Authors: Jaime Stryker
God, she had dreamed for so long to find a man with this kind of integrity. She realized that deep down she had already known Tom was not that kind of man, but she refused to see it. She had so wanted to be loved and accepted for the woman she was, so wanted the dream, and it kept her from seeing what was right in front of her.
The two of them spent the next few minutes in awkward silence while Terri gathered up some extra sheets and pillows from the linen closet.
She started to make up the couch, but he waved her away saying, “It’s okay. Let me do it.” He promptly took the beddings from her, their hands briefly touching.
Not knowing how far to press him on anything now, she stepped back. “Are you sure?”
“Yep,” he said, spreading the sheet. “This’ll be fine. Compared to a night out camping in the mountains, this is a five star hotel.”
She noticed that he was still dressed in his full uniform though, striking a handsome pose.
“Thanks again for staying tonight.”
He nodded and said, “In the morning, we’ll figure out what to do next.”
They stood there for a moment in silence again. Only the sound of their breathing permeated the room. Not a word was said, but there was a deafening cacophony of emotion in their minds.
“Good night,” Terri said, heading for the stairs.
“Night,” Jake called after her as he turned out the lights.
It took a while, but, eventually, Terri fell into a fitful sleep. The ringing of her cell phone had awakened her from a vivid dream where she was running around the lake surrounding the ranch. In the dream, she was searching frantically for something, but she couldn’t recall what it was she was trying to find. She was afraid of looking into the water lest that reflection of him—of Terrence—would appear again.
She thought she would let the phone go to voicemail, but it just rang again and again. She reached over to the nightstand, picked it up, and saw the number was Martin’s office.
“Hey, Martin,” she said, still feeling groggy and trying to sit up.
“I woke you up,” Martin said on the other end of the line, sounding tense. “I forgot about the time difference.”
“It’s okay. What’s going on? You sound so serious. I needed to get up anyways,” she wondered if Jake was still downstairs. Was he waiting on her to get up?
“I hated to call you, Terri. I know you’re trying to sort things out, but…”
“It’s okay. What’s going on?”
“Hanson insisted that I call you. He’s freaking out.”
John Hanson was one of the senior partners at the firm she worked for, and Terri knew him to always be a calm and collected man. For him to be upset, it must be something big.
“What’s going on?”
“The clients on the McBriar case are upset with the direction of the proceedings with their new copyright infringement suit. They’re threatening to walk and go to another firm unless you come back pronto to take the case over,” Martin answered.
McBriar Inc. had been one of her firm’s biggest clients for two decades and a leading software designer in the computer industry. The CEO had always been a bear to handle, but for some reason, Terri always had had the magic touch with dealing with him.
“I know you need your time off, and I hate to ask you to do this, but…” Martin started to say.
“Don’t worry. I’ll head back on the earliest flight to New York,” she answered firmly.
“Are you sure? I know you’ve got a lot of
stuff
to deal with right now.”
“I’m very sure, Martin. If I can save this client relationship, I’m going to. For you. For Hanson. For the firm.”
“Thanks so much, Terri. If anyone can save it, it’s you.”
“I’ll call you when I’m at the airport. Besides, I think I might have overstayed my welcome in Montana,” she said.
“Huh, what do you mean? Did you have a run-in with the law and are getting run out of Dodge?” he joked, not realizing how accurate he was.
“Martin, as usual, you are uncanny,” she replied. “I’ll tell you all the dirt when I get back. Make sure my favorite coffee is brewing…”
After hanging up with Martin, she crawled out of the bed and went into the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth. How was she going to leave everything that needed to be done here, too? She had the clean-up, the excavation, not to mention wanting to right things with Jake.
She heard voices coming from outside her window, and when she walked over she looked down in the yard to see Jake talking to Professor Redfeather, who had already returned with his team for another day of digging. The two men looked pleased to see each other as they shook hands and chatted.
So much had been started here and left unfinished. Terri had
made
herself the type to finish things. The thought of whether she was using this business emergency as an excuse entered her mind, but she realized that she did have to go. John Hanson, along with the other partners, had more than given her a few opportunities, and she owed it to him and the firm. Plus, she still had bills to pay, and her job, the career she had so fought for
,
was important to her. Terri discovered when you are indecisive, sometimes life makes the decisions for you.
After a quick shower and dressing in a pair of jeans and sleeveless light blue blouse, she headed downstairs, looked through the window, and saw Jake standing on the porch watching the professor and his team head out to a plot of land behind the house.
She gathered her courage to face him again and walked outside to stand next to him.
“Good morning,” she said cheerfully.
“Morning,” he said, giving her a quick glimpse.
She could have sworn she saw hurt
and
desire in his eyes.
“Professor Redfeather was asking about the graffiti,” Jake said. “He was very concerned for you.”
“You can tell him what happened. You can tell him
everything.
I have nothing to hide.”
She immediately regretted those last words since she had hid something from Jake, something big, and she knew it.
“I had some more officers come out. They’re questioning the neighbors down the road to see if they saw or heard anything.”
“Thank you,” she replied. “And thanks again for staying last night.”
“No problem,” he said, looking at her again but this time keeping his gaze fixed on her.
She wondered if he was as conflicted as she was. She thought he looked torn between wanting to turn away again or to kiss her. God, how she wished he would grab her up in his arms again. She wanted to feel his body pressed against hers again more than anything. But she was also rationalizing in her mind that what happened that night might have been the last.
“Jake, I…umm…I have to leave to go back to New York.”
He looked stunned for a moment before saying quietly, “When?”
“On the first flight I can get out of Billings.”
“You’re running away?”
“I’m
not
running away,” she said, wishing she hadn’t sounded so defensive just then. “I just got a call. It’s work. There’s an emergency. A lot of money is involved, and they seem to think I’m the only one who can handle the situation. I’m not sure how long it will take, and there’s so much going on here with the dig, the house and with…”
Her voice trailed off. She wanted to say so much going on with
us
. But she didn’t know if she and Jake had any semblance of an
us
now.
“I want the professor to continue his work though, but I’m worried about the house,” she said.
“I’ll stay here for a while,” Jake replied. “I know a good painter who’ll take care of the graffiti for you. I’ll keep an eye out on things.”
“I can’t ask you to do that,” Terri said.
“You didn’t ask me. I volunteered. Look, Bud did a lot for me when I was just a teen. Sometimes he was the only father figure I had. So, I want to watch over things for him…and you. It’s the least I can do.”
Terri felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude, but before she could tell Jake, a cry came from the distance. It was the Professor.
“Jake! Come see this!” they both heard the professor call out excitedly.
“Be there in two shakes of a lamb’s tail, Professor!” Jake called back, before turning back to Terri and said, “Let me go see what he’s found now. He’s very excited so far.”
“I guess I should go start packing,” she said about to turn away from the man who awakened deep emotions within her. She felt the moment was bittersweet.
He looked like he was about to say something, but then he just nodded and walked down the steps and towards Professor Redfeather.
She watched him for a moment, his masculine figure walking away from her, possibly forever. Terri wished so badly that things could have been different. She was speeding into town upon her arrival and now her departure left her with a slow, aching feeling inside.
Chapter 12
Four months later.
“Terri?”
The sound of her name snapped her back to reality as she had been staring out her skyscraper office window watching all the people on the street below running around like worker ants. She loved the energy of New York City--the way that it felt like anything could happen anytime and the possibilities were endless. And yet, she also missed the quiet vastness of the Montana landscape. Her two worlds. Apparently irreconcilable.
“Martin,” she said, turning around. “I’m sorry. I didn’t hear you walking in. I guess I was lost in my thoughts.”
“I bet!” Martin exclaimed, walking in and smiling from ear to ear. “Trying to figure out how you pulled off that miracle in the courtroom today? What are you going to do for an encore, lady? Walk on water? That was pure genius today.”
Upon returning to New York, Terri had convinced McBriar Inc. not to bolt on their firm, and she ultimately, after many long weeks, won their case for them.
“Thanks, Martin,” she replied. “That was a tough one.”
“A tough one, but you did it. I knew you would though. Want to go grab drinks tonight with the rest of the team to celebrate?”
Normally, Terri would automatically say yes as the celebratory drinks after a hard case won was practically mandatory, but she had allowed herself to be so consumed with the work that she never let herself emotionally deal with all she left behind in her short time in Montana.
“Would it be okay if I just headed home? I’m not feeling well.”
“It wouldn’t be the same without the star lawyer! Hope nothing too bad,” Martin said concerned.
“Nah. I’ll be fine.”
“You still thinking of Montana? The ranch? Of Jake?” Martin inquired. She had confided in him upon her return and always, he was the eternal optimist.
“You know me too, well, Martin. Am I that transparent?”
“I just know you. That’s all. Well, rain check on the drinks then. I’ll give everyone your regrets.”
“Thanks, Martin. I think I just need time alone tonight.”
“Of course. But before I go, remember that talk we had before you left for Montana?”
“Yes, you talked about the important things in life,” Terri recalled.
“Well, good work has its place. But don’t forget that love is what binds it all together. There’d be no one to share things with. Without love, what’s the point?” he said with eyebrows raised while closing her office door quietly behind him.
Once she got back to her apartment in Greenwich Village, she poured herself a glass of Chardonnay, and sat on her balcony to relax watching the sun set over the vibrant city and the skyscrapers lighting up horizon. Just that morning before heading into the courtroom she had gotten a call from Professor Redfeather.
In the time since she left Montana and after some deep thinking, she did something she thought would please Uncle Bud. She donated the entire ranch to Professor Redfeather’s organization so that further study and preservation would be done.
The professor had been thrilled and insisted that they would leave the ranch house on the property, and Terri would be able to stay there any time she felt like it. He’d have that stipulation drawn up in the papers.
Terri thought about Jake often while working or at home alone. She hadn’t spoken to him since she left, but she learned through the professor that Jake would stay on at the ranch until the property transfer to watch over things for her.
So many nights, she wanted to pick up the phone and call him and try to talk things out. But she was ashamed to admit that fear kept her from doing so. What if he simply didn’t want to talk about it? He never tried to call her. And why would he? After all, she had left him behind in Montana to deal with everything: the excavation at the ranch and especially the town learning her about her secret. She had abandoned him and wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t want to see her again. Terri felt she had no compelling reason to go back to Montana even though her heart ached to see Jake again.
But to her surprise, Professor Redfeather called later that night and said, “You must simply come for the dedication ceremony, Miss Lawson. It would mean so much to all of us to thank you in person for your generosity.”
She was excited about the professor’s plans to turn the land into a research center and, ultimately, a museum that could draw visitors to Clearview. It was a win-win situation for all. Now that the site had been also legally given historical preservation status, it was protected from Carl and his condo project development. She knew the outcome would have made her Uncle Bud so happy if he were alive. But the fear of facing Jake and what he may
or may not
say haunted her as soon as she hung up the phone with the professor.
But then she remembered how Uncle Bud used to always tell her, “Don’t ever be afraid to be happy.
Ever.
Life is too short.”
She finished her glass of wine in one large gulp, a little liquid courage, and walked back in the apartment to go online and book a plane ticket to back to Billings, Montana.
***
Driving in her rental car back onto the ranch for the first time in months, Terri was amazed at the transformation. All of the mess from the tornado had been cleaned. The ranch had been freshly painted and that horrible graffiti covered over and wiped away. A sign at the beginning of the driveway announced that she had arrived to the “Clearview First Peoples Research and Study Center.”