Tracked by Trouble (Bad Boys Need Love, Too #3) (10 page)

A month into his training for the triathlon, Zed looked at himself appreciatively in the mirror. His muscles were sculpting into long, lean and powerful. He’d never be the muscled powerhouse like Jace but he didn’t care. Not vain by any means, he nodded, dressed and thought of Beck. He’d left the ball in her court and nothing had happened, but he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Maybe she thought he wasn’t interested? The only way to find out was to stop by the bar and see her.

He thought of the lingering issue with his brother. Jace hadn’t come up with any answers, he and his sister never spoke about it, and the guy was halfway around the world. Maybe he’d never have to deal with it again.
Right. More like, I’m happy to spin in an avoidance pattern.

A truly morbid thought whirled through his head.
Maybe he’ll get killed and we can all remember him as a hero.
He blanched at that thought, thinking himself a real coward if that was his best plan of action.
To wish my brother killed so I don’t have to deal with him?
He could kick himself in the nuts right now.

When he arrived at Tapt’s, he hot-footed it into the bar. No Beck. He approached the bartender. “When’s Beck working?”

“Beck?” the male said. “She doesn’t work here any longer. Got a real job.”

Of course, she did.
Zed rapped on the bar top, said, “Thanks,” turned and strode away, disappointed.

When he pushed open the door, exiting the dimly lit bar to the light of the outside, he nearly collided with her. “Beck! I came here to talk to you.” Dressed in jeans, a loose fitting sweatshirt, with a colorful, jeweled headband pushing back her long tresses, he inhaled sharply.
As stunning as ever…

She seemed guarded, not the vivacious young woman he’d met a few weeks ago. “Why do you want to talk to me?”

“I, uh…I wanted to find out if you got your sofa back.” He smiled at her.

A flicker of pain passed through her eyes. “Yes. I got it and gave it to Goodwill. I needed something new.”

“Oh, well…that’s good…I guess.”

“Yeah,” she said, forlornly. “Look, I came here to get my final paycheck. I’ve been so busy. I haven’t had a chance to pick it up.”

“New job, huh?”

“Yes.” A real smile crossed her face. “I got a job at a medical office on Newton Street. It’s a dream come true job.”

“That’s fantastic! Congratulations! You want to…you want to get something to eat with me? Go for a walk?”

“I don’t know, Zed.”

All kinds of awkward uncertainty swirled through his system. He hadn’t really thought this through, but he never anticipated being met with such glumness and lack of interest. “Okay. Well, if you change your mind, you’ve got my number.” He started to push past her when her hand reached out and grabbed his biceps.

“Wait. I’d like to walk with you. Let me…” She hesitated. “Let me get my check, I have to talk to my former boss, but I’ll be back in ten minutes.  I’ll meet you in the parking lot.”

“Great.” He nodded. “See you in a few.” He sauntered out toward his truck and leaned against the glossy black exterior, folding his arms over his chest. Suddenly, this didn’t seem like such a good idea. But if it put things to rest and he could let her go and move on, maybe that was for the best.

When she emerged from the bar, she still carried herself in that slumped, depressed kind of manner as when she came in.

What happened to her? Did her boyfriend rough her up? Is she a victim of abuse?

“Hey,” she said, when she got closer. “Want to walk along the water?”

“Sure.”

They walked the few blocks down to the waterfront in uneasy silence. The blue gray water reached toward the hilly horizon, silky and calm. A white and green ferry chugged in the distance, making the scene look like a postcard.

Zed finally cleared his throat and said, “I hope I’m not imposing by asking you to walk with me.”

She looked surprised. “Why would you say that? This isn’t an imposition at all. I’m surprised you sought me out. I thought you…well, I saw you hugging someone on the sidewalk a few weeks ago—a pretty blond. I thought you’d moved on—and my final ending with Tyler was messy. I’ve been thinking about what you said…you know, about how endings say something. I don’t think my ending with Tyler says much about me.”

“Why’s that? What happened?”

She shook her head. “I’d rather not say.”

Zed’s eyes narrowed. He regarded her with concerned eyes, cautious about how to proceed. “Are you wanting him back?”

She gave a quick shake of her head. “More like… feeling like I don’t deserve you.” She swallowed and looked away. “And if you’ve found someone new, I understand.”

“You saw me with my sister,” he said, wanting to assure her. “She’s a hair stylist. You should see the black roots she’s sporting these days. She even dipped strands of her hair in black to make it ‘cohesive.’” Zed chuckled. “You never know how she’s going to show up. One minute it’s green hair, the next it’s bleached blond.”

Beck smiled warmly—her first deeply warm smile. It made her face radiant and beautiful.

“I get it. Endings suck, even in the best of times. I lost my father a few years back and it was rough.”

“Oh, Zed, I’m sorry. What happened?”

“He had a heart attack. Massive. Didn’t stand a chance. He lived life large, ended life large.” He waved his hand in the air. “I want to hear about you. What’s so terrible about your ending?”

Tears moistened Beck’s vivid hazel-green eyes. “Look, I slept with him, okay? It was a mistake. I felt sorry for him because he injured himself in practice. I knew it was a stupid move. After that, he texted me and phoned me and left messages which I never listened to.

“Then, he trapped my car in the parking lot of the PT office when I got off work. He said I’m an indecisive bitch. Why didn’t I call him back? Why didn’t I do this, do that? He said it’s over. He can’t keep being yanked around by me. Can you blame him? He peeled out of the parking lot after telling me he hoped I rot in indecision hell.” Her body shook as she confessed. “It’s just…it’s over, Zed. One hundred fifty percent done. Burnt to ash.”

“Do you wish he hadn’t ended it? Do you want him back?” he asked again, insecurity surfacing.

“No!” she said forcefully. “I mean…I can’t put my finger on it, but it wasn’t working. He’s a good guy but he’s a ball player. A life on the road is what’s in front of him. He wanted eye candy. Someone to show off as he made the rounds. He made the majors recently. That’s not the life I want to lead.”

“Wow, what team?”

“Mariners.”

“Good for him. That’s quite an accomplishment.”

“Yeah, it is. And I’m happy for him. It’s not the kind of life I want for myself, though. I
like
what I’m doing. I got this job at Dr. Johnson’s. He’s the orthopedic surgeon in town.”

Zed liked the way her face grew animated when she spoke about her work. “What do you do? Are you a PT?”

“I’m in my clinical residency.”

“That’s great, Beck. I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks.” She beamed at him. “I’m happy for me, too. I can’t believe I landed this job. I thought there’s no chance in hell I’d get it. I was handed the job two weeks before I graduated. I hadn’t even passed my test yet.”

“They must have seen something special in you. That’s wonderful.” Zed felt genuinely pleased for her. “As for you and your ending…” He paused, turning to face her. “Don’t give yourself a hard time about it, honey. Sometimes we know something isn’t working but don’t have the courage to step off the ledge. We drift backward. It happens. There’s safety in the known.” He cringed, thinking of his brother.
Or in avoidance of confrontation.

She gave him a curious look that made his insides turn to mush. “That’s a nice thing to say. I’ve been pretty critical of myself for the last couple weeks. I figured you deserve someone who’s willing to make up her mind about you and apparently, that’s not me.” She let out a sarcastic laugh.

She bit her plump, delectable lip, and his cock twitched.

“How do you know unless you try?” he asked her. “How do you know you’re not able to make up your mind about me when all we had was one fine date?”

“I
have
been thinking about you a lot,” she teased.

His cock grew in response. “Yeah? I’ve been thinking about you, too.”

“Are
you
willing to try with me? I’m a heartbreaker.” She put the back of her hand against her forehead in a dramatic gesture, saying the word heartbreaker with a southern accent.

“Sounds like you were uncertain. You loved the guy but it wasn’t working and you didn’t know how to quit. There are lots of songs speaking to that very thing. Maybe he went home every night and sang that old Radiohead song,
Creep
.”

She laughed. She had a lovely, lilting laugh that made him happy inside.

“I’m a creep,” she sang. “I’m a loser. Sorry, that’s not Tyler. The guy’s ego is huge. He probably hoped I was more like that song,
Crush
, by Garbage. Remember that one from a few years back? I would die for you, I would die for you,” she sang. “Not me.” She chuckled.

“You have a pretty voice.”

“Thanks.” She gave him a little smile. “He probably thought to blame me. I’m
sure
he thought I was to blame
.
He’s right. And he’s right about himself. He’s a catch. He’s just not
my
catch. He’ll make someone else happy.” She smiled a sad smile. “Well,” she said, her eyes lighting up. “Let’s do another date and see where it heads. I’d like that. I’m free tonight and then I’ll be out of town for a week.”

“Where are you going?”

“The clinic is flying me to Minneapolis to a specialty training. We get a lot of military at the office and their needs can be different.”

Zed’s insides jumped in alarm, like a jaywalker escaping a collision with a bus. “What kind of training?”

“You know, working with the effects of PTSD, loss of limbs, things like that. It must be brutal to be a soldier.”

“Yeah.” Zed tried to put a shield over his thoughts.

Beck gave him a quizzical look. “What did I say? Where’d you go?”

“Nothing. My brother’s a marine. Lately, I’ve wondered if he has PTSD.”

“A lot of soldiers get it. It’s pretty traumatic in battle, from what I hear. I can’t imagine.” She shook her head and turned to resume walking. “Maybe I’ll be able to help him…your brother. You know…if this works out.” She flicked her finger back and forth in the space between them.

“I doubt it,” Zed said quickly. “He needs…I don’t know what he needs.”
I need to change the topic, fast.
“So, where do you want to eat? Or what do you want to do before you leave? I can fix you something at my house. That might be more relaxing for you. I’m a decent cook.”

“Oh, I love cooking. I can help. We can do it together. What ingredients do you have?”

“Let’s see, I went shopping recently. Pasta, veggies, chicken, salad fixings, bread. I’d thought of making something with fettuccine. I can stop and get some wine, beer, soda whatever you like.”

“That sounds great. I’ve got to head to the house and check on Sidekick. He needs to eat, too.” She did an about face to head back to their vehicles and reached for his hand.

An instant jolt of pleasure launched through him at the contact. “Bring him over. I’ve got acres of land for him to get into trouble in.”

“Do you? Are you sure? He’s a good dog; he won’t be any trouble. Did you notice how old he is? Poor guy has a gray muzzle and he’s got some joint issues but not to worry—he’s got a Physical Therapist on duty. A live-in PT. He’s in the right place at the right time.”

It was then, right then and there, as Beck chattered about her dog and her job, Zed felt a flicker of hope, a spark, that perhaps he’d met “the one.”
Still. Better not to get ahead of yourself.

Beck couldn’t believe the artistry surrounding her. “Your place is unique. I like it. I love the landscaped yard. Everything flows.” She glanced around at the trees and meandering gardens. Sidekick trotted by her side, appearing pleased, as Beck and Zed explored the outside. The entire sprawling yard looked like a constant, ever-changing work in progress.

The second she’d arrived, she and Zed had launched into an easy comradery. She liked the guy, through and through.

“Thanks,” Zed said. “When I bought it, it was a small home from the sixties. Nothing much. I’ve put a lot of time and energy into it. I like to keep my hands busy.” He gave her a teasing smile that sparked a small bonfire between her legs. He led her to the front door, opening it and holding it open so she could step inside.

“Let me give you the tour. This space…” He strode through the house and pushed open the bathroom door. “Will have one of those Japanese soaking tubs in it, overlooking a garden of some kind. Maybe one of those Zen type gardens, I haven’t decided yet. And in here…” He took a few steps and gestured to the living area they’d just strolled through.

“I’m thinking of opening this whole area up, so the kitchen flows into an eating area which flows into the living area. Get rid of that wall there. Add more windows. I like big spaces like that. The kitchen’s largely finished,” he said, leading her into the spacious room. “I need to finish the island and add a backsplash behind the stove. What do you think of this?” He bent down to rummage in a box and pulled out a slate blue-gray and coppery colored tile that shimmered when he moved it to and fro. “Like it? This will be the backsplash.”

“Wow, that’s really pretty. I do like it.” She moved closer to Zed to finger the textured ceramic tile. “You have good taste.” She liked the way he smelled. He had a melony-minty soapy scented smell, coupled with musky male. Actually, there wasn’t a thing about him she didn’t like, from his dark brown hair to his booted feet.
Handsome, sexy, kind, articulate—what’s not to like?
She glanced at his strong arms. “I can see the results of your workouts.”

She ran her fingers along his forearm, delighting in the feel of his tan skin and the dark silky hair lining his arms. “How’s that going?” She lifted her head to see him staring at her seductively, a slight smile on his face, his eyelids lowered over simmering blue eyes.

He licked his lips and said, “It’s going great. So far, so good.”

She shivered. Something about him spoke of slow burning passion and sensuality, not like the frenzied lust she’d experienced with Tyler. “Great. That’s great.” She turned away from him, lest she’d combust. “Do you play guitar?” She pointed to an acoustic guitar on a stand in the corner of the living room.

“I like to strum a bit, yeah.”

“Maybe you’ll play for me later?”

Again the slow smile formed. “Depends on if my hands are free. They might be otherwise occupied.”

Sweet baby Jesus.
“So. Should we get busy in the kitchen?” She felt all hot, bothered and nervous, not like her usual self.

“We can do that, sure.” He gave her an easy smile. “What can I get you to drink?” He pulled wine and pale ale out of the cloth bag on the counter.

“Red wine, please. Where are your glasses?”

“Right there, Beck honey.”

Beck honey…
she’d been called a lot of things—baby, babe, bae, even bitch came to mind. No one had called her honey, not the way Zed said it.

He leaned past her, putting one hand on her shoulder, leaning into her back, brushing the side of her face with his other arm to point to the sparkling, clear glassware hanging by their stems near her head.

The touch intoxicated her. “Well, duh. They were in plain sight.” She felt uncharacteristically jittery.
Calm yourself.

“Here.” He pulled a corkscrew off a hook on the wall, seized the bottle of wine and pushed the metal screw into the cork, twisting it free.

She watched his forearms flex, the muscles ripped and lean. His fingers were long and strong. They looked like an artisan’s fingers belonging to a hard-working man.

He gave her a generous pour and set the wine bottle on the counter.

“Would you like wine?” she asked. She reached for the stem of her glass, trying to calm her jumpy nerves.

“Maybe later. I’ll start with an ale.” He twisted the top off a bottle of beer and lifted it to her wine glass. “Cheers,” he said, and took a long swig, never taking his eyes off of her.

The fire between her legs began to roar. Her eyes slid away from him, as she attempted to get a grip on her soaring libido. “So. Tell me, Zed Farrell.”

“What would you like to know?” he asked her. “I’m an open book.” He pulled a wooden cutting board out from underneath the counter.

“Have you ever been in love?”

“Not really, no.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Not kidding.” He handed her a sharp knife. “Cut these please.” He handed her carrots, bell peppers, garlic and celery. “Slices, nothing fancy. Oh, mince the garlic if you don’t mind.”

She got busy with the task, grateful for something to do. “How is that possible?”

“I don’t know. It’s the way I’m wired. Don’t get me wrong,” he said, as he pulled another cutting board free. “It’s not like I’m incapable of loving.” He took the package of free-range chicken breasts out of the fridge and began to slice them into small chunks. “I thought I might have fallen for my friend Jace’s twin sister, but…” His shoulder lifted and fell. “Turns out she’s a junkie.”

“Ew, really?”

“Yeah. She overdosed more times than any of us can count. I’ve liked a few of the girls I’ve dated, felt a lot of affection for a couple of them but…” He shrugged. “Nothing serious ever came of it.”

“Why do you think that is?” She took a sip of her wine.

“I don’t know, haven’t thought of it too much. I guess I’m a romantic hopeful. I’m waiting for someone to rock my world.” He gave her another scorching look that ignited her insides. “I won’t throw my heart into the ring for just anybody. Hearts are meant to be cherished.”

Sweet Jesus, he’s adding lighter fluid to the flames,
she thought, as a whirl of sensation ripped up her spine. “Isn’t that a lot of responsibility to heap onto one woman?” she asked, feeling all fluttery inside.

“Not if it’s right. Not if it’s meant to last. If it’s not, we share some good times and move on. Nothing wrong with that, is there?” Again with the easy smile. “I’m not a possessive stalker if that’s what you’re wondering. I’ve learned not to be attached.”

She suspected he was the opposite of a stalker. The least sign of lack of interest and he’d be outta there. “I wasn’t wondering.”

His words spoke of lightness, casual enjoyment of the female population, but a fragment of pain pulsated across his face. Beck studied him for a second. Depth, longing and wariness looked back at her. She felt the urge to tread carefully with this guy’s heart. If she thought Tyler had been wounded by her flaky indecision, this man might be devastated. “I have a habit of not being able to make up my mind,” she blurted, wanting to lay her cards on the table. “I take a while to commit. For a while I thought I might be one of those commitment-phobes, you know?”

“I’ve never had a ring on my finger, honey.”

Even the way he called her “honey” spoke of friendship and warmth.

“I’ll bet you’re the kind of person who needs a lot of freedom to make up her mind. You don’t like to be corralled into a decision.” He smiled. “All the while feeling the need for support and acceptance.”

Beck studied him. Had he really said that? He seemed to have nailed a characteristic she’d never been able to put into words.

“Seems like we’re a couple of people who know what we don’t want, and hope we’re able to recognize the real thing when it comes our way.” Again, the scorching blue gaze met her eyes.

Lord, lord, lord,
Beck thought, her core growing hot and moist. “When Tyler showed me the results of what that kind of wishy-washy behavior can lead to, I started to wonder if I had any business dating. That’s why I never called you.”

Zed’s eyebrows lifted, then his face grew serious. “It depends on what you’re looking for…what you want out of a relationship. Do you even know what that is?”

“Good question.” She took a sip of her wine. “I think the usual applies—I want to be loved, cherished, and adored for who I am. I want a relationship that’s a joy, not a drudge. Shared interests and compatibility. I don’t want to be someone’s project.” She smiled, trying to appear light and playful, while her insides throbbed with heat.

“Everyone wants that, Beck. I’m no different.” Zed gave her a soulful look.

Simple words, spoken with serious regard and a depth of feeling Beck had never experienced in a man. She wanted to fan her face. “Uh, where do you want these?”

He rinsed his hands under the faucet, dried them with a dish towel, opened a cupboard and pulled out several stainless steel bowls. “You can use one of these.” He held one out to her. “Okay to give the chicken skin to Sidekick?”

“I don’t think he’ll object.”

Zed pulled a plate off a shelf, dropped the skin on top, and held it out to the dog. “Come on, pup. This is for you.”

The Labrador, who’d been sleeping in the corner, scrambled to his feet.

Zed placed the plate on the floor.

He swallowed the tasty treat in two bites, looking up at Zed with eager eyes.

“That’s it, Sidekick.” He rummaged in another cupboard, retrieved a huge pan, filled it with water, and set it on the stove, turning the burner to high. “And for a while it didn’t make sense to get attached. In high school, my brother—the marine— had a slimy way of taking what I wanted out from under my nose.” Zed reached up to stroke his soul patch thoughtfully.

“That’s mean.” She felt a surge of protectiveness.

“It wasn’t the most pleasant thing. And then Jace did the same for a while. Long story. We’re over it.”

“I can’t imagine any woman being so easily whisked away.”

“I don’t put up much of a fight. You shouldn’t have to beg someone to be with you,” he said derisively.

“Yeah, but you’re hot, Zed. You seem like a total yummy package.”

He cocked his head and regarded her. “Thanks, Beck. You are, too. It sucks when you’re getting to know someone, you think it’s going well, and then their eye is caught by your dazzling brother, like you were the appetizer and he’s the main course. I want to be a lifetime of meals for someone.”

The look he gave her this time seemed cautious and uncertain. “And to tell you the truth, I’m kind of getting my confidence back after one run-in in particular with my brother in which he and a buddy took off with the girl I was dating. I ended up getting in an accident, totaling my pickup, and I have no idea how I managed to get out of it alive. There’s more to the story, but…” He shrugged.

“Oh! That sounds horrid.”

“It was. It was a year ago. I’d left the party lifestyle behind that I shared with Savage, was trying to change and…” He shrugged. “Me and a tree and brother makes three,” he said.

She sensed a wall going up inside him. Not wanting to lose the connection they’d begun to forge, she tried to change the subject. “How long will your remodel take place?” she said in an abrupt about face.

“Of this place? I dunno. These things take as long as they take. Mine took a financing hit, stalling it for a while. But I never force art and design. The place is livable, so I’m not concerned. You haven’t seen the bedroom yet.” His gaze made her melt, like he reached inside and stirred her libido into caramelized sugar with a blowtorch.

Her attention drifted, landing on the locked door off the kitchen. “What’s in there? Spy stuff?”

He turned to see what she referred to, his eyes growing wary. “Oh, that. Now
that’s
top secret. That’s where my science stuff is stored.”

Fascinated, she asked, “What kind of science stuff?”

“It’s kind of a mini lab. Microscopes and things. I’m a geek at heart.” His eyes narrowed as he admitted this, indicating, what? Mistrust? Fearing rejection?

Beck responded enthusiastically. “Count me in with geekdom. I’m Queen Geek, reigning ruler on body systems.”

“Well, isn’t that a switch,” he said, as if to himself.

“What is?”

“The wonder of meeting you.” He gave her a warm smile. “And being well met.”

As he visibly relaxed, she went on. “When it comes to the human body and movement potential, I’m gaga with fascination. You should have seen me in my physiology class. My associate degree is in human systems—biology, kinesiology, and so on. Anyway, if the day’s lesson was the nervous system, I wanted to know
everything
there was to know about it, ion movement, action potentials, synapses and receptors, the central, peripheral and autonomic nervous systems…” She clamped her mouth shut. “Sorry. You get the idea.”

He chuckled, getting a large frying pan out of the cupboard. “I’m impressed. I’m the same way with plant life. And I’ll let you study my body in detail, any time. In case you need a test subject.” He bit his lip and regarded her through his long lashes.