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it more completely if he’d used his boot heel. Then he took a

long drink.

“What’s it taste like?” Zane asked. He seemed remarkably

detached for a man who was talking about ending them. 205

Ty pursed his lips and sighed. If Zane intended for this

to be the last night they were together, then Ty was going to

make the most of it. He took another sip, then spun on his

stool to face Zane. He reached out for Zane’s shirt and pulled

him closer. Butterflies started in his stomach, like it was the

first time he’d ever tried to kiss his lover. Zane stiffened but

allowed Ty to draw him near, his lips parting. Ty pressed

his lips to Zane’s. Once his tongue slid along Zane’s, Zane

shuddered and gave a barely audible moan.

The kiss felt like they were back at square one trying to

decide how brave they had to be to initiate something. Ty was

almost light-headed with nerves.

Their lips lingered too long before Ty pulled away and

met Zane’s eyes. They were a little wide, but Ty suspected it

had nothing to do with the kiss and everything to do with the

absinthe. The taste was distinct, as were its effects. Ty could

already feel it working its way through him, calming his mind

and body, enhancing the sensations of touch and smell. It

couldn’t soothe the ache in his chest, though.

“Fuck,” Zane whispered, and he licked his lower lip.

Ty eased back onto his stool and took another sip from

the heavy glass. “This was my life for two years,” he finally said.

“I almost lost myself to it.”

Zane propped his elbows on the bar and folded his hands.

“I can see how you’d get lost in this lifestyle. You’ve never

seemed to have an addictive personality, though, so I’m a little

surprised.”

Ty finished off the drink, shivering as it went through him.

He set the glass down with a loud clunk. “You’re not the only

one who fights things every day, Garrett. Yours are just harder

battles, closer to the surface. Mine . . .” He swallowed and

peered around the bar, taking in the overwhelming mystique

206

of something ageless in the air and in the city. It shimmered.

He didn’t finish what he was saying, lost in the glow until he

felt the touch of warm fingers on his hand.

“Grady, come back,” Zane said quietly.

Ty tore his eyes away from the shimmer and met Zane’s

gaze.“That stuff must have a hell of a punch.”

“Easy to get lost in,” Ty murmured.

“Yes,” Zane said under his breath. His façade cracked, and

suddenly he looked devastated. Like he’d given up. “You are.”

Ty stared hard at him. For the first time it began to sink

in that Zane might truly mean to leave. There might not

be anything Ty could say or do to stop it, and suddenly he

couldn’t sit there any longer. He pulled his hand from Zane’s

grasp and stepped away. “I’ll take watch upstairs,” he said,

voice hoarse. His boots crunched on the broken glass at the

base of the staircase as he walked away.

“Ty,” Zane called after him. Ty paused on the bottom step.

Zane hesitated long enough that Ty took another step before

he spoke. “Do I really know you? Do I know Ty Grady at al ?”

Ty studied him, trying to parse the anger and pain into

something that didn’t feel like he was dying. Zane was still

sitting at the bar, his eyes dark and wounded, his shoulders

slumped. One chance. That was all Zane was willing to give,

even if it broke them both. Ty shook his head and started

back up the steps, speaking in a low voice as he went. “If you

have to ask that, I guess not.”

207

Chapter 10

wo hours after Ty left him, Kelly joined Zane downstairs

T
for the changing of the guard.

“Nick’s got upstairs,” Kelly told him.

“Great,” Zane grunted. He started up the steps, each crunch

of the glass bringing him closer to another confrontation with

Ty, to a night of sleeping with his lover right next to him and

feeling like there was a stranger in his bed.

When he reached the top of the steps, he took a deep

breath to steady himself. It was harder and harder to curb the

anger growing. He’d had two hours to think of nothing but all

the times Ty must have lied to him to keep from being caught,

all the times they’d talked about Zane’s time in Miami that Ty

must have been digging for information.

All the times Ty had simply looked him in the eye and

lied.His twenty-year party. He had seen Richard Burns there,

and now he knew exactly where Ty had disappeared to. He

hadn’t been retrieving that damn orchid from his car. God

knew what they had been discussing. Zane’s hands balled into

fists and he stopped on the steps. He wanted to stomp up there

and clock Ty just to get the anger out, just to do something.

And his entire body screamed for a drink. He wavered,

fighting the urge to go back and pour himself a whiskey.

The familiar rumbling undertone of Ty’s voice stopped

him.Ty and Nick were at the far end of the hal , standing

outside the room Liam must have taken. Zane studied Ty’s

208

silhouette in the dim hal way. He seemed rigid and tense. He

spoke with extensive use of his hands, but nothing of the low

murmur reached Zane’s ears.

Goddamn, Ty. Why couldn’t he have made this easy?

Why did he have to tell Zane the truth about his assignment?

Why now? Why not hold onto it like he said he’d wanted to

instead of breaking Zane’s heart with it? Why did he have to

accept the assignment at al ? He should have just used some

backbone and said no!

Zane would have said no, had their position been reversed.

That much he knew. He would never have kept a secret that

big from Ty, not after that first week in New York. Trust was

all they’d had, and Ty had used it, abused it. The only thing Ty

was afraid of was saying no to a set of orders.

Ty headed down the hal . Behind him, Nick rested his

back against the wall and slid down to sit. Zane supposed that

was where Ty had set up camp too. Right outside Liam’s door,

using shadow for cover, with a direct view of the only exit. He

wondered what Liam thought about having an armed guard

at his door, about not being trusted without a handler on top

of him.

Then Zane realized he knew exactly how Liam felt.

Ty stopped in front of Zane, both of them standing in the

doorway to the room Ty had once occupied. Zane gritted his

teeth when he met Ty’s eyes.

“You want to talk?” Ty asked. “Or are you still too mad

at me?”

“You don’t think I deserve to be mad for a little longer?”

Ty’s eyes searched over Zane’s face, then he stepped into

the room. He kicked his shoes off, pulled his T-shirt over his

head, and tossed it at the table.

209

Zane followed, pul ing the door closed behind him. He

made sure to lock it.

“You’re seriously going to leave it at that?” Zane said,

voice pitched low. They were in the room with the pages

plastered to the walls. He had confidence in Ty’s work, that

they couldn’t be overheard.

Ty faced him. He shrugged. “What do you want me to

say? I told you I was sorry. I told you why I did it. And you

know what, Zane? I’d do it again. In a heartbeat. Because I

was protecting someone I love.”

“You weren’t protecting me, Ty, you were spying on me.

The fact that you don’t see that, that you’d march right down

that road again without thinking twice, that scares the piss

out of me. How the hell can I trust you now?”

Ty rolled his eyes.

“You were meeting with Burns in Baltimore, weren’t

you?” Zane growled.

“Burns wasn’t in Baltimore, Zane!”

Zane took several long strides and grabbed Ty by his

shoulders, shoving him up against the wal . “Stop lying to

me!”Ty’s eyes flashed and he clenched his jaw, baring his teeth.

“Call me a liar one more time and I’ll put you down.”

Zane’s grip tightened. His breaths came harder and faster.

Maybe a good knock-down, drag-out fight would do them

both some good. Zane certainly wanted to smash his fist into

Ty’s teeth right now.

He pushed away instead, backing toward the door so he

wouldn’t be tempted to lash out. “You might want to get

used to it. That’s the kind of stuff you call people who lie for

a living.”

210

“Where are you going?” Ty demanded.

Zane turned his back on him. “I need a drink.”

Ty had to take a few seconds to gather himself before he

could follow Zane out the door. He’d be goddamned if Zane

headed down there to drink, not because of him, not without

a fight. He glanced down the hall as he pulled his shirt back

on. Nick had come to his feet, his gun in hand.

“What’s going on?”

Ty waved him off. “I got this.”

He hurried down the steps and reached the barroom just

in time to see Zane pouring a snifter full of whiskey.

“Zane.”

Zane glared at him, and Ty had to fight every fiber of his

being not to avert his eyes. He plowed on, though, stepping

up behind the bar, opposite Zane.

“I’m going to give you ten seconds to get the fuck away

from me,” Zane snarled.

Ty’s heart stuttered. He had never seen Zane like this,

had never known he even had it in him to seethe like this. He

squared his shoulders, though. “I’m not going to let you do

this.”Zane held perfectly still. He didn’t even seem to be

breathing. “You did this, Ty,” he said, then lifted the glass to

his lips.

Ty grabbed his wrist. The whiskey spilled all over the

bar. Zane stood so fast that his stool clattered to the floor. Ty

barely managed to block Zane’s arm before the glass crashed

into the side of his head, then Zane reached across the bar

211

and grabbed Ty by his shirt, lifting him off the ground and

dragging him across the bar top.

Ty could do nothing but grasp Zane’s forearms and hold

on as Zane yanked him off the bar and threw him to the floor.

He rolled and pushed to his hands and knees, then to his feet.

Zane picked up the barstool beside him and swung it with

one hand, as if it were nothing more than a pillow.

The stool crashed to the floor at Ty’s feet as he staggered

back. He was both shocked that Zane had lashed out and

chastising himself for not expecting it. He knew how deeply

he’d hurt Zane, and he knew what happened when Zane’s

anger went unchecked. He should have known. Zane’s rage

only served to calm Ty further.

“Everything I’ve done, Ty, I’ve done it for you!” Zane

shouted.

Ty was peripherally aware of Kelly hovering near the

bar and Nick and Liam standing on the stairs watching. He

waved at them to make sure no one interfered. He couldn’t

have anyone getting hurt in a scuffle. He shook his head as

Zane came at him. “Not like this, Zane,” he tried.

Zane’s fist flew at him. Then again. Ty was able to block

the first two punches, but the third caught him in the kidney

and he doubled over. Waves of pain almost brought him to his

knees. He lunged forward, wrapping Zane up to try to stop

him without hurting him. He refused to throw a punch in

retaliation.

Zane shouted, his voice full of anger, pain, and betrayal.

He picked Ty up and slammed him against the large wooden

support beam in the middle of the room. The glass of a picture

frame cracked against Ty’s shoulders. Ty tightened his hold

on Zane’s arms, locking him down, trying to immobilize him

before he hurt himself or Ty.

212

“I’m sorry, Zane,” he gasped, trying to hold tight.

Zane pressed his face into Ty’s neck, fighting back a sob.

His entire body was trembling.

Ty dug his fingers into Zane’s back, holding him close. He

put his lips to Zane’s ear. “I’m so sorry.”

Zane’s shoulders tightened under Ty’s hands. “I would

have chosen you over anything,” Zane hissed. He pulled back,

breaking Ty’s hold, bunched the front of Ty’s shirt in both

hands, and jerked Ty forward until they were nose-to-nose,

until Ty’s feet weren’t solidly on the floor. “My job, my family,

my wife. I would have given my life for you! But you! You

can’t even give me the truth!”

Ty only had time to squeeze his eyes closed before Zane

picked him up and tossed him sideways. He crashed against

one of the tables and slid with it as it tumbled over amidst

breaking glass and bits of splintered wood.

It took him a moment to get his wits about him. The

others were wide-eyed and gaping. Ty rolled to his stomach

and pushed up, accompanied by the tinkling of glass from a

broken hurricane lamp as it cascaded down his arms and back.

Zane was framed by the neon light coming from the bar

behind him, casting him into darkness and shadow.

“Jesus, Zane,” Ty muttered.

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