Union of Sin (5 page)

“I’m right behind you.” She was following, no matter how stunted her steps.

Curiosity had her enthralled, but there was something that began to concern her. She’d memorized every inch of the main room, taken a glimpse into the two private areas, and not once had she caught sight of her husband.

* * * * *

“Are you coming down to the party?”

T.J. squeezed his eyes shut and massaged his lids, ignoring the question for as long as he could. Shay wouldn’t leave him alone. She hovered. Everywhere. All the time. No matter where he went, she was in his tracks with a friendly smile and a comforting pat on his back. He loathed it. The old Shay, the one who’d talked smack and given him hell, was the woman he needed. Not this highly attuned, feminine ball of emotional support that kept him on edge.

“I’ll get down there when I’m ready.” The growl of his voice echoed through the empty Shot of Sin dance club. He liked the peace and quiet. And he deserved the loneliness.

“Did you think about what I said in the restaurant yesterday?”

He couldn’t forget. Shay’s idea of getting over his wife was to move on. Hop on the bike again, so to speak. Take a new woman for a test drive. Brute concurred, ever the heartless bastard.

The thought made him sick.

“Why don’t we talk about you for a change?” He dropped his hand from his face and straightened at the sight of her. She was adorned in a see-through black dress, her shiny red bra and panties visible beneath to match her glossy high heels. She wore a swatch of black lace over her eyes. Simple yet elegant.
Beautiful.

“How are things with you and Leo?” He spoke to hide his discomfort. Seeing Shay like this wasn’t something he could get used to overnight. She’d been his friend for a long time. His employee even longer. Now he’d have to watch as she strutted her gorgeous body around the Vault on her nights off.

She rolled her pretty brown eyes. “You know, you could just tell me you don’t want to talk.”

Perfect.
“I don’t want to talk about it, Shayna.” His glare was far harsher than his tone. He couldn’t help it. He was tired—his heart, his body and his mind. Enough was enough.

“No problem.” She raised her chin, the defiance of the woman he used to know coming back in full force.

“So how about you and Leo? What did I miss while I was away?”

She waggled her brows. “A lot of debauchery.”

No way. Leo was taking it slow, unwilling to risk scaring Shay away from the lifestyle. “Are you fucking with me?”

“Yes.” Her smile was bright. “We’re taking our relationship day by day.”

“But you’re enjoying yourself.” He could see it in the undiluted happiness of her features. She was no longer opposed to the Vault. The realization stung. Why couldn’t it have turned out this way for him and Cass? Why did he have to ruin what they could’ve been?

Because he couldn’t help fucking up.

“I’m glad the two of you are working things out.” He hadn’t been able to do the same with his wife. The guilt was too heavy, the weight of regret a constant punishment. Everything else that followed was like an avalanche burying the happiness he’d once had. “I suppose I better get downstairs and show Leo and Brute I’m not slacking off.”

He pushed from the stool and strode to her. “I hope you’re right about this masquerade party.”

She flashed him a confident smile. “I am.”

He followed her down the stairs to the Vault. They passed people in the hall, couples, singles, some dressed in evening attire, others already in lingerie and making their way back into the main part of the club. All of them wore masks to partially or completely hide their faces.

“Hey, Zoe,” Shay called out.

Zoe James, one of their regulars, sauntered toward them. “I’m loving this masquerade idea.”

She wore a flattering shimmery dress, her sexy attire matching her equally appealing personality. However, it was her companion, the dark-haired woman lingering behind her, that caught his attention.

Her inability to hold his gaze confirmed her club virginity before his focus had a chance to rest on her wristband. The poor woman was distraught, her wringing hands another indication of her anxiety.

If it were any other day, maybe he would’ve tried to offer support. A welcoming smile or an indication for Shay to show her around. But there was something about her that put him on edge. She was
too
nervous, her gaze lowering almost as if in submission as he scrutinized her.

Did he know her? Something inside him sparked familiarity, yet he couldn’t place her features. He usually noticed the blondes. Ones who didn’t need to bolster their confidence behind a mask of bright lipstick and dark eye makeup. This woman was a poser. The type to boost her esteem through a fake façade.

So why was he suddenly comparing her features to his wife?
Fuck.
He needed to ditch the matrimonial titles and remember Cassie was destined to be his ex.

A new wave of hurt hit him as he tore his gaze away and massaged his forehead to fight the lingering thoughts. “I gotta get going.” He maneuvered around them, not chancing another glance at the woman. “I’ll see you all inside.”

This was what it had been like all week. All month. Every woman reminded him of Cassie. Every shadow was hers. She was already haunting him, and there was nothing he could do about it. Not that he wanted to rid himself of her presence. The memories, although painful, were also a blessing. Without her, he was nothing.

He entered a four-digit code into the panel at the closed door at the end of the hall and yanked the heavy wood open. Pleasure bombarded him. Not his own, unfortunately. The fulfillment of others surrounded him as he strode through the newbie area and into the main room of Vault of Sin.

He inclined his head at guests, recognizing some and completely oblivious to the identity of others as he maneuvered around patrons. Beds were already in use, their occupants participating in varying degrees of flirtation, foreplay and sex.

Leo was behind the bar, dressed the same as T.J. in a suit and tie—standard attire for Vault staff.

Leo jerked his head in greeting. “I’m glad you came.”

“Was there ever any doubt?”

He hated the diminished respect Leo and Brute had tried to hide due to his time off. Since returning, they tiptoed around him, treating him like a casual part of the ownership team instead of an equal partner.

“Maybe a little.”

T.J. winced. “Well, I’m here. What do you need me to do?”

“Want to take over helping Travis while I do a walk-around? Brute will be finished assisting security at the door soon. Then I think the two of us should relax and take the night off.” A smirk curled the corner of Leo’s lips. “You never know, you might find someone willing to occupy your time.”

“Yeah, whatever.” He ignored yet another hint to move on from his wife.
His ex.
He’d never get used to calling Cassie that.

They didn’t understand. If you fell off a bike and skinned your knee, you got straight back on to fight the childish fear. If you shattered your marriage, devastating not only your own life, but also the future of the one person who would forever hold your heart, you didn’t slide straight back into the dating pool. You waited for the burn to heal. You waited for the shattered parts of your soul to return from wherever the fuck they’d fled to, so you could finally sleep at night and gain some perspective that wasn’t tarnished by the psychotic ramblings of insomnia.

Or maybe you didn’t. Maybe you cut and run. How the hell did he know? Was it best to take a shot of cement, harden the hell up and build that damn bridge straightaway?
Fuck
. Nothing made sense. Nothing mattered. There was no longer a paved road toward the perfect future.

He was in limbo.

In the past, sex had always had healing qualities. The rush of release, the boost of endorphins. Hooking up with a random woman and starting the transition could be the best thing for him.

Doubtful.

He was so damn sick of the confusion. The warring emotions. It was bad enough making the decision to leave Cassie in the first place. Moving on seemed harder. Permanent. A divorce only ruined the piece of paper that made them husband and wife. Sleeping with someone else would finalize the process. Never to be rekindled.

He needed to sort his shit out. Now. Before he lost any more respect and entitlement.

So who was he? The bastard in need of closure? Or the man who’d vowed to forever remain true to Cassie, even after divorce tore them apart?

Hell
. He didn’t have a clue, but by the end of the night, he had a feeling he would.

Ch
apter Five

With shaky hands, Cassie placed her dress in the locker. Her skin was still on fire from the run-in with T.J. in the hall. It may be delusional or wishful thinking, but she could’ve sworn there’d been a spark of recognition in his eyes. Pain too.

“Are you meeting anyone here tonight?” Zoe asked. “Maybe your husband…”

Cassie looked down at herself, making sure her slip covered all her important parts. Her breasts had barely fit into the cups, their volume overflowing and creating a mass of cleavage. She didn’t have the courage to expose her stomach. The vulnerability of showing her thighs was hard enough with the material barely reaching the bottom of her matching panties. The more skin she covered, the better—for her confidence and T.J.’s inability to recognize her.

“I’m not married.” Cassie closed the locker door. She didn’t want to go into the details of her failed love life. The less connection she had to T.J., the smaller the chance of getting caught.

Zoe raised her chin and focused on Cassie’s hands. “Your rings say otherwise.”

“Oh,
shit
.” She turned her body away, frantically working the jewelry from her wedding finger. “It’s not what you think.”

The room filled with silence, the comforting aura Zoe had bathed her in washed away. Cassie worked the rings off and hastened to enter the security pin into the electronic locker keypad before anyone else spied the telling jewelry. “I’m not married,” she blurted. “Or I soon won’t be.”

How could she have forgotten her rings? They’d been a constant symbol of love and affection, more so since T.J. had abandoned her. They were the lifeline she gazed upon for fortitude. One glimpse at the diamonds adorning her finger would’ve been enough for her husband to recognize her.

“It’s not my business.” Zoe’s voice was low. “If cheating is your thing, so be it. I just think you should know that you’ll be booted if the owners find out. They don’t need the drama that will arise from a jealous partner.”

Cassie closed the locker door again, keeping her palm against the cool metal. “Please…” She didn’t know what to ask for. Help? Privacy? A hug? “My husband is meant to be here.”

There was no reason to trust this woman. None other than instinct. Yet Cassie did anyway. There was something in the woman’s demeanor. The way she held her head high, her shoulders straight, with comfort shining bright in her eyes.

“My husband
is
here,” Cassie repeated, stronger this time. “He wants a divorce, and I’m here to win him back.”

Silence.

They were alone in the room, the chattering voices from people in the hall echoing from outside. Cassie glanced to the side and met Zoe’s gaze. There was no longer friendship in her features. There was concern. Uncertainty… Pity.

“Do you need help?” she asked, although the pained tone announced she was out of her depth.

“No.” Cassie straightened. “All I need is a minute to myself to figure out what the hell I’m doing before I go in there.”

Zoe nodded, her brief glimpse of skin above her mask announcing her frown. “If you need someone, please find me. I’m usually in the first private room closest to the parking-lot entrance.”

Cassie gave a halfhearted smile in thanks. She was doing this all wrong. She wanted to show T.J. she was strong. Capable. For him, she could be fearless, facing the pain of the past, all for him.
Them.

Zoe sauntered toward the door and paused inside the frame. “Make sure you find me if you need me.” Then she was gone, allowing silence to sink back into the small space.

Cassie rested her back on the locker and let her head clang against the metal. What was she doing? She was half-dressed, in a sex club, hiding under a disguise in an attempt to…what? She could be a voyeur and merely watch to see if he was moving on. Or maybe seduce him, proving he was drawn to her even when her identity was cloaked.

Butterflies crept into her stomach, growing with every second she remained immobile. There’d been nothing to lose by entering the Vault. Apart from her dignity, and that was currently veiled. Nobody needed to know of her desperation to win T.J. back. She needed to stop succumbing to nerves and get this over and done with. She was running out of time and didn’t have the luxury to second-guess herself.

She pushed from the lockers and strode for the door. She followed after another couple, thankful they’d remembered the code to get into the main part of the club because she couldn’t remember the digits she’d been assigned in her approval letter.

Inside, there were more people than earlier. She passed two softly murmuring couples in the newbie lounge, their conversation unhindered by the large screen of porn playing beside them.

Her scalp itched as she dawdled through the rooms, getting to know her surroundings. People greeted her with smiles, others didn’t notice her existence because they were balls-deep in pussy or throat-deep in cock.

One of the private rooms contained numerous pieces of furniture. Almost like a maze of chaises, ottomans and silk-lined single mattresses. Most of which were occupied. There was a mass of mingling bodies, all of them glistening with the slight sheen of pleasure-induced sweat.

The second room was where she found Zoe, caught between two gorgeous men on the bed, aglow from lights in the ceiling. Both males were naked and paying homage to the woman’s lingerie-covered body, their attention transfixed. It was another exquisite scene where adoration played a vital role. There was no cockiness. No superiority. The three of them admired one another in scrapes of teeth and gentle swipes of fingers.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

Cassie glanced over her shoulder to the woman who had greeted Zoe when they’d first arrived—Shay—an employee her husband had spoken about many times.

“Very beautiful,” Cassie murmured, turning her attention to the main room to shield her face. “In fact, they’ve made me quite thirsty. Please excuse me while I get a drink.”

“No problem.”

Cassie walked away, discretely eying T.J.’s employee as she placed distance between them. Sometimes women were more perceptive than men. She didn’t want to risk Shay sensing her apprehension and informing management. At least not before she had a chance to speak to her husband.

She entered the main area and came to a halt at the bar, her heart kicking up in pace at the man who sat at the far end. The short wisps of his brown hair hung around his forehead as he sipped from the scotch glass in his hand. He was more familiar than her own body. His image more necessary to her senses than the need to breathe.

From the side, he seemed gaunt. Defeated. The desire to soothe him was painful. But at least he wasn’t happy, she supposed. His acceptance of their separation would’ve hurt more.

She drifted toward him, her feet moving of their own accord, her gaze glued to his frame. The stool beside him was taken, the man in her periphery barely visible because her vision was only attuned to one person. Had only ever been.

“Would you like a seat?” The guy beside T.J. stood, his hand gently clutching hers to guide her forward.

“Thank you,” she murmured, not taking her attention from her husband.

She was so close. Their arms would almost touch if she placed them on the bar. That’s all it would take, a brush of skin, a graze of appreciation. He was lost. So was she. But they were side by side and could find their way home together. All she had to do was open her mouth. Start a conversation. Give him hope and love.

She leaned in, her chest pounding the closer she moved, the more potent the scent of his deep, woody aftershave became. Her throat tightened. Memories of the past assailed her. She loved this man so much. It wasn’t the typical love found between a man and woman—the jovial smiles and regularly scheduled affection. They were much more than that. Their relationship had been a constant barrage of devotion. Each day growing more intense than the last. Every memory was bathed in happiness that would never be tainted.

She breathed deep of his aftershave, gaining strength from the well-known scent.

“Hi,” she murmured.