Undead L.A. 1 (27 page)

“
I'm just saying that it doesn't matter if I get killed in the riots with Doogie Howser, or if I die in a hospital bed in Tacoma General Hospital.”

“
It matters to me,” her mother said, tearing up. “It matters more than you will ever know. I wanna be there with you.
You are my baby
.”

“
Mom, stop.”

“
I was there from the beginning and I plan on being there until the end. You hear me? So it matters very much to me.”

“
I'm coming back, Mom. I promise.”

“
You’d better,” her mother said, wiping away a fresh burst of tears and laughing. “If you do go and die on me in God-forsaken Los Angeles, I will never forgive you.”

She turned and walked out of the room. It was the last conversation they ever had.

The weather was warm, even in September, due to the Santa Ana winds.

Living Dreams flew her out and put her up at the JW Marriot the night before the event. She'd had a big plan to convince them to bring her out early because of her condition. While it was true that she normally ran out of energy without warning, it was also just a ruse to buy her extra time in the City of Angels. She'd decided to really
see
Los Angeles, to do all the cool things she'd never done when she lived there before because they were too touristy.

Living Dreams seemed to understand this without her having to say anything at all. They sent out one of their top people, Sean Hopewell, a fulltime employee who'd joined the non-profit after years of working for the Peace Corps. He was a simple, easygoing companion who was ready on a moment's notice to lend a helping hand, or even just to listen. It was as if nothing in the world made him happier than to make her happy.

Sean helped her pull her luggage out of the carousel. There was even a driver holding a sign while waiting for them, just like she was a celebrity. He also insisted on loading her bags into the back of his Pruis. Once they were buckled in and heading out the driver introduced himself as Carl.

“
I'm going to be driving you around while you are here. All you have to do is let Sean know everything in the city you'd like to see. But first I am taking you to your hotel so you can get checked in. It's a short drive to Downtown. Traffic is not too bad this time of night. We should be there in less than thirty minutes, so sit back and enjoy the ride.”

“
I didn't know there were eco-friendly car services. Are there more drivers using Prius's now, or are you the first?”

“
There are others now, and some cab companies as well, but this company was the first to really jump in with both feet,” Carl smiled. “Started back in 2010 with taking a bunch of celebrities to the Oscars. Since then the demand for green rides has expanded to include a number of Fortune 500 clients. We run a fleet of twenty-five and we are constantly booked.”

“
That's amazing! I mean on the one hand it sounds like something people would make fun of about Hollywood, right? You know what I mean?”

Carl smiled the same kind way Sean had when they first met. It was as if they were willing to indulge any slight she offered them.

It's amazing just how nice people treat you when they know you're going to die
, she thought.

And why shouldn't they? After all, she was a condemned woman with one foot in the grave. What point would there be to argue with her? She'd be gone and forgotten in less than a year, cremated and thrown out into her beloved Puget Sound so that her ashes could mix with the marine life. She imagined killer whales and dolphins breathing her in. For some reason it always made her feel calm.

“But this isn't like a Prius you can just buy at the dealership,” Carl continued as he merged into the right lane to the sound of angry honking, and looped onto the 105 Freeway. “These babies use the most advanced hybrid and alternative fuel vehicles in the world. We've even got solar, which is perfect for L.A.”

“
Because it never rains in Southern California?” She smiled as she asked her rhetorical question, thinking of the song's melody she was quoting. Carl smiled genially back at her.

“
You got it!”

“
Thank you, Carl,” she said. “Can we have some music?”

“
Sure thing, Kathleen,” he said, switching on the stereo. “Let me know when you hear something you like.”

“
KROQ will be fine,” she offered. He hit the preset for 106.7 and a new song came on, the singer crying out soulfully, “…this is it, the apocalypse.” She smiled and relaxed back into the soft leather seats. She watched out the window as they connected to the 110 via a huge, looping overpass, giving her a bird's eye view of Downtown in the distance. There wasn't much to see from there until they passed under the 10 Freeway, coming out to the breathtaking sight of the LA Convention Center and the monolithic JW Marriot towering over the freeway like a modern day obelisk. Downtown Los Angeles had changed in her absence. A renaissance had swept through the area in the form of money and new construction, reclaiming the once blighted streets and transforming them into a playground full of sound and light and color. There was a huge billboard painted on the side of one of the new buildings that advertised Coke, with two sexy young models in bikinis holding surfboards and drinking from glass bottles. There was a multiplex with shops and eateries. Happy shoppers and moviegoers blithely swarmed through the streets like pedestrians in New York. Kathleen gawked in amazement at how this one sketchy area was now teeming with foot traffic – a resurrected commercial wonderland. She touched her fingers lightly to the window in amazement.

What else will change after I am gone? Perhaps the whole world will be reinvented when I am no longer here.

After she had checked in, ordered room service, taken a bath, eaten, taken her medicine and routinely thrown up, she called Sean.

“
I'd like to go out,” she said.

“
You sure you're not too tired?”

“
I'm sure,” she countered. “I took some Oxy. I should be good for a few hours at least.”

“
I will let Carl know,” Sean said in a happy tone. “How far are we going?”

“
Just around the area,” she said, glad to hear he didn't plan on trying to talk her out of an evening adventure. Both Sea and her mother had taken to coddling her by that point. It was endearing and yet frustrating, but she understood. She didn't have time for that now. It didn't matter if she was tired or if she felt sick. This was her last chance to drink in the sights before the sickness fully confined her to a bed and then pulled her into the darkness.

“
Meet me in the lobby in thirty?”

“
Can we make it fifteen?”

“
I'll be there waiting for you,” Sean agreed, and hung up.

True to his word, he was there twelve minutes later when she came down in an evening dress. Carl picked them up out front and she told him to head north toward the Westin Bonaventure Hotel. Carl had them there in under five minutes, pulling up in front of the lobby where three sad, tattered looking, formerly white flags were buffeted back and forth by the gusts from the nearby freeway interchange.

“You two have fun up at that rotating bar,” Carl said.

“
How'd you know?”

“
Why else would you be here?”

“
We won't be long,” she said quickly. “I was hoping to make a second stop afterward.”

“
Take as long as you need,” Carl said with a wave of his hand. “I'll be here waiting when you get back.”

They rode in silence up the glass elevators. Sean had swapped his Land's End khakis and J. Crew men’s polo shirt for a simple black button up with matching slacks. His shoes looked well worn but polished. She wondered for a moment if these were the only nice dress clothes he had. He didn't wear jewelry, not a wedding ring or a wristwatch or even a necklace. He looked simply content to be there, as if she was doing him the favor by taking him out for the night.

“Thank you for coming out with me,” she said, watching the traffic pass by on the freeway below and realizing people in the cars could see her as well. She felt like Willy Wonka for a moment.

“
Thank you for inviting me,” he said. “I've always wanted to check this place out but never have.”

“
Me too,” she said with a smile.

They reached the 35
th
floor and stepped out, walking to the rotating sky bar where they were promptly greeted by a short man in a suit who cheerfully led them to their seats. An attentive waiter brought them drinks from the simple menu and they stared out of the windows as they made small talk, savoring the incredible view outside as it passed by. Kathleen felt queasy at first, the shifting view and moving floor giving her a sense of vertigo. It quickly passed after she learned to turn her attention back to her date. She'd ordered a Lemon Drop but didn't make it through, the taste reminding her too much of the lemon swabs she'd used to soothe the sores in her mouth after her last round of chemo.

When she'd finally had enough, they flagged down their server. Sean insisted on paying, and she let him. Afterward she had Carl drive them over to West 2
nd
past Spring Street, by the old police department. There they went through a back alley to a famous bar called the Edison, a steampunk gin joint located in the basement of the Higgins Building that had come into vogue shortly after opening in 2007. It took some convincing to get Sean in since there was a strict dress code, but the doorman finally relented when Kathleen explained he was her chaperone and she was dying of cancer.

Cancer works as an excuse for nearly everything
, she thought as they moved into the dark bar.
I wish I would have known sooner. I could have done something with this 'Get Out of Jail Free Card' before I lost all of my strength.

She ordered Absinth this time and took sips, not knowing how the strong liquor would interact with her medication. They served it to her in a cup with a flaming sugar cube, just like she'd seen in the movies. She watched the young urban professionals crowd into the bar, smiling and laughing as they sipped drinks from the turn of the century where the city's first power plant once stood. There was a natural order to the way they flirted, bragged, and even toasted one another. It was as if every movement conveyed their sense of upwardly mobile purpose. They were the future and they knew it. She was an interloper, slipping among them unseen but not blending in.

Sean didn't fit in either. He looked worn and unpolished next to the overly groomed men. They were neat and hairless and tan. He was unkempt with a simple hair cut and scruffy facial hair growing in wispy patches on his boyish face. They were trying to stand out, to show their status and power, to grab other people's attention. Sean seemed to radiate calmness. His simple clothing and humble attitude belied the enormous kindness of his easy smile and sparkling eyes. There was an unspoken power hidden just beneath the surface, like a deep strong current unseen from the top of the water, that didn't need advertising. It was almost as if he was left untouched by the world around him as he casually moved through it.

Still, when the time came to go back to the hotel, he looked visibly relieved. She thought he might come back to her room but he got off on his own floor instead, dashing her hopes. She thought for a moment about inviting him up, but then reconsidered. As much as it would be wonderful to have sex again, she knew it would only bring on more complications she didn't need. She fell asleep in her evening clothes, barely managing to pull the covers over her. She dreamed about being an animal in the forest, running as fast as she could while all around her young animals tried to rip her flesh apart.

The next day when she woke up she didn't know where she was.

She showered and drank a protein shake she'd brought with her to give her strength. It was going to be a long day. Once more she called Sean and had him meet her downstairs.

She had Carl take them to Chinatown for
dim sum
. They were seated quickly and she ordered sticky pork buns from a passing cart, picking at them as she drank green tea boba. Sean got into the spirit and soon the table was full of plates of half-eaten food. They paid the bill and wandered around for a bit, stopping at the tiny shops to buy gifts for Sea and her mom. Sean took her picture near the wishing well and with the Bruce Lee statue behind Hop Louie’s in the square. She bought a colorful paper umbrella and used it shade her from the sun's unrelenting glare. She'd forgotten how bright it was all the time in L.A.

Coming up Broadway toward Cesar Chavez on the way back to the hotel they passed under the double golden dragons. In the distance she could see City Hall. A few moments later, Carl drove them past the iconic Walt Disney concert hall. She stared in wonder at the smooth curves of the famous structure. Carl took the scenic route on his way back to the 101 Freeway toward Hollywood, pointing out the famous sign on the hill. She'd forgotten how bad traffic was; they lost a lot of time sitting in it. Kathleen amused herself with people watching. She was surprised by how distracted the drivers around them were, texting and talking on the phone and spacing out. One car they passed had an old woman with a large beauty mirror plucking the hairs on her chin as she inched forward in traffic. In another, a teenaged Asian girl put on eyeliner in the moving vehicle using her rear view mirror.