Under an Onyx Sky (Elemental Enchanters Series Book 4) (22 page)

She felt his warm breath on her neck, and her heart pounded with anticipation, but she felt guilty. Gabriel didn’t know that forever was such a short time away. She had to tell him. But how? Wouldn’t he be better off thinking she just died in the war? Did he really need to know she was destined to die?

It was raining hard when the Elementals, Xavier, Link, Nicole, and Anais arrived in London. It was the home and birthplace of so many of their friends and family. There was so much history, but Havok wanted it all gone. All traces of Ephemeral life deleted.

But hadn’t Enchanters lived there? Or did the only ones Havok cared about reside in Caprington? She had dreaded coming to London. Another massacre. Another death toll added to her list. Knowing she would die when it was over only helped a little. But Ava promised herself that this was the last Ephemeral massacre. She would take no part any more. They had to work fast before Havok announced the next one.

If only Xavier knew the truth, they could’ve gone back to Havok and lied. At least, Ava told herself that once Xavier knew the truth, he would immediately side with her. But who was she kidding? Friendly Xavier or not, he could turn on a dime and report her to Havok, and then their minds would really be erased.

All along the way to London, Ava struggled with whether or not to kill Xavier. She didn’t want to kill him, which she hated. She needed to remember him as he really was. Cruel, callous, and selfish.

But if she did kill him, it would mess up the entire plan. She didn’t know where the Hunters hid, and she couldn’t get word to them fast enough. She could only hope Anais had worked on some of the Cimmerians to bring them to their side.

Anxiety filled Ava once they reached the door. She was afraid to turn off her humanity, because she didn’t know if she could turn it back on. But she didn’t have time to worry.

Ava took a deep breath and let the stone consume her heart once more.

Xavier gave a signal, and Gillian stepped forward. The ground began to shake. Link hurled bombs toward the beautiful city, which exploded in the night. Thomas trailed fireballs after the bombs. Jeremy created several tornados and sent them twirling down the streets whipping up cars, people, and debris. Melissa sent boulders. Ava forced the water from the Thames River, building it higher and higher. Then, she made the water crash along the shore, knocking out building after building. Nicole shot ice from her hands, freezing people mid-scream. Anais wrapped her electric blue ropes around the Ephemerals.

The screams from the people had no effect on Ava.

They moved toward the city to continue the destruction. Ava shot water at the Ephemerals all along her path. The river swelled like a violent ocean in a hurricane. The water rose, churning into a tidal wave. When she let go, the ground shook again from the impact. The army stood back, watching, making sure every soul died.

“Let’s go,” Xavier said, and opened the door.

They walked through and as usual were quiet as they started walking. The shuffling of their footsteps on the concrete was the only sound.

Xavier stared at the ground, biting his lip.

“Are you okay?” Ava asked.

“I’m fine,” he snapped. Maybe he had turned off his emotions.

She grabbed his arm lightly, and they stopped behind the group. “You don’t have to pretend with me.”

He narrowed his dark eyes at her, seeming to struggle with something. A frustrated look contorted his face, and he crossed his arms. “We should go.” He left her standing alone as he caught up to the rest of the group.

Ava let out an angry sigh. How was she supposed to explain anything to him, when he clearly still obeyed Havok? He frustrated her so much. Getting him to side with them seemed like an impossible mission. She couldn’t figure him out. And she had no other tactic than to tell him everything. She had no choice. She had to get him on their side. He was the key to convincing other Cimmerians to switch. Tomorrow she would tell him the truth. Whether it killed her or not.

Ava walked beside Xavier along the rocky shore of the village, wanting to be with Gabriel instead. She wondered what Gabriel and Eve were doing, but then her stomach twisted into knots at the thought. What if she kissed him? Would he kiss her back? She couldn’t worry about it, but it still crossed her mind.

The sun was sinking low into the horizon, but it left a faded orange hue speckled across the sky. The air had gotten warmer, but Ava missed the humid nights back at home. Swimming with her friends or watching baseball games with her father. She missed all of it. But she couldn’t think about it too much since she would never experience it again.

Xavier slid his clammy hand inside hers, which startled her. Ava wanted to let go, but she needed him on her side. She felt like she was betraying herself just for holding his hand.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“I’m fine. You?”

“Yeah. Great. Wonderful.” She heard the sarcasm in his voice.

“What is it?”

The muscle in his jaw twitched, and he released her hand. Running his hands over his blond hair, he shook his head. “This is ridiculous.”

“What is? I’m sorry I’m—.”

He turned back to her, and stared into her eyes. “It’s not you. Really. We’ve spent so much time hating each other because the Elders brainwashed you from day one. You’ve always hated me, and we’ve tried killing each other on more than one occasion. I’ve hurt you and your friends several times. And now, you stand before me so kind and sweet. But I know it isn’t real.”

Her heart stilled. Did he know she was faking it? She thought she’d been careful. “What do you mean?”

“Klaus took your memories away.”

“I know. You told us our minds have been altered.”

He shook his head. “No. He took everything. Your entire life.”

She gasped. Why would Xavier tell her the truth? What was his angle? Was he playing her? She had to keep playing along. “What?”

“He made you think you were born here and that the Elders took you from us. I can’t keep lying to you, Ava. Ever since I first saw you in that school lunchroom, I felt something real. Something I had never felt before, and it pissed me off. Because I was there to force you all back here, to become one of us. I was angry that the one person I ever felt anything for was also my enemy. And for years I took that anger out on you.”

“What?”

He let out a frustrated sigh, and placed his hands on her face. He stared into her eyes. His gesture surprised her. It took everything she had to pretend to like him and not want to murder him. She hoped he wouldn’t try to kiss her. She couldn’t do that to Gabriel. Or herself.

“Ava, I love you.”

Her pulse quickened, and her head was dizzy from all the confessions. She took a step back, and his hands dropped from her face. “Tell me the truth.” She wanted to hear his side of the story. Since he apparently
loved
her and all.

“You weren’t born one of us, even though your mom was one. You grew up on the Elders’ side, always thinking we were the enemies. Granted, the two sides have been warring with each other for years. But who’s to say which side is right? When we met, it was my job to bring you and the rest of the Elementals here. It took a while, but we finally did it. Except, we kidnapped several of your coven so that the Elders would come to us. So we could fight on our turf. It was all a ruse, really. We just wanted the Elementals. Now that we have you, Havok’s using you to obliterate the Ephemerals.”

“Why does he need us?”

“Because you’re more powerful than any of us. Hunters can’t kill you.”

“What?”

“It’s weird. They have a potent poison that they shoot, and once it enters an Enchanter’s vein, they die within minutes. Elementals are somehow immune. Probably because it’s made from the elements.”

“Wow.” She hadn’t known that. That was why Havok wanted the Elementals so much. Because Hunters killed his army. All this time she feared Hunters. That was why she didn’t die when the Hunters attacked, but Gabriel almost did. Had there been more Hunters, she was sure they could’ve obliterated Havok’s army again. How had Savina or Colden or any of the Elders not known this?

“I hate what I’ve done to you.”

“Why did we hurt each other?”

“You were acting in self-defense. It was my job to torture you.”

“Couldn’t you have stopped? I mean, you claim you love me.”

He sighed. “I do, Ava. And I don’t expect that love to ever be returned.”

“Are you afraid my memories will come back?”

“Your memories will never return.”

“So why tell me all of this? Why risk my feelings changing for you?”

“Because I can’t stand it. You aren’t the same anymore. And it bothers me to my core. I never felt like this with anyone. And I know it’s silly because now that I’ve told you all of this, I know you will look at me differently.”

“What did you do to me in the past?”

His eyes grew dark. “I kidnapped your boyfriend at the time and used him for bait. I had a Halfling set fire to your house, almost killing your father. I’ve done terrible things, Ava.”

“So why did you do it?” She heard the anger in her voice.

“I had to.”

“No you didn’t. You didn’t have to do any of it! We train and train every day so we can kill. We’re all killers. And for what? Does it help anyone feel better? Does it vindicate us at all?”

“I have to because Havok is my father.”

That brought her up short. So her vision was right. “I thought you said Ephemerals killed your parents. Or did you lie about that too?”

“They did. And Havok found me as a baby and raised me. He’s not the horrible monster everyone seems to think he is.”

“Maybe not to you. Why has he been warring with everyone for centuries?”

Xavier hesitated. “I’m not ever allowed to talk about it. Not many people know.”

“Tell me. I want to know. If we’re killing them, I want to know why.”

He looked around like he was making sure no one was within earshot. He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the bridge into the city.

She wavered at first, but then let him lead her away. “Where are we going?”

“Somewhere more private.”

The city wasn’t what she expected. The village was where the Royalty stayed, but this part of the city must have been for the poorer Enchanters. It was dark, the streets wet from the day’s rain, and mumbling people meandered around the tall abandoned warehouse-type buildings. When she looked up, she saw some lights on in a few of the brick buildings. The fire escape ladders had all been cut off. Ava clutched Xavier’s hand harder than she wanted to, but she didn’t know what these people would do. It was definitely much different than the first time she saw the city.

They jogged down the street, turned a corner, and once they reached the end of that street, he stopped in front of brick building with only a few lights. The windows had bars on them. Xavier pushed open the door and they walked through a dim hallway. The place reeked of mildew and humidity. The only light was a single bulb in the ceiling, with no cover, and it flickered. There was a path of muddy footprints on the beat up wood floor. The stair rail had seen better days, and Ava was sure the place had once been lovely.

“Why are we here?” she whispered.

“I live here.”

They climbed two flights of stairs, which creaked every step of the way, and made their way down a long corridor. He stopped in front of a door with old brass numbers on it that read 214. Unlocking the door, he gave it a hard shove, and they walked through. He turned on the lights, and Ava was surprised. The furniture was too nice for a place like this, and too modern for Ava. It was black and very masculine.

“I thought you lived in the castle.”

“I do. But I come here when I need a moment. And if I hang out in the city and don’t want to trek back to the castle. It’s not much, but I like it. Plus, no one knows about this place nor would they ever come looking for me here.”

He made a good point. “Were those Enchanters on the streets?”

“Yes.”

“Why do they live so poorly? I thought Havok protected everyone and made sure they had a great life.”

Xavier sat on the arm of the recliner as Ava leaned against the bar counter to the kitchen. “They’ve been stripped of their powers. He doesn’t want to kill them, because he doesn’t want to appear as a monster to the people.”

Ava raised an eyebrow. “He slit Maggie and Kira’s throats in front of everyone. How does that not make him a monster?”

Xavier clenched his teeth, and got to his feet. “They betrayed us! Anyone who betrays us dies. The people out on the streets did small crimes. And only the army sees what happens inside the castle.” His voice softened.

“That makes sense. Okay, so you brought me here to this…place. Tell me the truth.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Stop stalling.”

“Could you give me a second? This isn’t exactly easy for me to tell. Especially, when I’ve never told anyone. Ever.”

Ava took a breath. She could respect that. But only for so long. “Okay. Yeah, I’m a little hungry.”

“Good. I’ll make dinner. Can you start a fire?”

“Sure. I guess.” She wanted him to hurry and give her the answers. Xavier busied himself in the kitchen, and she put a couple of logs in the fireplace and lit it. Staring into the fire, she remembered all those nights she stayed up with Gabriel near the fireplace in the library. She liked to think of it as their sacred place. She missed him and he probably wondered where she was. She wanted to be with him. Especially since she didn’t know how long she’d be alive. It seemed like she was spending her last days with Xavier.

Ava went to the kitchen. The expensive tile floors obviously didn’t come with the apartment. It was weird that he renovated his apartment in such a crappy building. There wasn’t anything personal. It could have belonged to anyone. Then again, did Xavier really have that many personal items? When would he have had time or energy to collect them? And she certainly couldn’t imagine there being photos of him and Havok smiling.

She watched him prepare a chicken dish. He was careful in cutting the chicken in half. Very meticulous. He coated it with a breading and then placed it in a hot pan. He’d already had a pot of boiling water on the stove.

“How often do you come here?”

“Probably more than I should.”

“Why?”

“Living at the castle can be stressful, obviously. It’s like there’s always someone there watching you, or ready to turn you in at any given moment. I’m not exactly well liked there since I’m Havok’s son.”

“They don’t seem to like anyone.”

He smirked. “They don’t like you all because they feel you’ve replaced them.”

“Replaced them to kill Ephemerals. If Havok has never told his past to anyone, why does everyone follow him, no questions asked?”

“Some were raised here. Some…had their memories erased.”

“Does he do that to everyone? Just seems like a huge copout in order to gain an army.”

“It happens more than it should.”

“Why do you do nothing to stop it?”

He sighed and rolled his eyes. “You have no idea what it’s like to be Havok’s son.”

“Weren’t Colden and Savina his offspring? They got away.”

“And you saw what happened to Savina and Colden.” He shook his head. “Sorry. They took those memories from you.”

She remembered Havok killing them both. She quickly removed the thoughts from her mind, but felt guilty that Xavier was baring his soul. Then again did she really owe him much? “What happened?”

“He killed Savina when the Elders attacked us. And you know what happened to Colden.”

She did, but she wasn't sure the memory-erased Ava knew.

“Oh, well, Colden came to kill his father and reaped his soul. so for several years, Havok's soul actually lived inside Colden. Both souls occupied the body. And then you—.” He stopped.

“What?” she asked. She was curious to hear his version of what happened to her.

He took a breath. “You had gotten possessed by a soul and killed Colden.”

Ava already felt guilty for that, but was on the path to moving forward and not blaming herself so much. And now hearing it from her enemy somehow hurt worse. She lowered onto the stool, and swallowed thickly. She had to keep her emotions in check.

“You saved Havok,” he quickly said.

“But his son died. Was he sad at all? Did he even care?”

Xavier sighed, and there was something in his eyes. Confliction? Disappointment? Probably conflicted about telling her the disappointing truth. Havok never cared for his children once they escaped him. “They abandoned him, and sided against him. They tried to kill him multiple times.”

“Because they were protecting the Ephemerals. And because they never wanted to war.” Which was exactly how Havok felt before he went crazy.

“Not many of us do.”