Undefeated - A New Adult Romance Novel (15 page)

KACE.
What we try to remember and what we prefer to forget. Our mind doesn’t always have an understanding of how we want these things sorted. Sometimes a simple memory can be enough to defeat even the toughest soul.

Acceptance of these memories
as being in the past, and understanding that they are nothing more than a reminder can often allow us to continue through our current life without feeling guilt, sorrow, or shame. Not accepting them as such can allow us to be overcome by the emotion associated with the memory.

“Shane, baby, you fell asleep,” I said as I tugged on his arm.

He pulled his arm away from me and pressed his hood against his face.

“Baby?” I said softly as I bent down toward his face.

He pulled against the sides of his hood and looked out of the opening.

“Oh,” he paused and looked around the room.

“Sorry,” he said as he sat up in the chair.

“I must have fallen asleep,” he apologized as he pulled his hood from his face.

He face was covered in sweat.

“It’s hot in here, baby. You shouldn’t wear your hoodie,” I said as I leaned into the chair to kiss him.

“Where’s your mother?” he asked as he looked around the room.

I steadied his face with my hands and looked into his eyes, “She is making lunch for us,” I said as I pressed my lips against his.

As if the kiss woke him up totally, he held me in his arms and kissed me deeply. “Kace, you mean the world to me,” he said.

“You mean the world to me,” I responded.

“No, I mean. Well, fuck. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. I just. I don’t know. I want to spend the rest of my life being everything you want in a man. I want to make up for your lifetime of what you haven’t received. I want to always be here for you. I want so much for you to be happy,” he said.

“What got into you? I am happy,” I responded.

“An entirely different degree of happy,” he said as he stood up and pulled his hoodie off.

“Okay,” I said, “sounds good.”

He looked around the room as he tossed his hoodie on the back of the chair. He rubbed his eyes and turned to focus on my face. Slowly, he smiled.

“How long was I out?” he asked.

“I don’t know. We talked a while. I heard you snore after a bit. But we just decided to leave you. I thought you were worn out from all of the training for the fight. Is that okay?” I asked.

“
No, babe. It’s fine,” he said as he stretched his arms behind his back.

“While she’s cooking, you wanna look at some stuff with me?” I asked excitedly.

“Sure, what do ya got?” he asked as he rubbed his hands together.

“Well, mom said she had all my stuff from when I was in high school in a room. She saved everything. I want to go look at it. I might want to take a few things home,”
I giggled as I rubbed my hands together jokingly.

As we both stood and rubbed our hands together, I got excited. Excited to see things I hadn’t seen in ten years. Things I had long since forgotten. These old memories were going to be nice to sift and sort through. Not knowing what I would encounter was exciting. I tried to recall what she might have set aside, and the excitement almost overcame me.

“Well?” I asked.

“Let’s go,” he said.

“Mom, we’re going to go snoop,” I screamed into the kitchen.

“Okay, have fun. There’s a foot locker beside the bed,” a shallow voice responded.

I opened the door and Shane and I stepped inside. Immediately, I felt a wave of heat come over me. I began to shake lightly.

My Hello Kitty comforter on the bed. I snuggled under that comforter forever. Josh and I first…

Fucking Josh.

I turned and looked at the wall. All of my medals from running in track
were on the wall in a shadow box. My throat felt full, and a lump rose as I walked to the box. Newspaper clippings were framed on each side of the display. I walked toward the framed pages and looked at the dates.

“Oh my God. This was my senior year - after I left. She kept them, Shane. She kept them,” I said as I pointed at the framed articles.

Several of the articles were for first place running in long distance. I always liked running, it allowed me to clear my head. The habit of running has stuck with me and become one of the few things I now look forward to. A five mile run will clear my mind like nothing else can. I turned and looked at Shane.

“Fun, huh?” he said as he looked around the room at my things.

It was truly a step back in time, and rather overwhelming. I gazed at the foot of the bed, and wondered what was in the locker on the floor beside the foot of the bed. I knelt down beside it and placed my hands on top of the locker.

“Come here, babe. Let’s see what’s in here,” I said, pointing to the locker.

I placed both of my hands on the top of the lid.

Shane knelt down beside me and sat cross legged on the floor.
He turned, put his arm around my shoulder, and pulled me close to him. As I leaned into his shoulder, he kissed me softly on the lips. I pressed my thumbs under the top of the lid as he kissed me.

“Babe, I’m so glad we
’re here,” he said as our lips parted.

“So am I,” I responded as I took a deep breath.

He turned and looked at the locker as I opened the lid. A musty smell came out as it opened. My dresses, my shirts, my pants, my skirts - all folded nicely. I turned and looked at Shane, excited to see all of these things that I hadn’t seen in ten or more years. The rush of emotion was filling me.

“Babe, look,” I said as I sorted through the articles of clothing.

I picked up a dress from my sophomore year in school and smelled it. Holding it in my arms, I turned toward Shane. He gazed into the foot locker and rubbed his dog tags frantically with his right hand.

Something’s wrong.

His lip was quivering.

“Babe,” I said softly.

He started to stand, his hand under his shirt on his dog tags.

“Babe,” I said as I stood up.

Something’s bad wrong.

I heard a
snap.

His hand came out from under his shirt, holding the broken chain in his hand. He turned and looked at me as if
he were in a trance.

And a
s the dog tags fell from his hand, Shane Dekkar collapsed into a lifeless pile on the floor.

KACE.
Having what we hold dear to our heart pulled from our grasp puts things - all things - in perspective. Not knowing when or if the object we love will be returned allows us to truly understand just exactly how deeply that object is embedded in our life.

“I need to know what’s going on,” I begged.

“I’m sorry ma’am. You’ll just have to wait until someone can see you,” the nurse responded.

“Is there someone else I can talk to?” I asked frantically.

“No. There is no one else. I’ll have a doctor come see you as soon as someone knows something,” she said over the top of the nurse’s station.

I put my hands on my hips, looked down at the floor, and wanted to cry. I refused to become weak. I needed to be strong for Shane. I looked up and down the hallway as I saw someone come running toward me. Thank God.

Ripp.

I held my arms out in front of me and flapped my hands.

As he picked me up from the floor and into his arms, I felt comfortable that I was not alone. I felt so helpless and
incapable up until now. He hugged me and let me back down onto the floor.

“I got here as soon as I got the voicemail. You didn’t answer your phone,” he gasped for breath as he spoke.

My eyes began to well with tears.

“What happened?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” I began to cry.

I wiped my eyes and took a breath, “He just. He. We were in my mother’s new house. We started looking at stuff. He just woke up from a nap. He seemed weird. But he stood up, and pulled his dog tags off. And then he collapsed. When the ambulance got here, he was,” I started crying and couldn’t continue.

“It’s okay Shorty. I’m here until they release him. So, what happened when the ambulance came?” Ripp asked as he hugged me lightly.

I thought about what Shane was doing and I began to tremble, “He was just in a ball on the floor. Like he was…”

“Uhhm, like his brain didn’t work anymore. He didn’t blink or talk or anything,” I sobbed.

“Oh.
Fuck. What are they saying now?” he asked as he released me and wiped the tears from my face.

“Nothing. She won’t tell me anything,
” I said as I pointed to the nurse’s station.

“Stand over there,” he said as he
motioned to the other side of the hallway.

Confused, I stepped to the other side of the hallway
, leaned on the wall, and watched Ripp. Dressed in his cargo shorts, sneakers, and a tank top, he was rather intimidating to those that didn’t know him. He turned to the nurse’s station, took a breath, and started talking. His voice was very matter-of-fact and direct.

“I’m Mike Dekkar, Shane’s brother. I need to know what his status i
s. He was brought in by ambulance,” he said to the nurse as he leaned onto the top tier of the station.

The nurse took a breath, sighed, and looked up at Ripp.

“Sir, I told his wife a moment ago –
I don’t know
. If you’d like to go wait in the waiting room, I’ll have you an answer in a little while. I’ll have someone come see you in a bit,” as she finished speaking she looked back down at her keyboard.

Ripp
sharply knocked on the countertop with is knuckles three times to get the nurses attention. As she looked up, annoyed, Ripp started again.

“Listen, I don’t have
a little while
. I have about this much patience,” he held his hand in the air and snapped his fingers loudly.

“Look at me,” he said as he stepped back away from the raised counter. He pointed at himself from head to toe.
His arm, neck, and leg muscles rippled as he pointed his finger up and down his toward his body.

“Do I look like a guy that you want to piss off?” he st
epped back toward the counter, leaned against it, and flexed his chest muscles.

“This mother fucker is
full
of doctors.
Find one
. Go find one and get him to go find my brother. And then find out what the fucking deal is, or I’m going to start knocking mother fuckers out,” he whispered loudly.

He turned his head from side-to-side, looking down the hallway, and turned back toward the nurse, “Cold.”

She looked up into Ripp’s eyes, “Sir, I will call security,” she said as she put her hand on the phone at the lower desk.

“Call ‘em.
Fuck yes,” he rubbed his hands together.

“
Call ‘em. I’ll knock them the fuck out too. It’s what I do. I knock motherfuckers out. Cold. Call security, and while you’re at it call the cops. Tell ‘em to send S.W.A.T., because I hate fucking cops,” he was starting to become a little louder and was having a difficult time whispering.

“Your best bet is this – find out what the deal is. In the next ten minutes. We’ll be in the waiting room,” he pushed himself from the countertop and squinted his eyes.

“C’mon, Shorty,” he said as he held out his right hand.

I leaned away from the wall and stepped toward him.

“Why’d you make me stand over there?” I asked as I reached for his hand.

“I didn’t want you to get any debris on you if I started breaking shit,” he said as we walked down the hallway toward the waiting room.

“Ripp?” his hand in mine, I looked up toward his face.

“Yeah, Shorty,” he responded as he angrily stomped his way toward the waiting room.

I needed comfort, reassurance, and some form of confirmation that everything was going to be alright – including me. I felt all jumbled up inside. The man I loved dearly was in the trauma unit in the hospital and I didn’t know what was wrong or how to fix it.

“I love you,” I said, still holding his hand in mine.

He stopped walking, turned, and looked at me, “Shorty, I love you too. You’re my brother’s girl. Any time he’s gone, I gotta take care of ya. It’s just how we do it here in Texas.”

And he started walking again.

How we do it here in Texas.

Knocking motherfuckers
out.

Cold.