Authors: Unknown
'We haven't set a date,' Sophie said miserably. 'I just made that up.'
The silence around the table was longer this time as her colleagues digested Sophie's confession. She braved a quick look around the group. Janet and Josh both looked curious. Toni looked dismayed. Oliver looked unexpectedly disappointed.
'I'm sure you had a good reason,' he said coolly. 'I mean, you wouldn't have invented a date if it wasn't something you really wanted.'
'If it was something we really wanted it would have happened years ago,' Sophie said a little desperately. 'Maybe Josh was right. I haven't had enough experience when it comes to relationships.'
'I'm never right when it comes to relationships,' Josh said lightly. 'Don't listen to me, Sophie.'
'No, don't,' Toni agreed hastily. 'Just look at Josh's track record.'
'You can't give up that easily,' Janet added. 'Not after you've been together so long.'
Oliver was nodding seriously. 'Commitment is like honesty, Sophie. It's not something to give or take lightly.'
'I know.' Sophie stared at Oliver. What was he trying to do now? Persuade her to go back to Greg? Had she been correct in thinking that it had only been her unavailability that had made her attractive?
'Try and make it up with him,' Toni urged her. 'I'm sure it's not too late.'
Oliver looked away from Sophie. He pushed himself to his feet with a heavy sigh.
'Toni's quite right,' he told Sophie. 'It's never too late. Not when it's something you really want.' He glanced at his watch. 'Ross Selkirk is coming in for his mole removal in ten minutes. Do you still want to have a go at some minor surgery?'
'Oh, yes!' Sophie got to her feet hurriedly. 'I'd love to, if it's still all right with you. You'll have to supervise me, though, I haven't done one before.'
Oliver was waiting by the door for Sophie to catch up. 'Of course I'll supervise you.' He seemed to collect his thoughts and then he smiled cheerfully. 'It's precisely what I'm supposed to be doing with you, after all.'
So that's that, Sophie decided, trailing after Oliver to the treatment room. Even the thought of her being available had made Oliver retreat to his professional position. More than that, he'd deliberately given her a push back in Greg's direction. She had tampered with the rules of the game and Oliver didn't want to play any more. Well, fine. If he could put aside physical attraction and go back to how they had been when she'd first arrived at St David's, then so could she.
With something as interesting as minor surgery to concentrate on, it was actually remarkably easy. She was almost unaware of the pressure of Oliver's leg as he stood close beside her a short time later, peering over her shoulder.
'That's great. You've got a good elliptical incision there. Now catch the edge of the bit you're removing with the tweezers and gently stroke the scalpel down the sides. Try and leave a good margin.'
Sophie nodded, her tongue caught between her top teeth and bottom lip as she kept her attention focused. Their patient, Ross Selkirk, was the courier who usually attended to St. David's many deliveries and pickups. He hadn't minded a bit when Oliver had suggested that Sophie had a go at her first mole removal. She was determined not to let either of them down. She knew she was slow but it had to be perfect. Sophie swapped the scalpel for the scissors to snip one particularly tough adhesion.
'There,' she said eventually. She turned to drop the patch of skin and tissue into the specimen jar half full of formalin. At the same time Oliver moved to swab the incision site with a gauze pad. Their arms brushed but neither seemed to notice.
'What suture are you going to use, Sophie?'
'Five-O?'
'Good.' Oliver nodded his approval as he opened the sterile pack for her.
The wound gaped at Sophie like a small, smiling mouth. 'It's not bleeding much at all now,' she observed happily.
'That's the beauty of having the adrenaline in the lignocaine. You can only use plain lignocaine on any digits, though. Bit more bleeding to cope with then.'
Sophie had the curved needle attached to the length of suture thread grasped firmly in the needle holder in her right hand. She held her tweezers ready in her left hand. She inserted the needle through one side of the wound and then the other. She could feel the movement of Oliver's head as he nodded approval again, his head almost touching her shoulder.
'Excellent. How do you judge the width of each bite?'
'Roughly one to two times the thickness of the skin,' Sophie responded promptly. She pulled the length of suture until only a couple of inches remained, then she wound the thread twice around the needle holder and grasped the short end to slip the loops over it. Sophie smiled with satisfaction as she pulled it tight and the edges of the skin came together neatly. She knotted the stitch and held the ends up. Oliver snipped them off.
The voice of their patient was muffled by the pillow his head was buried in. 'How many stitches are you going to need, do you think?'
'Only three, Ross,' Sophie told him. 'Are you OK? I know I'm being a bit slower than Dr Spencer would have been.'
'I'm fine,' Ross said. 'Take as long as you like. This is a sight more relaxing than fighting traffic to try and get places on time.'
Sophie put her second suture at the other end of the wound. 'Work from the outside in,' she muttered to Oliver. 'One side, then the other. Leave the centre till last.' This time she did the loops around the needle holder more confidently. By the third suture the manoeuvre was almost a flourish.
'Cut, thanks,' she ordered Oliver with a grin.
Sophie cleaned up the neat wound with a swab and some Betadine, then covered it with a dressing. 'The stitches can come out in a week to ten days, Ross,' she said. 'We'll phone you as soon as we get the lab results. It doesn't look nasty but it pays to be careful, especially when it's been itchy like that.'
'Thanks, Doc.' Ross sat up and reached for his red and white shirt.
'You're welcome.' Sophie smiled broadly. 'I really enjoyed that.'
'I'll ask for you first next time, then.'
Oliver looked resigned. 'I see I'm going to have some competition for any minor surgery going around here. It's always been my specialty.'
'I'm sure you don't mind having Dr Bennett around.' Ross's gaze was openly admiring as Sophie passed him his red and white anorak. 'I know I wouldn't.'
Oliver's smile was automatic. 'We all love having Sophie around,' he said casually. 'Though unfortunately it's only temporary. She has someone waiting for her in Auckland.'
'Oh.' Ross nodded as though it was only to be expected. 'Lucky man.'
'Indeed,' Oliver agreed. Sophie waited in some trepidation for Oliver's next comment as Ross left the room, but Oliver merely raised his eyebrows. 'What have you got lined up for the rest of the afternoon, Sophie?'
'A study period next but I've got Pagan Ellis coming in later.' Sophie paused in the clean-up of the sterile tray, having dropped the metal instruments back into the kidney dish for Janet to re-sterilise. 'Would you sit in on that consult with me? I'm really not happy, trying to deal with something this way out.'
'Just lay the risks on the line for her,' Oliver advised. 'Be specific. Ask her if she really wants to end up with major difficulties and a dead baby miles from anywhere. You'll see, she'll book in at Women's with an obstetrical consultant on standby in no time flat.'
'Hmm.' Sophie was unconvinced. 'So I can call you if I'm not getting anywhere, then?'
'Of course.' Oliver's gaze was sincere. 'I'm here for you, anytime you need me, Sophie. You know that.'
Sophie dropped the used gloves and dressings into the rubbish bag and slotted the scalpel into the sealed sharps container. She took another quick glance at Oliver. No. There wasn't even a hint of any sexual undertone to his comment. He was offering professional support. Just as he had when she had first arrived. He looked as though he had never even considered offering anything else.
'Thanks,' Sophie murmured. 'I'm sure I can cope.'
Periods of time set aside for Sophie to study were a regular part of her timetable at St David's, but the subject she found herself pondering that afternoon had little to do with the practice of medicine.
She had tried to put things right but, instead of helping, it seemed to have made things worse. What had she expected? She'd known Oliver's interest might not last, but to have it evaporate before he'd even tried to follow it through was confusing. Not to mention humiliating. If he hadn't found something desirable in that first kiss why had he almost tried again this morning?
God! Just the thought of that second attempt was enough to make Sophie's pulse thump painfully. She would have kissed him back, too. And more. Was she so naive and inexperienced that she couldn't recognise the power of physical attraction? Maybe Greg had been right. The flames of a passionate sexual attraction never lasted and easily blinded someone to a lover's real personality. Love wasn't blind but lust certainly was. What Sophie Bennett was feeling for Oliver Spencer had to be lust. Why else would she have failed to heed the warning signs of sheer arrogance, amply demonstrated again today by his casual implication of attraction and his equally casual withdrawal? Why else would she be feeling such an acute physical frustration right now?
Oliver could switch it off—as easily as if it was a card to be discarded in the hand he was playing. It meant nothing. He had said it himself. Oliver wasn't planning to ride off into a blissful sunset with her. He was merely offering a comparison. A sort of free sample of what might still be available out there. Perhaps it was normal behaviour in the adult world. Sophie had seen and read enough to know about casual attitudes to sexual relationships. She wasn't
that
naive.
Sophie had never learned the rules of the game Oliver was playing because she had never been tempted to join in. Until now. And she still wasn't going to play, however powerful the physical incentive. She was quite experienced enough to know that if she played with fire she was very likely to get burnt.
Oliver Spencer didn't want her. Not on any meaningful level. He thought she should make things up with Greg and reinstate her engagement. Maybe he was right. It would be far safer to abandon the fire the likes of Oliver Spencer represented and stay with the warm glow she had always previously been satisfied with. Safer and much easier. Sophie nodded slowly to herself. She would ring Greg. If he agreed, she would resign her registrar post and move back to Auckland. Take a job in the hospital or another general practice. She would put her life back on the rails. If she cut Oliver Spencer out of her existence now, any wound would soon heal. The danger lay in allowing the vulnerability to deepen, and Sophie was not about to become an emotional victim.
The phone in Sophie's office was internal so it couldn't be used for a toll call. The reception area was fortunately deserted. Toni was making her usual daily visit to the bank and post office just down the road. Janet was looking after the desk and the phones but was at present ushering a Mrs Kincaid into the treatment room for a flu shot.
'You realise you'll need to wait for twenty minutes after the vaccination, Mrs Kincaid?' Janet queried. 'That's just so we can be sure you're not going to have any kind of adverse reaction.'
'That's fine, Nurse. I've got nothing very important to do this afternoon.'
Sophie waited until the door of the treatment room swung closed. She picked up one of the phones on Toni's desk and dialled quickly.
'Could you page Dr Greg Hayes for me, please?' Sophie asked the operator. 'His beep number is 374.'
'Sophie!' Greg sounded astonished. 'Is something wrong?'
'No. I just wanted to talk to you.' Sophie found herself smiling at Greg's familiar voice. 'I...I've been thinking about you.'
'You're lucky you caught me. I'm just on my way to an ICU staff conference. The pace is frantic up here at the moment. We've got a patient overflow that's hitting crisis level.'
'Sorry. I know you're busy. I've tried ringing you at home a few times. You never seem to be there.'
'No.' Greg sounded embarrassed. 'I'm out a fair bit.' There was a short, awkward pause. 'Did you get the flowers?'
'Yes, thank you. It was sweet of you. That was really why I was ringing. I wanted to say I thought you might be...' Sophie searched for some way to tell Greg she had changed her mind, but the words didn't want to come out. Did she really believe that Greg had been right? Did she really want to put things back the way they had been?
'Missing you?' Greg broke the pause. 'Of course I am. But you were right, you know, Soph. When I really thought about it I realised exactly what our relationship had been missing, and...'
'And?' Sophie prompted. Suddenly she wished she hadn't made this call.
'And...ah...I'm not sure how to say this.' Greg sounded as though he also wished Sophie hadn't made the call.
'You've found someone else?' Sophie suggested. She tried to laugh. 'That was quick, Greg.'
Greg cleared his throat loudly. 'We've been working together for ages. I guess I'd been ignoring the spark between us but you made me take another look.'
Sophie couldn't help a faintly derisive snort. So she had been responsible?
'It would never have come to anything, Soph, if you hadn't decided... I mean, I don't want you to think I was cheating on you or anything.'
'No. That's OK, Greg. I understand.' Sophie was aware of Janet returning to the office area behind her. She could hear the files in one of the in-baskets being shuffled. She held the phone more tightly against her ear and lowered her voice.
'We'll always be friends,' Greg said gently. 'Very special friends. I do love you, Soph. You know that, don't you?'
'Yes, I know.' Sophie pressed her lips together to hold back the tears. She took a deep breath. 'I feel the same way, Greg. I love you, too.'
She put the phone down slowly. That was that, then. She'd burnt her bridges or perhaps her bolt hole. Strangely, the effect was one of relief. Going backwards would have been a huge mistake. Greg might make a good friend but, as far as a partner in a marriage went, he had just revealed a rather telling inadequacy. Greg was no different to any other man when it came to the crunch. Five minutes without her and he'd already found a replacement. Sophie knew she shouldn't blame Greg. Perhaps it was just her pride that was wounded.