matt had cut us off—to which we all laughed hysterically.
He rolled his eyes and walked off giving Brett the cut sign over
the throat. Brett and I met eyes then we both laughed. I nearly
toppled off my chair and suspected I would’ve if it hadn’t been for
the hand grabbing my arm and holding me upright.
I glanced up. “Hey, thanks.” Then I smiled
when I recognized him. “Oh, you’re the singer.” Shit, I was
slurring, and he had two noses.
He chuckled. “Yeah, Princess.” He nodded to
Kat, Georgie, and Raven. I noticed the other three band members had
already sat at the table. Raven was looking uneasy as one of the
guys, I think the lead guitarist, started quietly talking to
her.
Lead singer guy pulled up a chair beside me
and sat on it backward, leaning his crossed arms on the back of it.
“That last song was for you ...”
I held out my hand. “Emily.”
He took my hand and kissed the back of it
then smiled. My blurred vision took in the dimples on his cheeks.
“Ethan.”
“Yep, I know you.” I found myself leaning
too far forward in my seat. I remembered his face; Kat showed me
his picture in the Toronto Now magazine a few months ago.
“Not yet, but you will.” He took my hands,
and his thumb stroked back and forth across the backs of them. “No
boyfriend tonight?”
Nope. No Logan. He was extinguished from my
mind. Numerous cosmos could do that to a girl. “Nope.”
“Good to hear, Emily. You want to give me
your number?”
Number? That was fast. “Um, well ...”
“It’s just a number, Princess. Been watching
you all night and know I’d like to talk to you some more, but looks
like Matt is shutting down soon, so your number would be nice.”
“What the hell ... Why not?” After all, I’d
given it to Logan. Who cares if this guy had it too? I was on a
roll. Didn’t seem to matter much tonight. Actually nothing mattered
except finishing off my drink. I gulped back more of it before
reaching into my purse and pulling out my phone. I typed in the
password, well it took me three tries, then passed it to Ethan.
“Might as well give me yours so I know who’s calling when you
call.”
“Hey, you know you have twenty missed calls?
Popular girl.” He was typing in both our phones then passed mine
back.
Twenty missed calls? I squinted as I glanced
at the number. Logan. Shit. My phone lit up again, and his number
flashed. Fuck. I quickly clicked it to silent and put it in my
purse.
Ethan’s brows rose. “Not into talking, I
take it.”
“Nope. Not ... to him.” I leaned closer and
bit my lower lip. I felt daring, bolder now. I was pissed, both in
the angered way and in the drunk way. What is he doing calling
twenty times? I’d normally be in bed sleeping by now. Why the hell
was he calling so late? Why hadn’t he called me earlier?
Kat pushed back her chair and came to her
feet, swaying a little. She had her phone to her ear and was
yelling at someone. When her eyes darted to me I knew who it
was.
“God, Sculpt, she’s fine. What’s the big
deal? And if she doesn’t answer her phone, she doesn’t have to. How
the hell did you get my number anyway?” Silence. “Fuckin’ Ream.”
Kat shook her head, pulled the phone away from her ear, and pressed
End. “You get that, Emily?”
I nodded.
Kat glanced at Ethan then back to me. “Think
we should go. Washroom first.” Kat snagged Georgie’s hand. None of
them ever went to the washroom alone—ever.
“What was that about?” Ethan shifted his
chair closer. He reached forward and ran his finger across my chin.
A soft, feathery touch that should’ve sent goose bumps waltzing
across my skin ... instead, the caress sent nothing.
Ethan was rock star hot—tattoos, lean, tall,
sexy as hell on stage with his raspy voice and sweet roll of his
hips. Exactly what I promised to stay away from, and yet, tonight I
felt like taking chances. I needed to prove to myself that I had
control.
I leaned closer into his touch as did he.
His finger stopped caressing my chin, and he cupped the nape of my
neck, pulling me closer. We were a breath away and I wanted him to
kiss me. I wanted him to erase the stamp of Logan.
“You’re sweet, Emily. Real sweet, I’m
guessing. And I’d like you to come back to my place tonight.”
Ethan’s hand tightened, and I suddenly felt a tremor run through
me, and it wasn’t a good tremor.
“Emily.”
I jolted back as Matt came up beside me
holding his phone. “It’s Sculpt.” Then he turned to Ethan. “Hands
off, Ethan.”
Tonight was Forget Logan night, and I was
doing a fine good job of it. Cosmos and Ethan.
“He’s worried about you. I told him you’re
good, but he wants to hear your voice. What do you want me to tell
him?”
“Give me the phone.” Logan had no right
calling Kat and now Matt trying to get to me. God, what was his
problem? Why was he being like this?
“I don’t think—”
“Matt. It’s fine.”
Matt placed the phone in my hand, but kept
hold. “You sure?”
“Let go, Matt.” He hesitated a few seconds
then released his phone.
Ethan still held me, his hand having slid
down to my waist.
“You want this gig, take your hands off
before I make you,” Matt said, glaring at Ethan. “She’s drunk,
man.”
I put the phone to my ear as Ethan put both
hands up and sat back.
“Stop calling.” It was said in a mumbled
slur.
“You’re drunk.”
This is why I knew I shouldn’t talk to him.
It was like his voice curled me into him—tight. All this work
trying to drink him out of my mind and he plowed back full force
with a few words.
“Emily. It’s two in the morning.”
“I’m ... stamping you ... out.”
“Excuse me?”
“The stamp. I have to get rid of it.” I knew
my words were mumbled with the cosmos at full effect.
“Is Kat with you?”
I looked around. “Nope. Just Ethan.”
Silence.
“Ethan? From Strikeback?”
I turned to Ethan. “You from Shrrikeback?”
My words came out very slurred, but it sounded like he understood
me.
“Yeah, Princess. My band.” He smiled and
winked.
“He says yep.”
“Did I just here him call you Princess?”
Ummm.
“Give him the phone. Now.” Oh, he sounded
angry. What I needed was another drink. I passed Ethan Matt’s
phone. “He wants to talk to you.” I stood then stumbled to where
Brett was cleaning off the bar. It took me three tries to get onto
the bar stool.
Brett nodded toward Ethan chuckling. “I can
hear Sculpt shouting from here. He just told Ethan he’s going to
kick his ass when he gets back.”
“Oh God, no. He ... he can’t do that.” I
didn’t want Logan fighting anyone. I knew he hated it and ... Logan
had gone to Mexico to fight for his father—to save me.
I nearly fell onto my ass when I went
scrambling back to Ethan and grabbed the phone from him. Logan was
still shouting something about his woman.
“Logan. Logan ... Stop yelling.”
He went quiet then, “Eme.” He sighed. “I’m
glad you’re out with your girls. But ... you need to go home. I
need you to be safe, baby.” I heard him swear as something crashed.
Someone yelled in the background, maybe Ream or Crisis.
“Logan?”
“If anything happened to you ... I just—damn
it, I need you to be safe.”
God, he sounded so worried. I didn’t
understand what the big deal was and right now my head was pounding
and I couldn’t think straight.
I sank into the chair, my head in my hands.
“I can’t erase you. I tried, but I can’t.”
“You can’t erase what’s engraved.”
“Yeah,” I mumbled.
“Give the phone to Matt, baby.”
“Okay.” I passed it to Matt, and he kissed
my brow before striding away, phone to his ear.
Kat was walking toward me, her brows raised
at something over my left shoulder. She looked surprised and a
little worried. I spun around, well I stumbled around, and had to
grab the chair for balance.
“Oh look, trouble just walked in and is
sucking the fun right out from between my legs,” Georgie said as
she followed Kat’s gaze.
Kat looked at me then back at Deck. “You
think he’ll have a cosmo with us?”
Georgie picked up the remainder of her
cocktail and chugged back half of it. “Can you really see Deck
sipping on a cosmo? Besides, you see that wrinkle between his
brows? Yep ... right pissed, like turnip-up-the-butt kind of
mad.”
I was either too drunk or too emotional
after Logan’s words to say anything. I slipped down into the chair
closest to me, my ass cheek half off cause I kind of missed. Deck
was making his way toward us, and his scowl was the kind that would
have most running. I’d have hid under the table if I thought it
would do any good.
Not sure why Deck’s eyes were on me, as if
I’d just brought hell down on him. I picked up my cosmo and slurped
the last of it, making a loud sucking noise. Matt suddenly was at
my side, and he snatched the drink from my hand and slammed it down
none to gently on the other side of the table.
“I’m not happy,” Deck said. Was Deck ever
happy? I mean, really, he rarely spoke, and when he did it was
serious.
“I am. Fantastic night,” Georgie said
smirking. “Cosmo, Deck? Might make you smile.”
His eyes darted to Georgie, and she cocked
her hip and held up her nearly empty drink. He grabbed it, chugged
the contents back then tossed it on the table. “You see me smiling,
Georgie?”
“Nope,” Kat said and laughed.
Deck wasn’t laughing. He was pissed. I was
thinking either Logan called him, or Matt. Not sure why; I mean, we
were out having fun and were a little drunk, but girls did that,
and it was fun, and we were allowed to have fun.
“You get why I’m here?”
Georgie, Kat and I looked at one another and
giggled while we shook our heads. Georgie was the only one smashed
or stupid or brave enough to answer.
“You’re hoping I’m drunk enough to take me
home and fuck me all night long in every orifice possible?” Georgie
said.
“Jesus, Georgie.” Matt groaned.
Deck’s brow lowered, and his hands clenched.
“I’m not doing this shit every fuckin’ night, Georgie. You need to
get your crap together.”
What was he talking about?
“I don’t need a babysitter.”
“Seems like you do. And dragging Raven out
with you? What the fuck were you thinking?”
“She asked to come,” Georgie objected.
Deck scowled. “Yeah right. Get in the car.
All of you,” Deck ordered, and even though I could see Georgie
wanting to protest, she didn’t.
I knew she was going out a lot, but the
conversation sounded like she was “going out” a little too often,
and Deck didn’t like it.
Georgie walked over to Raven who was still
sitting with the guitarist from Strikeback and put out her hand.
Raven ignored her hand, but rose and followed behind her as Georgie
waved to Matt and the band as if she hadn’t just been given shit by
Deck.
I started walking to the door when Deck fell
in beside me. He gave a chin-lift to Matt who was on the phone, my
guess with Logan.
“You’re drunk, and you may not remember what
I’m telling you, beautiful, but you need to hear it anyway.” Deck
pulled me to a halt before we reached the car. “He should’ve
fuckin’ told you the other day what went down after you left that
shit hole. He didn’t—his choice. Not mine.” Deck grabbed my arm to
steady me as I swayed. “It was bad, Emily. Real bad. He gained my
respect for life for what he did for you, walking back into that
hellhole ... Hard to get my respect, easy to lose it.”