Read Unforgiven (Wanderers #3) Online
Authors: Jessica Miller
Tags: #romance, #paranormal, #young adult, #series, #wanderers
“Ella, you need to back away from him,” Billy said
calmly.
“What’s going on?” Josie asked scared.
“He thinks he’s dreaming,” I said. “He was fine one
minute and then the next he just freaked. He doesn’t believe me
this is real.”
“Tristan,” Billy said. Tristan turned to Billy and
let out another low growl. “He hasn’t fed in weeks, maybe months
even.” Billy took a step back. “Was he just rambling, not really
making any sense?” I nodded not knowing if Billy even noticed. He
never took his eyes off of Tristan. “He’s delusional. When you
don’t feed for long periods of time the mind starts to deteriorate
and you lose comprehension of what’s real and what’s not.”
“Why would someone go that long without feeding
then?” Josie asked.
I took a step in front of Dean and put my hand up
when he went to stop me. “He said he didn’t want to feel anymore,”
I said. It felt like my heart was breaking into a million pieces.
He didn’t want to feel because of me. Why do I always hurt the
people I loved the most? “Everybody out.”
“Ella, are you nuts? We’re not leaving you here alone
with this homicidal maniac,” Dean protested.
“He’s not homicidal. He’s just confused,” I said,
rolling my eyes.
“Ella.”
“Out now,” I said more stern, but Dean refused to
move. “I can handle him. I know what to do. Now get out before I
make you get out,” I growled.
“She’s right. If anyone can handle Tristan it’s
Ella.” Tristan turned his head at the sound of Josie’s voice. He
smiled as if remembering when he bit her. He had a malicious look
in his eyes like he was about to attack. “I think we should leave.
All of us being here is making him on edge,” Josie said, slowly
backing away. She saw the way Tristan was looking at her and she no
longer wanted to be in the same room with him.
“Dean, just please, go,” I said, trying one last time
before I had to use force. “He won’t hurt me.”
I Knew Dean didn’t want to go, but Billy told him he
agreed with Josie. One by one they slowly left the room leaving me
alone with Tristan. I put my hand up and locked the door where I
stood, just in case. Then I turned to face Tristan. I took a small
step toward him. He flinched and took one back. “Tristan, I’m not
going to hurt you, but you have to calm down and listen to me
carefully.” I took another small step toward him. “You are not
dreaming.” He growled at me and I put my hands up.
I knew I had to think of something else quick. I
remembered there was still some left over blood Billy had stock for
me in the fridge. I never finished it. I just had to manage to get
to the fridge and get the bottle to him before he lost it and
turned on me. “Okay, I’m going to walk over here and get you
something to drink,” I said, keeping my hands up.
He followed me with his eyes and took a step toward
the bed. I slowly opened the fridge and as soon as he got a whiff
his eyes started to glow. I froze for a second. He took a step
closer to me and then another. I looked in the fridge. There was
one bottle left. Hopefully that would be enough for the time being.
I reached in and took out the bottle. Then I slowly moved toward
him.
He flew at me in a flash and took the bottle from my
hands draining it to the last drop. When he was done he dropped the
bottle and recognition flashed in his eyes again. He fell to his
knees and buried his face in his hands. “What have I done?” he
cried.
I knelt down in front of him. “Tristan…Tristan, look
at me.”
“I can’t,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m too
ashamed.”
I knew I had to convince him to listen to me before
he turned again. If he really hadn’t fed as long as Billy said that
small amount of blood wouldn’t be enough. He might start to lose
his mind again. “Tristan, you did nothing wrong. Please look at
me.” I pulled his hands away from his face. He had tears in his
eyes. I helped him up and led him over to the bed and sat down.
“Tristan, you need to feed. That’s the only way you’re going to
understand what’s going on.”
“No, I’m fine now.”
“That wasn’t enough,” I said, wondering where I was
going to get more. Then it hit me. The only way I was going to be
able to bring him back and have him truly believe I loved him was
to let him fed from me. “Tristan,” I turned his face toward me. “I
want you to bite me.”
“No,” he stood up from the bed. “I won’t.”
“It’s the only way I can convince you I’m telling you
the truth. It’s the only way for you to know how I truly feel.”
“Ella I can’t,” he said, backing away.
“Yes you can.” I stood up and moved toward him.
“Ella, you don’t know what you’re asking. I haven’t
fed in months. Not since…” I took his hand knowing exactly when he
was talking about. “I could…I could kill you.”
“No you won’t. I trust you. It’s the only way,” I
said, tightening my grip on his hand. I brushed my hair off my
shoulder and tilted my head to the side.
“Ella…please,” he begged.
“It’s the only way you’ll believe me that this is
real. That my feelings for you are real.” I knew he wouldn’t do it
voluntarily so I cut my neck with my nail – taking the expression
hard as nails to a whole new level. I took a step closer, allowing
the blood to trickle down my neck. He resisted at first, but I knew
all too well the call of it was hard not to give into. The aroma,
when it first hits your nose. The sound of it pumping through the
veins and steady beat of the heart pounding in your chest.
Tristan’s eyes glowed and his fangs came down on my
neck. He bit down so hard I flinched and had to remind myself to
not pull away. It was rough at first, but then the sensation hit me
like a wave. I opened up my mind so he could see inside. So he
would know how I felt, truly felt about him and know once and for
all he wasn’t dreaming.
He wrapped his arms around me. Gentle at first and
then he pulled me in tighter, deepening his fangs. I opened my
mouth and gasped at the wonderful sensation. I thought I was going
to faint – not from the loss of blood, but from the way I was
feeling.
My body started to go limp and Tristan pulled back
instantly. “Ella?” he said panicked. I smiled lazily and reached up
to touch his face. My head was spinning and I was in a total state
of bliss. Tristan picked me up and carried me to the bed. “Oh Ella,
I’m so sorry. I never should have –”
“Shh,” I said, pressing my finger to his lips.
“You’re killing my buzz.” I closed my eyes and tried to enjoy my
euphoria. When I opened my eyes Tristan was staring at me with a
worried expression. I sat up slowly, still a little dazed. I placed
my hands on the sides of his face and pulled his lips to mine,
pulling him down on top of me.
He pulled back and just looked at me. “Ella, I had no
idea…I’m sorry you had to hurt like that. If I would have known you
know I would have…”
“I know Tristan,” I said softly.
“Ella, I’m sorry I hurt you.”
“It’s not your fault. Let’s not talk about it. I’m
just glad you now know how I truly feel about you.”
“I do,” he smiled.
“I love you Tristan.”
“I love you too la mia
bella stella.”
I knew it was wrong
,
but at
the moment it felt so right. I wasn’t sure if you would call it
cheating because technically Tristan was my boyfriend, even though
I did breakup with him, but then we got back together – sorta – and
then he died, but not really. I was also pretty sure after our
conversation, Roman wanted nothing to do with me, but it still felt
wrong. I didn’t know where we stood and I couldn’t do this not
knowing.
I pulled back. “Tristan,” he smiled and started to
kiss my neck. “Tristan, we need to stop.” He continued to kiss my
neck. “Tristan, you have to stop that. It’s really
distracting.”
“You really want me to stop?”
No, I didn’t, but I had to. I didn’t think I could
tell him the real reason, but I knew I had to stop him before it
went further. “Tristan, can we just talk, for a little.”
He paused. I could still feel his breath on my neck.
He pulled back slowly. I was afraid to look at him. “You want to
talk?”
“Yes. I just think we need to wait. I mean, I just
found you and there’s so much I want to tell you.”
He sighed, sitting up. “Okay, let’s talk, while I
undress you.”
“Tristan,” I rolled my eye and tried not to smile. “I
just can’t right now.” He looked at me a little concerned.
“Please…for me.”
“Okay.” He tried to smile, but I could still see the
disappointment on his face.
That hurt more than I thought it would. I finally
found him and all I could do was sit there and stare. I wanted to
do so much more. I wanted him to hold me in his arms and tell me he
would never let me go. I wanted him to tell me we would be together
and this was the start of our new life, but in the back of my head
I had that little voice that kept whispering Roman’s name.
I let out a sigh and got up off the bed. I walked
past the mirror and caught a glimpse of the bite marks Tristan had
left on my neck. I didn’t realize had badly he had bitten down
until I saw how swollen and bruised I was. I pointed to the two
small puncture wounds on my neck. “Do you mind?”
He got and joined me by the dresser. Then he placed
his hand gently on my neck. “You know how stupid that was? I could
have killed you.” He pulled his hand away from my healed neck,
looking at me concerned. I tried to smile, but it felt forced. We
stood there silently for a moment. Not sure where to go from there.
“What is so pressing that it can’t wait until tomorrow?” he
asked.
“I just…I mean, why rush?”
I knew he could tell I was hiding something, but he
didn’t push. “Alright, if you want to talk, let’s talk.”
He looked back over at the bed. “How about we sit
here,” I said, gesturing to the couch.
He looked at me funny, but didn’t argue. He took my
hands and pulled me over to the couch to have a seat. I had a seat
at the opposite end of the couch not able to trust myself. “Is
everything okay?” I nodded afraid my voice would betray me. “Then
why do I feel like you’re trying to pull away from me?”
“I’m not…I…it’s just all so real I still can’t
believe it.” That was the truth at least.
“Come here.” He held out his arms for me. I
reluctantly slid next to him and allowed him to wrap his arms
around me. I was more confused than ever. I loved Tristan. I wanted
to be with him, but I still loved Roman too. I felt like my heart
was being ripped in half. I clenched my fists close to my chest
fighting back the tears. Tristan wrapped his arms around me tighter
sensing my pain. He just held me for a little while. When I felt
like I could breathe again, he let me go. “Tell me what’s going on
with you.”
“Where do you want me to start?”
“Well I already know you have the power to heal.”
“Um, yeah, that’s not all.” He looked at me confused.
“I can also move things with my mind.” I demonstrated by moving one
of the pillows from the bed over to me. I hugged it tightly to my
chest for comfort, putting some distance between Tristan and
me.
“That’s not uncommon to have more than one.”
“That’s not all.” He scrunched his brow. “I can also
read minds, put up a shield, and even sometimes glow.”
“That’s um…” he looked for the right words, but I
knew he was struggling, and at the same time trying not to think
about anything I would be able to pick up in case I was telling the
truth about being able to read minds. “When you say you glow?”
“I literally glow. My whole body does, like a bluish
silver color. It only happened a few times and each time I was
using a lot of power. Ms. Kraft was working with me to try and
figure out what caused it and why it was happening, but we couldn’t
find anything,” I shrugged.
“Ms. Kraft?”
“She’s one of my teachers at Hamilton Hill.”
“I see you actually took my advice and went to that
school.”
“Hate to burst your bubble, but I more or less didn’t
have much of a choice. My dad told me I had to go to the school or
basically be a prisoner for the rest of my life.” Just the mention
of my dad made me mad. I looked down and picked at the corners of
the pillow, thinking about the fight with my dad.
“Hey, what’s the matter?” Tristan asked, leaning
closer to me.
“I had a really bad fight with my dad,” I said. No
longing caring about being good, I threw the pillow to the floor
and crawled on to his lap. I just wanted him to hold me, to feel
his arms around me.
“I’m sure whatever it was it will blow over,” he said
as he stroked my hair.
“I don’t think so. Not this time.”
“You want to tell me about it?”
I sighed and pulled back. “When he found out I left
school and came here to look for you he got really pissed.”
“You shouldn’t have left school,” he agreed.
I narrowed my eyes at him. “That’s beside the point,”
I argued.
“I’m sorry.” He kissed my forehead making me melt and
forget my anger. “I’m sure he’ll get over it.”
“He told me if I didn’t come home with him that I
shouldn’t bother coming home at all.”
“Ella, you know he didn’t really mean that. I’m sure
he just said it out of anger.”
I picked at my pajama pants. “I don’t
know…maybe.”
“How about we talk about something else?”
Tristan knew me well enough to know when to let
things go and move on. I was thankful for the change in subject. “I
met your cousin, Josef.”
“You met Josef?” he said surprised.
“And your grandmother,” I said, grinding my
teeth.
“So how’d that go?” he asked, smiling.
“She made me work in the garden all morning while she
watched and then made me clean the kitchen.” Tristan turned his
head to try and hide his laugh. “It’s not funny. She was mean and
very judgmental and she doesn’t even know me.”