Two Outta Three (Two Outta Three #1) (17 page)

Chapter 22

Stephanie: Where are you?

Me: I’m in Charleston with Jesse

Stephanie: WHAT? WHY?

Me: He wanted to show me something

Stephanie: Show you what? His penis?

I rolled my eyes and muttered a few choice curse words under my breath before I began to text again.

Me: He wanted to explain to me—in person—all the secrets he was keeping from me

Stephanie: Like what?

Me: I’ll tell you later. Just wanted to text you that I’m not hurt or anything

Stephanie: Yet

I chewed at my lip nervously and snuck a peek in Jesse’s direction. His hands were at ten and two, wrapped so tightly that his knuckles were almost paper white.

Me: I’ll talk to you later. Bye.

I didn’t wait to see her response. Throwing the phone in my pocket, I leaned my elbow against the bottom of the window and propped my chin onto my fist.

“How’s Stephanie?” Jesse said slyly.

“How’d you know…?” I shook my head. “Forget it, dumb question.”

His grin stretched from ear to ear. “I was once part of those musketeers, remember?”

“Once.” I kept my head turned, staring at the cars and trees that passed by. As I caught sight of pedestrians, joggers, and dog walkers, I couldn’t help but wonder if any of them knew Jesse better than I did. Did any of them eat at his restaurant? Hang out with him?
Date
him? Once again I felt as if my stomach was punched with emotion.

“I live just three miles away from the restaurant. I usually run to work when it’s nice outside.”

I turned back in surprise. “You run?”

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“Well, considering you were smoking a pack a day in high school, yes it is.” Noticing the darkening of his expression, I quickly added, “Congrats on quitting, by the way. I know it was probably a hard thing to do.”

“Have you seen my mom?” He shifted slightly, causing the leather seat to purr. “It’s not like I had a choice.”

Somehow an apology didn’t seem to suffice so I just resigned to saying nothing at all. In fact, I kept my mouth shut from the pizza parlor—only grunting when asked what toppings I wanted—all the way to his apartment complex. By the time we rolled to a stop in a space marked 5B, I was on the verge of hyperventilating.

I took a moment to stare at the building in front of me. Though it was brightly painted green, it felt as if it loomed darkly over me. It was as if a part of me knew that this night could either make us or break us even more.

We climbed up the steps to the second floor quietly, dragging our feet. It reminded me of how I’d assume prisoners walking to the gallows felt, desperate to stall the inevitable but knowing they had no choice but to trudge on. When I caught sight of the metal “5B” hanging in the middle of a tan painted door, all my fears and apprehension blew up in my face. I was almost tempted to face the guillotine myself, and was this close to asking Jesse to drive me home. Of course, I didn’t and I wouldn’t—it would be too dangerous.

Jesse’s keys jingled as he placed it into the lock. The pizza box was gripped tightly between his arm and waist and smelled like delicious cheesy goodness. Despite feeling as if my stomach was tied into knots it grumbled loudly.

“Hungry?” Jesse chuckled.

I nodded my head quietly, suddenly feeling shy.

“Well, we can eat in a second.” He turned the knob and pushed the door open, revealing a cozy apartment. “Welcome to my humble abode.”

He moved aside, allowing me to enter first. I took a hesitant step into his foyer and gazed around. The apartment was Jesse to the fullest. The walls were painted a dark blue, which made it feel like midnight despite the bright lights shining down from the ceiling fan. It created a certain ambiance that made my insides tickle.

“I don’t even have to ask you if you’re hungry,” he teased, placing the greasy box on a dark stained high rise dining table. The four seats around the table were pushed back slightly, making me wonder just how many guests he has coming and going.

Pushing back the thought, I smiled weakly. “What happened to the tour?”

Scratching his head, he shrugged, embarrassed. “It’s a small space, Rocky. Not much of a tour is needed.” He turned at his waist and pointed around the room. “Kitchen, living room, and bedroom. The laundry room is communal and on the first floor.”

Bedroom.

I felt my cheeks flush. “Oh, well, it looks like a nice place.”

And that it did. It was the stereotypical bachelor pad complete with a huge flat screen TV, worn couch, and just enough wall hangings to break up the monotony of the dark walls.

“Thanks. It’s home.”

Cue my grumbling stomach. I placed my hands on top of my abdomen and grinned sheepishly.

Jesse flashed his pearly whites. “Let’s eat.”

***

Jesse and I were perched on opposite ends of the dining table, which was pushed near the far wall of the apartment. The dining area and the living room were separated only by his couch, giving us a great view of his television set. In a comical version of déjà vu, I once again found myself barely paying attention to
Law and Order
, with no sense of what was going on in the show. However, if asked I could describe each bite Jesse took and each swig of water perfectly.

Peering at him from the corner of my eye, I could make out the way his top teeth bit into the crust, nibbling at the edges as if he wanted to savor each bite. Though I tried to convince myself I was still mad at him for the dildo incident and for quitting with no notice, I couldn’t help but find myself wishing it was my skin he was nibbling—
tasting
and savoring.

“Did you want something else to drink?”

I blinked, jarring myself from my self-induced trance. “I’m sorry?”

“I only have water here. I forgot to ask if you wanted a beer or something.”

“I don’t drink like that,” I reminded him.

“Funny, me too.” He grabbed a napkin and carefully wiped off his hands. “You tired?”

It was as if his words suddenly lulled me to sleep. I felt myself yawning and my eyes begin to water. I guess I was more exhausted than I thought after all. But if it was time to sleep, that meant we’d have to discuss sleeping arrangements, and from the look on Jesse’s face it seemed as if he wasn’t looking forward to having the conversation either.

As if to stall further, he reached for his water and brought it slowly to his lips. I watched his throat bob up and down with each glug he took, praying the glass would last forever. Finally, after polishing off the entire glass, he rolled out his tongue, licking the remnants of water from his lips.

Was he making this situation harder on purpose?

With shake of my head I asked, “Where can I sleep?” I pointed towards the fluffy looking couch. “I can sleep over here.”

He shook his head profusely. “No. What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t have the decency to offer you my bed?”

“No, it’s okay. I really don’t mind sleeping on the couch. Believe me, I’ve slept on worse.” I let out a weak laugh and gulped.

“No, I insist. It’s my fault we’re stuck here and the least I could do is make sure you’re comfortable.”

The thing with Jesse is that if he insisted, then you better go along with the plan or he’d never stop nagging you about it. Begrudgingly, I nodded my head “Sounds great.”

Chapter 23

Jesse’s knee bounced up and down, shaking the entire column of bleachers. The world around me seemed to quicken in its orbit and I found myself reaching out and placing my hand firmly on his leg to steady my equilibrium. His jeans were ripped in strategic places, and though the mall sold what looked to be the same exact pair for about eighty dollars a pop, I could guarantee that Jesse’s jeans were worn down from years’ worth of use and dodging authority.

My fingers brushed up against his exposed skin and I felt his knee instantly warm. He abruptly pulled back his leg and twisted around so our faces were inches apart.

Despite the cold autumn night, I felt heated from my core. With each one of his exhales I felt his warm breath bathe my upper lip and I couldn’t help but imagine that this is what it would feel like only moments before our first kiss—
my
first kiss.

“Do you know what I want to do right now?” His voice was hoarse, as if he had spent the last few hours screaming at the top of his lungs as opposed to speaking quietly with me.

I shivered. “Maybe the same thing I want to do.”

I was both proud and appalled at my ability to speak that thought out loud.

Jesse nodded his head and trembled slightly. His eyelids lowered, acting as a hood over his eyes, which seemed a bit redder than usual. “I think I want to prove something.”

“Huh?” I blinked in surprise. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

When I was met by silence, I decided there was a far deeper meaning to his words than he was letting on. So, as had become customary since his father left him the year before, the urge to protect him once again surfaced.

“You know you don’t have to tell me. If you don’t feel comfortable, you don’t have to share anything you don’t want to. You never have to with me.”

The corner of his mouth lifted into a soft smile. “So all I have to say is something along the lines of ‘I’m not comfortable telling you’ and it’s my free pass to keep secrets?”

I hated to think Jesse would keep anything from me. I was his best friend after all, but a best friend knew that sometimes secrets were necessary for self-preservation. “Yeah.”

He pulled his head away and looked from left to right. The mischievous look that had become so familiar to me once against flashed across his face. “Do you trust me?”

“Uh, yeah. What kind of a dumb question is that?”

He nodded in satisfaction. “Good. Wait here for me, okay?”

“What? Where are you going?” I stood up, letting the skirt of my dress fall in ruffles at my legs.

Jesse automatically reached up and yanked me back down. “Please. I’m going to do something really quick, but I need you to stay.”

“Do what?”

Neon warning signs flashed through my mind. He was definitely up to something and I needed to follow him to make sure he was okay.

“I may not feel comfortable telling you, but I’ll show you.”

“Jesse—”

He stood up, pulling the jacket tighter around my shoulders. “Stay right there. I’ll be back soon.”

***

Jesse led me down the short hallway to his bedroom, slowly flipping on the light. I squeezed in beside him, leaning against the narrow doorframe.

“Nice room,” I commented, taking in his Cali-King sized bed complete with a matching flannel set. “Didn’t take you for a plaid kind of guy.”

“It was on sale.”

He rushed forward, walking towards an oak dresser that seemed oddly familiar. I watched him dig inside, trying to figure out why I was experiencing a strange sense of déjà vu. That’s when it hit me. It was decorated similarly to his house back in North Carolina. From the plaid to the wooden accents and even to the shaggy carpet, this apartment was basically a scale model of his old room back home. I couldn’t help but smile. No matter how much he tried to deny it, he really did miss Bethel Falls, even if only subconsciously.

Opening up another drawer, he pushed aside random shirts and pants. “Since sleeping in jeans is quite horrible—”

“How would you know?” I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Junior year, graffiti incident, remember?” He winked.

“Ah, yes. You ran from the cops, hopped a few fences, and ended up falling asleep in the woods. How could I forget?”

“What can I say? I have a checkered past.”

You don’t say.

Pulling out two articles of clothing, he shut the drawer and strode back to me. Stopping a few inches away, he held out some pajama bottoms and an old t-shirt. “Will these do for pajamas?”

I nodded and gratefully and took the clothing, which were a few sizes too big. It was apparent that Jesse liked sleeping in baggy clothes, which says a lot about the pair of pants I was holding. I’d have to wrap the drawstring twice around my waist to even get them to stay on me.

As he released the shirt, he pulled back, as if afraid to touch my skin. “I have an extra toothbrush in the medicine cabinet. Feel free to use whatever else you need.”

“Thanks.”

Without another word, he grabbed some clothes from the top of a nearby laundry basket and marched out of the room, carefully closing the door behind him.

Frowning, I looked after him and muttered, “Good night, I guess.”

I took my time in the bathroom, running the day’s events in my mind. I would never have imagined ending up in Charleston in Jesse’s apartment, of all places, as a result of one visit to his mom. Prying open the medicine cabinet, I grabbed the extra toothbrush and quickly shut the glass. It was hard not feeling like a creeper in his bathroom, and though I probably would get to know him a bit better by finding any medication or ointments, I decided against it.

You might find condoms too.

Rolling my eyes at my ridiculousness, I resigned to brushing my teeth and getting ready for bed. When the time came to pull on his clothes, I paused. It seemed almost intimate to do so. Sure, I’d worn his jackets before, but this just seemed a little too close for comfort. I gripped his shirt, contemplating on whether or not I should just wear my own clothes. After another yawn escaped me, I knew there was no way I’d get any sleep in jeans, and before I could change my mind, I slipped on the clothing faster than I ever had in my life.

I inched my way towards his bed and paused right before climbing in. In all my years of fantasizing about ending up in his bed, this was definitely not what I had expected. One slow leg at a time, I finally found myself in the middle of his gigantic mattress. It was comfortable, no doubt about that, and it sagged just a bit in the center. In fact, I could almost make out the imprint of his body against the fluffy mattress. I scooted over right on top of it and pulled the comforter up to my neck, inhaling his familiar scent, imagining that I was wrapped in his arms as opposed to lying alone in a strange room on a monstrosity of a bed.

The apartment was silent; the only sounds were coming from my breathing. For a moment I worried that Jesse had walked out and left me alone for the night, but that fear was swept away once I heard him cough in the living room. Though I was still exhausted, I found the silence a bit too hard to bear and was unable to fall asleep. I tossed and turned, counted sheep, and changed my position about ten times. Somehow amidst the trouble, I must have drifted off because the next thing I knew was waking up, scorching hot and breathless.

“Oh!” I gasped, bolting straight up. My eyes flew open, darting around, trying to remember where I was. A bead of sweat slid down the base of my neck, rolling until it rested on the collar of Jesse’s old shirt. My breaths were heavy and my heart ran rampant. I rubbed at my forehead and slicked back my damp hair. If I hadn’t recalled my dream, I would have thought I was getting sick and chalked it up to karmic punishment for lying about being ill.

My throat was parched and sandy. I knew I had no choice but to brave Jesse’s apartment and risk waking him up for a glass of water. Sure, I could have opted for some tap from the bathroom, but after watching a news special about the germs that infested the water it was only purified water for me.

I threw one leg over the edge of the bed and then the other, hopping down from the high mattress. When my feet landed on the shaggy carpet, I slowly scuffled around until I found my way to the bedroom door. I was too afraid to turn on the light, worried that I’d somehow wake up Jesse. After the very vivid and detailed dream I had I could surely go another day without having to see him face to face.

“Aha!” Finally feeling the door knob, I opened the door as slowly and as quietly as I could. It ended up I didn’t need to be so gentle because soon the sounds of the television greeted me hello.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

“Ahh!” I yelped and jumped back, not expecting to hear Jesse’s voice.

The sound of his grunt echoed through the tiny apartment, quickly followed by, “You can join me in ordering this amazing juicer if you want.”

“What?” I squinted my eyes, glancing over at the television set. My eyes were still adjusting to the light and I winced, feeling the sharp sting in its muscles.

“If you call now you can get two free recipe books,” he muttered.

“Oh.” Even saying one word caused my throat to cry out in pain. I had never felt this dehydrated from sleep before; then again I had never had such a
work out
either. “Um, I just want a glass of water.”

My eyes fully adjusted, I could make out the silhouette of the back of his head peeking from the top of the couch. The television’s glow added a halo type effect around him, making him look like the angel I wished he was. He lifted his arm and waved it towards the kitchen. “Help yourself, the glasses are in the right cabinet.”

I nodded despite the fact that he didn’t look back at me and headed towards the kitchen. As I marched toward the refrigerator, I was vaguely aware that he had finally turned his head and was watching my every move.

“You know my clothes look better on you than they do on me. Maybe I should let you keep it.”

Recalling our old banter, I chuckled as I poured myself a glass of water. “Nah, who’d want these old things?”

He threw his head back and laughed, all at once alleviating any weirdness in the air. Though I was still harboring a good amount of awkwardness, I reminded myself it was only a dream and even grew brave enough to take a seat beside him on the couch. Granted, I was all the way on the other end, but still, it was the thought that counted.

We sat in silence for a while, watching some over enthused audience members sip their juices as if they were goblets of ambrosia. Once a commercial break hit, which was odd given the whole program was a commercial, Jesse turned to me.

“Did you have a bad dream?”

“What?” I asked with alarm.

“I heard you in there. You were breathing hard and moaned a bit.”

I instantly blushed. “I did not moan!”

He turned the corners of his lips down and nodded. “Actually, you did. I heard you.”

I was mortified. Jesse heard me having a sex dream about him. I didn’t even know girls could have wet dreams, but effing shit, did I prove that theory wrong. The fact that I was wearing his clothes and sleeping in his bed must have messed with my mind. I tried hard to push away the fuzzy images of Jesse’s shirtless body and intense touches by quickly changing the subject. “You’re quite the night owl. Have you been up this whole time?”

“Yes, I heard everything,” he said knowingly.

Fuck! There went any chance at changing the subject.

“Like what?” I gulped.

Instead of answering me, he turned his head in my direction while keeping his body facing the T.V. One long arm reached across the top of the couch pointing towards me while the other gripped at a huge throw pillow draped across his lap.

“What did you hear?” I shifted in my seat, trying hard to look away from him. Too bad, I couldn’t. It was as if his eyes were a magnet to mine.

“Did you know I stopped by your house two nights ago?”

“Wait, what?” My brain was still muddled up from my dream; I had no idea what we were talking about anymore.

He bowed his head slightly causing his messy hair to flop forward. “I felt bad about what went down at the store. I knew it was a dick move and I should have apologized, but again I hated how much I felt like the old Jesse, you know?”

I kept my face straight. “When did you come over?”

“When do you think?” He chuckled. “I rolled up to your house and saw a strange car in your driveway. I knew you parents were gone and it couldn’t have been Emily’s. It didn’t take me long to figure out it was Ethan’s prissy ride.”

I bit the inside of my cheek and flinched. “Uh, yeah he wanted to cook for me.”

“Cook for you, huh?”

I nodded.

Jesse inched towards me causing the couch to creak underneath him. “You know what ‘cooking for you’ is code for, right?”