Authors: Lori Foster
Hank cleared his throat, finally freeing her from Eli's stare. He gave her a brisk nod. “I'm a military man myself. I don't recall hearing of any programs like that.”
“It was very hush-hush,” Matt interjected. “And it didn't last that long because the teams became so loyal to each other and so independent of the government, it was felt they were a risk to keep in use. Ray's the perfect example of how things went wrong. If the government had their say, her partner would still be rotting in Central America and they'd still be negotiating.”
Tears burned the backs of her eyes, forcing Ray to blink fast. Oh, she'd gotten Kevin out, but not in time.
Hank said brusquely, “You did the right thing. Can't abandon a partner, now can you?”
Ray didn't know what to say. She glanced at Matt and actually felt his love, his support. He whispered, “You're a hero, sis. No reason to keep it a secret anymore. Not to your new family.”
A new family. Her throat tightened.
“Your family too, Matt.” Lily moved to stand next to Ray. She put her arm around her. “I can't say as I understand all this. Women as mercenaries? It boggles the mind. But I agree with Hank. You did the right thing.”
Ray forced herself to look at Lily. To her own ears, her voice sounded cold and remote. “Most people consider me no more than a hired gun, doing the job I get
paid
to do.”
Hank didn't care. “And why shouldn't you get paid? No one works for free.”
“But she did.” Jeremy had grown solemn throughout the discussion. He studied her in much the same way Eli always did, scrutinizing her so closely she felt exposed. “Why didn't you take the money Eli offered you?”
“I didn't . . . didn't stick to my plan. I broke my own rules.”
“But here I am.” Jeremy held both his hands out to his sides. “At home, having dinner with my family. I'd say you got the job done.”
Having Jeremy defend her felt too weird. “Why the turnaround?” she asked. “Afraid I might decide to get even for all those wisecracks you've made?”
Eli drew her into a hug, squeezing the bluster right out of her. “I told you my brother wasn't a complete idiot, he just has moments of idiocy.”
Jeremy said, “Ha ha.”
Pointing his cane at his youngest grandson, Hank said, “You want her to stay, too, right?”
“Yeah.” Jeremy's smile was slow and genuine and he looked more like Eli than ever. “I think she'll keep Eli on his toes.”
“There you go,” Eli whispered. He tipped up her chin. “We all want you.”
Ray clenched her teeth. Blasted hormonal upheavals, she just knew she was going to start sobbing any second now.
Eli must have known it, too. “Come on. Let's go for a ride. We'll take the horses and I'll show you the property.”
Precious jumped up, ready to follow.
“Do be careful,” Lily warned. “You have to remember she's expecting.”
With her mood swings, no one was likely to forget.
Ray looked at Matt. “You want to come with us?”Ray
“Not this time. I still have to unpack and get settled. Besides, I think I smell dessert.” While Lily rushed to get him a slice of pie, Matt turned to Hankâwho'd been trying to sneak Precious a piece of food under the table. “Was that a collection of WWII memorabilia I saw in the front hall curio cabinet?”
Hank jumped with a guilty start, then gave up and lifted Precious to his lap. The little dog was in heaven.
With everyone else well occupied, Eli tugged Ray out the door to the back porch. The second they were out of sight, he pressed her to the wall and kissed her soundly. Ray could feel him grinning against her lips.
“Stop that, Eli.”
“Don't be a sore loser, Ray.” He locked his arms behind her back, keeping her from pulling away. “Admit it. You expected my grandparents to denounce you on the spot. Instead, you got a huge dose of respect, which you deserve, by the way.”
Ray lowered her head, staring at Eli's chest. “Everything with you and your family is unexpected. Especially Jeremy's new attitude.”
“You'd pasted on that serene expression you wear when you want to hide your feelings.” He smoothed her hair behind her ear, a gesture she'd missed while she'd been away from him. “I could tell you expected to get bombarded with criticism, and I know you'd have taken it on the chin, shoulders straight, head up just like a good soldier. Then when Granddad practically saluted you, you looked ready to expire.” He kissed her again, a loud, smacking kiss on her pursed lips. “Your excuses are disappearing one by one, sweetheart. Why don't you give in gracefully now and agree to marry me?”
She really wanted to. Little by little Eli had made the whole marriage scenario seem pretty appealing. Still staring at his chest, she muttered, “There's more to consider than just your family's opinions.”
Eli bent to see her face. “Such as?”
Raising her brows, Ray said, “My opinion?”
“You're crazy about me. That's all that matters.”
She couldn't help but smile, then admitted, “I am.” And before Eli could take too much joy in that, she added, “I'll even concede that I could get along just fine if we always stayed on the ranch and only had to deal with the few people here. But what happens when you're needed in Chicago or some other office? And how many offices do you head, anyway?”
Eli sighed, taking her hand. “You're determined to find something to nitpick about, aren't you?” He started down the porch steps, heading for the barn. “I have three offices that I visit throughout the year. I can cut back on a lot of my travel, but I'll still have to visit occasionally.”
Ray followed along, noticing how fresh and pure the air smelled. She breathed deeply of the scents of summer flowers and newly mown hay. The sky seemed endless, and the most startling shade of blue she'd even seen. “It's beautiful here. I don't know why you'd ever leave.”
Eli urged her into a large barn, the interior cool and dimly lit. “You weren't here, so there was no reason to stay.”
“I don't want you to change your life for me, Eli.” The words were barely out of Ray's mouth before he pinned her to the rough plank wall, his hands caging her there. His mouth touched her cheek, her chin, finally settling on her lips for a longer, gentler kiss, void of passion, but filled with tenderness.
“You still don't get it, do you, Ray? I
want
my life to change. I want to have you here to come home to. I want a baby that looks like you. Or me. Hell, I don't care if he looks like Jeremy as long as he's mine. I want to take care of you. And,” he added when she started to object, “I want you to take care of me.” He kissed her again, this time with consuming need, his body leaning into her. “Marriage is sharing, Ray. With no one in charge.”
She didn't know how to
not
be in charge.
“Tell me you'll marry me. Please.”
Groaning, Ray laid her head on his shoulder. “I don't know yet if I can be what you want.”
“Damn it, Ray.” Eli gently shook her. “It's not something you have to consciously do. It would be harder for you not to be what I want. The things I love about you aren't things that will change. They're who you are, not what you are.”
Ray went perfectly still. She stared up at Eli, wide-eyed, hardly believing her ears.
He lifted one brow warily. “What is it, sweetheart?”
Feeling unaccountably shy and uncertain, Ray whispered, “You said there were things that you . . . loved?”
Eli looked stunned that he'd admitted it, then he caught her face roughly between his hands. “God, Ray. I didn't want to scare you, but . . . hell yes, I love everything about you. Too damn many things to repeat.”
“Such as?”
His smile was tender; and the emotion, it was all there in his gaze again. He had the most expressive eyes she'd ever seen. She'd noticed them the very first time she'd met him, within seconds of walking into that smoky bar which seemed at least two lifetimes ago.
“I love your temper and your loyalty. Your pride and protectiveness. Your honesty. Your confidence and strength and sense of responsibility.”
Ray laughed, feeling a little self-conscious.
“I love your sassy walk and your lack of modesty, the way you seem so oblivious to your attractiveness.” His eyes darkened. “And your delectable, healthy body. I especially love it. And the way you make love to me and with me. Andâ”
Ray smashed her hand over his mouth. “You're being outrageous, Eli.”
He bit her palm, a small, damp love bite that had her catching her breath and groaning.
“I'm being honest,” he said when she pulled her hand away. “Why don't you be honest, too? With yourself and with me.”
His deep husky voice sank into her. All her reasons for keeping herself apart, for protecting her heart against Eli, were slowly being chipped away. Besides, it was already too late for denials. She'd loved Eli almost from the beginning. “Eli . . .”
A loud commotion in the outer yard drew their attention. Eli's name was called and he looked up with a distracted frown just as the barn doors were thrown open.
Jeremy peered at each of them, took in the intimacy of their positions, and turned slightly away, offering them a modicum of privacy. “Sorry for interrupting. Ted's here with a new mare.”
Eli cursed. “I forgot about the mare. Tell him I'll be right out.”
“Sure.” Jeremy coughed. “Jane just pulled up, too.”
Groaning, Eli said, “Tell her I'll be with her as soon as I get a chance.”
Ray waited until Jeremy left before narrowing her gaze on Eli. “I thought you talked to Jane.”
“I did. She's probably here on business.” Suddenly Eli grinned. “You have no reason to be jealous, Ray.”
It felt like her spine would snap, she grew so stiff. “Jealous? As if I would be.”
Eli smoothed his hand over her cheek, his expression mournful. “I'm sorry we have to cancel the ride.”
Ray shrugged. “No big deal. I already did some exploring earlier.”
“This time would have been more fun.”
“Yeah? How so?”
“I was planning to take you to the other side of the hill, strip you buck naked, and make love to you in the shade of a huge oak tree.” His eyes glowed. “I need you, Ray.”
His words made her breathless, but still she managed a chuckle. “Poor baby. Wouldn't your grandparents understand if you slipped into my room?”
“No, they wouldn't.”
“Then maybe we can take a long walk tonight.” Ray ran her finger down his chest and admitted, “I need you, too.”
Eli sucked in a deep breath. “Damn.” He kissed her one more time, and without another word, walked away. Ray took a moment to dwell on Eli's declaration of love. He'd told her he cared, and she knew he wanted the baby, but love? She hadn't expected it, but then, much of what had happened since meeting Eli Connors was unexpected.
Eli loved her, and Matt claimed she could do anything that she set her mind to. So maybe she could make this all work. She still didn't want to drive a minivan, but maybe she could get used to an SUV. It wouldn't be a truck, but at least it'd hold the paraphernalia associated with babies, like strollers and diaper bags and such.
Considering that the kid would already have great-grandparents, a wonderful father, and a pony or two to boot, it might just work out okay.
R
ay left the barn just in time to see Eli and another man leading the new mare away. Jane was with them, walking close to Eli, brushing up against him. Eli stayed busy talking to the man and seemed to be ignoring her.
Several other men were now loitering around the fence, probably done working for the day. They boldly stared when Ray walked into view.
Not understanding their rudeness, Ray started to frown. Then she saw Jeremy striding toward her. When he reached her, he stepped between her and the other men.
“Could I talk to you a minute?”
Ray took in his anxious expression. “About what?”
“Actually . . . I wanted to apologize.”
Ray just waited, not bothering to make it easier on him.
He cleared his throat. “I've been a jerk. Being rescued by a woman . . .” He rubbed the back of his neck. His unease was almost palpable, but he continued. “It's not a good excuse, but I was scared half to death and you came in like an avenging angel and it made me feel like a coward. You aren't afraid of anyone or anythingâ”
Ray cut him off there. “I wasn't afraid of that situation because it's familiar to me. It wasn't familiar to you. But Jeremy, everyone is afraid of something.”
“Not you.”
“You don't think so?” She made a face and found herself confiding to the most unlikely ally. “I'm scared to death of having this baby.”
His eyes widened. “But I'm sure it'll be fine! You're as healthy as a horseâ” She slanted him an amused look and he winced. “Sorry. I didn't mean that as an insult. It's just that you're in such great shape, and Eli can afford the best medical care.”
“I don't mean that part of it. I mean . . . trying to be a good mother.”
He blinked at her twice, then his shoulders relaxed and he smiled. “Every kid in the world would consider you the coolest mom around. Like Wonder Woman or one of Charlie's Angels. And hey, being afraid of that is at least understandable. It's a big responsibility. But I was afraid of a bug.”
Wonder Woman? Ray grinned. “Tarantulas are not mere bugs. It took me a while to get used to them, too.”
Jeremy twisted his mouth. “They're . . . hairy.”
Ray shuddered. “I know. Nasty, huh?”
Someone laughed behind them, interrupting their new camaraderie. Ray looked over her shoulder and saw that the men who'd been ogling her earlier had come closer. One in particular leaned arrogantly against the fence, eyeing her up and down.
Jeremy said, “Oh, hell.”
“Ignore them,” Ray said, loud enough for the men to hear.
“Better listen to the lady, Jeremy, or she just might whoop up on you.”
Jeremy turned fully to face the man taunting him. In a low voice, he said to Ray, “Mike and the other two came along with the new mare. They'll be out of here soon enough.”
Mike asked, “Isn't she the lady soldier you've been talking about? I see what you mean now, Jeremy. She looks real mean.” A round of laughter followed that observation, and Ray felt herself stiffen in indignation.
Mike stepped closer. “Honey, you can toss me around any time you want.”
Jeremy looked ready to expire. Ray put her hand on his shoulder. “They'll get tired of acting like fools pretty soon.”
Jeremy shook his head. “Eli is going to kill me if he hears what they're saying.”
He looked genuinely upset now, glancing around to see if Eli was coming back. Ray sighed, feeling totally put upon. “Why would Eli be mad at you?”
Jeremy rolled his eyes. “Because I'm the one who told them about you.”
Suspicions rose. “You didn't tell some far-fetched lies about me, did you?”
Jeremy gave her an incredulous look. “Why would I need to? The truth is outrageous enough.”
Ray laughed derisively. “So it is.” Then she took Jeremy's arm in an iron grip, smiling maliciously. “Why don't we go inside now, Jeremy? If we're not here to harass, they'll probably find something else to amuse themselves with.”
“What are you going to do?”
“Don't worry. I've never murdered anyone yet. Though I'll admit you give the idea new appeal.”
“I know I've got a lot to apologize for.”
“No big deal.”
“Then you don't care that they know?”
“I'm not ashamed of what I do, Jeremy.” She peered up at him. “But I have a feeling you didn't exactly paint me in a fair light.”
He looked embarrassed. “No. Probably not,” he admitted. “At the time, I was still stinging from being rescued by you.”
“Now, don't go looking so long in the face. I'm not going toâ”
Ray didn't get to finish. Mike latched onto her arm. “Jeremy says you're real talented. If you wanted to jump me, I promise to hold still.”
He was laughing at his own jest. Jeremy started to step forward, but Ray stopped him.
As she always did, she considered the situation and how best to handle it. The big, muscled oaf in front of her wouldn't be any problem at all. And to avoid further harassment, she should probably teach him, and the onlookers, a lesson. Otherwise, she'd be putting up with the gibes for years.
Assuming she'd be here for years.
She took a step back.
“Now, honey, don't go hiding from me. I just wanted to tussle with you a little.”
“Hide?” Ray grinned, already enjoying herself. “I'm just clearing a spot.”
“For what?”
“For you to fall.”
Mike blinked at her, then roared with laughter, looking to his friends and including them in his humor.
Ray shook her hands, getting loose. “You ready?”
“Baby, I was born ready.”
“Good.” So fast that Mike didn't have a chance to react, Ray hit his shoulder, his chest, and his stomachâthen kicked his legs out from under him.
As she'd planned, he went down.
His friends really found that hilarious. Mike didn't. He jumped back up, and again Ray hit him three times, dodging his big hands when he reached for her. After several stinging blows, one an insulting slap to his forehead, she ended up behind him, and this time she planted a foot in the seat of his pants, sending him face first into the dirt.
“Holy shit, she's good,” one of the men said.
“I can't wait to tell everyone else.”
Mike cursed and jumped back up to his feet.
Still grinning, Ray asked, “Had enough?”
He curled his lip, swiping dust off his chest and seat. “You damned bitch.”
At the insult, Jeremy barked, “That's enough. You better back off right now.”
As if sensing an easier victory, Mike rounded on Jeremy. “Who says? You?”
Jeremy took an aggressive step forward. Ray sincerely hoped she wouldn't end up having to defend him. But he proved a little smarter than she'd first suspected.
He threatened the man with Eli.
“You're talking to my future sister-in-law. How do you think Eli will feel about you bothering her?”
Mike looked stunned. “Eli is marrying her?”
“He is.”
“Well, you never told us that.” He glanced around the yard in a rush. “How was I supposed to know?”
“You know now.”
Mike turned to Ray. “No offense intended.”
“None taken.” Seeing the man's unease, Ray started to wonder what Eli's reaction would be toward her.
She'd only been at his house a day and she was already making mincemeat of his friends. The more she considered it, the more apprehensive she became. She'd been wrong to goad the man into a confrontation and she knew it. She was pregnant, and pregnant women surely had to show more restraint.
That thought brought anotherâof her fat and round and unable to fight. The image wasn't a pleasant one.
As Mike started to walk away, taking his friends with him, Jeremy let out a sigh of relief. “Look, Ray Jeanâ”
The day's anxiety had taken its toll.
Jeremy only had time to gasp before he found himself caught in Ray's grip. She grabbed his arm and brought her leg up behind his knee. He landed on the ground, flat on his back, dust billowing around him and Ray looming over him. She came down quickly, her knee landing on his chest.
“Never, absolutely never, call me Ray Jean. I've taken a lot off you, Jeremy. But enough is enough.”
Jeremy nodded while doing his best not to chuckle.
Provoked, Ray pushed down with her weight on her knee, making Jeremy gasp. “You think this is funny?”
He shook his head, nearly choking on his humor. “No.” The word was strangled and Ray let up a little. Then Jeremy smiled. “I was just wondering if you'd ever done this to Eli. You have, haven't you?” A murmur rose from the onlookers, but Ray and Jeremy both ignored it. “That's probably why he fell in love with you.”
Ray sat back on her heels, totally bemused. “You Connors men are a strange breed, do you know that?”
Jeremy laughed while rubbing his chest. “Ah, can I get up now?”
Disgusted, Ray said, “Yeah, all right.”
He sat up beside her. “Before I can ask if all's forgiven, I'm afraid I have something else to apologize for, too.”
Ray dropped her head forward. “I don't want to hear this.”
“I was the one who invited Jane here. I, uh, sort of suggested she try to seduce Eli. You know, make him see what a mistake he was making.”
Ray turned her face away.
“Of course, that was before I realized it wasn't a mistake at all.”
Suspiciously, Ray asked, “You don't want him and Jane to get together after all?”
“Are you kidding? Who would teach me how to fight like you do?”
Matt said from behind them, “I will.”
There was a definite touch of menace in his tone.
Leaning on one arm, Ray twisted in his direction. She discovered that not only had Matt joined them, so had the man who'd brought the mare, Eli, and Jane. Oh hell. She had a damned audience.
Slowly, Ray came to her feet.
Eli wasn't just looking at her. No, he was staring at Mike, at the dirt on his clothes and the red handprint on his head. “What the hell is going on?”
As if to exonerate himself, Mike held up his hands. “I was just teasing her.”
Eli's eyes went cold. In a deadly whisper, he asked, “Did you touch her?”
“No!” Looking around for help and not finding any, Mike stammered, “She . . . well, she sort ofâ”
“Kicked your ass?” Matt supplied.
Eli looked so furious, Ray rushed to reassure him. “I didn't hurt him, Eli.”
Eli barely spared her a glance. “I've warned you before, Mike. This is the last time.”
He'd had trouble with Mike before? Well, that made her feel better.
The man who'd accompanied Eli to the barn appeared furious. “All of you, get in the truck.” And then to Eli, “I'm sorry. He can be such an obnoxious ass, but he's good with horses.”
“He won't be if I see him again.”
The man nodded. “Understood. I'll keep him away.” Then he, too, left.
With the day deteriorating, Ray felt guilty and defensive. “There's no reason for all the fuss. I didn't hurt him.”
Eli raised a brow. “He might disagree.”
Watching Mike limp away, Ray couldn't argue.
“Don't worry about it. He's a bully and a jerk and I don't like him.” Eli turned to Jeremy, still sitting on the dusty ground. “And what happened to you?”
Jeremy cleared his throat. “Uh, Ray and I had a little disagreement.”
Incredulous, Eli said,
“You
were fighting with her, too?”
Ray stepped in front of Jeremy. Damn it, she was starting to feel protective of the twerp. “There was no fight to it.” Then she shifted the blame. “You've done a lousy job of teaching your brother, Eli.”
Matt said, “I'll be glad, even eager, to instruct him.” There was blood in his eyes.
“He didn't touch me, Matt, so knock it off.”
Jane gave a snicker of amusement. “You really have been out here brawling in the dirt with men?” She managed to squeeze closer to Eli, pressing her breasts into his arm. “Unbelievable. But then, you are some sort of . . . well,
mercenary,
aren't you?”
She made it sound like a dirty word and Ray decided she'd had enough. Very slowly, with measured movements, she started forward. Her eyes never left Jane's face.
Eli sighed in vexation, then, while trying to pry Jane loose, he softly warned, “Ray, you're grinning.”
“So?”
“So that means you want to fight.” He said it as if she should have already known that. “But I don't thinkâ”
She cut him off. “Forget it, Eli. You wanted me. You dragged me here and wouldn't let up for a single minute, even though I told you it wouldn't work out. Well, now you've got me. For good. And that means you're hands-off to other women. And most especially to her.”
Chuckling, Jeremy hauled himself upright to stand next to Matt. “Will you really teach me to fight like Ray does?”
Matt shrugged, but his eyes never left his sister. “Why not?”
Eli sighed. “There isn't going to be any fighting.”
“You don't think so?” Ray took another step forward, which sent Jane into a panic.
Harassed, Eli said, “Jane, for God's sake . . . Ray, stop terrorizing her . . . Matt, will you stop laughing.” He was doing his best to get away from Jane and still give his attention to Ray. “You know you're not going to hurt her, Ray.”
“And why not?”
“Because you're honorable and you fight fair.”
“Wrong. I fight to win.”
“But you've already won me,” he reminded her with a smile.
Ray wasn't appeased. “Maybe you should have informed your girlfriend of that.” She nodded her head at Jane. “She could have been spared this little scene.”