Trent (Season Two: The Ninth Inning #4) (18 page)

“Get your shoes on then. It
might be too hot for a scarf though.”

She shrugs and scurries off
her bed, searching her messy room for a pair of shoes. We really
need to clean up in here. We just cleaned it last week and she’s
already made it a disaster. Keeping her room clean and tidy is
impossible. Something I don’t think I really noticed before Deborah
died.

Kaelyn talks the entire way
to Blake and Sofia’s house. She’s so excited about seeing Sofia and
that makes me feel better about asking Sofia to watch her. When we
arrive, Kaelyn screams, “HAPPY!” the moment Blake opens the door.
She rushes the close distance to hug him around the legs.

“Hey, kiddo,” he laughs.
“Sofia is in the kitchen with a fresh batch of brownies if you want
one.” Kaelyn runs around him for the kitchen.

“Could you give Sofia my
number and have her text me, so I’ll have hers? I’m hoping we’ll
both be done around the same time at least.”

“I will do that. Take your
time, Trent.”

I give him a small, grateful
smile. “Thank you. And thank Sofia for me.” He nods. “Bye, Kaelyn.
I love you,” I call out.

“Bye, Daddy! Love you!”

And with that, I turn to
leave. After stopping by the store for boxes for what I’m donating
and tubs for what I’m keeping, I return home. The silence engulfing
the house weighs on my shoulders. The closet seems daunting, so I
start with her clothes in the dresser. I slowly take each piece of
clothing, one at a time, and transfer it to the box, waiting for a
sign that it’s too soon.

Tears begin to fall
freely—with a mixture of guilt, grief, and a touch of comfort and
peace accompanying them. What I can’t donate and don’t want to
keep, I toss into a trash bag. Her jewelry box goes into a tub, so
one day Kaelyn can have it. Her shoes go into a box to be donated
and I work my way into the closet. I find myself conjuring memories
of when I saw her in a particular piece.

Once I finish in the closet,
I walk around the house to see if there’s anything else I’m ready
to let go of. I find a few things here and there. Finally, I’m
finished. I scan the room, that peacefulness coating me again as I
see the trash bags, tubs, and boxes. Rubbing my hands together, I
take a deep breath; about to begin transferring everything to my
car, I catch sight of my wedding ring.

Is it time to take this off
too? Removing it won’t change what I felt for Deborah. It won’t
taint my memories or the memory of her. Slowly, I slide the ring
off my finger, staring at it for the longest time. A few more tears
slip from the corners of my eyes. I find the tub with Deborah’s
jewelry box and slip it into a drawer. Then, I begin moving things
to my car. The tubs can be moved later.

Kaelyn is asleep with her
head in my lap. After her long day, she wanted to watch
Snow
White
before bedtime. However, she fell asleep within twenty
minutes. The movie has me thinking about Scarlett, so I pick up my
phone from the armrest and text her.

Me: Your plan for me to have
Kaelyn spend more time with women backfired.

In the few minutes it takes
for her to respond, I wonder if maybe it’s because she’s busy doing
something with someone. I put a halt to those thoughts as soon as I
have them.

Scarlett: How so?

Me: She was supposed to
spend the day with Sofia, going shopping and getting their nails
done. Once she saw Blake, apparently, she told Sofia she wanted to
stay with Blake instead. So, she spent the day with him.

Scarlett: Haha, she really
does love him. Next time, make sure Blake isn’t around. How come
she didn’t spend your day off with you?

I stare at the message, my
thumbs hovering over the touch screen keyboard for so long that
Scarlett sends another text.

Scarlett: Sorry, that’s not
really for me to know.

Me: No, it’s okay. I packed
up Deborah’s things today.

Scarlett: Oh, I’m sorry.
You’ve had a rough day then, huh?

Me: Yeah, but it ended well.
Kaelyn wanted to watch Snow White, but she fell asleep to leave me
to watch the rest by myself. Cinderella is still her favorite. Snow
White replaced Belle for second place though

Scarlett: Haha, that’s
awesome. Sounds like I’m a good influence on her haha

Me: Yeah. Well, I’m going to
go. Movie is boring me to death, and I’m going to put Kaelyn in
bed. See you around.

I can’t really be talking to
her on the day I got rid of Deborah’s things. That seems wrong.
Scarlett seems to always bring conflicting emotions out of me, and
I don’t want to deal with those today. It’s been a hard enough one
without that.

We’ve been meshing well this
season, have been playing better in areas we lacked last season,
and I think we’ll do well. Unfortunately, my mind is not here on
the field. It’s back home with my half-empty drawers and closet.
Yesterday, I felt peace. Today, I feel guilt and grief. Sometimes,
I just really hate life. My wife could be in the stands with our
daughter right now if it hadn’t been for Dominic Davis. Instead,
I’m having to battle to keep my emotions in check during a game
because I miss her.

I still feel like it was time
to pack up her things. Granny even gave me a small smile and
squeezed my hand when I let her know. I guess I wasn’t expecting to
be hit yet another way this makes it all final. I mean, I know
she’s gone and isn’t coming back, but taking away what presence she
did have has hit me hard today.

I’m at the plate, wishing I
were at home with my daughter instead. Deborah didn’t always watch
me play, but she loved to watch me bat more than anything. I never
understood why, but it was her favorite. Before games, she’d always
wish me luck on getting a home run because she loved to watch me
run the bases too.

The pitcher’s face is void of
expressions. He turns the ball over in his hand as I get into
position, enjoying the weight of the bat in my hands. I study him
while I wait. After he pitches, I swing the bat. As the ball soars
into the sky and I take off running, it feels like a blessing of
sorts when it turns out to be a home run. It’s as if Deborah is
patting me on the back and telling me I’m doing well here without
her. I’m doing the best I can and just need to keep moving
forward.

After that, I’m able to focus
on the game and I feel better about being able to handle the cards
I’ve been dealt.

***

I TAP MY pen on my desk
and try to concentrate on the paperwork in front of me. I’m
thinking about the messages from Trent last night. Why did he text
me? Did he want to tell me he had removed his wife’s things? I
can’t figure my life out right now. I assumed once I told Trent
about Dominic he would never come around. And now…what?

Are we friends?

Does he want more?

Is he doing this to torture
me?

Is this some mean plan of his
to hurt me?

I can’t blame him. I’m the
sister of the man who killed his wife. Having some plan might be
something he is working on. However, I don’t see Trent doing
something like that. Yes, he has every right to be mad at me, but I
don’t know what the hell is going on now.

I need to find out the
answers. I quickly bring up the Memphis Angels website and see they
are playing a home game tonight. I don’t know what to do for sure.
Do I go to the game or do I wait for him outside? I don’t know
where he lives so I can’t go there.

I need to check out the
stalking laws in Tennessee, because I’m sure I’ve broken them all.
I grab my keys, purse, and phone and race out the office door.

“I can’t let you through this
gate unless you have a pass. Do you have one?” The security guard
stares me down.

“No, I don’t have a pass,” I
tell him.

“Then you can’t come through.
I’m sorry.” He motions me to leave the area.

“Thanks.” I try not to snap
at him, but I want to see Trent. In about three seconds, I’m about
to lose my nerve, and the entire drive over here, where I gave
myself a lengthy pep talk, will have been worthless.

“Shit,” I mumble and pull out
my phone.

Me: Can we talk? Tonight?
I’m outside the West gate.

Trent: Sure. Give me a few
minutes.

I didn’t think he would
respond so quickly.

Me: I’m not parked. Can you
meet me at the Downtown Coffee House? Or do you need to go home
right away?

Trent: I can meet you
there.

I jump in my car and head
over. I stand in line, and I can feel my palms sweating thinking
that Trent will be here soon. When the cashier asks me what I want
to drink, I can barely remember my own name let alone what I drink,
but finally I get the order out.

It seems like forever, but
Trent finally walks through the door.

“Sorry to take you away from
Kaelyn. I promise I will only be a few minutes.” I push his drink
over to him.

“It’s okay. What’s going on?
Has Macy found something new on Junior Mints?”

I giggle out of nervousness
and not because it’s funny. “Of course you’d think that, but no,
she hasn’t said anything to me. I want to talk you about us. Or the
lack of us? Or the us you think we might or might not be?
Or...well...you know.” My ongoing nervous rambling begins.

“What about us, Scarlett?” He
furrows his brow.

“Okay, I’m just going to say
this and then you can either leave or not.” I take a deep breath.
“When you texted me the other day about you cleaning out the house,
I was confused. I don’t know where we stand with each other. Are we
friends? Are we just acquaintances that talk every once in awhile?
Am I someone who just gives you advice when you need it? Or are you
plotting something evil? I’m so confused, and I don’t like this
feeling. I just want to know what you’re feeling because I know I’m
a wreck, and I don’t know what to think anymore.” I finally shut my
mouth and attempt to regain my normal breathing.