Two Against the Odds (15 page)

“My mother wondered if you'd had a ceremony.” He lifted a chunk of dirt and grass and put it aside. “I wasn't sure.”

He dusted the dirt from his hands. For a long moment their gazes held.

“You're welcome to visit the jizo statue anytime,” Lexie said. She hesitated, not sure how far to push this. “It's your baby, too. Someday you might feel a need to…”

Rafe glanced away. He reached into the wheelbarrow and soon the only sound was the soft thunk of stone on concrete as he prepared the other pedestal. When he was done, he patch-worked small pieces of turf around the edges of the pavers to hide where the ground had been dug out.

Lexie went into the house for the other statue.

They were almost exactly the same. She glanced at Rafe, who stepped back a respectful distance, and set the statue in place on the pedestal facing the pond. Her hands folded at her heart, she murmured a silent
prayer for her first baby.
Forgive me, sweet one. Be at peace.

Rafe picked up the other statue and held it out to her. She placed her hands over his on the stone figurine. “You do it.”

He stood there so long, his dark eyes full of shadows, that she thought he was going to refuse. Then his mouth firmed and he accepted it from her. He placed it on the pedestal, taking a long time to make sure it was centered.

Then he stepped back and turned to her. She walked into his embrace and his arms folded around her, warm and solid and strong. They stood together with just the sound of the birds and the faint rattle of the gum leaves in the breeze. A long slender leaf fell and landed on the edge of one of the pedestals, making the two stone children look as if they'd been there for a long time.

“I—I'm sorry, Lexie.” His low voice broke. “Sorry I said I was relieved. I was wrong to say that. I didn't know— You were right. I need to grow up.”

“Shh, it's okay.”

It was late afternoon, the hour when everything was burnished with a golden light. Rafe stood by while Lexie spread the delicate flowers at the base of the statues. When it was done she whispered another quiet prayer. And turned to Rafe. “Thank you. I will never forget this. Or you.”

“Lexie.” He took her in his arms again and kissed
her. Tender, healing kisses pressed over her wet eyes and soft mouth. Lexie clung to him.

“Lexie,” he murmured. “We could try again.”

She longed to. But after today and seeing the tenderness he was capable of, she just couldn't.

“Rafe,” she said, agonized. “You might not think you want children but that could change in the future. Y-you deserve a younger woman, one who can give you healthy babies—”

“But I don't—” He broke off. She read his doubt.

“You see? Even you don't know what you'll want in the future. Five years from now you might like to have a family. By then I'll be too old.”

“But I would have you.”

“I'm not going to take options away from you,” she said around a lump in her throat. “Anyway, I—I don't love you. Remember?”

 

R
AFE KNOCKED
on Hetty's door. Lexie's rejection following the mizuko ceremony had wounded him more than he'd expected.

He almost didn't recognize the woman who opened the door. Hetty was wearing a pair of jeans and a multicolored blouse. This was the first time he'd seen her without her trademark tunic and flowing pants.

He handed her a bag containing a couple of snapper. “Thought you might like some fresh fish.”

“Why, thank you.” Hetty stepped back. “Come in.
Steve's over at Jack's workshop but he shouldn't be long.”

“It's you I wanted to talk to.” Rafe felt foolish but he figured he might as well just come out with it. “I need some advice. About Lexie.”

“I'll make a pot of tea. Come through to the kitchen.” Hetty led the way to a sunny room overlooking the backyard. A basket of washing waited by the door to be hung out on the clothesline.

“I'd prefer coffee, if it's not too much trouble,” Rafe said, taking a seat at the breakfast table.

“One coffee, coming right up.” She bustled around, filling the kettle, spooning ground coffee into a plunger.

“You're looking well,” he said. “Your hair's different, longer. It's nice.”

“Thanks.” She touched her silvery-gray hair that now had a slight curl at the ends. “I got tired of the spiky look.”

Rafe sipped his coffee. “How are you and Steve?”

“We're getting there,” Hetty said. “I'm going to Toastmasters and Steve is trying yoga. Lexie's idea. She insisted. I don't know if it'll work but we're making the effort, at least.”

She picked up the laundry basket. “Would you mind coming outside while I hang this up? I want to get it dry before dark.”

“Sure. I'll give you a hand.” He followed past some garden furniture arranged on the deck and down the
steps to a narrow concrete path to the rotary clothesline in the middle of the yard. On the sunny side of the yard was a vegetable patch, the summer crop over and the earth turned for autumn planting.

Hetty put the basket on the ground and bent to pick up a handful of socks. “Lexie told me about the jizo statues. That was a lovely gesture. It meant so much to her.”

Rafe sipped his coffee and handed her clothes pegs from the bucket attached to the central post. “She pushed me away afterward, saying that I should find a younger woman. I used to be certain I didn't want kids. I still don't feel ready but maybe someday…”

“Timing is important in life. To marry, to have children.” Hetty pinned up one of Steve's plaid shirts. “Lexie is running out of time. If you want to be with her, you'd have to make a decision soon and stick with it.”

“I'd do just about anything to make her happy. I'd like us to at least have the chance to know each other better. To see if we could be a couple.”

Hetty grabbed a pair of trousers from the basket and shook them out. “She said you asked her to marry you and she said no.”

“She told me she didn't love me. I guess I should just get it through my head that she doesn't want me but—”

“But what?”

Rafe watched a magpie pull up a worm from the grass. “I don't believe her.”

“Be patient with her. She's still grieving.” Hetty pinned the trousers to the line, then paused. “Do
you love her?
”

“That's what I want to find out,” Rafe said. “I can't do it unless we spend time together.”

Hetty bent for another shirt and smiled at him. “Remember the advice you gave me? Don't give up and don't go away.”

“You want me to stalk her?” he asked doubtfully.

“No!” She swung the clothesline around to a free space. “Obviously I don't mean for you to do anything creepy. Prove that you want to be with her by simply being available. Be a friend to her. Don't get scared and run off. A wise young man once told me that it takes time to build trust.”

“I would need to be nearby,” Rafe said, his mind ticking over the possibilities. “I was already planning to move my boat farther down the bay.”

“Mornington has a nice marina,” Hetty commented. “And it isn't far from Summerside.”

“That's true.” He drained his coffee, eager to put a new plan into action. “I'd better get going. Thanks.”

Hetty left the laundry and walked him to the door. “Good luck. I hope we see you again soon.”

“I hope so, too.” Rafe paused on the doorstep. “What would a guy wear to yoga class?”

Hetty smiled. “Steve just wears a T-shirt and shorts.”

R
AFE STOOD
outside Lexie's front door, Murphy at his feet. He probably should have called before coming over but it would be harder for her to tell him to go away in person.

“I'm not asking for a lot,” he said to Murphy. “Just a bit of her time.” The dog tilted his head and whined.

Rafe took a deep breath and knocked.

Lexie opened the door wearing jeans and a blue T-shirt that brought out the color of her eyes. “Rafe!”

“You said once you'd teach me yoga.” He held up his brand-new rolled-up mat.

“
Now?
I—I would but…” She glanced down at his gray shorts and bare feet in flip-flops. Then over his shoulder at the road. “Sally's dropping Chloe off for me to babysit any minute.”

“Oh.”

“Come in. We can do a couple moves before they get here.” She glanced over her shoulder. “It
is
just yoga.”

“Yes.” He drank in her eyes, her mouth, her perfume.

For now.

“Okay, well…” She glanced around, clearly flustered. “You move the furniture out of the way while I go get changed.” She went off down the hall.

Rafe pushed the coffee table against the couch and pulled the chintz-covered armchair to the opposite wall. He unrolled his yoga mat. Murphy came over to inspect it and he nudged him away. “This isn't for you, buddy. Go lie down.”

Lexie came back in a clinging tank top and stretchy close-fitting pants. She blushed as he took her in.

She unrolled her mat a few feet away from his.

“We'll start with Sun Salutation. Hands together in front.”

Feeling foolish, Rafe followed her lead and pressed his palms as if in prayer.

“Breathe in and raise your arms above your head,” Lexie instructed. “On the exhale fold forward, chest resting on thighs, hands on the floor.”

Hands on the floor? Was she kidding? Rafe's knuckles dangled just below his knees. Clearly his weekly basketball games weren't doing much for his flexibility.

“Now bring your right leg back in a lunge, chest up, hips down,” Lexie went on. “No, hips
down.
”

“They are down,” Rafe grunted over the sound of his left knee cracking.

Lexie got up and came around to his side. Her small hands gripped his hips and gently pressed.

He felt a tightening of his groin from her touch.…

“Don't stiffen up,” she said. “Ease into it. Chest up.” Now her hands were on his shoulders, pulling them back. Her long hair brushed his bare arms and he breathed in her scent. It was torture to be so near her.

“Now put your left leg back beside your right, and bring your body forward over your hands, keeping straight and rigid like a plank.”

Finally, something he could do. This was like a pushup.

Lexie moved in front of him and got down on the floor in the same position but facing him. Allowing him a clear view of her cleavage.

“Lower yourself to the ground slowly,” she said. “Touching down with your chin, chest, knees.”

“This doesn't feel relaxing,” Rafe muttered.

“Now lay your whole body down. Lift your head and arch your back, looking up at the ceiling. This is Cobra pose. Great for those knotted neck and back muscles.” He'd just gotten used to that when she said, “Now to Downward Dog. Up on your hands and feet. Push your butt high in the air, legs and arms straight in an A shape.”

Rafe peered through his hair to figure out what she meant. Her tight round butt encased in blue spandex was outlined against the cream-colored wall. Her blond hair hung between her arms.

He hoisted himself into the position. And a pretty undignified position it was, too.

The doorbell rang.

“That'll be Sally. I'll just be a second.” Lexie bounced to her feet. “Stay in Downward Dog. It's a fantastic hamstring stretch.”

Stay. Stay, boy.
But he had to admit, the stretch did feel good.

Then Murphy trotted over and started licking his face with big slurps. “Stop it, Murph. Good dog. Go away. Murph!”

“Hey, Andrew!” Lexie exclaimed. “Come in.”

Uh-oh. Who the heck was Andrew?

Between his legs he saw Lexie's shapely ankles and bare feet return to the living room followed by…a small pair of running shoes with the laces undone. Rafe tilted his head and his gaze shifted upward to a pair of skinny legs and two scabby knees.

Andrew was a little boy.

Rafe started to unfold.

“Don't move,” Lexie cried. “You need to finish the sequence.” She made him lunge his right leg for ward then bring his left in before rising and lifting
his arms above his head again. Then he had to pull them together at his
heart center.

And all the while he was being stared at by a pair of unblinking hazel eyes in a freckly face. It was unnerving.

“Namaste,”
Lexie said.

“Why is he in his underwear?” Andrew asked with a lisp.

“These are shorts, kid,” Rafe said. Anyone could tell the difference.

“They look like my dad's underwear.”

Lexie crouched to tie the boy's shoelaces. “We were doing yoga. You've seen me doing yoga before. This is Rafe. Rafe, this is Andrew who lives next door.”

“Can I get my ball?” Andrew said, reaching for Lexie's hand. “It went over the fence.”

“Of course you can. Come with me.” Lexie led him out through the kitchen. She glanced over her shoulder at Rafe. “I'll be right back.”

“Sure.” It was all he could do not to follow. Murphy, the traitor, trotted after Lexie and Andrew, tail wagging.

The doorbell rang again.

Rafe glanced out the window. Lexie and Andrew were searching the hydrangea bushes for his ball. He went to answer the door.

Sally stood there with Chloe on her hip. Her brown
hair was pulled into a disheveled ponytail. “Rafe, isn't it? Lexie's expecting me.”

“She's outside with the boy from next door. Come on in.” He stepped back. “I'll call her.”

“Oh, don't bother.” Sally glanced at her watch. “I'm already late. If it's okay with you, I'll just get Chloe set up and take off.” She spread a blanket on the floor and plunked the curly-headed tot in the middle of it. “Wait a minute. You're the one from the barbecue.”'

Rafe raised his hands. “I swear I won't touch a hair on her head. Your baby will be safe.”

“Okay.” She upended a tote bag of toys. “Tell Lexie I'll talk to her when I get back from my doctor's appointment. Bye-bye, pumpkin.” She blew kisses to Chloe. “I'll be back very soon.” And then she was running out the door.

Chloe looked at the door closing behind her mother. Her bottom lip wobbled. She grabbed a toy and tossed it down again. Then she raised her arms to Rafe. “Up.”

“You don't like me, remember?” Rafe said, with out moving.

She stretched her arms so enthusiastically her pink corduroy butt lifted off the ground.
“Up.”

Rafe went to the window. He tapped on it and mimed rocking a baby. Lexie nodded and held up a
finger. She and Andrew were still combing the bushes for the ball.

Rafe pushed a brightly colored plastic toy toward Chloe with his toe. “Here, play with this.”

She ignored it and continued to reach for him and grunt.

“Oh all right.” Rafe bent to pick her up. She was heavier than the last time he'd held her.

At least she wasn't crying this time. Her hazel eyes were enormous. Her hair had grown, too, into soft curls that framed her round face.

Chloe poked him in the cheek and gurgled, show ing off four tiny bottom teeth. Then she pulled off a bootie and dropped it.

“You lost your bootie,” Rafe said sarcastically.

She pointed at it and grunted.

“For crying out loud.” He bent at the knees, trying to keep Chloe upright, and laboriously retrieved the limp piece of knitting. He'd no sooner straightened and was trying to jam it back on her chubby foot than Chloe giggled and pulled off her other bootie. With a gleeful smile she held it out, her eyes on his, and dropped it deliberately.

The little minx.

“It would serve you right if I left that there for the dog to chew. Murphy, where are you?” He glanced around, pretending to look for the dog.

Lexie was in the doorway, watching him with a
smile on her face. “Andrew's throwing his ball for Murphy.” She nodded at Chloe. “She likes you.”

“She's a master at manipulation.” He walked over to Lexie and tried to hand Chloe over. The girl knotted her tiny fists in his shirt and clung.

“Quit jerking my chain.” Rafe gave Chloe a look, letting her know he was onto her. Gently, he pried her fingers loose from the fabric. She immediately curled them around his thumb, looking up at him with those big eyes. Something funny happened to his stomach. And it wasn't a twinge of pain. “Here, take her.”

“Look at the silly man,” Lexie crooned in a baby voice to Chloe. “Rafe's afraid of a little girl.”

Damn right he was. “Uh, maybe I'd better get going. You're busy with the kids.”

“You can stay if you want.”

“Nah.” He rolled his mat. “I've got things to do on the boat.” He met her gaze. “Another time?”

“Sure.” She walked him to the door. “Mum said you were thinking of moving your boat to Mornington.”

“I'm there now. Come down and visit. Anytime.”

Looking thoughtful, Lexie swayed Chloe in her arms then slowly closed the door.

 

L
EXIE PARKED
her car at the marina, grabbed her box of paints from the trunk and walked across to the
pier. Gulls circled the back of the seafood restaurant on stilts over the water. The stays on the sailboats in the harbor clanked gently. She walked down the long concrete pier, grateful for her sweater. The un-seasonably warm days had passed and autumn had arrived.

When she saw Rafe's sandwich board advertising his fishing charter rates, her heart beat faster. The boat was tied up broadside to the pier. Rafe was on the back deck, hosing out the big coolers. He was wearing a navy pullover and gumboots over his jeans. His thick black hair moved in the breeze.

Murphy poked his furry head out of the cabin and barked once then scampered across the wet deck, tail wagging.

“Quiet, Murph,” Rafe said without looking up.

“Ahoy there, matie!” Lexie called, clutching the handle of her wooden box.

Rafe straightened abruptly. He dropped the hose and jumped onto the pier to turn off the tap. Wiping his hands on the back of his jeans, he nodded at the boat. “What do you think?”

“Awesome.” Lexie lifted her box. “I came to paint the name on it for you. I take it—” she glanced at the existing name in flowing script across the bow “—
Mikonos Princess,
is the previous owner's name for the boat. Have you got a new name?”

He stood beside her to study the forty-seven-foot craft. “I was going to call it
Someday.
”

“That doesn't apply anymore, does it?” she asked.

Rafe's gaze flicked to her before he turned back to the boat. “Lately I've been thinking of naming it
Yin Yang.
”

“I like it,” she said.
Was that a reference to her?
“I could paint the symbol after the name.”

“While I was researching mizuko kuyo I looked up the term,” he said casually. “Yin and Yang
are
opposites but they're also—”

“Two sides to the same coin,” she finished.

“Two halves that make up a whole.” He turned to her, his gaze searching. “What do you think? Are we two halves of a whole?”

Lexie swallowed. For a long moment, she stared at him.
Were
they two halves of a whole? Could she really have found her soul mate in this unlikely man?

“You left in a hurry earlier,” she said.

Rafe glanced down at his gumboots and scuffed the pier. “Hetty said I should be patient with you. Thing is, you'd need to be patient with me, too.”

“Rafe! Hey, mate, howya doing?” a man called from about thirty feet away. “You ready to rock and roll?”

Lexie glanced over to see a tall blond man with
glasses and a petite brunette approaching. They carried a cooler between them. The man had a baby backpack strapped on. A little blond boy about a year old peered around his dad's shoulder.

Everyone seemed to have babies, Lexie thought with a sudden stab of pain. Except for her.

“Hey, Chris, Laura.” Rafe looked back to Lexie. “I used to work with Chris. I'm taking them out fishing. Do you want to come?”

“I…have things I need to do.” She took a step back. Being with Chloe was one thing; she'd known her for so long. But she wasn't ready to coo over a stranger's baby. “I've realized my little box of paints isn't going to do the trick. I'm going to need marine enamel. And heavy duty solvent to strip the old paint.”

“I'll take off the old paint.” Rafe glanced sideways at his approaching friends. Then he met Lexie's gaze straight on. “I don't believe you when you say you don't love me.”

“Rafe—”

“Shh, they're almost here and I want to say this.” He spoke more urgently. “I don't know what the future holds. I only know that I want to be with you. You and me. Everything else is negotiable.”

And then his friends were there, exclaiming over the boat. Eyeing her curiously.

She smiled at the couple then spun and walked
away. It was too late to tell herself she wasn't going to get involved with a younger man.

She loved him.

The realization made her stop dead in the middle of the wharf. This was about so much more than just sex, or friendship, or whether or not to have a child. This was about the rest of her life.

She started walking again, faster. Her heart was well and truly on the line.