Authors: Cambria Hebert
Talie
Some jerk down the beach was teasing me with the scent of grilling meat. I mean
, really. If it wasn’t bad enough, I almost caught myself on fire, had amazing sex with a guy who confused the hell out of me and then left, but now I had to be out here on this filthy deck, scrubbing up baking soda and whatever the hell the stuff was from inside an extinguisher.
I was pretty sure I owed Aunt Ruth a new grill. This one was toast. Literally.
Maybe once I was done, I would drive into Surf City to Island Delights and get a giant chocolate malt and a burger that I didn’t have to cook. “How was I supposed to know the interior of the grill would fill up with propane and then explode?” I muttered to myself.
Well
, I sure as hell knew now.
As I cleaned
, I kept my back turned to Gavin’s place. I didn’t need a reminder of our all-sex-nothing-else relationship. The satisfied ache between my legs was reminder enough. What did he mean by
I won’t be around to watch
? He acted like I had some kind of death wish. It was an accident.
“All I wanted was a stupid hamburger
,” I muttered.
“Here,” a deep voice said from close by.
My head snapped up as Gavin came strutting across the deck, wearing a pair of navy-blue gym shorts and carrying a white paper plate. I stood up, brushing off my hands and glancing down at my soot-streaked dress.
“What’s this?”
“I was grilling out and figured I’d bring you a burger since, you know, you murdered that poor grill.” The affection in his tone caught me off guard.
I took the plate and looked down at the perfectly grilled patty on a fluffy sesame seed bun. “Thank you.”
“I got some sweet tea at my place if you’re interested,” he said, and I caught the flash of vulnerability in his eyes just before he turned and walked away.
I followed along behind him, so intrigued. Gavin was definitely a guy who kept his cards against his chest
, and this was the first time he’d ever offered to spend any time with me beyond getting naked.
On his deck
, he poured us both large glasses of sweet iced tea and then picked up a plate with two loaded burgers on it and swung his leg up over a nearby deck chair. I stood there holding a red solo cup and a paper plate, watching him, wondering what to do next.
He didn’t look over when he patted the seat beside him, but kept his eyes trained out to sea.
I sat down and placed my cup on the armrest and plate in my lap. I didn’t realize how tired I was until I sat down. Too much sun followed by too much excitement turned me into an exhausted lady.
I watched the waves for long moments, staring off into the horizon and sipping the insanely sweet tea Gavin gave me. When I finally bit into the burger
, I sighed in appreciation. It was so good.
Out of the corner of my eye
, I saw him smile and then shove the remaining hunk of the first burger into his mouth.
“
So how long have you lived here?” I asked around another bite.
The cup paused halfway to his lips. A muscle ticked in the side of his jaw.
“Almost two years.”
“Do you like it?” Was it just me or did the air around us turn a little bit cold? I kn
ew he said he was a private man, but my question seemed innocent enough.
“I like the beach,” he said, offering no other information.
Okay, so talking about him clearly was off-limits. Was I supposed to sit here and say nothing at all? If so, why did he invite me over?
Maybe if I told him how much of a wreck my life was
, he wouldn’t feel like his was so bad it had to be kept secret.
“So before I came here
, I got fired from my job,” I blurted.
He shook his head. “
Did you set the place on fire?” He joked.
“I wouldn’t sleep with my boss.” I picked a couple seeds off the top of my burger while I spoke.
He made a choking sound and for the first time since I got here, he looked at me. His intense eyes met mine. “Are you serious?”
I nodded. “Well, sort of.” I began. “I’m trained in medical billing and coding. I worked for a doctor and when he took over the practice
, he hired all new staff but me. All the girls were gorgeous, well-endowed, and all too willing to
work
after hours.”
“And you wouldn’t
,” he said, his voice flat.
“No. So when one of the regulars at the practice came in and made a big stink over her bill
, he took that as his opportunity to fire me for not being a team player.”
“Fuck him.”
“I think if I had, I would still have a job,” I quipped.
He barked a laugh.
“Doctor’s are egomaniacs,” I said. “They think everyone should treat them like a god.”
“They’re just people like everyone else.”
“Exactly.” I agreed.
“So you got fired and came here?”
“Something like that.” I wasn’t about to tell him all of my business.
A few minutes of silence passed between us. “Do you have a job?”
“I used to,” he replied, sitting back and propping his feet up on the railing of the deck.
It was really hard to have a conversation with someone who didn’t want to participate.
“How long are you here for?” he asked.
“I was supposed to go home tomorrow
, but I extended it for another week or so.”
“Another week, huh?”
“Don’t worry. I won’t catch anything else on fire.” I joked.
His smile flashed. He didn’t smile very often or for very long, but I lived for those brief moments of happiness that visited his strong, unshaven jaw.
“Maybe we can hang out. You can teach me how to surf?” I suggested.
“No
,” he said roughly, keeping his gaze away from mine. “I don’t make good company.”
He wasn’t lying about that. Even still, his rejection stung. All the times Blake told me no one else
would want me replayed in the back of my mind like a bad song.
“Right.” I stood from the chair and tossed my cup and plate into a nearby trash bag. “Well, thanks for the burger. And for coming over with an extinguisher. I’m going to have to buy one for Aunt Ruth before I leave.”
He made a sound and didn’t glance away from the view. The tension between my shoulder blades didn’t ease until I stepped onto my own deck. I wasn’t sure what just happened, but I did know it twisted up my stomach into uncomfortable knots. I decided right then and there that no matter how much longer I was on this island, I was going to do everything I could to stay the hell away from Gavin.
Talie
When you go to the beach, step onto the sand
, and glance out over the vast expanse of sea, you think to yourself that nothing in the world is bigger. That nothing in the world can make you feel as small as you do in that moment.
And then the sun goes down.
The stars light up the onyx sky and glitter like the most flawless collection of diamonds ever found. Curled up in a blanket, sitting under that kind of sky while hearing nothing but the waves crashing against the darkened, empty shoreline…
That is when a person feels smallest.
And most at peace.
I gazed
up at the never-ending sky as the wind off the water carried away my inner turmoil and brought a certain stillness within myself. A certain kind of truce. As if my broken heart and troubled thoughts declared for at least tonight they would let me be.
The wind was chilly, but I wasn’t ready to go inside, so I pulled the chenille blanket around me just a little bit closer.
My sunburn made me feel colder than I actually was. Tomorrow I was going to have to stay out of the sun and at the very least wear a shirt to cover the worst of it. Maybe I would go grocery shopping and rent a couple movies, make it a day in.
And of course my decision to stay inside had nothing to do with avoiding Gavin.
It was because of my sunburn.
Uh-huh.
I had enough guy problems to wallow in without adding his still-stinging rejection to the list.
Maybe staying here wasn’t the best decision. Maybe I should pack up and go home, face my future head on and deal with my past.
And Blake was definitely in my past.
I was sorry that Claire had to bear the brunt of his anger, although from the sounds of it, he didn’t show his slimy side to many. I was glad for it
. Not to save my reputation, but just because my family didn’t need to be subjected to my poor choice.
I was hiding. Delaying the inevitable. Who cared if Blake was pissed and would pitch a fit when I re
fused to come home? Who cared if Joanna would invite me to lunch and sit silently (and not so silently) judging me?
Suddenly, I felt so incredibly weary. Tired of trying to be who everyone else wanted to be. Trying to tell myself that if I just tried a little harder
, my life would fall into place.
Movement off to the side caught my attention
, and I sat up, turning in the direction of the stairs. A figure moved out of the darkness toward me. His blond hair was covered beneath a baseball hat and he was actually wearing a shirt, a white one that seemed to glow against the backdrop of night.
“Hey,” he said, stepping closer.
“Hey,” I replied, not sure what else to say. I was surprised to see him. I thought he wasn’t good company.
“Can I sit?”
He gestured toward the chair beside me.
“Sure.”
He lowered himself in the chair, sitting forward with his elbows resting on his knees. I sat back, feeling like he obviously came here to say something so I would wait for him to say it.
“I’m an ass
,” he said, turning slightly so his words could be heard over the gusting wind.
“Ya think?”
I saw the flash of his white teeth. “I deserved that.”
I certainly wasn’t going to deny it. His moody, sexy behavior probably needed some kind of medication.
Gavin expelled a heavy sigh and then stood abruptly. He placed his hands on his hips and stared out into the darkness, keeping his back turned to me.
“I’m not available
,” he said.
Panic bloomed in my chest and a sick feeling spread throughout my body. “You said you lived alone.”
Did he have a girlfriend? A wife? Was she maybe out of town? Had I done to some other woman what was just done to me? The thought made me physically ill. I knew how it felt to have someone you loved and trusted take advantage of you, to make you feel like you weren’t enough. I couldn’t do that to someone else. I couldn’t.
“I do
,” he replied, swinging around to look at me.
I glanced up, the hammering of my heart making his words harder to hear.
He cocked his head to the side and looked at me. “I’m not involved with anyone.”
“Oh
…” I blew out a breath and the sick feeling began to ease. “Being the other woman is not on my lifelong to-do list.”
“Yeah
, and being a cheating, lying dickhead isn’t on mine.”
I guess that meant he was against cheating.
“Then…?” I asked, letting the question dangle in the breeze.
He leaned back against the railing and looked at me. “I’m not available emotionally. I live here for solitude,
to be alone. I don’t have room in my life for someone. I can’t hang out. I can’t talk about my life. I just… I can’t.”
The veiled pain behind his words caused my heart to constrict. What happened to him?
“But you can have sex?” I said. Gavin might have had a rough time, but he wasn’t the only one. And he wasn’t getting off the hook that easily.
“I’m a guy
,” he said, as if that explained everything.
I guess it sort of did. He had urges, needs. Wasn’t it the same with me? Hadn’t I been starving for human contact, for a body
-ripping orgasm? I couldn’t judge him for something I was guilty of as well.
“I’m not available either,” I said. “Emotionally.”
He nodded like he already figured that out. “I shouldn’t have been a jerk to you.”
“It’s okay
,” I said, meaning it.
He studied me for long moments as a strong gust of wind came up off the sea. I shivered and tucked the blanket just a little bit closer. Gavin moved, crouching down in front of my chair, reaching out to grasp the ends of the blanket.
From this close, I could see the intensity of his eyes. I could see the vulnerability he felt from coming here… I also could see desire.
“I can’t offer you anything,” he whispered. “But I’m asking you for something.”
“What?” His closeness was driving me wild. Want burned through my veins as I studied the way the T-shirt stretched over his broad shoulders. Need eclipsed my thoughts as his hand tightened around the blanket and carefully drew me a little bit closer.
“
I want you. I want to spend the next week burying my dick inside your body. I want to hear those little sounds of pleasure that you make just before you surrender to orgasm. I want uninhibited access to you until you leave.”
My breath caught in my throat. He was totally propositioning me for sex.
“I won’t answer your questions about my life. I won’t ask you anything about yours. We aren’t going to date. Emotions will be left at the door. This is sex—raw, physical, real. I can’t give you anything, but I will promise you it will be good.”
My underwear dampened. Clearly, I wasn
’t offended by his no-strings-attached proposal. In fact, nothing sounded better. I didn’t need complications in my life, but sex with him would be nothing but pure pleasure.
We stared at each other for several moments. The heat from his hands soaked through my blanket and warmed my skin. When I moved
, he released me and sat back. I stood and let the blanket trail behind me as I went to the sliding doors on the house.
He watched me walk away without saying a word. Once I was inside, the glow of the nearby lamp spilling out across the deck floor
, I turned. Our eyes collided.
I opened the door as wide as it would go and then I stepped back, silently giving him my answer. Gavin pushed off the railing and prowled toward me across the deck with slow, unhurried steps.