Tristan's Redemption (18 page)

Abby opened her eyes, stretching her arms, and realized she was alone in the bed. Glancing around the enormous master suite, she didn’t see Tristan. She would just lie here a bit longer then get ready for her doctor’s appointment.

Two weeks had passed since the day she discovered that Tristan
’s wife was driving the car that killed David and, in spite of the shock value of that revelation, they’d grown closer. Tristan started going down to his office earlier, so he could get his work done at a reasonable hour and spend more time with Abby. They took lazy evening strolls through the trees on his property. He splayed his hand over her belly at night and laughed with her as the baby kicked. Their intimate relationship continued on a much more subdued level, with Tristan being respectful of her advanced pregnant state.

Twice, he had awakened during the middle of the night and sat up gasping. That would wake Abby and Tristan would settle back down as soon as he realized she was there, telling her both times he dreamed that she left.

Abby never doubted their love for one another. In fact, she knew that it only grew stronger. But she had a sense of foreboding. A feeling that something bad was going to happen. She couldn’t shake the nagging suspicion that it involved Tristan. Abby didn’t know if she would recover if she lost him.

He walked in the door and greeted her with a smile.
“You’re awake.”

“
Mmm hmm. Just lying here for a bit before I have to get ready for my appointment.”

He strode to the bed and kissed her. Abby loved the way his lips moved over hers and clutched his shoulders so she could keep him close. Tristan pulled back, laughing low.
“As much as I’m tempted to climb back in bed with you, there is breakfast waiting downstairs.” Abby groaned and Tristan smiled as he straightened. “Hey, none of that. I tore myself away from my desk so we could have breakfast together.”

Abby smirked at his amused grin, recognizing the sarcasm in his voice. She took his hand and st
ood as gracefully as possible. “Well then, I’ll shower and be down as soon as possible so you can get back to your work.”

Tristan
’s brow rose. “Need any help?”

She shook her head and shuffled to the closet.
“No, I can shower on my own.”

“
That’s a shame.” He came up behind her and kissed her on the neck. “I’m going on down. Don’t keep me waiting.”

“
I...I won’t.”

Tristan stilled.
“Abby, are you okay?”

“
Yes,” she insisted with a confidence she didn’t feel. “I’m fine. Go ahead. I’ll be down as quickly as I can.”

He watched her for a moment, as if he were doubtful that she really was okay. He left and Abby sat down on the edge of the bed. Her heart was pounding, her forehead covered with beads of sweat.

It all could be coincidence
, she told herself.
Nothing more than that.

But was it? Things had happened over the last few months that made Abby wonder if the pregnancy hormones had caused her to hallucinate, to hear things that weren
’t there.

Maybe I am just losing my mind.

Would that be preferable?

No. Abby knew there wasn’t anything wrong with her mind. She made a mental list of everything she’d noticed.

He
’d stayed until she pulled away from the pizza restaurant, even though her car was only a year old and in great condition. He’d been concerned about
her
, even though they’d just met.

Tristan
’s words the night she’d found out about his wife being the one who’d hit David.
I’m responsible for your greatest pain. Regardless of the circumstance, I’m directly connected to your loss.
Was he really referring to his wife’s drinking?

Tristan going to the farm to look for her, even though she hadn
’t told him where the farm was. Sure, the information was easily accessible to him, but somehow Abby didn’t think he’d taken the time to look for it. David had been well-aware that Abby went to the farm whenever she needed to clear her mind. He hadn’t mentioned going there and she wouldn’t have known if her mom hadn’t said anything. Why was he hiding that?

Alice
’s words as they walked through the peach trees. “Mr. Ramirez was a different person before he went on sabbatical, Abby. Having you in his life has changed him. He seems more human now.” How much had he changed? Was it possible that he actually
was
a different person before?

Tristan
’s words when he explained why he was working from home.
You make me happy. You’ve always made me happy.

David leaning in after
he said his vows, whispering, “Past then too. Death can’t take away what we have.”

Tristan
’s words as he got into bed, when he thought she was asleep. He wrapped his arms around her, held her closely and whispered, “I am so sorry.”

David, sitting on the edge of the bed as she walked out of the bathroom the first night of their honeymoon. He held out his hand, smiled at her like he had just won the lottery and cleared his throat before he spoke.
“I’ve waited my entire life for this moment, Mrs. Daniels. Don’t keep me waiting anymore.” The expression on David’s face was a near mirror image of Tristan’s a moment before.

Her instant fascination with Tristan, thinking about him and wanting to see him when they had just met. Could that have been fate pushing her toward someone she had already loved before?

Tristan calling her Abigail Marie as he slept.

Abby
’s chest tightened, her pulse pounding in her ears. Most of these similarities could be, as she thought earlier, coincidence, but all of them together?

Death can
’t take away what we have.

Her hands were shaking as
she tried to stand. Abby’s legs buckled and she went to her knees. She heard a sound and distantly registered her own sobbing wails. The door flew open.

“
Abby!” Tristan ran over, dropping to his knees beside her. “Abby, what’s wrong?”

She couldn
’t answer him, and rocked back and forth, her mind in utter chaos.

“
Are you in pain? Is it the baby?”

She managed to shake her head as Tristan lifted her.
“I’ve got you. I’m going to lay you down and call the— Oh my God. Abby, honey, I think your water just broke.”

Abby didn
’t know how it could happen, but somehow, David and Tristan were the same person.

~

Abby writhed, trying to breathe deeply through the pain, apparently oblivious to the mass of tubes hooked up to her body. Tristan, sitting sentry at her side, recognized an IV, fetal monitor, and a heart monitor for Abby. The very sight of all of the medical devices hooked up to her body made him feel nauseous. He felt utterly and damnably helpless.

He fed her ice chips, held her hand as the contractions came and prayed for her to speak. But Abby stayed silent, giving minimal answers to the nurses as they questioned, only nodding or shaking her head to his own questions. She said one word to him since they
’d come into the birthing room. He’d asked if she wanted him to leave and she’d whispered, “Stay”.

“
Is everything okay in here?” A nurse stuck her head in as she was in the middle of a contraction.

Abby squeezed his hand in a white-knuckled gr
ip, and he looked at the nurse. “No. She’s hurting. Can’t you give her anything?”

“
Abby declined the epidural, Mr. Ramirez and she’s dilated too far for one now.”

Abby groaned as the contraction finished and fell back against the pillow. Tristan wiped her sweaty brow with a damp cloth, and she closed her eyes.

The nurse snapped on a glove and wheeled a chair over. “I’m going to check and see how far you’re dilated now, okay?”

Abby nodded, breathing deeply as the nurse used her fingers to check the progress.
“Abby, it’s time. You’re at ten and I can see the top of the baby’s head.” She stuck her head out the door and asked for the doctor. “Are you ready to meet your baby?”

“
Yes.” She looked up at Tristan, the area under her eyes purple, her skin pale.

He wanted to make this all go away for her. She was so tired, had been in so much pain and
he couldn’t do a damned thing. “I love you.”

She smiled, ever so lightly.
“I love you too.”

The doctor came in and the nurses moved swiftly to set things up. Abby
’s legs were adjusted and the doctor settled into position. “Okay, Abby, with the next contraction, I want you to push.” Everyone looked at the monitor. “And we have one starting now. It’s time, Abby. Push!”

~

With every contraction, Abby wanted to beg the doctor for a C-section.

“
There’s nothing you can do for her pain?” Tristan’s voice was strained, the veins in his neck were bulging and he looked like a man with a threadbare grip on restraint.

“
Not at this point. But she’s doing great. It won’t be long now.”

Tristan attempted to smile but didn
’t do a very good job.

“
Oh God...” Another pain shot through her and Abby gripped Tristan’s hand.

“
...five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Good girl, Abby. We should get the head out with the next one.”

Abby sagged in relief. Tristan
’s lips brushed her ear as he whispered low. “My next project is going to be finding a way to make this a painless experience. As God as my witness, you will never have to go through this again.”

All during her labor, Abby hadn
’t talked. She couldn’t. Primarily because of the labor pain. If she had any idea the contractions would be this intense, she would have signed that consent form for the epidural. Secondly, she didn’t know what to say to Tristan.

Are you really my dead husband
would probably earn her a stay on the psychiatric ward.

She also couldn
’t face going through this without Tristan here. She loved him, and couldn’t deal with any of the
what ifs
right now. There was something much more important to concentrate on.

Her body tensed as the next contraction started.

“Hold on, Abby. I’ve got you.”

That got her through the next ten minutes.

~

Abby had pushed for thirty-seven minutes, and Tristan was about to pull his hair out. She was exhausted. Her face and chest were bright pink and drenched in sweat. Her hair was plastered to her head. Her fingers shook. But he
’d never seen anyone so beautiful. Tristan stayed by her head, kissing her between contractions.

“
You are so brave.” Tristan held her hand and cradled her head, placing kisses wherever he could. “I wish I could do this for you.”

The next contraction started, and she grunted. Her face contorted as the doctor gave the order to push.

“Stop, Abby, the head is out and I’ve got to get the cord. He’s tangled up a bit.”

“
Is he okay?” Abby breathed raggedly as she looked at the doctor.

“
You’ll see for yourself in a few moments. Okay, young lady, let’s get the rest of your son out. Give me one more push.”

Abby
’s groan was primal, wrenched from deep within her body, and Tristan felt her tremble with this last push.

“
He’s out, Abby. Congratulations, Mom!”

She sa
gged, a weary smile on her face. Tristan kissed her and together they watched the nurses handling the baby. As the baby’s first cry filled the air, tears streaked down Abby’s cheeks.

Tristan stood and walked toward the nurse.
My son. That is my son!

“
Apgars are eight and nine,” the nurse announced.

“
Is that good?” Tristan stood right by the nurse’s side, shadowing her every movement.

She smiled indulgently.
“It’s very good. Would you like to carry him over to Mom?”

Tristan
’s head whipped around and he looked to Abby for confirmation. She nodded, and he held out his arms. “I’d love to.”

The nurse placed the precious bundle in his arms
, and Tristan felt his own tears as he carried the baby. He cautiously kissed the baby’s forehead. “He looks so tiny. I don’t want to break him.”

~

Abby sat up, helped by the nurses. “You won’t break him.”

Tristan bent and handed the baby to her, and her breath caught as she looked at her son for the first time.

“He’s beautiful.” She knew that all mothers thought that, but this was different. The baby had plump cheeks, a full mouth and deep blue eyes. “Hi, I’m your mommy.” She knew babies were unable to focus, but it seemed as if her son was taking stock. Enjoying the warmth of being in his mother’s arms, when he’d only known the safety of the womb. Hearing her voice without the distortion of the amniotic fluid. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”