Unbridled (29 page)

“What time is it?” He sat up, his head muzzy and his eyes gritty.

“About eight. I was going to order supper in, but I didn’t know how long you would sleep.” She glanced at her feet, which were encased in red socks. “Actually, I didn’t want to go alone, seeing as how everyone on this ranch is pissed at me.”

Connor stifled a yawn. “Nah, no one is pissed at you. They were just worried about Daniel. The staff loves him and sometimes people forget he’s only eight. This gave them a wake-up call to stop accepting whatever he does as status quo.”

“So he won’t be spiking the pancake mix again?”

“How did you find out about that?” Connor took a drink of water.

She shrugged “He told me.”

Another time, another day, Connor would ask her what had happened during her afternoon with Daniel. For now, they’d had enough turmoil to last them at least a few days if not a week. Her stomach yowled into the silence, and sweetly enough, she blushed.

“Oops.”

Connor grinned and kissed her quick. “Let’s go see if Bernice has any food left for us.”

“You might want to comb your hair first. It’s, uh, looking like a rooster’s head right about now.” She played with his curls, a smile in her eyes.

Connor grabbed her and pulled her softness against him. Oh, but that was a mistake, yes indeedy. His body sprang to life even though it had been only hours since their intense encounter in the barn. Her eyes widened as she felt what he couldn’t hide.

“Now?”

Regretfully, he shook his head. “No, not now. I don’t think I would be able to walk if we did.”

Connor held her close for a minute, reveling in the feeling of her heart beating against his, in the closeness they had developed. It was a new sensation to him, one he wasn’t entirely sure of, or comfortable with. She brought out things in him he didn’t know existed, and this cuddly, snuggly stuff was only the tip of it.

For pity’s sake, he’d already told her he loved her. And she hadn’t brought it up or returned the favor. He didn’t want to believe that meant she didn’t feel the same way. No, that couldn’t be it. She was vulnerable and still recovering from a number of emotional blows. When she was ready, she would tell him she loved him.

Connor refused to accept any other scenario.

He leaned back and kissed her forehead, nose and lips. “Now, let’s go get you fed before the wolves start howling in response to your belly.”

Within a few minutes, they left the cabin and walked down the shadowy path to the mess hall. It was a quiet night, with a light breeze that just barely made the leaves whisper. Her hand was warm, tucked against his. Connor didn’t remember the last time he felt so stress free, so relaxed, so content with life.

He didn’t pretend to understand it. Connor usually analyzed everything to pieces before he accepted it, but not in this case. Something told him it was divine intervention that brought Alex back to the ranch, to meet him and become a part of who he was.

Maybe Grant was up there pulling a few strings, trying to make both his biological daughter and the son of his heart happy. In this case, happy together.

It was almost eight thirty by the time they made it to the mess hall and by then it was nearly empty. A few folks were cleaning up the tables and mopping the floors. Connor made a beeline for the kitchen. Knowing Bernice as he did, she would be waiting for him.

He pushed open the door to find her at the stove, her hands on her hips and a scowl on her face.

“It’s about damn time. I was about to send out a search party for you. You know better than to—Alex, is that you?” Bernice craned her neck to see behind Connor.

Alex stepped forward, evidently reluctant to face the older woman’s reaction. Obviously she’d been subject to more than her share of Bernice’s lectures.

“Yep, it’s me.”

“Well, I have both of you problem children, then, don’t I? I can’t believe the mess we had today with people running around like chickens with their heads cut off.” Bernice shook her graying head. “I thought I’d have to smack a few upside the head with my frying pan. You should know better, young lady, than to keep that boy out so long without his mama knowing about it.”

“I know, Bernice. I’ve already apologized to Claire.”

“Claire? I ain’t worried about her. She’s stronger than she looks, even if she likes to cry like a baby herself. No,
I
need an apology. I about worried myself sick about both of you.” Bernice waggled one finger. “In between this one not sleeping or eating and taking people’s noses off with that sharp tongue of his, and you tearing around here like a twister, it’s enough to drive a body to distraction.”

Connor simply let her rant. He used to try to explain himself, but discovered the best method was to simply let her run out of steam. It was far less painful.

“Bernice, I didn’t mean—”

“Oh, the world is full of good intentions. I know you didn’t mean to cause no pain or suffering, or maybe you did. Ain’t my place to judge, but I’ve watched you since you been here. Now, it’s about time to let go of that yoke you’re carrying on your neck and let the past go.” Bernice was building up a good head of steam. Connor smelled the pot roast and gravy and his mouth watered, but he stood there and took his verbal lashing like a good boy.

“I did.”

“And I don’t just mean visiting your father’s grave. I mean—Wait, what did you say?” Bernice stared at Alex and, for the first time since Connor knew her, she was speechless.

“I said I did.” Alex walked toward her, arms outstretched. “I spent the day with Daniel and realized I wasn’t alone in the world. I have family and it’s here at Finley’s. Then, well, then there’s Connor.”

He didn’t know what that meant, but it sure as hell sounded good.

“You—you did?” Bernice’s eyes were suspiciously moist. “Child, I am so proud of you.” She pulled Alex into a bear hug so fierce, he heard a few joints pop. At least he hoped it was joints and not bones.

“Thank you, Bernice.” Alex’s voice was muffled by the bigger woman’s embrace.

“Your mama would be proud too.” Bernice held Alex at arm’s length and met her gaze.

“You know, don’t you? What I did.” Alex was asking her mother’s friend for forgiveness; he heard it in her voice.

“Oh, Alex, of course I knew. She begged me every time I saw her, but I was too much of a coward to help.” Bernice hugged her again. “You are as brave as she was, the spitting image of that woman down to the steel in your spine.”

This time when he gazed at Alex’s face, the relief and joy he saw there made his throat tighten up. She had done what she could for her dying mother, had carried the burden of the guilt for so long, and was now able to set it aside. He hoped that meant she’d be staying at the ranch, staying in his life, for good.

“Can we eat now? I’m starving.” His voice sounded husky and he wondered if they noticed.

“Typical man. There are only two parts of the body a man thinks with, and neither of them is on his shoulders.” Bernice wiped her eyes with her apron and let out a huge sigh. “I made pot roast, so sit down at the corner table there and I’ll serve up some for you. Connor, get you both a drink from the refrigerator.”

He did as he was bade and came back with two cold beers. Alex took one with a grateful expression and took a long tug from the bottle. Connor sat down and did the same.

Bernice came over with two heaping plates of pot roast with gravy, potatoes, carrots and biscuits. Connor was hungrier than he’d been in months, maybe even years. They grinned at each other over the mountain of food.

“Well, whatcha waiting on? Dig in so I can get my old bones to bed tonight. Lord, what you children put me through.” Bernice mumbled to herself as she went back to the stove and started clearing away the dishes she’d saved the food in for them.

As he dug into the delicious meal, he glanced up at Alex. She hadn’t moved, or picked up her fork. He frowned, asking her without words what was wrong.

“Nothing’s wrong. Don’t worry. I’m just, well, I’m embarrassed to admit that I’m happy.” She looked down at her plate. “I used to ignore the world around me, figuring nothing would ever touch me again. And I can’t believe how different my life was a month ago. It sounds corny, but I’m glad to be sitting here in the mess hall kitchen eating with you.”

“It’s not corny at all. I’m pretty lucky too.” He looked into her blue eyes and saw the future shining back at him. Before he said something stupid again, like tell her he loved her, he smiled. “I mean, Bernice never lets me eat back here.”

Alex laughed and started eating. Connor ate with the knowledge they would have that conversation soon, but just not then. It had been too intense already and it was only Monday.

“
I
really do need to speak with you, Alex. It’s quite urgent.” James’s normally smooth voice sounded off, as if he were in trouble. It wasn’t Alex’s business, of course, but he’d called her again.

Her tiny office was cozy and it had become her little hidey-hole. As soon as they hooked up the phone and somehow shoehorned in the filing cabinet, she was content with her little cave.

She leaned back in the chair and stared at the ceiling. “Can’t we just talk on the phone? I’m working.”

“Working? You’re working at the ranch?” He sounded incredulous.

“I do have a brain, James, as well as accounting experience. I’m taking over the books.”

The silence that followed her statement was uncomfortable to say the least. It was as if the air on the phone had gotten charged with a bolt of lightning.

“I hadn’t realized you were doing anything at the ranch besides riding and living there.” James’s tone had changed but she couldn’t put her finger on exactly what it had changed to.

“I can’t just do nothing. I’ve worked for years and don’t consider myself a woman of leisure, even if I own half a guest ranch.” It sounded good to say that out loud. She didn’t quite have the half ownership yet, but if she stayed there another eleven months, it would be hers.

“I can understand that. I respect hard work and a strong work ethic. You obviously have both.” He was petting her with words again.

“Cut the shit, James. What do you want?” She was tired of being manipulated by the man.

“There’s something that’s come to my attention and I must speak to you in person about it. Please, Alex. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”

She believed he would but that was beside the point. It was four in the afternoon on a Friday and Connor hadn’t said anything about evening plans. Alex could meet with James and then perhaps have dinner with Connor. In the VIP cabin.

“Fine, but I’ve only got an hour. Do you want to drive over here or meet in town?”

“Thank you, Alex, thank you. Why don’t I drive over there again? We can meet in the parking lot as we did before.” He truly did sound grateful, no matter what bullshit he was peddling.

Alex was going to tell him for certain there was no possibility she would sell her half of Finley’s ranch. In the last month, it had become evident she belonged there; the land was in her blood, her heart and her soul. James would just have to recognize he wouldn’t be able to annex the land.

“I’ll be there in fifteen minutes. It looks like it’s snowing so I won’t stay long.” With that he was gone.

Alex stood and shut down her laptop, eager to find Connor to discuss their plans. The idea they could have dinner together, perhaps in bed, was more than appealing. Food play was on her list of things to try one day. With a snowy, chilly night ahead, it was the perfect time.

She smiled as she walked down the hallway, amazed to find herself feeling happy. Who knew how much coming home would mean to her? She peeked in the door of Connor’s office but it was dark and empty.

With only a small pout, she went back to her office to get her coat, hat and gloves. The air was beyond cold after the sun went down. The crispness of the morning air could make her nose hairs freeze; at night it made her lips blue. Strangely enough, she had missed that frigid taste in the air in California.

Fifteen minutes later, she peered out the window from the main office, waiting for James. In the pit of her stomach she was a little nervous and couldn’t explain exactly why. He’d been a gentleman most of the time, except of course when he tried to grope her. And the time he punched her out.

An outsider might think she’d lost her mind by agreeing to meet with him. However to Alex this was the final time she was going to see him, a last farewell. They might run into each other in town—after all, Lobos was quite small—but she didn’t intend on seeing him outside of casual contact again.

Connor would be happy about that, but she wasn’t doing it for him. James almost represented the life she used to lead, the meaningless existence where she’d floated around like a cloud in the sky. She’d been pushed by the wind to move this way and that, unable to get herself on the ground and steer her own destiny.

Wyoming had rescued her from that nebulous life, and James was the means for her to say good-bye to it, to David, to all she’d hidden behind for ten years. Put in perspective, this was a monumental parting of the ways.

Feeling stronger, Alex successfully squashed any nervousness she felt. She saw the black Lexus pull up and headed for the door. Claire was just walking in, her nose red from the cold air. She looked behind her and saw the car, then frowned at Alex.

“Where are you going, Alex?”

“I’m just talking to him, Claire.” Alex buttoned her coat, waiting for her stepmother to read her the riot act, or at least disapprove. She did neither. “You’re not going to tell me I’m nuts? Or that I shouldn’t be consorting with the enemy?”

Claire unwrapped the scarf from around her head. “No, that’s not my business, of course. You’re a grown woman with a mind of your own. I wouldn’t think you had any intention of listening to me anyway. You have that in common with your father.”