Trouble finding Blondie (39 page)

“Did he say something to you, Ashley?”

“No, but he talked to Brian a lot. He is ok to see them occasionally. He thinks you guys are the only ones making all the effort. Why are you trying so hard if it’s just a one way street?”

“I guess because I don’t have a family I want him to keep his. Especially for Francois.”

“Enough about depressing stuff. I’m pissed off I missed the striptease. I’m so mad at Stephan. He got me wet. I was changing upstairs,” Aurelie started venting.
 

“Who would have known our prude Aurelie has a wild, dirty side,” Radka was instigating.

“Those are the most naughty ones: the quiet ones.”
 

“Suzi, you may be onto something because the other quiet one, Laura, remembers every detail from the show,” Steffi knew Laura for years.

“Haha, I told you. I may be deceiving, but I see everything,” Laura couldn’t hide her mysterious smile.

“By the way, you were priceless.”

“Thanks, Radka. I was in my own zone. I only realized that it was shocking when I had to drag Jada out because nothing shocks her.”

“I have to admit I was in a state of shock. But it was a classic scene for a movie. Drop the dress, fuck you, kiss my ass.”

“Would you please tell this bitch I said, ‘Good night!’ She is driving me crazy with that.”

“I’m the lawyer here. Let me settle it for all of you, ladies. The words really are irrelevant Simona. It was fuck you, kiss my ass, with your middle finger up to the sky tone.”

All the women were laughing, nodding in agreement, and Jada finished the subject with a… “Thank you, Laura. Thank you, Jesus. Amen.”

“Jada, we need your famous toast.”

“Ok, ok. Ladies, get your glasses.

Here’s to the men that we love!
 

Here’s to the men that love us!
 

To the men that we love that don’t love us...

Fuck them all...., and HERE’S TO US!”

❖ ❖ ❖

The boys came back around three after a great lunch at the club only to find their women relaxed, sipping on sangria, lounging around, talking, and reading. They sat around for a few minutes except for Philippe who went to his room to shower. He didn’t want to be the odd man out amongst the couples. Brian was entertaining them with stories about being the referee in the tennis match and the heart wrenching battle between Andre and Philippe who had to play a third deciding set all the way to a tiebreaker.

“I think it’s time for a siesta,” Stephan said when Brian finished his story.
 

“Great idea,” Brian agreed. “Let’s all go.”

“Everyone,” Simona said as she was getting up from her lounge chair. “Dinner is back here at 7 PM. And we are going out dancing tonight.”

“Dancing two nights in a row?” David asked.

“I’m not sure what you are talking about, David, but I did not see your ass on the dance floor last night.”

“You only had eyes for Adam last night. You missed my sexy moves, Simona.”

“Fair enough. See you guys at seven.”

Simona and Andre were leaving and holding hands, and everyone was making jokes and comments, “It’s ok if you are late for dinner you know. Don’t worry about us.”

Before leaving, Simona checked with Monsieur Arnaud about the seating and the headcount for later on. She was trying to decipher a smile or maybe a small hint about last night, but he was the usual Swiss perfection all the way.

Andre couldn’t wait to be home to finally get his hands on Simona. He was driving on the country road like Nikki Lauda when Simona dropped the bomb about stopping to see the family.

He was trying to get out of it, but Simona argued that Elise had been there with Francois for hours, and that they needed to make sure they were all right.

“Twenty minutes. That’s all I’m willing to give,” Andre said.

“What is going to happen in 21 minutes? Are you going to explode?” Simona asked.
“Full on. I’m going to tell them that I’m horny because I took Viagra.”

“Stop it. You are awful. Scaring the kids and the elders.”

They arrived at the B&B. Everyone was by the pool on the patio.

“Hello, Zatopeks!” Andre exclaimed as soon as he saw them. “How is your day going?”

“Well, nice to see you. Hope you didn’t sleep all day,” Josef said.

“No, grandpa. We went to play tennis, and we just wanted to stop by and say hi.”

Francois and Mateas ran out and jumped on Andre. They got him all wet with hugs and kisses. Simona was protesting something about playing second fiddle.
 

“Mama, be happy. Papa got more wet,” Francois whispered.

“Okay then, thank you.”

They ran off as fast as they came. The girls were lying around catching rays and reading while the grownups were playing cards.

“Did you guys go anywhere?” Andre asked.

“Yes, we went to that castle Simona told us about,” Anton said. “We just got back a little while ago.”

“What is the plan for dinner?” Margaret came out of nowhere without any warning and somehow disrupted the harmony of the relaxed afternoon mood. Simona couldn’t help but smile, remembering the nickname of a hovering helicopter.

“Hello, Margaret. How was your day?”

“It was crazy hot. We were dragging all the kids up to that castle. It was quite a hike.”

“Let me rephrase the question for you,” Andre said. “What is the good news, Margaret?”

Everyone giggled, and Simona gave Andre stink eye.
 

“Well, we came to check on you guys. See if you had a good time last night, and how you are
 
doing now,” Simona said.

“Everyone had a great time, Simona. The party was wonderful, and today was a fantastic day. The kids had a blast, and we all feel like an easy evening.”

“Thank you, Monique. I’m glad.”

“So is anyone going to tell me the plan for dinner, or is it another secret?”

Simona was used to Margaret’s jabs. It didn’t unnerve her anymore unlike many of the others.

“My apologies, Margaret, you already asked that question,” Simona said. “Madame Cecilia offered to cater a dinner for you in collaboration with some organic local farmer chef. It should be amazing and fresh.”

“We are eating here?”

“Yes. We will have dinner with Andre’s friends tonight.”

“Oh. So we are not invited?”

“Well, considering that you guys are staying until Tuesday night, and tomorrow night is a big family dinner at our house, I thought Andre should have one dinner with his friends because most of them are leaving tomorrow due to their work schedules.”

“I think it’s a great idea. Adults only and English only,” Elise was trying to be funny and help Simona out of the conversation. That irritated Margaret even more, and she struck again.

“Of course I didn’t mean drag all the kids. I meant just us, English speaking.”

It wasn’t really clear if she was deliberately insulting Andre’s parents or Monique, but it was coming out all wrong, and Adam finally snapped.

“Are you going to say something, Anton?”

“Hmm? What do you mean?”

Adam was furious. Simona and Andre had no idea if it was built-up from the whole day or some other trigger, but he was ready to blow up.

“What do I mean? I mean are you ever going to use your high IQ to put your wife in her place so that it doesn’t have to be a task for all the people around you to teach her manners, tact, and control her mouth?”

“What do you mean? What’s your problem?” Anton got up from his chair.

“My problem? I don’t have a problem, but your wife does.”

“What’s my problem, Adam?” Margaret was equally shocked and furious.

“It will be too long of a speech.”

“Is it so wrong to ask why we are being excluded from fun?”

“I’m sorry, Margaret. It’s my fault,” Simona said. “I didn’t mean to make you feel excluded. I thought you guys would love to spend some time with the family, and give them the comfort of speaking Czech. Same as I thought Andre should have one evening dedicated to all these people that took their time and made the effort to be here for him. My apologies. You are welcome to come of course.”

“Are you crazy?” Adam asked incredulously. “You are going to apologize to someone who is your party crasher?”

“Adam, that’s not fair. She is family. She is not crashing anyone’s party. It’s just a quiet dinner at the chateau. That’s all.”

“I’m not fair? She gets a trip to Europe for free, stays in a magical place, goes to a privately catered party, and then has the balls to offend you when you tell her that she has another free dinner coming. Yes, one of us is crazy, but she is an ungrateful…”

“Adam! Not the place, and not the time. She is family. She may not have the best delivery, but she means well.”

“Are you sure about that?” Adam asked, but decided to stop there.

“Ok, let me take over here,” Andre finally stepped in. “You are all Simona’s guests. She invited all of you. She is extremely generous and kind. I draw the line on people who don’t appreciate her, me, or our generosity. You are my brother’s wife: you get to be forgiven. But this is your one free pass, Margaret. And no, you are not invited to the chateau tonight because I’m spending time with my dear friends. If you don’t like your dinner arrangements, please take your family and go somewhere else. My parents, Danielle, my son, and Adam’s family are going to dine here tonight. If you decide to join them, I suggest you bring your best mood to the table, please. Otherwise, my father who is the eldest here has every right and my blessing to ask you to leave. I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable, only clarifying our expectations of you.”

Andre was talking to a completely silent audience, except the kids splashing in the background. “I’m taking Simona home to relax and to make love to her. Mom, if you would like to come home
 
to shower and change, Adam will bring you at 6 PM, and we will drive you back. I believe that covers it all. Enjoy your afternoon.”

Andre grabbed Simona the same way Simona grabbed Jada the night before and took off before anyone could say anything back.

❖ ❖ ❖

Simona and Andre were resting, talking outside on their favorite oversized lounger with canopy. He wasn’t kidding earlier. He took time and tortured Simona for the past two hours. It was like a boxing ring with many rounds; the clothes came off in the foyer for the first round, shower got round two, bedroom three, outside lounger, kitchen... That evening, Andre displayed the greatest self control and stamina. He was ready for seconds, desert, and when he started kissing Simona on her neck again, opening her robe, she was inquiring if he really had taken that Viagra.
“Woman, you are kidding me, right? You don’t know that you have a stallion at home?”

“Haha. Stallions take yohimbine,” Simona was laughing out loud.

The door bell rang, and Andre was forced to get up. “Saved by the bell.”

“Who? Me or you?”

“I will show you when I come back.”

It was Anton and Elise. Andre was taken aback for a second, not expecting his older brother on the doorstep.

“Mom, you don’t have a key?”

“I do, but I was afraid to catch you in action,” she smiled at her son.

“Well, you just missed it. Anton, wanna have a glass of wine with us?”

“Sure,” Anton nodded with an uncertain smile.

“Well, it’s either yes please or no thank you,” Andre said.

“Dude, are you my mother?”

“No, but I am,” Elise said, “and apparently I didn’t teach you well. Or perhaps manners are not big in your family now.” Elise smiled a verbal slap at Anton and walked off to greet Simona. Andre couldn’t help but laugh. Hanging out with Simona, Elise was becoming feistier every day.

“Dude, I’m getting ran over and over,” Anton complained.

“Oh, poor you. Come on in then.”

Simona stood up to hug Anton; she kissed him on both cheeks. She was still in her happy go lucky mood with a radiant smile full of happy hormones.

“I guess he wasn’t kidding. You look…hmm… you have satisfaction written all over your face.”

“That’s called ooozing sex,” Simona confessed.

“What? I have never heard that.”
“I was told that by a guy with a hotdog cart on the streets of Manhattan.”

Andre walked in with a fresh glass of wine for Anton, and Simona turned around to go get ready.

“Wait, Simona. I wanted to apologize to you...”

“To me? What for?”

“Everything. I want you to know that we do appreciate all your generosity, and we don’t take it for granted even when my wife occasionally says something stupid.”

“We are all responsible for our own actions, Anton. You are not responsible for what your wife says. You are kind of guilty of what your brother was talking about, but that’s a matter you should take up with him.”

“The part of me being too passive?”