Unforgiven (6 page)

“Then I guess you’ll just have to act younger than your age, go with us, and have a good time. Feel free to leave the brain-dead girlfriend here.” Jess stood and smirked at him, pulled the sarong from her waist, and started for the water. Bailey remained by his side for a moment, awkwardly fidgeting, before she finally stood and peeled her white shorts down her legs as he watched.

“You could come with us tonight. Might be fun.” He had no doubt it would be fun with Bailey there. He enjoyed spending time with her just a bit too much. Always had, even when they were kids. They’d always talked easily, laughed a lot, and been close. He used to think of her as an extra sister who he actually got along with, and then she became the cute teen he avoided because she was too young to have a crush on. Now she was just the pretty young woman who was still just a bit too young but who he very much had a crush on. He didn’t even bother trying to keep his interactions with her to a minimum because he just plain didn’t want to. And on spring break when Jess had begged him to go in with her and Bailey on a vacation house they couldn’t afford on their own, what was a big brother to do? He also didn’t much like the idea of Jess and Bailey being in Galveston alone. They might technically be adults, but it did not mean they acted like it. He wasn’t at all sure he did either, for that matter. He was certain of it, in fact, after the night before.

He watched her black bikini-clad ass walk down to the water’s edge. She stood with her legs shoulder-width apart, and he studied the perfect proportion of her legs. She had fit legs from years of running. They ran together at least a few times a week on campus, so he was very familiar with her build. Her bottom was as tight as her legs, and his groin was tightening with every passing second. He didn’t just like spending time with her too much; he just plain wanted her too much to. It was entirely physical; it was also entirely more than just that.

She glanced back once, catching him staring at her. From that distance she couldn’t possibly know he was staring at her ass, though he wasn’t sure it really mattered; he was just plain staring at something he had no business staring at. He climbed up from his spot, thanking God she was too far away to see his raging hard-on, and he headed back up to the house as she joined Jess in the water.

Trinity nearly caught him with his dick in his hand when he gave into the temptation of letting his mind wander away to Bailey for a while. And it wasn’t just Bailey. It was naked Bailey, aroused Bailey, willing and wanting Bailey. She’d watched him fuck his girlfriend for a reason last night, and while alcohol might have played a part on both of their accounts, there was more to it than that. She wanted to see him, she wanted to watch, and it was her want that was driving his arousal as he stood in the bathroom staring into the mirror as the shower heated up.

Trinity wrapping her hand around the length of his shaft from behind him was an unwelcome interruption. “Looks like someone’s been thinking about me.” Her hand was gliding up and down along his hard length, but he was struggling to deal with the feel of her hand on his skin.

“Sorry, Trinity. I can’t do this right now.” He peeled her hand away from him and brushed past her as he stepped into the shower.

He and Trinity weren’t going anywhere. He and pretty much every girl he tried to get involved with never seemed to go anywhere. He ended up bored more often than not, and he just wasn’t sure there was any point. He was going to spend the vast majority of his time, waking and otherwise, in the hospital starting the following year, and residency after that wouldn’t be much better. He wasn’t even sure why he asked women out anymore. It would likely be more respectful to just have random one-night stands. At least then he could avoid dumping them later on when he realized, yet again, he was just bored and unsatisfied. He was starting to think maybe he was an asshole.

He’d want to kill a man who did the same to Jess, though it was almost easier to think of her pulling that move on a guy rather than the other way around. He would most definitely kill a man for doing it to Bailey. Bailey wasn’t Jess. She was . . . well, he didn’t know what she was. But she wasn’t brazen and loud like Jess. She also wasn’t weak. They were as opposite as could be, but they were attached at the hip. Jess was jealously protective of Bailey, an inclination Darren understood well, and Bailey brought a sense of softness to Jess that she didn’t naturally have on her own.

All it took was a glare from Bailey to silence Jess when she was being loud and outlandish. Next came the, “Okay, okay, sorry” as Jess rolled her eyes, but it was the restraint that Bailey inspired in her best friend that was most amazing. She gave Jess maturity and thoughtfulness, and in return, Jess gave her undying devotion and support.

By the time Darren stepped back out from the shower, he’d still not stopped thinking about Bailey, analyzing her, obsessing about her. He’d simply spent entirely too much time with her this week. He ended up flopping down on his bed and falling asleep. He wasn’t that tired, a bit hung over perhaps, but the nap was more to stop his brain from thinking about a woman a bit too young for him, a bit too close to him, and just plain too fucking much for him. The fact was, he cared just a bit too much for her to subject her to his brand of relationship. He couldn’t hurt her.

He avoided her for the rest of the day by staying in his room, working on his laptop, and getting ahead on some reading for his ethics class. But come late evening, it was time. He dressed in jeans and a simple gray T-shirt, and he headed to the kitchen. Trinity came in a few minutes later, smelling of perfume, plastered perfectly with makeup, and her hair looking like something on a Barbie doll. She looked at him wearily. She obviously wasn’t thrilled about being rejected earlier in the day, but that was all lost on him when Jess and Bailey walked in together.

Jess was wearing a short, too short, jean skirt, skimpy summer tank top, and wedge sandals, and Bailey was wearing a white, strapless sundress. The skirt was flirty and the bodice fitted, leaving him studying the fabric to see if he could see her nipples beneath. Nothing but her small tits and the tight fit of the bodice were holding it up, and he was in hell knowing how much attention this was going to garner. The skirt hit a few inches above her knees, not nearly so short as Jess’ skirt, but plenty to leave little to the imagination, and while her sandals didn’t have quite the high wedge Jess’ sandals did, they were plenty tall to draw his eyes to her legs. These two were definitely going to be getting in some trouble tonight.

Bailey smiled at him, but it was a shy smile. “Well, this promises to be a great night,” he muttered as he snatched the keys up from the counter.

Now

“Michelle, I’m just not up for it. I lost my job nearly two weeks ago. I’m broke, I’m going to be homeless soon if I don’t find a way to make money, and my parole officer, bless his heart for being the most patient and kind man in the world, is not happy with me for not disclosing my record to the clinic. It’s just lousy timing.” She’d been trying to get off the phone with Michelle for nearly five damn minutes, but her dear friend, who didn’t hate her guts like everyone else in town, just wasn’t taking no for an answer.

“That’s precisely why you need to come. It’s St. Paddy’s day, Bailey, and you need a night out. It’s my treat. And I’m pretty sure that means you can’t say no. Come on, please? Parade first and then drinks.”

“Drinks.” She was muttering. “Michelle, I just don’t know.” Bailey was starting to get exasperated. She didn’t want to go out and try to have a good time. It never worked. The good times were over, and regardless of how much she might try to recapture them, they were gone for good.

“You can sulk all night, and I won’t even complain. Just go. It’ll do ya some good. Promise.”

“Why do you still insist on being my friend?”

There was silence from the other end of the line. It was a stupid question to ask, but it popped out anyway. When the silence became overly long and awkward, Bailey cleared her throat and opened her mouth to say something. She wasn’t sure what to say, but she opened her mouth anyway, hoping the words would find her. There was nothing easy about the question she asked.

“I’d like to think you’d do the same for me.” The silence set in again, and Bailey’s mouth remained open, fighting to find the right words. “Listen, go with me. Have a good time. Be normal again. Just . . . just fake it till you make it and all that bullshit. Pretend to be happy until it feels right again. Smile, painful as it is, until the smile doesn’t hurt anymore. That’s all I’m asking.”

“That’s all?” Apparently her speechlessness couldn’t compete with her sarcasm.

“That’s all. Just try.”

“Fine. Fuck, I can’t believe I’m letting you talk me into this. Where, when, and how should I dress?”

The squeal from the other end left Bailey pulling the phone back from her ear. Michelle was nothing if not loud. They hung up moments later, and Bailey wandered around her house trying to figure out exactly how to go about pretending to be normal for a night.

Her small cottage in the woods was rented, and it was ridiculously tiny. Didn’t much matter because Bailey had little to nothing to her name, including appropriate clothes for a St. Patrick’s Day parade. She couldn’t even find anything green in her drawers to wear, and after forty-five minutes of literally trying on one outfit, wandering from her bedroom to the mirror on the bathroom door, stripping back out of the outfit and tossing it on the bed in a huff, and then trying on the next item she found in her closet, she collapsed on her bed and gave up.

She settled on a faded pair of jeans and a gray Notre Dame T-shirt she’d had since she was fifteen. It was tight as hell thanks to the fact she was no longer anywhere near fifteen, but she was guessing that actually made it more appropriate for a night out. What the hell did she know about the socially acceptable way for a twenty-seven-year-old to have fun?

Fun. Could she really do this? She wasn’t holding her breath, and as she stared at herself in the mirror after blow-drying her hair and applying a marginal amount of makeup, the pain hit. Amazing how used to pushing it away she’d gotten, but even more amazing was the way it snuck up and slapped her on the face at the most inopportune times. Her eyes teared for a moment, and she cursed her reflection as she shook her head, refusing to give into it.

The knock on her door pulled her out of her funk, and when she pulled the door open for Michelle, she was nearly pummeled to the floor of her cottage as Michelle tackled her for a hug. “Wow. What the hell’d I do to deserve that?”

“You agreed to go out. It’s been way too long.”

“Yeah, well, prison tends to put a crimp in one’s social life.” Bailey spoke through Michelle’s hair that was in her face as she held her in a tight embrace. When Michelle finally released her death grip, she pulled back and beamed at Bailey. “What if we see people we know? I mean, no one wants to see me. And frankly, I don’t want the reminders of just how much everyone in the world hates me except for you.”

“I’ll be there, and I’ll kick anyone’s ass who’s mean to you. We’re going to have some fun. To hell with anyone who wants to stand in our way.” Michelle was still beaming at her, and it was almost easy for Bailey to think for a moment that perhaps she could have a good time.

Michelle was wearing a dress. Of course she was, and she looked damned cute too. She was a good six inches taller than Bailey, and she was slim and lithe. God bless Michelle and her good genes. Suddenly Bailey was rethinking her T-shirt and old tattered jeans, but the second she said something, Michelle stopped her. “Oh, no you don’t. You look fabulous in that perfectly casual sorta way you pull off better than anyone else in the world. I remember that T-shirt. You got it when Jess’ parents took us to the football game. We all got one. Can’t believe you still have it!”

“Well, my clothes have been in storage for a while.” She contemplated for a second before opening her mouth again. “I saw him . . . Darren. Few times now. Can’t seem to stop running into him. ’Course, I tracked him down to yell at him in a parking lot one of those times. . .” She trailed off as she caught the wide-eyed shock on Michelle’s face.

“You . . . well . . . I don’t even know what to say to that.” She was stunned for a moment. “I mean, of course you would run into him at some point. His parents too, I ’spose, but what did he say? What did he . . . do? Was he . . . I don’t know. Civil?”

“He hates me. I mean . . . of course he does.” She shrugged her shoulders. “He got me fired. Not sure if it was intentional or not, but he certainly has no problem with the fact I’m jobless. Sometimes I think I was crazy to come back here. I mean, my lawyer had to actually do lawyerly stuff just to get me paroled back to Savoy from out of state. What the hell was I thinking, and what the hell did I expect? That I could avoid him forever?”

“Stop. This is your home as much as his. Your mom is here, and now that your dad’s gone, she needs you. You have as much right as anyone to be here.”

“Well, I think you and Mom are the only ones who actually believe that. Someone vandalized my bike. My bike! That’s . . . I mean . . . it’s a bike, for fuck sake!” Michelle’s expression was sad, and perhaps a bit stunned. A bike, after all . . .

When they finally made it to the parade, and she caught sight of her nemesis across the street from her almost instantly, she thought certain God was tutting at her in disappointment. Darren did not see her, and as the marching band moved between them, she took the opportunity to watch him. His hatred for her didn’t extend to the rest of the world in any way. He smiled as different people greeted him with a hand clapped on his shoulder. It was too small a community for people not to know the prodigal son who’d come home to such a noble pursuit as ER doctor in their hospital. The town loved him, and he greeted everyone with a friendly smile, but she saw that smile fade quickly when no one was looking, just to be reinvigorated when the next person called his name.

She remembered that smile, and she missed it more than she cared to admit. It was a hard thing being hated by him. She knew she was staring, but Michelle beside her was too busy watching the procession of band members, cheerleaders, firemen, and the like to notice that Bailey was off in a different world. Bailey imagined what life had been before. She let herself feel the warmth and comfort of a world where so many people didn’t hate her. She let herself feel the flutter of nerves as Darren flashed his million-dollar smile at her. None of it was real, but it had been, and she escaped to those memories as she watched him shake hands, wave at people, hug a little old woman who greeted him warmly.