Under His Command (Six-Alarm Sexy) (14 page)

“Okay, I can agree to that.”

“What about restraints? Ropes, handcuffs?”

“You want to tie me up?”

His groin clenched at her innocent question. “More than you know,” he said, his voice hoarse.

“Oh. Okay then. As long as I’m not covered in rope burns or left there for hours.”

“Hours, definitely not.” She shot him a perplexed glance. But she must have read his desire because her eyes widened and her cheeks bloomed with color. He wouldn’t leave her tied up alone for hours, but anticipation was most certainly part of the game. “How do you feel about toys?”

“Toys? Like vibrators?”

“Vibrators, dildos, balls, butt plugs, nipple clamps, genital clamps, things like that.”

“I’ve never tried any of those things.”

He stopped and turned, running a finger along the side of her face. “Oh honey. You’ve never had a vibrator? What did you do the year we were apart?”

She pursed her lips. “I used my hand.”

“And when we were together?”

“Nothing. If we didn’t have sex, then I did nothing.”

His heart swelled. God, she was more than perfect. “Let’s keep it that way. Remember, I want all your orgasms.”

She closed her eyes and nodded. “Since I don’t know how any of those will feel, we can try them.”

“I have to trust you to tell me if there’s anything you don’t like.”

“I will.”

“Blindfolds, we know you like those. What about hoods? Gags? Ball gags? Masks?”

Smiling, she said, “I did like the blindfold. The others I don’t know. I’m not too good with closed-in spaces.”

“We’ll go slowly with those then. Last thing for now—vaginal and anal fisting.” She hissed in a breath and blanched. “Okay,” he said, quickly. “Hard limit.”

She sighed, her relief visible. “Other than the fact that you want my butt, do you have any other must-haves?”

BDSM was wide and varied and there were many other things they could try. But everything else was too hardcore for her. For them. Except… “How do you feel about double penetration?”

Her eyes widened. “Like two men at a time?”

“Fuck no!” He scowled at her. “You want that?” If she said yes, he was in serious fucking trouble. It wasn’t that he had something against threesomes. People who live in glass houses and all that. But the idea of another man touching Rickie, making love to her—made him rabid.

She rubbed her fingers between his brows and smiled. “Relax, Jamie. I don’t want anyone but you.”

Tension drained from his shoulders as he studied her expression, open and honest. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly. Then framing her face, he pressed his lips to hers in a possessive kiss. He poured everything into it—his love for her, his need to protect her, to keep her safe, to make her his. When he pulled back, they were both breathing hard. “It’s just you and me, Rickie. No one else. Ever.”

Her expression clouded. “How can you be so sure? We still have a long way to go. Not everything’s been resolved.”

Christ
. He felt like he’d been hit in the gut with a sledgehammer. “You’re still thinking of leaving me?”

“No. Of course not. You’re the only man I want. I realize that I haven’t been the wife you deserve, but I’m trying to change that. I feel like we’re finally communicating, like we’re both working hard to make this marriage a success.” She ran her hand over his chest muscles and sent him a shy smile as she raked her nails over his nipple. “We’ve made a great start.”

A groan in his throat, he caught her hand and brought it to his mouth. Baring his teeth, he nipped her index finger. Her pupils dilated despite the bright sun.

She cleared her throat. “So… uh… what did you mean about the double…” When he grinned, she left the question unfinished.

“Interested in that, are you, Mrs. Caldwell?” He snaked his hand over her hip to her delectable backside. “I can take your pretty pussy and your tight ass at the same time with a little help from a toy.”

She nibbled her lip and lifted her eyes to his, so sexy and playful that he wanted to tumble her onto the sand and take her right there in front of all the beachgoers. “Any other orifices you’d like to fill?” she asked.

“Just this one,” he said, tracing her lips. Her tongue darted out and touched his finger. He caught his breath.

She stepped in to him, and her hand roamed down his chest to his groin. “We still haven’t taken care of this.”

In a heart’s beat, his half-hard cock was ready for action. When he thrust into her palm, she smiled. “What are you suggesting, Mrs. Caldwell?”

“A little
quid pro quo
?”

“You’ve got yourself a deal.” He had it bad; even her use of Latin legal terms turned him on. Taking her hand, he turned her toward the parking lot. They’d go to the cottage, but first he had to get his bag of toys.

Chapter 6

Erica’s belly fluttered as they walked up the path from the beach. Why had she pushed Jamie? He’d seemed ready to call it a day, even though up to now, everything had been about her. She’d caught a glimpse of his wild side in the restaurant parking lot, but she really wanted to see him let go. It was clear now that to do that, she was going to have to show him that it was okay to test the limits. If not, he’d stay in the safe zone and in control. While this dominant Jamie was sexy as heck, he was capable of far more.

The fluttering turned to flipping as the truth came to her. She pressed her hand to her stomach, willing it to settle. If she wanted Jamie to let go, she’d have to let go as well. Did she trust him enough to do that? Did she trust him enough to let herself be vulnerable?

Jamie touched her shoulder. “Hey, you okay?” His voice was laden with concern.

She faked a bright smile. “I’m fine. You?”

He hesitated for a moment as though he wanted to say something but wasn’t sure he should. Finally he blew out a breath. “Scared shitless.”

What
? Stopping in her tracks, she spun around to face him and peered into his beautiful eyes, which were filled with fear and trepidation. Her heart warmed. Wordlessly, she slipped her arms around his waist and rested her cheek on his solid chest.

Stroking her back, he held her close and nuzzled her hair. “Rickie, we have all our lives to work on this. Let’s slow down. The last thing I want is for you to be afraid of me or what I might do to you.”

“Is that what you’re scared about? That I’ll fear you?”

“Yes. I’ve seen it before, that frightened deer look.”

“From one of your subs?” He dropped his hands and shoved them into his pockets, staring down at his bare feet. A shudder worked its way up her spine and she wrapped her arms around herself. She might not like what he had to tell her, but he needed to say it and she needed to hear it. “Tell me what happened,” she said softly, the way she’d ask Chloe to share a bad dream.

He filled his lungs, then exhaled, the sound surprisingly loud despite the crashing of the waves on the beach. Still avoiding her gaze, he said, “It was years ago, with my first sub. I was so young, so cocksure. Neither of us really knew what we were doing.” Raising his head, he met her stare. “I hurt her. Badly.”

Folding his arms across his chest, he turned away from her and took a few steps toward the water. Her chest tight, she followed. “Was it an accident?”

“Whips, canes, clamps, even a crop or flogger can be dangerous in the wrong hands. But I didn’t want her to know how little experience I had. I treated her like a guinea pig.”

“Why didn’t she stop you, or at least tell you she was hurting?”

“I betrayed her trust by lying about my expertise, and she lied about how much pain she could tolerate.”

“I take it you figured it out.”

“She had bruises on her body, some cuts and burns. She’d always explain them away—she’d fallen or burned herself taking food out of the oven. I believed her, convinced myself to believe her. But then she started getting
that
look in her eyes whenever we—” His mouth straightened into a thin hard line.

Wow. The way he described it, his sub sounded like an abused spouse. She couldn’t imagine Jamie intentionally hurting anyone. For heaven’s sake, he risked his life every day to rescue strangers. He wouldn’t knowingly injure someone he cared about. She touched his forearm. “That must have been hard on you.”

He barked out an angry laugh. “Not as hard as it was on her.”

“Stop it, Jamie. I know you. If she’d told you or even if you’d only suspected that she didn’t like what was going on, you’d have stopped, safeword or no safeword.”

He uncrossed his arms and leaned forward until their noses were only an inch apart. He was so close, his breath brushed her lips. “Are you sure about that?”

“Yes.”

“How sure?”

“Sure enough to let you do it to me. Right now.”

His face paled and he jerked backward. He stabbed his fingers into his short hair and dropped his head. “I don’t know, Rickie. We can play around, but when it comes to the rest… I don’t think I can risk it.”

“Risk what?”

“You lying to me too.”

She shook her head to emphasize her point. “I won’t.”

“You say that. But women have a tendency to let men go too far, to put their own needs and wants aside for their lover’s pleasure. I want your surrender, Rickie. Not your sacrifice.” His voice broke. “You’ve already given up too much because of me.”

Not that again
. The man was so frustrating, she wanted to stamp her foot. “I thought we were past that. We’ve both made mistakes. We’ve both kept secrets. But we’ve also both made a decision to be honest with each other.” She smoothed her fingers over his stubbly jaw, trying to soothe away his mulish expression. “I promise to tell you if I don’t want to do something.”

“You’ll use the safeword if it hurts or you’re too scared.”

“I will. And in return you have to promise to be yourself. Don’t be afraid, and don’t decide for me what I want or don’t want.”

He smoothed a lock of hair behind her ear. “What do you want right now?”

“You. I want to feel you inside me.”

“Vanilla?”

“No. I want the Dark Knight, not Prince Charming.”

“Be careful what you ask for.”

“I’m up for it, Mr. Caldwell. Are you?”

His eyes darkened, his features shifting subtly, becoming harder, more intense. She’d awakened a fire-breathing dragon. The Master was back.

Gripping his bag of sex toys with one hand and Rickie with the other, Jamie marched into the cottage. Adrenaline raced through his system, triggered by a mix of terror and exhilaration, a rush he usually only experienced when facing a potentially life-threatening situation. To some extent the comparison was apt. His life wasn’t on the line, but his marriage was.

He ushered Rickie through the door and locked it behind them. She entered and stopped by the bed, watching him in silence as he closed the curtains and turned on lights. Her eyes were wide and anxious, but her lips were curved in an encouraging smile.

Shit. Could she tell how nervous he was? If he didn’t appear confident and self-assured, she wouldn’t trust him to know what he was doing. And he wouldn’t blame her. Hardening his expression, he nodded toward the bathroom. “Take off your dress and put on a bra and some panties. Then bring me your body lotion.” Spanking her behind had been incredibly gratifying, but now he needed to take care of it so she didn’t hurt. He kept his promises.

When the bathroom door clicked shut, he let out a long breath before rolling his shoulders and shaking out his arms. A tense upper body would make his movements stiff and jerky. He wanted—and Rickie needed—everything he did to be fluid and controlled.

More relaxed, he reached into the shopping bag of props he’d bought that morning and began to set the scene. He pulled out some scented candles and gave them a sniff. Not bad. The clerk at the store had recommended them, said they were reputed to help increase orgasm strength. He snorted and placed them around the room in strategic locations. Far be it for him to turn down any assistance. After lighting each one and ensuring that there were no fire risks even if they fell asleep, he turned off the lights and moved to the television. It took him a few moments to find an all-music station with a steady stream of rock. Some of his subs had preferred soft or classical music, but those did nothing for him. The solid rhythmic beat of the song thrummed through his veins, ideal for dancing—and fucking. He hoped his lovely wife agreed. Hmm… now he was having second thoughts.

The bathroom door opened and Rickie stepped out, a vision in a lacy blue bra and boy shorts. An image flickered in his mind, an image of their first night together. She’d being wearing very similar lingerie. It had turned him on then as much as it did now. “You look amazing, babe,” he said before he could think better of it. Yeah, he exuded dominance tonight. But when she blushed and sent him a shy smile, he forgave himself. “Come here.”

She took his extended hand and stepped down into the living room, her legs a mile long in the matching high-heeled slipper mules. Everything about his wife was a contradiction. “Do you want me to give you a massage?” she asked, handing him the lotion.