True To You (Taking Chances #2) (13 page)

Placing one hand over her heart, Mrs. Koo pleaded, “Promise me you will spend some time together, for this old woman’s sake. Promise me.”

Ming flashed his signature dimpled grin, the one he reserved for magazine covers and billboards. “That would be my pleasure. How about it, Ah-May? For old times’ sake.”

The familiar way her childhood nickname rolled off his tongue made her feel fifteen again. How she wished she could turn back time to when things had been so innocent and simple. Before she lost Ming and before she met Ben…

“What I hear you saying is that life has become more complicated ever since we started dating.”

Ben’s voice pulled her back to the present. The kitchen had quieted down by now with only one worker left mopping the floor. The pungent smell of cleaning agents stung Melanie’s eyes, reminding her of an important fact. A small amount of bleach had the power to alter a whole gallon of water, just as one incident could change everything.

“Because
I
make your life complicated,” Ben conceded.

Her gaze met Ben’s. His hazel eyes, normally bright and hopeful, were clouded by sadness. “That’s not… that’s not what I mean.”

“Melanie, you can be honest with me. I don’t need you to sugarcoat the truth because you’re afraid of upsetting me. I mean, come on, if you were still engaged to Melvin or if you were back together with Ming, you wouldn’t have the same kind of problems. Neither one of them would have landed your mother in the ER. We both know that’s true.” He sighed before continuing, “But you’re not dating them or a guy like them. You’re dating a white guy who teaches math. That’s who I am.”

“I know that,” she asserted, her voice quivering with emotion. “I don’t expect you to change.”

“Well, there are some things about myself,” he reckoned, “that I could never change if I wanted to. But I’m okay with who God made me to be, even if that makes our relationship complicated. The question is, are you? Do you want to be with me despite all the complications?” He waited expectantly for an answer that would quiet his pounding heart.

“I-I want to be. It’s just complicated-”

“Ah-May, are you ready to go?” Ming and his confident grin appeared in the doorway. He spotted Ben in an apron and called out, “Bob, I didn’t know you work in kitchen.”

“It’s Ben. And I was just leaving.” Noting the hesitation on Melanie’s face, he offered her a way out with his own exit. “Never mind. I think I understand.” He removed his apron and placed it on the counter, then picked up his bike helmet. “Goodbye, Melanie.”

She watched him walk out the door and felt her skin grow cold. If their relationship had been hooked up to a heart monitor, Ben’s departure had just caused it to flatline.

NINE

“Why are you going to Vegas?”

Melanie looked up from the open suitcase on her bed to see her sister glaring at her from the doorway. The way Sam stood with her arms crossed reminded her of herself whenever she went into “big sister” mode. Except this time, the roles were reversed. Her impulsive and headstrong sister was the one questioning her decision.

If that wasn’t a clue she was making a bad move, she didn’t know what was.

“The whole family is going and I already got the vacation days,” she replied as she sat down on the bed. “Why shouldn’t I go, too?”

“Maybe because you’re tired from being on call this week?”

“I’m okay. I’ve been sleeping during the day.”

“I know. That’s why I’ve barely seen you since Christmas.”

“Well, you’ll be seeing a lot of me for the next three days. Especially since we’ll be sharing a hotel room.”

“But what about hanging out with Ben?”

The mention of Ben’s name caused an awful squeezing sensation in Melanie’s chest. She rubbed the area over her heart, silently cursing the stress hormones at work in her body. Sensing Sam’s curious eyes watching her, she insisted, “I think I am kind of tired from working the graveyard shift.”

“You looked okay just a second ago,” she countered with an arched eyebrow. “What’s going on?”

“You know how stressful this week has been,” she stated as she massaged her throbbing temples. “Thank God Ma’s heart is okay. Ba’s been so worried about her; he’s even quieter than usual. I think this vacation will be good for both of them. They’ve worked non-stop for years. It’s time they did something fun.”

“But what about you? Wouldn’t you rather spend your time off with your hot teacher boyfriend instead of with Ma and Ba?”

Dropping her gaze, Melanie disclosed the news that had been weighing on her heart. “Ben and I are taking a break.” To be specific, she had not been answering his texts or calls since Christmas. Although she missed hearing his voice, she didn’t know what to say to him. Instead, she had thrown herself into her work, thankful her on-call schedule made it hard to reach her that week. Before Sam could start grilling her, she rushed on, “Considering everything that’s happened, it’s for the best.”

“For the best?” Sam crossed the room and faced her sister. “For whose best?”

“For everyone involved, especially for Ma.” Tugging the edges of her heather grey cardigan around her body, Melanie wrapped herself up in a cotton cocoon. “She can’t risk facing any more stress. Her heart won’t be able to handle it.”

“Oh, please, she’s fine,” Sam insisted. “She’s already back to her old matchmaking self. I heard her on the phone earlier with Melvin’s mother. It sounded like she’s now trying to marry
me
off to him. I don’t know what drugs they gave her at the hospital,” she said with one index finger moving in circles near her pink-streaked head, “but the side effects obviously haven’t worn off yet.”

Despite her melancholy mood, Melanie bit back a laugh. Leave it to Sam to turn their mother’s scheming into a joke. How she wished she could do the same. Why did she always have to take things so seriously? Oh yes, because she was the eldest daughter. And with that title came great responsibilities.

If only she didn’t feel so powerless.

Although Ben’s last text a few days ago implied otherwise:
You need to make your own decisions in life. No one else can make them for you.
She couldn’t help but think about how the choices she had made concerning her love life had backfired one too many times.

If only she could view matters of the heart like how she viewed work. She had no trouble making decisions at the hospital. Medical scenarios were black and white; she did what she needed to do to help a patient. It was a matter of going down a checklist; if one method didn’t work, she tried something else. But when it came to love, there were no clear-cut answers. And no guarantees.

“You do realize you’re walking into a trap Ma set up?” Sam continued. “She got Ming to invite us all to watch his show so you guys can get back together. Why else would she agree to close the restaurant while we’re gone? That’s a lot of
monnaie
that she’s willing to lose to find you a Chinese husband.”

“Your accent is getting better,” Melanie mentioned in an attempt to change the subject. “I’m kind of impressed.”

“It’s all thanks to Ben. He showed me the YouTube channel he’s been using to learn Cantonese. They have tons of videos for French, too.”

A picture of sandy brown hair and dimples crossed her mind. She missed Ben and his warm smiles so much. Her heart ached to know she had hurt him. He was right. She hadn’t fully accepted him. But so much stood in the way of her being able to do so. Their cultural backgrounds. Her mother. And one unexpected obstacle.

Her first love.

Ming’s presence in her life again had caused a bigger impact on her than she had anticipated. He had been her first for so many things, as well as everything she thought she had wanted. There was a part of her that had always wondered
what if
? What if she hadn’t left Hong Kong? What if he had come to be with her in America? How would her life be different now? Perhaps his return offered her a chance to find out these answers.

“I made a promise to Ma that I would spend time with Ming,” she admitted, knowing full well how her sister would respond. “That’s why I’m going to Vegas.”

“Are you out of your mind? Why would you do that?”

“Because she was lying in a hospital bed when she asked me. Because I felt guilty,” she reasoned. “I was the one who brought Ben to dinner even though I knew she wouldn’t approve of him. My decision played a big part in her heart attack.”

“
Near
heart attack,” Sam corrected, sarcasm dripping from every word. “I’ve got to hand it to Ma. She really got to you this time. This has to be her best guilt trip by far.”

“She didn’t have a near heart attack on purpose, Sam. She was in real pain.”

“That,” she sighed, “is one of your best and worst traits,
Ga Je
.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re so dutiful, like a golden retriever puppy. You think the best of everyone. You’re always willing to give of yourself to make other people happy. That’s why you couldn’t see Ming for who he really was, a two-timing, arrogant jerk.” Her purple lined eyes narrowed as she marveled, “You still can’t see it, can you?”

“I wouldn’t fall for a jerk!” Melanie scoffed, her cheeks flushed in indignation. Her shoulders slouched as she choked out her next words, “I certainly wouldn’t have given myself up for one.”

“What are you talking about?”

Melanie pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged her legs. “When I went back to Hong Kong for Ming’s twenty-first birthday, I…”

“You what?”

“We…,” Melanie’s swallowed the truth that she had kept hidden for years.

Understanding registered in Sam’s eyes. “You slept with him,” she finished. “Oh, wow. Now it makes sense why you had such a hard time letting go.”

Melanie averted her gaze, unable to look her sister in the eyes. “It was my first time. I had had a little too much to drink at the party. He came back with me to my hotel room, and one thing led to another…,” Melanie’s voice cracked like broken glass falling from a shattered dream. “I thought things would change after that night. But I came back to America and he didn’t even call or write. I spent the next month worried I was pregnant-”

“What? You guys-he didn’t use protection? What kind of irresponsible-”

Shaking her head, Melanie conceded, “It was as much my fault as Ming’s. I knew the consequences. I just wish I knew how much it would wreck me afterwards. I felt like I lost so much of myself, and for what? A happily ever after? That’s why I gave up on finding love. It wasn’t worth the pain.”

Sam sat down next to her sister, her eyes moist and regretful. “I wish I had known about this. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Meeting her sister’s eyes, Melanie gave a bittersweet smile. “You were only fifteen. I couldn’t dump this on you. I’m supposed to be the older sister who doesn’t make mistakes. You and Billie look up to me to set an example. Ma and Ba expected me to graduate with honors and go to med school. Do you know how much I wanted to tell someone, even them? But it would have killed them to know I had almost thrown away my future with one stupid decision.”

“
Ga Je
, even though you’re the oldest, it doesn’t mean you have to do everything right. It’s okay that you’re not perfect. No one is,” Sam reassured her. “I like the fact that you’re not. It makes you seem human. And it makes me feel better about myself.”

“Why wouldn’t you feel good about yourself? You’re so artistic and brave. You do things I would never do.”

“Exactly. That’s why we all know you’re Ma’s favorite.”

“No, what I mean is that I admire you. I know I give you a hard time, Sam, but that’s because I wish I could be like you.”

“You want to be like me?”

“Yes. I wish I could do things because I wanted to do them, not because I felt obligated to. I wish I didn’t have to be so responsible all the time.”

“But that’s who you are. You’re the one person I can count on, no matter what. Even when I screw up-and you know I do a lot-I know you’ll be there for me.” A smile spread across Sam’s face. “And now that I know you’re not perfect, I won’t be as scared to tell you when I do mess up.”

“Sam, you can always talk to me,” Melanie assured her, “you know that, right? It doesn’t matter what you’ve done.”

“I know, I know.”

“I don’t mind being responsible if that means you can rely on me.”

“Just know that you can rely on me, too. I’m not fifteen anymore, and I’ve been through my share of relationship drama.”

“I know you have,” Melanie chuckled. “Thanks, Sam. I’m really thankful you’re my sister.” Pausing to gather some courage, she stammered, “I-I love you.” Despite the unfamiliarity of that phrase on her tongue, it felt oddly right. She smiled at her sister’s wide-eyed expression, amused to see her at a loss for words.

“Uh…”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to say it back. I just wanted to be sure
I
told you. Someone wise once told me it’s just as important to talk about love as it is to show it.”

“I’m guessing that someone doesn’t belong to our family,” Sam replied with a grin. “I know you… how you feel. Thanks for telling me though. I, uh, ditto back at you.”

“Hey guys,” Billie said as she poked her head through the partly open door, “Ba wants you to bring your luggage out. We’re going to the airport in an hour.” Noticing the thoughtful expressions on her sisters’ faces, she asked, “What’s going on? Did I miss something?”

“Come here,” Mel called out. As Billie neared the bed, she stood up and reached out to put her arm around her tallest sister. “You know I’m proud of you, don’t you?”

“I, um… is this about my math final?”

“Kind of. I admire how hard you studied for that test and didn’t give up. And I really admire how well you play basketball. You’ve proven that Asian girls can dunk. But besides all that, I just love you for who you are.”

Billie blinked quickly as her sister’s words sank in. “Whoa, uh, thanks,
Ga Je
,” she sniffed. “No one’s ever said those things to me before. I didn’t know it would feel so good to hear it.”

“I’m sorry it took me so long. But I’m going to be saying the “L word” a lot more often from now on. You two are the best sisters I could ask for.”