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Authors: Bathroom Readers' Institute

Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores

BOOK: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores
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The Bathroom Readers' Institute

Ashland, Oregon, and San Diego, California

UNCLE JOHN'S BATHROOM READER SHOOTS AND SCORES UPDATED & EXPANDED

Copyright © 2011 by Portable Press. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

“Bathroom Reader,” “Portable Press,” and “Bathroom Readers' Institute” are registered trademarks of Baker & Taylor, Inc. All rights reserved.

For information, write…
The Bathroom Readers' Institute
P.O. Box 1117, Ashland, OR 97520
www.bathroomreader.com
e-mail:
[email protected]

Page 321: Earliest known photograph of women's hockey (Isobel Stanley, Lord Stanley's daughter, is in white). Rideau Hall, Ottawa, Canada (circa 1890). Source: Library and Archives Canada/
Proud past, bright future: one hundred years of Canadian women's hockey
/AMICUS 13669816/Page 6/nlc-5953

eISBN: 978-1-60710-652-4

E-book edition: June 2012

CONGRATULATIONS!

The Bathroom Readers' Institute would like to congratulate the members of the BRI AllStar Shinny Team for their tremendous effort and great sportsmanship, and for making this book possible.

THE “WRITE” LINE

The journalists and writers who scouted the rinks and went into overtime in their quest for the most interesting hockey facts and stories.

Frank “Faster than Bobby” Orr (Captain) — Center
Mark “The Fog” Weisenmiller — Right Wing
Rob “Emmy” Adler — Left Wing
Kevin “Pappa” Woodley — Defense
Lucas “Barbershop” Aykroyd — Defense
Jeff “The Human Highlight Film” Rud — Rover
Adam “Suitcase” Schroeder — Goalie
Sue “Sweet Feet” Steiner — Goalie
Thom “Too Tall” Little — Enforcer
Derek “The Impossiblist” Fairbridge — Team Hypnotherapist

 

BEHIND THE BENCH

The editors and designers who pulled the team together and made a book out of it.

Silas “Roadrunner” White — Assistant Coach
Alexandra “The Hammer” Wilson — Equipment Manager
Teresa “Boom Boom” Bubela — General Manager
Michael “Miracle” Brunsfeld — Team Mascot

AND THANK YOU!

To everyone else behind the scenes who helped pull together this “miracle on ice.”

Gordon Javna

JoAnn Padgett

Melinda Allman

Amy Miller

Jay Newman

Monica Maestas

Annie Lam

Ginger Winters

Jennifer Frederick

Sydney Stanley

Gary Lloyd

Michelle Benjamin

Jennifer Thornton

Jennifer Browning

Mana Monzavi

Dylan Drake

Antonia Banyard

Cindy Connor

Jamie Broadhurst

Paddy Laidley

Sandy Cooper

Pete MacDougall

John Sawyer

Danielle Johnson

Tom “Dijon” Mustard

All our great friends at Raincoast

Duncan McCallum and Friesens

Sophie and JJ

Publishers Group West

And special greetings to Allan “the Godfather” MacDougall

* * * * *

DID YOU KNOW?

In 2000, the year of his death, Maurice “Rocket” Richard became the only NHL player to have his number honored in a professional sport other than hockey. For the entire season that year, the Montreal Expos honored Richard's memory by wearing his iconic #9 on the sleeves of their uniforms.

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

UNCLE JOHN'S EARLY YEARS OF HOCKEY

Where It All Began

Miner League Hockey?

The Real Millionaires

From Renfrew to Replays

Hockey in the Trenches

Hockey Hero

When Hockey Trumped Hitler

First Photo

THOSE OTHER LEAGUES

Down in the Eh, Eh?

The 10-Cent-Beer-Night Caper!!

The “Other” Big League

Jet-Propelled Oilers

Their Cup Runneth Over

Other NHLs

On the Table

THE GREATS

The Fabulous Nines

Hockey's First Olympic MVP

Brothers-In-Twine

Béliveau Says No

Crossover Artists

Direct Lines

1987: Pure Heaven

Red

Bobby Orr of Hockey Lore

The Great Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Hockey Quiz

The First Great Draft

The Great One

The Many Sides of Tie

Defining Moment in Hockey

LAW & ORDER

The Richard Riot

Injured, Weirdly

Legendary Meltdowns

The Men in Stripes

The Green-Maki Stick Fight

The Bodyguard

THE RECORD BOOK

Medical Records

And the Award Goes To…

The Versatile Dit

A Young Man's Game

Sophomore Jinx

Hockey Goes to Hollywood

A Novel Game

Vital Statistics

Keep It in the Family

The Long and Short of It

THE ROAD TO THE CUP

Stanley Cup Strata

Models of Consistency

The Longest Road Trip

Big, Bad, and Broad

Draft Day Drama

Lengthy Stays on the Throne

Best in the Crunch

Hold That Tiger

OFF-ICE PERSONALITIES

Was the Major a Kernel?

He Shoots! He Scores!

Losing with Pizzazz

Best Behind the Bench

Jolly Jack?

Gallivan-ting

Doughnut Disaster

The Legend of Taro Tsujimoto

Irrepressible Roger

THE CHARACTERS

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Rink

The Vanished Leaf

Eddie, You're Out!

Tiger Talk

Eddie Shore's Wild Ride

A Boy and His Dog

Buzzer Beaters

Winner's Heart in A Comedian's Body

All Bets Are Off

Those Nutty Netminders

The Fabulous Fatman

Clear the Track!

The Noble Goalie

Father Hockey

UNSUNG PIONEERS OF THE GAME

Hockey's Color Change

Stay-at-Home Czechs and Russians

The Founding Father of Modern-Day Goaltending

Skirts and Slapshots

The Flying Fem Finn

Europe Invades

Shattering the Ice Ceiling

The Stylish Swede

More Than Just a Game

Pioneer on Ice

THE WORLD STAGE

Goal(s) Heard 'Round the World

A Woman's Game

The Big Red Machine

Wild at the World Hockey Championships

Miracle on Ice

Sinden's Thoughts on
Glasnost

BLOOPERS & MISCUES

Engraving Errors

Don't Bother to Knock

Brief Tour of Duty

Don't Mention That Trade

When You Gotta Go

Million Dollar “M”

So Be Good, for Goodness Sake!

Things Not to Say to the Boss' Wife

May the Best Man Win

ACCESSORIES OF HOCKEY

A Numbers Game

N-H-L-Mets

How to Make Ice

The Masked Marvel

A Tale of Two Blockers

Masked Messages

Z Is for Zamboni

Equipment Pioneers

How to Make a Hockey Puck

Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Puck

How to Marry a Millionaire

Hairy Times in Hockey

UNDERDOGS, UNDERACHIEVERS, & UNLIKELY HEROES

Little Big Men

Hero for a Game

Hey Kid! Suit Up!

Their 15 Minutes

Sieves and Swiss Cheese

Rare Jewel and a King

What Ever Happened To…?

CEREMONIES & SUPERSTITIONS

You Are Getting Sleepy, Very Sleepy

Very Superstitious

Curse of Muldoon

Animal Icecapades

The Battle of Alberta

Are All Goalies Crackpots?

The Incredible Goodbyes

MIXED BAG

The Name Game

Donors v. Recipients

Hockey? Good Grief

Slap Shot Science

8 Places to Sk8 Before You Die

Stick Action (Off the Ice)

Nude Hockey News

Weird Hockey News

THE BUSINESS OF HOCKEY

The House That Smythe Built

Rise of the Union

Morenz Money, Not More Money

Owners of the Game

It's All About the Game…Or Is It?

The Labor Front

BOOK: Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Shoots and Scores
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