Under Construction (4 page)

Jameson
winked at the younger woman. “So…I take it, it’s over.”

“From
her point of view it never started,” Michelle said sadly.

“I’m
sorry, Shell.”

“Yeah,
well. Fools do foolish things,” Michelle said.

“Why
didn’t you tell your mom?” Jameson wondered.

Michelle
shrugged. She adored her mother. She admired her mother. She felt
utterly
stupid. “Tell my mother, who is the
best judge of character I know, that I am a total moron?”

Jameson
sighed and shook her head. “Your mom would never think that,” she said
honestly.

“My mom
is the smartest person I know, J.D.”

Jameson
smiled. “Me too,” she agreed. “But, she hasn’t had perfect success in the
relationship department, Shell. And, she would never judge you. She might find
a way to ban this Lisa person from life itself though,” Jameson chuckled
thinking of how protective Candace was of her kids.

Michelle
laughed. “I know…it’s not just that.”

“Okay?”

Michelle
let out a heavy sigh. “I quit,” she said. Jameson’s confusion was evident. “My
job, J.D. I quit my job.” Jameson waited for her to continue, unsure of what to
say. “I cannot go in there and face them every day next year. I can’t do it.
He’s told half the staff that I tried to steal his fiancée.”

“They’re
engaged?”

“No.
Well, I guess they are now. They certainly were not when Lisa and I started
seeing each other.”

“Jesus.”

“Yeah,
no shit,” Michelle said.

“What
are you going to do?” Jameson asked.

Michelle
shook her head. “There’s a position in Albany. It’s mine if I want it.”

“Okay?”

“I
don’t know…my lease isn’t up until January. It pays a little less than my
district now. I can’t afford two apartments. I might be able to sublet in the
fall, but there’s no guarantee,” Michelle explained. Jameson started to open
her mouth and Michelle silenced her. “I can’t ask my mom, J.D. I’ve never asked
my mom for money. Not once. We all have a trust fund that we get when we turn
twenty-eight. I’m not asking her for anything now. It’s my problem.”

Jameson
took a sip of her beer to conceal her smile. She loved Michelle. She realized
it might not be right for her to have a favorite when it came to Candace’s
children, but she did. Shell was her ally. Shell, when she thought about it,
was a lot like a little sister. They were only nine years apart in age. Jameson
recognized Michelle’s affection and admiration for her mother immediately. What
impressed her was Michelle’s respect for Candace. That went a long way with
Jameson. She sipped her beer for a minute, replaying the conversation she and
Candace had over lunch.

“Jameson, keeping three residences is crazy.”

Jameson nodded. “Are you asking me to move in?”

“I suppose that is exactly what I am suggesting.”

“You know I want to,” Jameson said.

“But?”

“It’s not about us,” Jameson said. She saw Candace tense. “It
isn’t. I would much rather be here with you. You know that,” she said
assuredly.

“Okay?” Candace questioned.

“The firm is in Albany. I can’t ask my whole staff to relocate
because I fell in love,” Jameson explained. Candace smiled. “I might hate it,
but even when Bryan comes back, there will be times I just can’t work remotely.
I have to be there.”

“I know,” Candace said in a defeated tone.

“I could sell the condo,” Jameson said. “Or, I could rent it,
but with as much time as I am there, well….I’d rather not be relegated to
crappie hotel rooms. I’d rather be…”

“Home?” Candace guessed.

“Comfortable,” Jameson corrected her. “If that
were
home, I wouldn’t have come here this
weekend.” Candace nodded. “Honestly, I’d rather be wherever you are….even when
that’s in Washington.”

Candace was surprised at Jameson’s honesty. “You would want to
stay in D.C.?”

“I have a lot of clients in the area. I’ve been thinking of
opening a small office there,” Jameson said. “Before you say anything; I’ve
been considering it for over a year. I guess I just have added incentive now.”

“And, a place to stay,” Candace teased.

“There’s that,” Jameson admitted with a wink.

“I know that it’s inevitable,” Candace admitted. “That we will
have to be apart at times.” She took a deep breath. “I’d like to limit that,”
she said quietly.

Jameson smiled. She knew this was difficult for her lover.
Candace had resigned herself to being alone. In many ways, so had Jameson.
Their relationship was still new. Six months was hardly a lifetime, but Jameson
felt sure it was only the beginning of their
life
together. Candace’s decision to broach this subject assured her that they were
on the same page. Both had fears. Both had insecurities. Both were certain they
wanted to be together, and that trumped everything else.

“We’ll figure it out,” Jameson said. “That
is
if you could stand me being around more
often.”

“I think I could survive your presence,” Candace said.
“Besides, Pearl misses you.”

Jameson smirked. “Oh, I see. Looking out for Pearl.”

“Of course,” Candace winked. “And, you wanted that cat.”

“Mm-hm. Worried about Jinx getting lonely?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I just want to make sure someone is
there to keep an eye on him. The last thing we need is fleas in the house.”

Jameson couldn’t help but laugh. “That would be a travesty.”

“And ticks.”

“Mm.”

“Jameson, it’s true!”

“Yes, since he is indoor all the time he might get fleas from
the mice he catches,” Jameson said.

“What mice?” Candace jumped slightly. “Mice? I haven’t seen a
mouse in that house in forever.”

Jameson finally laughed. “More like six months,” Jameson
mumbled.

“What?”

“Nothing. You are right. Pearl can’t be expected to supervise
Jinx all the time.”

“Glad we agree,” Candace said.

“I know better than to argue with a politician.” Candace threw
her napkin at Jameson. “We’ll work it out,” Jameson said earnestly. Candace
just smiled.

“What
are you grinning about?” Michelle asked Jameson.

“Huh?
Oh, just thinking about your mom and Jinx.”

“The
cat?” Michelle asked.

“Yeah….Listen,
I think I might have a solution to your problem. Not the asshole problem, the
Albany problem,” Jameson clarified.

“J.D.,
I’m not moving home.”

“I
wasn’t going to suggest that you should,” Jameson responded.

“I’m
not asking Mom…”

“Shell!
God! You really are your mother’s daughter. Stubborn,” Jameson laughed.
Michelle pursed her lips. “Would you just listen?” Michelle
groaned
but acquiesced. “Thank you,” Jameson
sighed. “I have my condo in Albany…”

“J.D. I
am not….”

“Shell!
Shut up already!” Jameson ordered in exasperation.

“Wow.
That was authoritative, J.D. I am impressed.”

Jameson
laughed. “Can you just….please….let me finish?” Michelle waved her hand for Jameson
to continue. “The thing is, your mom and I, well….I get stuck in Albany a lot
and I don’t really want to have to impose on friends or stay in hotels.”

“Ha!
You and mom are moving in together!”

Jameson
sighed. “I probably should not be telling you this.”

“Why
not?”

“Look,
you could stay at my condo. Keep an eye on things for me. I’d have a place to
crash when I need to be there….”

“I’m
not freeloading off my mom’s girlfriend,” Michelle protested.

“You
wouldn’t be. You’d be helping me out. And, for the record…I would hope you
consider me as much your friend as your mom’s girlfriend.”

“J.D.
it’s a generous offer. I don’t want to take advantage of you.”

Jameson
nodded. Michelle was sincere. “Shell…you wouldn’t be. Six months when your
lease is up we can talk. If you want to stay there, we can talk about you
renting the place. It
actually
would
solve both of our problems. And, you couldn’t freeload off me. You’re family.
That’s not how it works,” Jameson said honestly.

Michelle’s
lips had turned up into a genuine smile. “I’m happy for you,” she said.

“Huh?”

“For
you and Mom,” Michelle said. “Can I think about it?”

“Of
course,” Jameson said.

“J.D.?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.”
Jameson just nodded with a smile.

“Here
you two are!” Candace called. She walked up and picked up on the genuine
emotion between Jameson and her daughter. She raised a brow at the pair. “I
miss all the good stuff, don’t I?”

Jameson
pulled Candace into her lap. “Is that really how you feel?” she flirted.

“Gross!”
Michelle exclaimed in amusement. Candace kissed Jameson in response. “Get a
room,” Michelle laughed.

“You’re
just jealous,” Jameson teased.

“Yeah…and
that is wrong on so many levels,” Michelle said with a shake of her head.

Candace
looked at Jameson inquisitively. “Assholes and railroad tracks,” Jameson
explained. Candace shook her head in confusion and then laid it on Jameson’s
shoulder. Jameson relaxed and held her lover close.

“I need
another beer,” Michelle stated. “Anyone else?”

“Sure,”
Jameson agreed, giving Candace a quick kiss.

“Mom?”

“Sure.”

Michelle
rolled her eyes in amusement at her mother and Jameson. She looked back over
her shoulder and smiled at the pair. She’d never seen her mother so relaxed.
She hadn’t told Jameson the entire truth. Michelle wanted to be closer to home.
She wanted to be closer to her mother. She’d never been close to her father.
She’d always felt awkward around Candace’s former partner, Jessica. It was
different now. Michelle felt more at home than she could ever recall when she
was with her mother, Jameson, and Pearl. She was reeling from Lisa’s betrayal.
It had blown up just when Michelle was preparing to invite Lisa home to meet
her family. Now, it was her family that Michelle needed. She worried about
intruding on their life, but selfishly she felt she needed them both. Jameson
was; what was Jameson? A friend? She was that, but it was somehow different.
Michelle cared what Jameson thought almost as much as she worried about her
mother’s opinion. She shook off her musings. Jameson was too young to be a parental
figure. “Maybe another big sister,” Michelle thought. She looked back when she
heard her mother’s laugh and felt it fill her heart. “I hope I find that
someday,” she thought.”

Jameson could hardly believe that
it was already Thursday. She was anxious to finish out the next two days in
Albany and get home. The Fourth of July was only a week away. Monday, Jonah was
due to arrive. Tuesday, her brother Toby and his
wife
Liz were expected to make their appearance with Jameson’s two
nephews. By Wednesday, all three of Candace’s children would be home, and then
on Thursday, Jameson’s parents planned on making the trip with her younger brother
and Jameson’s niece. Candace’s brother David and his brood, along with Dana,
Steve,
and their two children were also
expected to join them. Friday was the official
barbecue
,
but the event itself was more like three days of unofficial festivities. Candace
thrived on being around people. Jameson was a bit more reserved in that manner.
She was praying that there would be no drama.

Marianne
had been civil, even cordial bordering on kind to Jameson when they had met.
Jameson was
certain
that Candace’s oldest
child had reservations about her relationship with Candace. Jameson’s younger
brother had expressed concerns to her as well. While his reasoning to Jameson
was the constant distance between the pair, Jameson suspected it had more to do
with Candace’s political beliefs and public persona. Doug was two years younger
than Jameson and the family conservative. They always joked about her father’s
Republican affiliation, but Jameson’s father, Duncan had long ago shifted
alliances. Jameson imagined that was a product of so many years loving her
mother and having a lesbian daughter. Doug somehow got what Jameson called the
recessive gene. She loved her younger
brother,
but she often wondered how they could have been raised in the same house by the
same parents.

“J.D.?”
a familiar voice came from the doorway to Jameson’s office. She swiveled her
chair around.

“Shell?”

“Yeah,
sorry. I seem to be showing up unannounced a lot lately, huh?” Michelle said
sheepishly.

“Everything
okay?” Jameson asked.

“No,”
Michelle chuckled. “But it will be. I was hoping maybe you might possibly have
a minute to talk,” Michelle asked hopefully.

“Wow,
that was a mouthful,” Jameson laughed. “I need a break anyway. How about
lunch?”

“I
don’t want to take you away from….”

“From
all this?” Jameson shook her head. “Come on, let’s go. I need some fuel. Food
and a
gigantic
coffee.”

***

“Dana, please,” Candace tried to
keep her rising temper under control.

“I
understand, Candy. Aren’t you at least going to consider it?” Dana asked her
boss. Candace frowned. “What does J.D. think?” Dana asked.

“I
don’t know.”

“What
do you mean? She didn’t have any thoughts at all?” Dana was amazed.

“I
don’t know because I haven’t told her,” Candace said flatly.

“Don’t
you think you should?”

“There
is nothing to tell. I’m not doing it,” Candace said.

“Candy,
you would make a fabulous governor. And, think about where that would position
you in six years?” Dana said enthusiastically. Candace groaned. “Candy! Come
on! They are lining you up as a heavy hitter and you know it. If you wanted to
make a run for….”

“I
don’t,” Candace stopped her friend’s diatribe.

“No
offense, but I think you are full of shit,” Dana challenged the senator.

“No
offense, but I didn’t ask for your opinion,” Candace replied in kind.

“Why
are you so set against this?” Dana asked. Candace put her face in her hands. “It’s
J.D., isn’t it?” Dana softened her tone. Candace sighed. “Candy, I know you
love the
Senate
. I do. This is
a huge
chance.”

“If I
won, you mean.”

“You’ll
win if you run,” Dana said confidently. “You know it as well as I do.”
Candace’s lips upturned into a small smirk. “So, let’s have it. Is it really
because this is where you want to stay? You have some aversion to governing the
State of New York? Or…is it something else?”

Candace
huffed and removed her glasses to rub her tired eyes. “Would I win? Probably,”
Candace agreed. Dana perked up. “I said probably,” Candace tempered Dana’s
enthusiasm. “State politics are different, Dana. I’ve been in
Congress
now for fifteen years. Election
battles are not so difficult now for me. People know me in the role. They trust
me in this role. No one wants to fund a lame horse. The odds of a payoff in
betting against me in a
Senate
bid are
just not that great, not yet anyway. It’s simply not their best investment.”

“That’s
my point!” Dana said.

“Yes,
but this is a different ball game. Different players. Different positions.
Different strategies,” Candace reminded her friend.

“You
love campaigning. And, you are incredibly
popular
at home. Look at your approval ratings.”

“I know
all of that. New York is a different state in a state election. There are
different
issues and concerns. I don’t know
that I want to invest all of that. The research into campaign strategies, the
money….the time,” Candace said.

“Are
you worried about J.D.?”

Candace
smiled. “No….not in the way that you are thinking,” Candace said.

“What
way am I thinking?” Dana asked.

“
Dana…
Jameson will tell me to do what I want to
do. That is what she will say,” Candace said.

“So?
What’s the problem?”

“I
don’t know that it
is
what I want to
do,” Candace replied honestly.

“Part
of you wants to and…”

“I love
Jameson.”

Dana
smiled. “I know you do. What does that have to do with this? You just said that
J.D. will support whatever you decide.”

Candace
sighed heavily, flipped her glasses onto her desk and took a deep breath. “Yes,
she will. I see that gleam in your eyes, Dana.”

“Would
you jump to do it if you weren’t involved with J.D.?”

“I
don’t know,” Candace answered honestly. “I love what I am doing. You know that
is the truth,” Candace said. She could see the skepticism in Dana’s eyes. “I
had the chance last go round for a cabinet appointment. You know that too.”

“Yes,
but you were worried about Jonah then.”

“And, I
resolved myself that this is where I wanted to be.”

“And?”
Dana urged.

“And,
my life is different again. I like my life right now,” Candace said. She saw
Dana studying her. “There’s still a lot to learn how to balance. I’m not sure I
want to shake the apple cart so soon.”

“Candy,
the election is two years off. You have time.”

“Not
really, and we both know it. If I want to do this, I need to make that clear
and I need to start looking at my team now,” Candace said bluntly.

“You
have to talk to J.D.,” Dana said. “She’s going to hear the chatter and you know
it.”

Candace
smiled. She was not afraid to discuss the possibilities in her career with
Jameson. She had hoped to get through the holiday before doing that. Jameson
had tried to conceal her apprehension about the big family
barbecue
. Candace could see the clues to the
trepidation that lingered in Jameson’s mind. If Candace
were
to be honest, she felt a few jitters when she allowed herself the
time to stop and consider the upcoming event.

Candace
had immediately clicked with Jameson’s parents. She adored Jameson’s mother,
Maureen. She wasn’t worried about anyone’s approval, but she hoped that the two
families would find some common ground. Family meant a great deal to both
her
and Jameson. Family gatherings were
stressful in the best of circumstances over many years. This would be the first
go round for the new couple. She wanted to limit the stress in both their lives
until they were on the other side of next weekend.

Still,
political chatter was bound to start soon. Candace knew that as well. The fact
was that the party was exerting a comfortable pressure on her to consider a bid
for the governorship. She fully expected that they would be turning up the heat
in the coming months. She was a viable candidate with national name
recognition. The governorship of New York would place her as an excellent Vice
Presidential nominee, or if she chose, a candidate for The White House herself.
That had never been her ambition. She was skeptical about a
middle-aged
lesbian’s viability in such a high
powered candidacy. She could not deny that fact that attitudes were changing.
Six years from now, it might be a different ball game. The Democratic Party
wanted a strong, well-placed candidate when that tide finally sifted. She would
have been lying if she suggested that the idea did not, at the very least,
intrigue her.

“I was
going to wait until after the festivities on the
Fourth
,” Candace said.

“But?”
Dana asked, sensing a slight shift in Candace’s mood.

“There’s
no point in waiting,” Candace admitted.

“Candy…Can
I ask you something? I mean, as your friend, not as an adviser in any
capacity?”

“Of
course.”

“Are
you afraid that this….possibly taking a different course will scare J.D. off?”

“No,”
Candace answered immediately. She wasn’t. “That’s not it at all,
Dana,
” Candace noted the inquisitive expression
on the younger woman’s face. She laughed quietly. “I know you may not understand
this….I like the downtime. It’s nice to just come home and be with someone.
No kids
under foot. They visit. It’s a nice
change of pace. I raised three kids while juggling two careers my whole adult
life. I barely saw Jessica and Jonathan when you think about it. Jameson
is….well, it’s
entirely
different.
Jessica always wanted to be going. We were on the go constantly. Jonathan was
the same way. That has never been me and you know it.”

“I
know. I know that you like your down time, Candy, but you love the social piece
as well. You thrive on it,” Dana smirked.

“Yes,
but not incessantly. I like balance,” Candace said. Dana nodded. “I won’t make
this decision by myself, Dana.”

“I am
happy for you; you know?”

Candace
smiled. “Me too.”

“But,
selfishly….I hope you do it,” Dana admitted.

Candace
laughed. “I would never have guessed.”

***

“J.D., are you sure you would be
okay with this? I mean, it’s your place and…”

“Shell,
I already told you; you would be helping me out,” Jameson said.

“What
did Mom say?” Michelle asked.

“I
didn’t say anything to her yet,” Jameson said.

“Really?”

“Shell,
I love your mom, but I would not betray your confidence unless I thought I
needed to for some reason. She knows that.”

“Thanks,”
Michelle said. “I did tell her a bit about things with Lisa.”

“I
know,” Jameson replied.

“Do you
think she will be mad?”

Jameson
smiled at Michelle. “Mad? About what?”

“Me
quitting my job,” Michelle said.

Jameson
nodded and took a sip from her iced coffee. “No. I don’t.
 
She won’t want to admit it, least of all to
you,” Jameson chuckled, “but she will be happy that you will be closer to
home.”

“You
really think so?” Michelle asked hesitantly.

“Yes,
but you already know that,” Jameson said with a wink.

“Are
you excited about Mom’s big party?” Michelle changed the subject. Jameson tried
to smile, but it failed in its sincerity. “That’s what I thought,” Michelle
laughed. “Don’t let Marianne scare you,” she said. “She’s got a loud bark, but
no real bite. Trust me.” Jameson sighed. “J.D., seriously….”

“It’s
not just Marianne,” Jameson said honestly.

“Jonah?”

“It’s
all of it,” Jameson said. “My brothers, Marianne, Jonah, my parents…It’s just…”

“Mom’s
a master. She can make anyone feel like they belong. Besides, Grandma Pearl
will be there. No one messes with Grandma Pearl,” Michelle said. Jameson had to
smile at the truth in that assessment. “Don’t worry,” Michelle took Jameson’s
hand. “If all else fails; I’ll protect you,” Michelle winked conspiratorially.

Jameson
laughed out loud. “My bodyguard?”

“Sure.
I can be scrappy if necessary. You live with my mom for twenty-six years; you
learn.”

“I
believe it,”
Jameson said. “I’ll whistle if I
need you.”

“Deal,”
Michelle said. “J.D.?”

“What?”

“I
just….Thanks again….for everything.”

“You
don’t owe me any thanks, but you are welcome.”