Unbreak my Heart (6 page)

Clare’s face turned pale.
“Oh Crank, I’m so sorry.” She forced her gaze to shift from his rippled six-pack to his sad grey-blue eyes. “Does this mean you will be leaving the lake?” she asked, realising for the first time that she would be extremely disappointed if he said yes.

Crank
sucked in a deep breath and thanked her for her concern. “No, but it does mean that I will be getting some visitors at my cabin for a week or so. My twin, sixteen-year-old nephews, Edward and Michael, are arriving in Marshall this evenin’ around seven and I’ll be driving in to pick them up.”

As
he was busy talking to her, Brodie walked over to Clare’s SUV and stuck his head under the hood. “Looks like you’ve done a thorough job Crank. I doubt I could have fitted this radiator better myself.”

Crank felt a surge of pride.
“Thanks, Brodie.”

“Ye
s,” Clare added, “and thank you so much for getting the parts so promptly. I guess now that my SUV is finally fixed I can follow you back into Karnack and fix up the bill for my radiator and hoses.”

Brodie slammed the hood
shut and turned to face Clare. “There is no bill,” he said, surprised that she didn’t already know that. “The cost of the radiator and the hoses has been taken care of already.”

Clare’s mouth fell open in
complete surprise. “But I don’t understand. How and by who?”

Brodie
looked over at Crank. “Your boyfriend, Crank here, rang his business partner, Kurt Waylon, in Austin last night and explained what happened to your SUV, then asked him to arrange for the new radiator and hoses to be sent to my workshop overnight. I had nothing to do with it. If I had ordered them it would have taken days for them just to get here. Obviously his pal has some pretty good contacts.”

Clare glimpsed
regretfully at Crank’s muscular frame before turning back to face Brodie. “Crank’s not my boyfriend,” she piped up a little too defensively. “He’s just a friend.”

She turned her attention back to Crank.
“Why would your business partner in Austin pay for my radiator and hoses? I don’t even know him.”

Crank tried not to show his bemusement
but couldn’t stop himself from smirking. “I’m afraid he’s a bit of a sucker for damsels in distress. We both are; that’s how we were raised.”

She hated the fact that he found the whole situation humorous, but at the same time she
couldn’t help but notice how handsome he looked when he grinned. It had the effect of making his whole face light up. “But, why pay for them?” she asked. “Why not send them C.O.D?”

For
a brief second he almost confided to her that he and Kurt were rich enough to afford an entire new SUV for her without even making a dent in their bank accounts, but instead he took a more cautious approach. “Kurt has been my best friend for as long as I can remember,” he explained, “and any friend of mine is a friend of Kurt’s. You could try arguing with him, but I’m afraid he would never accept any money from you. He don’t work that way; Kurt’s one of the most generous and decent men I know.”

As
he finished his sentence, he realised that Willow was no longer by Clare’s side. Looking around, he spotted her over by his pick-up, sobbing, and walked over to see what was wrong. “What’s the matter Sweetheart?” he asked, kneeling down in front of her.

Willow
wiped her eyes with the back of her hands but almost immediately more tears flooded out. “I heard you say that your brother indoors had an accident.”

Crank smiled. “You mean my brother-in-law?”

“Yes,” she sobbed. “Does that mean he’s gonna die like my Daddy?”

Crank scooped her up into his arms and gave her a gentle hug. “Oh no
Sweetheart, he should be okay. Not everybody who has an accident dies.”

“Then why did my
Daddy die?” she sobbed, spilling hot little tears onto his shoulder.

Crank felt like his heart was about to explode.
Holding Willow in his arms felt just like holding Ellie when he would pick her up to comfort her or tuck her into bed at night. “I don’t know Sweetheart,” he said, wiping a tear from her cheek with the back of his finger. “Sometimes bad things happen to good people.”

Willow
put an arm around Crank’s neck and hugged him. “Sometimes you look sad too Crank,” she said soothingly. “Did something bad happen to someone that you loved too?”

A
s Crank nodded, a stray tear rolled down his own cheek. “Yes Sweetheart it did. But life must go on and we have to find a way to be happy.”

She smiled and arched her
blond brows. “You mean like asking you to come for a walk to the lake with us this afternoon?”

Crank’s heart lurched. “Does that make you happy?”

She nodded her head. “Aha, and it makes Mama happy too, that’s why she bought herself some new clothes today; to impress you.”

This time his heart started hammering. “Did
your mama say that she likes me?”

She nodded her head.
“Aha, last night after you went home, and there’s something else.”

Crank’s heart was now beating like a jackhammer. “What else?”
he asked nervously.

“I’ve been watching the way she looks at you,” she explained.

Crank felt a tightening in his chest. “The way she looks at me? What do you mean Sweetheart?”

Willow g
iggled. “She looks at you the same way she used to look at my Daddy.”

As Crank and Clare set out toward the lake from Clare’s cabin, Willow slipped in between them and grabbed a hand of each. “Is it far Crank?” she asked.

“Not too far,”
he replied happily. “And when we get there I have a special surprise for you and your Mama.”

“What is it?” she asked excitedly
; her blue eyes almost popping with curiosity. “Please tell me!”

“If I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise,” he reminded her, “but I have a feeling you are gonna like it.”

As they meandered their way along the well-used trail Clare couldn’t help but admire the picturesque beauty of the forest. “This place is truly amazing,” she exclaimed dreamily, craning her neck to look up at the towering cypress trees, draped with layers of Spanish moss, giving them an eerie, other-worldly appearance. For some reason the whole world looked perfect this afternoon and her heart sang as she drank in the beauty of the magnificent birds that soared in the sky above them and the wildflowers and ferns that filled the forest floor between the tall trees. Even the scent of the forest smelt sweeter than it had yesterday when she was broken down on the shoulder of the road.

Suddenly
she felt Willow’s hand break free from her grasp. “Crank, is that the lake ahead?” her daughter squealed, pointing excitedly as she spotted the water about twenty yards in front of them.”

She watched with a lump in her throat as h
e looked down at her daughter’s beaming face. “It sure is, Sweetheart.”

Willow looked up pleadingly at her
, breaking her trance. “Mama is it okay if I run ahead to the lake? I promise to be real careful and not go near the water!”

Clare looked up at Crank. “What do you think Crank? Is it safe for her to go ahead?”

Crank stopped and knelt down so he could talk to Willow eye-to-eye. “Do you promise to stay in view until we reach you?”

Willow gave him a slow exaggerated nod. “I promise!”

“Then I guess it’s okay for you to run ahead if it’s okay with your mom?”

“Okay,”
Clare said, rolling her eyes, “but be careful by the water until we get there.”

“Thank you M
ama, thank you Crank,” Willow said excitedly. “I will.”

Before
running off she grabbed her mother’s hand again and guided it over to Crank’s. “Here Mama you can hold Crank’s hand while I’m gone. He won’t mind.” She pushed their hands together and waited until their fingers entwined. “There ya go.” she said chirpily. “I’ll see
you
two at the lake.”

When she
had skipped out of earshot Crank turned to Clare and smiled. “She’s quite the little match maker.”

Clare looked up at Crank and
raised an eyebrow. “Is that such a bad thing?”

Crank was confused; his heart was hammering in his chest telling him to go for it
; that Clare and Willow could help mend his broken heart and allow him to feel love again, but at the same time his head was cautioning him and reminding him of his decision to back off before he got too involved.

Clare gently squeezed
his hand. “You’ve made a huge impression on her you know,” she said softly, brushing a stray lock of hair back behind her ear. “I’ve never seen her take to someone as quickly as she has taken to you, especially being a man. Normally she’s quite shy until she gets to know someone properly.”

Crank impulsively leaned down to kiss her, but b
efore he could Willow was back by their side. “Mama,” she exclaimed wide-eyed, the forest keeps going all the way out into the water. There are tall trees standing in the lake!”

She grabbed Crank’s other hand and tugged on it excitedly. “
Crank, hurry up, where’s my surprise?”

Crank
looked forlornly at Clare. He had wanted to kiss her so badly, but the moment had now passed and he was deeply disappointed. Forcing a smile, he pointed to the thin timber jetty where he had sat to drink his coffee earlier that morning. “It’s just up there by the jetty,” he explained, “not much further, I promise.”

When they reached the jetty, Clare and Willow both spotted the
old wooden dinghy moored to the jetty. “Crank, is that our surprise?” Willow asked, pointing to the weathered, grey boat that had possibly once been white.

“It sure is!” he assured her. “How would you ladies like to come for a scenic row
with me out on the lake for a half hour or so?”

“Clare looked a little apprehensive. “
Is it safe? It looks so old.”

Crank
nodded his head to reassure her. “It don’t look much, I’ll grant ya that, but I checked it over this morning and it is still very solid and safe.”

“But w
ho does it belong to?” she asked, still not convinced that going out on the water in it was such a great idea. “What if the owner comes looking for it and finds it gone?”

Crank let go of
her hand and walked out along the jetty until he reached the old boat and gently dragged it around in the water until they could both plainly see the name on the side of it.

“Hey, that’s my name!”
Willow exclaimed excitedly, pointing to the word
WILLOW,
neatly painted in large faded, black letters near the stern.

“I have a feeling that
this old dinghy belonged to your great granddaddy,” Crank explained to Willow as the two girls reached his side. “Either that or it’s one heck of a coincidence.” He looked up at Clare. “And if I’m right, that makes you and Willow the new owners of this boat. So what do you say we jump in and go for a nice, scenic row around the lake to test it out?”

Both of the girls looked at each other and grinned excitedly. “Yes please!” they
agreed in unison.

As the
three of them slowly meandered around the lake in the small, wooden dinghy, Crank suddenly realised that he was feeling genuinely happy and relaxed for the first time since Georgia and Ellie had been killed. And for the first time in six years he had actually spent an hour or so of his life without thinking about them. What’s more he was distracted not only by Clare’s beauty, but also by the timeless beauty of the lake and its surroundings.

As the realisation hit him,
he suddenly felt guilty. What sort of man was he? His wife and precious daughter, Ellie, were dead and here he was frolicking and enjoying himself with a new family as if they never existed; as if they were something that he could simply replace and move on.

Clare noticed the sudden frown on Crank’s face and felt confused. He had seemed in good spirits when they had left her cabin for the lake and certainly seemed cheerful enough as they set out in the boat .She had been discreetly watching his enthralled facial features
for the past half hour as he effortlessly rowed them around the lake and gave them a commentary about some of the fauna they had encountered, such as the majestic Peregrine Falcon, which had briefly circled overhead to check them out, and the very cheeky pair of Alligator Snapping Turtles which had briefly followed their boat.

Clar
e had also been discreetly admiring his powerful biceps as he stroked the oars, and imagined what it would be like to feel his lips on hers and how it would feel to be held in those powerful arms.

“Is anything wrong Crank?”
she asked, rousing him out of his reverie.

“Please forgive me
for frowning,” he apologised, forcing a smile. “I guess I’m just a little worried about my brother-in-law, Eli,” he lied, deciding not to tell her about his own tragic family losses and the guilt he was enduring for feeling happy for the first time since their deaths. He glanced down at his watch. “It’s getting late and I still have to drive in to Marshall to pick up my nephews. I’d better start rowing us back toward the jetty or I’ll be late picking them up.”

***

During the walk back to Clare’s cabin, Crank noticed that Clare was unusually quiet. “Clare, can we talk?” he asked, a minute or so after Willow had let go of their hands and announced that she was running ahead to wait for them on her mother’s porch. This time she had not linked their hands together as she had done on the way to the lake, and now, as they walked side by side, the silence and awkwardness between them was almost uncomfortable and deafening.

“To be honest Crank, I can’t
quite figure you out,” Clare said sadly, breaking the silence. “One minute you’re warm and open and friendly and the next minute you’re cool and moody and withdrawn. To tell you the truth it’s doing my head in. It feels like one minute you want to spend time with us and the next minute you don’t. I wish you could make up your mind.”

Crank reached
down and took her hand in his. Without speaking, he lifted it to his lips and kissed it gently. “I’m attracted to you Clare,” he said softly. “I have been since I first laid eyes on you yesterday, and it’s scaring the hell out of me.” He put a finger under her chin and gently lifted her gaze to meet his. “Clare, I’m 35 years old yet whenever I’m near you my pulse starts racing and my heart starts pounding like a lovesick teenager.”

Clare felt her heart skip a beat.
“I’ve been feeling the same way about you too,” she admitted. “But every time I look at you and my body reacts, I feel guilty, as if I’m cheating on Clay.” On impulse, she lifted up onto her tippy-toes and gave him a gentle kiss on the lips.

“What’s that for?”
he drawled.

Clare grinned. “No particular reason. It’s just that I’ve
been wanting to do that since you tried to kiss me earlier on our way to the lake.”

Crank
’s lips were still tingling from the unexpected kiss and his heart was hammering uncontrollably, but the guilt that he was experiencing earlier lessened despite the intimacy of the moment and he smiled at the irony. “I guess I owe you an explanation for my hot and cold behaviour,” he said, leading her by the hand to the shade of a large nearby Cypress. “I lost my wife, Georgia, and my six-year-old daughter, Ellie, in an automobile accident in Austin just over six years ago,” he confided. “Today in the boat when you asked me if something was wrong, I lied. I wasn’t thinking about my brother-in-law, I was feeling guilty for feeling truly happy for the first time in six years and for enjoying you and Willow’s company. Pathetic, isn’t it?”

Clare gently
took his other hand as well. “Oh my God!” she exclaimed sympathetically. “I can’t even begin to imagine what it would be like to lose a child. I mean, I was completely shattered when I lost Clay, and it took me a long time to bounce back, but if I had lost Willow at the same time …?” She shuddered and left the sentence unfinished. “Crank, I am so sorry.”

He wanted desperately to change the subject and lighten the mood, but he felt compelled to continue; to explain himself so she could better understand his irregular mood swings.
“When I found out Georgia and Ellie had been killed,” he continued, “a large part of me died with them and I honestly thought that I would never be happy again. In fact, to be perfectly honest, I didn’t ever really want to be happy again. But yesterday something changed. You and Willow ignited a tiny spark somewhere deep inside me and I think it’s begun to slowly thaw my frozen heart.”

“So what happens now?”
she asked breathlessly.

Crank shrugged his shoulders. “I wish I knew.
Last night I thought it would be best if I slowly drew away from you and Willow to protect myself from getting hurt again, but now I’m not so sure? Every time I see you I feel like my heart is being kick-started after being in tatters for so long, and when I interact with Willow her innocence and vitality and genuine enthusiasm for life makes me remember all the things I loved about being a parent and I suddenly can’t remember why I vowed not to risk falling in love and becoming a parent again.”

Clare glanced over at her cabin and saw Willow waiting patiently for them to hurry up and get there.
She had painstakingly dragged a chair to the edge of the porch and was sitting in it watching them intensely with her little legs kicking as if she didn’t have a care in the world.

Clare’s heart did a little somersault
, she so desperately wanted to grab Crank and just hold him to help take away some of his pain, but for Willow’s sake she knew she had to take things nice and slow and make sure that Crank was prepared to stick around for the long haul. At the moment, as much as she felt drawn to him and enjoyed his company, she had to consider the effect on Willow if he was to get involved in their lives and then suddenly get cold feet and do a runner back to Austin. Willow already adored him and was always asking,
‘Mom, when are we gonna go see Crank again?’

“Hey, slow down a bit
,” she said, trying to hide the fact that she was still feeling giddy from their kiss. “You’re getting a bit ahead of yourself. Let’s just agree to enjoy each other’s company over the next couple of weeks and see where it leads.”

Crank slipped an arm around her waist and
they resumed walking. “I’d like that very much,” he admitted.

“I have a confession to make,” Clare
announced happily as they reached her porch. “I was going to invite you over to our cabin for dinner tonight to thank you for generously fixing my car, so today, when we were in Karnack, I bought all these extra ingredients for the meal, but now you have to drive into Marshall and pick up your nephews.” She slipped her arms around Crank’s neck and pulled his head down so she could kiss him full on the lips. “I was planning on doing that after the meal when Willow was in bed,” she whispered breathlessly as their lips parted, but seeing as though you can’t come …”