Unbreakable (Accidental Crush #3) (18 page)

“That’s incredible. Does the football coach know?”

His smile drops just slightly. “He does. He said it will be tough, but you don’t really focus on your major until junior year, and he said players have done it before.”

“Really? See? And you were worried.”

He sits up a little straighter, his hand never leaving my leg. I can tell he’s happy, and I see the relief in his body language. I can’t help feeling the same way. As much as I don’t want him to go, I want him to get everything he wants even more.

“I still can’t believe I made it to the next round. I sang a song with my guitar for the video audition and figured it would never work, because it wasn’t from a musical or anything. I know this sounds lame, but I pretended I was singing it to you.” On that, his eyes meet mine. I can’t wait any longer.

I slide my body so I’m now sitting on his lap with my legs wrapped around him. I push my fingers through his hair and show him just how much I care about him through my kiss.

“Not. Lame,” I say through breaks between our kisses.

His hands slide down my back. There is so much passion, longing, and urgency in our kisses. I wish we could do this openly, but having to hide has made the time we are together even more special. Here, surrounded by such beauty, is so much better than making out by the lockers in the hallway at school.

“I have to tell my parents.”

“Yeah, you need to. How do you think your dad will take it if you get in?” I ask while he runs his hands through my hair. There is something about his fingertips running over my scalp that I can’t get enough of.

“I don’t know,” he says between kisses, “but we’ll find out, I guess.”

“What about baseball?”

“I can’t do both. I’d have to choose. Professor Murray said you have to be in either the fall or spring show, so if you can’t be in the fall show, it’s okay, but then you have to be in the spring play.”

“Oh. Are you okay with that?”

“I think I am. I mean, you have to do what you love, right?” I know he’s repeating my words, but he says them as second nature as his kisses trail down my neck.

In this moment, I feel in my bones he’s going to be fine. Telling his dad might be hard, and giving up baseball may be even harder, but he’s following his heart, and that’s all that really matters.

“I love you,” he whispers, “and I have something for you.” He pulls back and smiles.

My lips are raw in the best way. I know my hair is a mess, but I couldn’t care less. Todd’s hair is sticking up, and I try not to giggle at how carried away we just got. Then he turns around, and my heart stops when I see what he’s holding. There in his hand is his class ring with what looks like ten pounds of athletic tape wrapped around the bottom of it.

“I want you to have it.” He holds it out to me.

I can’t do anything; I just sit there motionless. I don’t think I could move if I tried.

“Is this a good shock or a bad shock?” he asks, trying to hide his smile.

I just look at him and then the ring, his eyes, the ring, eyes, ring, and I nod my head.

“Good, then?”

I still can’t say anything, so I smile as he grabs my hand, prying it open, and places the ring on my middle finger. With all of the tape wrapped around the band, it actually fits perfectly.

I shake my head in disbelief. “Thank you.”

“It looks good on you. Since we won’t be together for a few weeks, I wanted to give you something that reminded you how much I love you every time you look at it.” He gives me the warmest smile. “It looks almost as good as my jacket.” He pulls the jacket down so my arms slide out of it.

Before I know it, we both are undressing each other, and then we lie in Mark’s truck bed, surrounded by wool blankets underneath us and beautiful fall trees above us. Everything is crisp: the air, the sound of the fall leaves rustling, the wind lapping against the water’s surface. I hear it all, relishing in being wrapped in Todd’s arms.

He’s leaving soon. Too soon.

“Guess we’re going to be late for class.” He smiles down at me, making no effort to move.

“Guess so.”

“Let’s see”—he puts his hand out, palm up—“class?” Then he puts his other hand out as if he’s weighing something. “Or stay here?” Both of his hands go up and down, but “stay here” rises above the rest. “Oh, looks like stay here wins.”

I wrap the arm resting on his bare chest tighter around him and lean into him, nuzzling my face into the crook between his chin and shoulder. It’s like it was created especially for me. I love to breath in his scent, and it’s the perfect place to do that.

“Well, since we’re staying, let’s go swimming.”

“What? We need to get Mark’s truck back eventually, and you have practice. Coach won’t let you practice if you miss school.”

“Oh, but I didn’t miss. I was in homeroom, and so were you, remember? Come on.” His fingers intertwine with mine, and we both look down at the new foreign object now on my hand instead of his. The smile that forms on his lips will stay with me forever.

He raises his eyebrows. “It’s right where it should be,” he says, running his thumb over his ring.

“I love you.” I kiss him, biting his lower lip as I pull back.

Before I know it, the cool water is rushing around us. Luckily it’s not freezing since it’s been warmer than usual this year. There is some movement to the water, and now that we are in it, it’s not a lake; it’s more like a larger opening attached to a stream. It has a steady flow to it. Nothing scary, just creating some motion to the water as it splashes around us.

“Do you think we are allowed to actually swim in here?”

“Why not? We both know what we’re doing.” He pulls me closer. “You are on the swim team.” He gets even closer. “And I’m pretty sure I already saved your life once in the water.” He smiles and kisses me, pulling us both down so we are under the water, still kissing.

When we both break the surface again, my heart skips a beat at the beauty of his crystal blue gaze. I push the hair hanging in his eyes back to get it out of his face. He does the same for me, and our eyes lock. It feels like he can see right into my soul, unlike anyone else in this world. Then his eyes shift to my arms and his hands slide over them.

“Cold?”

“I’m good,” I answer, getting closer to him. “Just keep me warm.” I snuggle into him and lose all track of time.

We feel the sun beating on our faces as we float in the water, the coolness of the water kissing our skin as it moves around us. It’s just us, as it should be.

“How long do you think we’ve been in here?” he finally asks.

“No idea. But I don’t want it to end.”

“Me, either.” He kisses my head. “But I do need to get back for practice.” He locks his fingers with mine, and his eyes focus on his ring now on my hand. His smile makes my heart soar. Then he kisses me as deeply as I need him to, because this will be one of our last kisses for a while, and we both know it.

He pulls me toward land, and we both run for Mark’s truck as our skin retaliates against the cool air. We wrap ourselves in the wool blankets, since now that we are out of the water, we are both shivering.

Todd reaches for his phone to check the time. “Crap. We’ve gotta go. Practice starts in fifteen minutes.”

“I guess we officially missed the rest of school,” I say with a smile as I quickly pull my jeans back on. “How are you going to explain being wet when you get to practice?”

“I’ll figure something out.” He smiles as he pulls his shirt over his head.

“Luckily, if my mom asks, I can blame swim practice. She doesn’t need to know
where
I went swimming.” I give him a mischievous smile as we both jump back into Mark’s truck.

We can’t help laughing at how drenched we both are, but I don’t care what happens. I won’t ever trade these last three hours.

“I have twenty texts from Francis, asking if his truck is okay.” Todd laughs.

“Glad he cares so much about us.”

Todd’s fingers intertwine with mine as he starts to drive. I can’t stop looking at his ring.

“Thanks for this,” I say, lifting both our hands

He looks over and gives me his crooked smile. “You’re welcome.”

God, I love him.

Chapter 16: The Trip

TODD

We’re finally at Mt. Craymore. The boys and I have waited for this trip since we knew it existed freshman year, and thankfully, my parents didn’t try to kill this like they’ve killed everything else good in my life. I couldn’t wait to get away from everything. The only person I’m going to miss is Ashley.

I’m ready for college, but it all still feels so far away and so up in the air. The audition at Penn went well, I think. I have never been more nervous in my life. Playing at a packed pep rally is nothing compared to playing in an auditorium with only three people who don’t even crack a smile as they stare you down and jot notes in their little notebooks.

I did get an official verbal offer from Penn State, but nothing is truly official until signing day, so either one of us can still technically back out. Boston College is really interested, too. I try not to tell Ash too much because:

1.) Nothing is official

2.) I know, even though she tries to hide it, it really upsets her.

So much in my life feels like it’s undecided; everything except making it to state. That one is, unfortunately, decided.

I still replay that damn kick in my head every day. I’m not sure I will ever truly get over it. This trip is going to make up for all of that, though. This is our last trip together with all the guys before we go away to different schools.

Ryan has verbal offers from Notre Dame and NC State. Brian has at least three verbal offers, including Bama, which is also a school that has been courting MC, big time. MC has more offers than I can count. Penn is interested in all of us, but because there are other offers on the table, nothing is locked. I can’t imagine not being with the guys every day. Regardless, it could happen, so we need to make this trip count.

Mark, Brian, Ryan, and I are all rooming together. Tonight is going to be epic, drinking and skiing, but not in that order.

“Night ski!” Brian comes waltzing into our cabin. “Who needs state when we’ve got the senior ski trip, baby!” Brian is already slurring his words. I know he doesn’t blame me for state, but the words still sting.

“Whoa there, you need to slow down,” Ryan says, prying the Solo cup from Brian’s hand.

“Here, eat this.” Mark shoves half of his sub sandwich at Brian. “You need a base, or you’ll never make it through the night.”

I shake my head and laugh at the three of them. I love these guys. I wouldn’t trade this for the world.

***

Somehow, the party ended up in our cabin, where it’s wall to wall people. We haven’t actually made it to the slopes yet tonight, and at this point, I’m not sure we’re going to.

“I love you, man.” Brian drapes his arm around me and pulls me into a head lock. Then he does a chin nod across the room. I follow his gaze to Blythe. “And I love my girl, too. A girlfriend; who would have thought?” He leans in and says lower, “I’m head over heels for that girl.” And now I know he’s wasted because he’s never this open.

I unwrap his arm from my shoulder and try to help him stand up straight. “So much for the base,” I say with a smile.

“What? I’m good.”

“Right.”

Mark catches my look from across the room, reading it perfectly. He’s currently all over Amanda, a cute girl who has always been more interested in running track than guys, until tonight it seems. She’s currently very interested in Mark as she is equally all over him. He whispers something to her, and I see her smile then plant herself on the couch. Mark pushes through the crowd to get to Blythe, whispers something in her ear, and then they both make their way over to me and Brian who is now singing the National Anthem. I’m not sure why. Then he abruptly stops as if a new thought just entered his brain.

“Come on, we’re going to miss the night ski,” he says to the three of us, pouting like a three-year-old.

“Um … You’re not going anywhere,” Blythe intercepts as she wraps her arms around him.

I give Mark a smile. We both know she’s the only one he will listen to at this point.

“Come on, baby; don’t you want to go down my slope?” he asks in what I think was intended to be a whisper as he gyrates his hips in her direction.

Blythe throws her head back and laughs. Then she takes his hand and starts to lead him toward the bedrooms. She looks back and winks at me and Mark.

“Our job here is done,” Mark says.

We both give each other a head nod with a smile before he makes his way back to meet up with Amanda, who has been patiently waiting for him on the couch.

I start to miss Ash, but quickly shake it off as I make my way over to Ry, who’s across the room with Gretch and a few other people. Before I know it, Rebecca steps in front of me, blocking my path, and it’s clear she’s had almost as much as Brian.

“Hi, Todd.” She runs her hand down my chest.

“Hi, Rebecca,” I say flatly as I remove her hand.

“You know what?” she says, looking up at me. “I miss kissing you.” Then her fingers start to trace the buttons of my shirt.

I merely smile and try to push past her, but she’s surprisingly quick for someone who has had too much to drink.

“You. Are. A. Very. Good. Kisser.” She moves her fingers up from button to button on each word.

“Uh … Thanks?” I remove her hand again.

“You know, it’s too bad your girlfriend wasn’t allowed to come since she’s not a senior. What is she, a freshman? Oh, wait”
—
she waves her hand in the air
—
“she’s your ex-girlfriend, right?”

I press my lips together. I would never hit a girl, but right now, I wish Rebecca was a guy so I could cold cock her.

“Girlfriend. No ex. She’s my girlfriend, and you know that.” I try to contain my frustration, but it’s not really working. I’m so done with this girl, done being nice. Just done.

“We were really good together.” She smiles like she wants to do so much more than talk, making my stomach start to turn. “In the play, I mean.”

“Hey, Todd, can I talk to you?” I glance with relief in the direction of the voice. I could kiss Blythe right now.

“Sure. See you later, Rebecca,” I say with a quick smile while I pry her hands off my waist.

“Thank you,” I say quietly to Blythe as I approach her.

“You looked like you needed saving.” She smiles. “Brian is sound asleep.”

“Good. Thanks for that, too.”

“Anytime.”

We both join Ryan’s group who are all standing around the make-shift bar that has been set up on the kitchen counter. After an hour or two, most of the party has cleared out. Other than our core group, there are just a few guys from the team left. I am definitely feeling whatever drink Blythe has been making for us. I’m relaxed for the first time in months. This is exactly what I needed. I’m numb with joy, and it feels good. Being here makes me excited for college where there are no parents to hold you back from anything, to tell you what to do or who to date.

“Hey, where’s Brian?” Rick, one of the guys on the team, shouts from across the room.

“Yeah, where is that pansy?” someone else shouts. “I thought we were doing a night ski? What the fuck?”

“There’s no way you can ski right now,” Mark says as he slams back another shot.

“Who says?” Ryan jumps down from the countertop. Ryan is always the voice of reason, so maybe he’s right. Maybe we can.

“I’m pretty wasted,” Mark says with a pride-filled grin.

“Brian is asleep, and you’re all too wasted to go skiing,” Blythe says from behind the bar. “I know, because I’ve been making drinks for you guys from this ridiculous concoction of alcohol you have here.”

“Hey, it’s not like we can just walk into a liquor store and choose whatever we want.”

“Speak for yourself,” Mark interjects.

“Then where is it, slick? This is whatever we could sneak in,” Adam says.

“Hey, I’m not complaining.” Mark holds his hands up in surrender, spilling some of his drink down the front of his shirt.

“Point made.” Blythe smiles. “You are all too drunk to go tonight.”

“I’m going to wake Brian up.”

“Oh, no, you’re not, Adam.” Blythe steps in front of him, and I see Mark straighten like he’s ready to tackle him.

“No need. I’m up.” We all turn around to see Brian standing there fully dressed in his ski pants and jacket, skis in hand. “Let’s go.”

“It’s not a good idea, Bri. We need chaperones to ski,” Blythe says calmly.

“Please. Who says? We’re all practically eighteen. Some of us
are
eighteen.” He looks over at Mark who thrusts his arms up in the air in acknowledgment. “Mark can be our chaperone.”

“You know what I mean,” Blythe says, stepping forward.

“Come on, baby. This is our senior ski trip. You only get one.” Then he looks at Adam. “Well, Rogers might get two.”

“Fuck you!” Adam shouts back with a smile.

“You wish.” Brian smiles back.

“Hey, hey, two-year-olds. No one is going skiing,” Blythe says a little louder, getting everyone’s attention.

“Watch me. Get your skis. Slopes in ten minutes!” Brian shouts to the room.

Every part of my brain agrees with Blythe, but I know I can’t let them go without me. I can’t miss this, and someone needs to look out for Brian.

“MC?” Brian asks at his hesitation.

“Fine. I’m in,” Mark says. “I mean, you need a chaperone, right?”

“Baby?” He runs his hands over Blythe’s hips as he pulls her closer.

Blythe shakes her head. “You’re an idiot, but I love you.” She kisses him. “Fine, I’ll go.”

“That’s my girl.” He kisses her back then yells out to the rest of the room, “Ten minutes!” He glances over and sees Ryan and Gretch on the couch, oblivious to the new plan. “Taylor, remove yourself from Gretchen and get your damn skis.” He smiles and ducks to avoid the pillow Ryan chucks at him, and then we all start to depart to get our gear.

***

Once the cold air hits me, I feel invincible. As much as I know Brian sometimes has bad ideas, this isn’t one of them.

I’m with Mark on the lift, and up ahead, couple after couple is making out as we ride up the mountain.

Mark turns to me. “Want a go, Hamilton? I always thought you were pretty.” He leans in and then cracks a smile.

“You’re an ass.” I smack him in the head.

“Come on, everyone else is doing it.” He then shouts at the top of his lungs, “Oh, Todd! Stop! You’re so big and strong!”

I’m laughing so hard I can’t catch my breath, although I have now scooted as far over on the other side of our chair as humanly possible.

“Oh, Todd!” he continues to shout as we reach the drop off.

We both jump off to a crowd of our friends waiting. The guys are hooting and hollering, and the girls all have their arms crossed with disgusted looks on their faces, but they’re still smiling.

“Way to keep a low profile,” Blythe says, trying to hide her laugh.

“I’m sorry; it’s just so hard to contain myself when I’m around Hamilton!” Mark shouts, now gathering attention from other passersbys.

Rick and Adam are the last of our group, and as they approach the drop off, Adam shouts, “I’m riding with Hamilton next!”

“Don’t you know it!” I wink at Adam.

“Oh, no, you don’t.” Mark jumps on my back. “He’s mine.”

“Keep it moving, guys!” Ryan shouts back to us. He is already up at the starting position.

We finally meet up with the rest of the group while Mark continues to “fight” with Adam over me. We practically have the slopes to ourselves. We all put our headphones in before we push off. I’m blasting Fall Out Boy.

As we push off, I’m reminded of how much I love to ski. The rush of the speed is exhilarating, freeing. I have never skied at night, which turns out to be incredible. The lights are glistening off the pristine surface of the snow, and the sky is filled with stars. I didn’t even know this many stars existed. At home, we must only see a third of these. There are more sparkling stars than deep blue sky. It’s an entire sky of stars.

I’m in deep concentration on the bends, curves, and bumps left from other skiers. I am one with this course. I have never felt so alone yet so surrounded by friends in my life. My body feels the bends and turns, and I start to anticipate them. I’ve never skied this run before, but it’s like my body has. I no longer feel the cold; instead, I’m working up a sweat. I’m so glad we did this. Once again, Brian was right.

Up ahead, I see something blocking the path. It’s hard to make out because, even though the course is well lit, it’s still dark out. As I get closer, I see it’s moving, but not fast enough, and I know I need to swerve or I’m going to run right into it. Without even reading what’s to the right of me, I swerve on instinct, and my ski catches something. I don’t have time to think.

I’m on the ground at full speed. The control I had a second ago is lost, and I’m on my side, being dragged through the powdery soft snow from the sheer gravity of the slope. I can’t stop myself. I don’t even see the marker until my leg slams into it.